₦airaland Forum

"Why won't you make your wife look like the woman you chase outside?" — Lady questions men over double standards

A Nigerian lady has sparked conversations online after questioning men who discourage their wives from dressing elegantly while admiring the same appearance in other women.

In a viral video, the woman criticised husbands who prevent their wives from fixing their lashes, wearing stylish outfits or maintaining their appearance because they fear other men may notice them.

She questioned why some men would proudly attend social events with women outside their marriages because of their neat appearance, while refusing to support their wives in achieving a similar look.

Lady challenges husbands over appearance and jealousy

The woman said, “So you don’t like your wife dressing neat, fixing lashes abi but your side chick will do it. What type of man are you?”

She argued that some men create a situation where their wives are unable to express themselves through fashion and beauty choices, yet they appreciate those same qualities in other women.

The lady added, “Why don’t you make your wife look like that kind of woman you would chase outside? I’m asking you now, why? Why won’t you make your wife look like what you want.”

Her comments have generated discussions about relationships, insecurity and the importance of mutual support between couples.

Nigerians debate expectations in marriages
Many social media users joined the conversation, with some agreeing that partners should encourage each other’s confidence and personal grooming, while others noted that couples should respect individual choices and avoid pressure.

The discussion has renewed conversations about double standards in marriages, with many highlighting the need for communication, trust and appreciation between spouses.

The video continues to attract reactions online as Nigerians share different opinions on whether partners should influence each other’s appearance or allow personal freedom.

"You don't like your wife dressing neatly, but you prefer to see your side chick looking good. What kind of husband are you?"

— Lady reacts. pic.twitter.com/wuJ29NHv6K

— CHUKS 🍥 (@ChuksEricE) July 28, 2026

What gave you the impression that you can make anyone into whatever you want? Imagine the arrogance

I don't think there are men who won't want their wives to look good maybe with the exception of archaic men in the village. Men take pride when their wives look good and decent.

Of course, what this woman is talking about is men not allowing their wives to dress like sl*uts. Which sensible man will allow that?

99% of the time, whenever a woman is complaining about a man not allowing her to dress the way she wants, just know she wants to dress like a h*oe with every part of her body exposed.

Are these women disadvantaged that they cannot do anything for themselves unless a man does it? Madam adulthood comes with responsibilities and it involves taking care of yourself, your partner has nothing to do with you keeping yourself neat as a human. If you cannot take such responsibilities what then are you doing as an adult?

All these women blaming men for what they should do for themselves.

Most Nigeria women just want to get married, give birth ND become a sharpless house wife. It's crazy

What do you want them to do since you don't want them going to the gym?

kimjessey2019:
Most Nigeria women just want to get married, give birth ND become a sharpless house wife. It's crazy

No man will want their wife smoking weed too

EmmyMaestro:
[b]"Why won't you make or allow personal freedom.


-widy-questions-men-over-double-standards%2F

If you make your wife look like the woman you chase outside, other men will chase her too

They do not want their wives to become targets of other predators like them out there. Anyway, that's for women who allow themselves to be conquered by their husbands.

Is it your husband responsibility for you to look good?

He is already feeding and housing both you and the children Madam.

The same way you spent on yourself when you were still single and attracted him, you can still do that as his wife.

YES! He can decide to surprise you with gifts e.g New hair, make-up, fancy dresses, jewelries etc once in awhile but if he don't get you those stuffs, better get a job and get them for yourself.

My gender and their wahala



May God help us

No man ever refused his wife to go to the gym unless she have the tendency to cheat

Samantha125:
What do you want them to do since you don't want them going to the gym?

You guys are the same people always speaking against your wives going to the gym on this very same forum.

Basically, you don't know what you want, you keep making contradictory statements by the day.

kimjessey2019:
No man ever refused his wife to go to the gym unless she have the tendency to cheat

Please I know what I want and I I'm just telling you.

Samantha125:
You guys are the same people always speaking against your wives going to the gym on this very same forum.

Basically, you don't know what you want, you keep making contradictory statements by the day.

Some men can't even fix themselves talk less of fixing someone else.

Nnamdipapa:
What gave you the impression that you can make anyone into whatever you want? Imagine the arrogance

Seriously, some women dey make person just taya for everything, You want them to act accordingly by teaching and correcting them, they will rebel against you and call you controlling but now this one is saying we should "make them". Any man when they follow women word for word na High blood pressure and confusion go kill am. They don't even know what they want and most of them still fight against being submissive enough to be corrected. Abegii

Well, obviously, it's all about the little things. a few tweaks to make it even more enticing. It's all about the subtle, the elegant. and a little bit of persuasion, of course.

Nnamdipapa:
What gave you the impression that you can make anyone into whatever you want? Imagine the arrogance

If dem tell dem the price those side chicks pay to remain in shape and attractive, an average madam will say “God forbid “. And would prefer to maintain the status quo.

Nnamdipapa:
What gave you the impression that you can make anyone into whatever you want? Imagine the arrogance

You couldn’t have asked the question better

You can’t just mold anyone into what you desire ..

The side chick may have what the wife could never have..

I don't think women have understood men seriously.


A man cheat not just because his wife isn't beautiful or sexy.


A man can be married to the most beautiful and hot woman on earth and still cheat with a less attractive woman or girl, that is the mystery about men and having extramarital affairs or multiple girlfriends while single.



