₦airaland Forum

Hey my Nairaland fam.

There's this neighbor of mine,a girl in her early 20's who's still living with her parents. Recently,I got to know that that took jamb and had even written the exam. So,this morning she came to me to advise her on the next step to take since her result came out and she scored 173. First,this is someone whom I know who doesn't have any skill or handwork. Secondly,her parents aren't that well-to-do type that can see a child through any university at this moment considering how expensive the Nigerian higher institutions have become.

I told her openly that she should go and learn a skill from now till next year and can retake the jamb next year. Though she agreed to what I told her but since then,she has been behaving so cold towards me. Someone who used to respond to me jokes before no longer talks to me. And I've been wondering if what I did was wrong. Or perhaps,I should have just mind my business and let her continue with what she intended on doing.

Nlfpmod obembet Dominique mynd44 Seun Dominique nlfpmod.

Nlfpmod obembet Dominique mynd44 Seun Dominique

A wise advice if you ask me
But where did you give her this advice, inside or outside?

Her results should be the concern, not about who will train her. She may have well to do relatives that you don't know about.

Some universities in Nigeria accept 170 cut off mark, especially for agric courses.

insidelife22:
A wise advice if you ask me
But where did you give her this advice, inside or outside?

on top, if you don gerrit, forgeraboutit

She came for knack in the guise of looking for advice and you disappointed her. So she ran away

You've done your best OP. Truth is bitter and it is the bitter kola you gave her that is making her cold. You have done your best. This is what men do, they can see some things and tell you the truth. Do you want to fund her fantasy or let her find her future?

No one should remain at home because of school fees
There's NELFUND
school fees plus 20k per month upkeep

Mr advicers, hope you had not been touching that girl because e no dey hard una Well, good advice..

franchasng:
on top, if you don gerrit, forgeraboutit

Oh gorit.

OP. Just talk your mind, leave all these jamb score matter.

Nobody go reason you, and if they do, nothing still spoil...

Do you know she can still gain admission with that result
So, you rather she waste the money she used in preparing and writing jamb, and go learn a skill.

Have you heard about work study
Next time, if you don't know what to say, or advice to give, you just keep quiet, or you ask first.
And I guess you don't know she can be schooling and be learning work.

insidelife22:
A wise advice if you ask me
But where did you give her this advice, inside or outside?

The advice was given after collecting one hand when the girls parents was not around



I can bet with my two balls

You can do well by showing here evidence.
She's is still young and oblivious of unemployment

Why are you feeling bad.
You are not the reason she’s feeling cold, her situation is making her feel cold.

You sound 13. If you know the reality of life after school, you'll advice everyone to get a skill first and study later.

stan4b:
Do you know she can still gain admission with that result
So, you rather she waste the money she used in preparing and writing jamb, and go learn a skill.

Have you heard about work study
Next time, if you don't know what to say, or advice to give, you just keep quiet, or you ask first.
And I guess you don't know she can be schooling and be learning work.

Cashio:
You sound 13. If you know the reality of life after school, you'll advice everyone to get a skill first and study later.

Mr advanced in age, you didn't read where the op said she has already sat for jamb before seeking advice from him
Or, will you and the op refund to her all the money she spent for tutorial and jamb registration??

Since you want to sound 40, pls, answer the op and you guys should discuss how you'll refund her money and stress she used in sitting for the jamb.

She didn’t ask you whether she should study or learn a trade, instead she asked for guidance on the next step in her academic journey. You gave an unsolicited opinion rather than sound advice. You probably shattered her dreams and impacted her momentum. Next time stick to the topic the person brings to you instead of going off on your own limited knowledge of the person’s abilities and resources.

Toolegit123:
Hey my Nairaland fam.

There's this neighbor of mine,a girl in her early 20's who's still living with her parents. Recently,I got to know that that took jamb and had even written the exam. So,this morning she came to me to advise her on the next step to take since her result came out and she scored 173. First,this is someone whom I know who doesn't have any skill or handwork. Secondly,her parents aren't that well-to-do type that can see a child through any university at this moment considering how expensive the Nigerian higher institutions have become.

I told her openly that she should go and learn a skill from now till next year and can retake the jamb next year. Though she agreed to what I told her but since then,she has been behaving so cold towards me. Someone who used to respond to me jokes before no longer talks to me. And I've been wondering if what I did was wrong. Or perhaps,I should have just mind my business and let her continue with what she intended on doing.

Nlfpmod obembet Dominique mynd44 Seun Dominique nlfpmod.