The reason men have extramarital affairs or keep multiple girlfriends is beyond physical beauty. Men don't attach emotion to infidelity, that is why its possible for a man that loves his wife to still have extramarital affairs with another woman.


Most men cannot even explain why they do it, they just find themselves doing it or trying to do it lol. That's why many have said its a natural weakness in men which can only be overcome by special grace through Jesus Christ or by fear of something (finance, divorce, reputation, spiritual consequences, etc).


Aside that fear of something or fear of consequences, every sexually active man will cheat when the opportunity presents itself.


Another thing that can force a man to stay sexually active with one woman or one partner is lack of money, lack of opportunities, location, sickness, anxiety and maybe depression.


So dear ladies, stop disturbing yourself about how you look, your husband or boyfriend is cheating not because you are not beautiful or beautiful enough, yes you need to look good and take care of your body and looks, but I tell you that men keep extramarital affairs or multiple girlfriends for numerous reasons, including natural weakness in controlling their sex urge, not just because their wife or girlfriend is ugly, its very far from it. It's not also about not being good in bed, it can contribute to it but that too is never the reason your husband or boyfriend is cheating or wants to cheat.

Has the OP ever heard of biological clock for women

For randy men, the wife can NEVER be enough no matter how good she looks.....

Hmmmm. Wahala jam trouble

Samantha125:
What do you want them to do since you don't want them going to the gym?

so until they go to gym before they can take care of themselves . nawa ooh .oya collect

AbosedeFalade:
They do not want their wives to become targets of other predators like them out there. Anyway, that's for women who allow themselves to be conquered by their husbands.

So you want to be married and still want other men's attention? Is that what this is about? Lol your last sentence really shows who's behind the moniker. Thank God all women can't be the same, everyone will find their levels🙏🏾

You cannot change anybody.
If your wife is not stylish, she cannot suddenly become stylish overnight.
If your wife doesn't like the things you like, you cannot change her to do so.
If she acts like she's in tune with you when in deep she isn't, it is just pretense.
The decision of marriage is not to force someone to change for you. It's about choosing who is naturally compatible with you.

Women have a lot to learn. There are other things involved. What are you describing as ‘neat appearance’? When men think about neatness they don’t remember makeup or eyelashes or fake nails, or wild hairstyles. These are your own ideas of what neatness is. But for me those are dirts neatness.

NOETHNICITY:
Women have a lot to learn. There are other things involved. What are you describing as ‘neat appearance’? When men think about neatness they don’t remember makeup or eyelashes or fake nails, or wild hairstyles. These are your own ideas of what neatness is. But for me those are dirts neatness.

Some men, not even broke men, I mean highly placed men prefer or crave to have sex with the kind of girls their wife may classify as dirty, men and sexual exploration is a big mystery that only nature understands.



Anybody judging a man just by his sexual weakness alone is making a huge mistake because you will be surprised that at the end, that man you classify as sexually immoral or wayward might be a man after God's heart because only God that made him understands the battle he fights when it comes to sexual matters.



Sexual conduct alone does not define a man.


To me, what defines a good man are:


Kindness - is he kind?
Empathy - is he empathetic?
Conscience - does he have human conscience?
Greed - is he greedy?
Contentment - is he contented with material things?
Honesty - is he a honest man?
Generosity - is he generous with what he has?

Hardworking - is he hardworking and dedicated to what earns him income?

Family oriented - is he a family oriented man who cares about his family?

Godly - does he have respect or fear of God?

Aspiration - what are his aspirations?

Wisdom - is he a wise man that weighs his actions before acting?

Respectful - does he respect elders and those he ought to respect?

Its a cultural thing normalized decades ago for women to be depended on men. Are African women not tired of this manipulation?

Why should women wait for men to dress them in marriage? How was she able to afford the neat style before marriage? From other men? From her parents? Why didnt she become self sustained like men before entering marriage so she can fund her neat style while being able to take care of other responsibilities as agreed with her partner? I wont dictate for anyone to accept of reject 50 -50. But I am telling you that you need a source for your personal welfare. And if that man decided to intrude your personal welfare, that's when we look into suppression and manipulation in marriage which can be dealt with thoroughly.

The 50 - 50 in marriage debate. I don't get into it. And the low budget feminists vs low budget alpha males - I dont get involved in such rubbish.

This is a tech age, and women are smarter than men in this area. The era of making money with strength is over. Even at that time, men stylishly passed the hard farm work to women by making them babies machine to give them workers (both males and females). But in this era, you print money with your brain, and those still wanting to use energy to earn income work under you. Women are better than men in this area, so, why are these ones still going about de-marketing women?

Well, some dont want to get out of the chain of manipulation. And this lady in this video is one. Ladies, just let her be. Let her subject herself to men dominance felling she is authoritative in her affairs. Lol. Go ahead and learn innovative skills - AI, Genetics, IOT, modern finance, trading, or even modern artisans methodologies - modern plumbing, electrical connections, building, etc. Attract the right man so you can enjoy your marriage.

Good luck to you all.

Many of wives at home, just tell them this is what you want/cherish , they would change it for you, .... you are too bossy, you are insecure, I'm not a dog, I'm your wife, blablablah.

The same thing they are reluctant to do for hubby, they would be crazily doing it for outsiders( pastor/Iman, boss, even concubine atimes.)