Leave her, she will understand your CANDID & HONEST advice in the next ten years. Meanwhile, that shouldn't stop you to continuing giving same advice to the next person at her age, even if her/his parents are well to do.

At this stage of the girl in question, only 2% thinking rationally, when you advise them about others opinion that different from theirs, they will see you as enermy.

At this stage of life, many all of them will look up into the future and see themselves as Presidents, CEOs, Billionaires, Ministers, Ambassadors, etc, but time will tell, ......only fragments of them will scape through.

You did well, but you wouldn't have said so, because of her level of understanding,

Toolegit123:
Hey my Nairaland fam.

There's this neighbor of mine,a girl in her early 20's who's still living with her parents. Recently,I got to know that that took jamb and had even written the exam. So,this morning she came to me to advise her on the next step to take since her result came out and she scored 173. First,this is someone whom I know who doesn't have any skill or handwork. Secondly,her parents aren't that well-to-do type that can see a child through any university at this moment considering how expensive the Nigerian higher institutions have become.

I told her openly that she should go and learn a skill from now till next year and can retake the jamb next year. Though she agreed to what I told her but since then,she has been behaving so cold towards me. Someone who used to respond to me jokes before no longer talks to me. And I've been wondering if what I did was wrong. Or perhaps,I should have just mind my business and let her continue with what she intended on doing.

Nlfpmod obembet Dominique mynd44 Seun Dominique nlfpmod.

You need to take a course on emotional intelligence.

I said earlier and it remains same. If you know what life is after school, even worse for a poly graduate, you'll advise her to go learn a skill first and study later. Her jamb score is very low. She can't gain any admission into the university with that, especially for someone with no one.
Instead of wasting almost six years in the poly with grade, make she learn skill and resit next year.
Ask 100 poly students, 98 will swear none of their kids will attend poly. You too seems to need the advise more than the jambite

stan4b:
Mr advanced in age, you didn't read where the op said she has already sat for jamb before seeking advice from him
Or, will you and the op refund to her all the money she spent for tutorial and jamb registration??

Since you want to sound 40, pls, answer the op and you guys should discuss how you'll refund her money and stress she used in sitting for the jamb.

Cashio:
I said earlier and it remains same. If you know what life is after school, even worse for a poly graduate, you'll advise her to go learn a skill first and study later. Her jamb score is very low. She can't gain any admission into the university with that, especially for someone with no one.
Instead of wasting almost six years in the poly with grade, make she learn skill and resit next year.
Ask 100 poly students, 98 will swear none of their kids will attend poly. You too seems to need the advise more than the jambite

She can actually use 173 jamb score to gain admission, it only depends on her choice of school and course.

stan4b:
She can actually use 173 jamb score to gain admission, it only depends on her choice of school and course.

And that course will almost be as useless and she would be better off without it.
For someone who has very little support, learn a skill first before entering into any higher institution, else you go suffer.
Also, for someone with little support, study hard to get a reasonable course at least. One year learning a skill and doing better next year is better than going in to waste four five years and graduating eventually to come back to learn the same skill.
For your information, over 80% of Nigerian graduates eventually go back to learning a skill after school. So if you learn the skill before furthering your academics, you have an edge because you have a means to sustain through school and at the same time, you have something to fall back to immediately after school which might end up being your business for life in case you didn't get a job and the probability of getting a job in Nigeria after school for a nobody is probably less than 20%.

Cashio:
And that course will almost be as useless and she would be better off without it.
For someone who has very little support, learn a skill first before entering into any higher institution, else you go suffer.
Also, for someone with little support, study hard to get a reasonable course at least. One year learning a skill and doing better next year is better than going in to waste four five years and graduating eventually to come back to learn the same skill.
For your information, over 80% of Nigerian graduates eventually go back to learning a skill after school. So if you learn the skill before furthering your academics, you have an edge because you have a means to sustain through school and at the same time, you have something to fall back to immediately after school which might end up being your business for life in case you didn't get a job and the probability of getting a job in Nigeria after school for a nobody is probably less than 20%.

Go back and read what you typed again.

You are starting to sound like a child.

So, you don't know they do change of course in school

And who tell you it's only what you read in school you use to get jobs in Nigeria??

Or, you don't know people learn skills during their nysc, in camp and mostly during their deployment to their PPA??

Or, you think to gain admission is very easy abi?? She can just useless her jamb result now, then she'll sit for jamb again anytime she likes, and jamb will automatically give her pass mark.

Na me wey dey reply you sha. Bye.
Only God even knows if you have seen the four walls of an higher institution sef.