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He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy - Family (3) - Nairaland

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Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by GboyegaD(m): 11:19pm On Jan 10, 2015
Many of us are commenting without considering the stance of the OP. I'm sure if the parents were very well to do, his intonation would have been much more different. OP, be determined and pay for grace to be able to shoulder the responsibilities when they start top come in.

1 Like

Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by nduchucks: 11:22pm On Jan 10, 2015
@op, I'm not sure that you should be expressing reservations on your parent's decision to have one more child, regardless of how many they already have.

Some married couples decide not to have any child at all, so that they will have enough money for both of them without having to spend on children. Now imagine that your parents were such a couple, you would not have even existed.

So oga, find ya level well well o, because if lorry hit you today and you die, those children will still live their lives.
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by boxxy(f): 11:23pm On Jan 10, 2015
It is not even d multiple birth dat bothers me , is the terrible economy facing majority now. Obviously your mum isn't educated take her to a family planning clinic for what is best for her ..Pele good luck and stay positive .

2 Likes

Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by Nobody: 11:26pm On Jan 10, 2015
Most african fathers shuld be brain-checked! Why produce 10 when u can only cater to 2?

7 Likes

Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by Nobody: 11:30pm On Jan 10, 2015
I say depopulate Nigeria by all means! What is going on?! angry lipsrsealed cry cry cry cry

1 Like

Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by yemivictor: 11:33pm On Jan 10, 2015
OP, are your parents Catholics? If yes, then the question is answered on the multiple births.
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by cococandy(f): 11:34pm On Jan 10, 2015
shocked shocked shocked

Some people sha
moca:
This is sad.
My inlaw's dad married 3 wives.
First wife had no child.
So it started with my inlaw's mum(2nd wife)
He was d eldest and had a good paying job in an oil company. A very down to earth man and can use his last kobo to help d needy.
When d dad saw he has a down to earth happening boy as d first son, guess what?
He started making plan 4 d 4th wife.

Meanwhile d guy is d bread winner in d family.
It was really affecting him even with his good pay. He called and warned his dad sternly or else he should count him off as his son.

Yes, it got to an extent he started looking for work outside d country. Once he got one, he moved with his family.
He said if he didn't do it that way, he will never ever amount to anything.

So @op has d right to be angry and mad.
Assuming @op married a wife that don't like too much extended family wahala nko?
What of if he didn't make it big on time?

Even girls of nowadays r very skeptical of marrying a first son with football team behind him.

So he is right to be mad.

@op, d earlier u start looking for way to help urself to become somebody in life d better.
Goodluck.

1 Like

Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by evea: 11:35pm On Jan 10, 2015
virginboy1:
Eight years ago when I got the news that my mum was pregnant,I was devastated,while everybody were busy expressing the mantra "every child is a blessing".I wasn't happy because another child from a family of 7 will be coming to join this difficult society and as the first Issue of the Family I wasn't comfortable due to the unforseen burden I was going to carry.I pondered over it and got over it with time.

Fast Forward to this year 2015,I just got a news that my mom is pregnant again.
As the 1st child,I am really worried,perplexed and scared.Why?"Finance Responsibilities".

I wonder why many parent create burdens for the first child knownily and unknownily.Moreover,I am still a student.Am disappointed in my dad though.
Also,my mom is in her late 40s,I am afraid of her health,at times I do feel pity and sad for her whenever she walks with weakness and tiredness.

Please all expereinced and knowlegable nairalanders,I need your opinion,discretion,assertions and adviced on this issue please.Thank You.







lol. last born tins. dey want children 2 b by dem always if all the 7children Don marry walk or school or life. mk dey know say children dey house 2 shout. its beta no marriage pressure on you cos of oda kids. lol
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by donmalcolm21(m): 11:49pm On Jan 10, 2015
Rosarie:
seriously coming here will not evn stop a ninth child.u should b talking to ur mom which i can c u u ve not.na wa ooo.in dis jet age.me sef dey plan according to economy.no matter how Hot i n hubby are.i remind him we re or nt ready ooo.n worse u cnt talk to dem cos it will b embarrassing.but seriously no mtr d embarrasment tell dad politely dey need a full stop
I think when he came to this forum, he has inadvertently stopped a ninth child with the kind of sound advice being given by people here.
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by donmalcolm21(m): 11:52pm On Jan 10, 2015
nduchucks:
@op, I'm not sure that you should be expressing reservations on your parent's decision to have one more child, regardless of how many they already have.

Some married couples decide not to have any child at all, so that they will have enough money for both of them without having to spend on children. Now imagine that your parents were such a couple, you would not have even existed.

So oga, find ya level well well o, because if lorry hit you today and you die, those children will still live their lives.
I thought when people type with paragraph there is a 90% chance that they are reasonable but Boy you prove me wrong with this your analysis.

5 Likes

Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by Ologunjude(m): 11:54pm On Jan 10, 2015
Family planning is the best option. If your younger are not yet in school try encouraging to getting jobs so everyone can help contribute their quota. They can keep working and school - part time.
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by IbokUtoroh(m): 11:55pm On Jan 10, 2015
virginboy1:
Eight years ago when I got the news that my mum was pregnant,I was devastated,while everybody were busy expressing the mantra "every child is a blessing".I wasn't happy because another child from a family of 7 will be coming to join this difficult society and as the first Issue of the Family I wasn't comfortable due to the unforseen burden I was going to carry.I pondered over it and got over it with time.

Fast Forward to this year 2015,I just got a news that my mom is pregnant again.
As the 1st child,I am really worried,perplexed and scared.Why?"Finance Responsibilities".

I wonder why many parent create burdens for the first child knownily and unknownily.Moreover,I am still a student.Am disappointed in my dad though.
Also,my mom is in her late 40s,I am afraid of her health,at times I do feel pity and sad for her whenever she walks with weakness and tiredness.

Please all expereinced and knowlegable nairalanders,I need your opinion,discretion,assertions and adviced on this issue please.Thank You.






go n vote buhari, n he will sTABILIZE ur conditions.
-i heard he is going to stabilize everything when he comes in even CORRUPTION!
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by xtervaganza(m): 12:18am On Jan 11, 2015
Hmmmmmm I hope you won't hate the new baby sha
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by 2rez: 12:32am On Jan 11, 2015
meehn, yur momma z so blezzed wit ferti
lity dude grin. Do tha needful by givin her some OTs about family plannin'. Help a mother in need bruv. kiss.
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by Richy4(m): 1:15am On Jan 11, 2015
You do not really have to worry yourself sick about that OP. if your parent are not worried, I just wondered the reason why you should

They have planned how many kids they intended having before you were born. so you cannot just get out from the womb and start redirecting.

you never can tell what this unborn one could be. he/she might end up being the breadwinner of the house. so shhhhhh
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by diasporaman(m): 1:56am On Jan 11, 2015
Buy a carton of condom and give it to your dad as gift as soon as posssible. For now you and your siblings can make a basketball team .unless you prefer a football team cry

1 Like

Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by Nobody: 2:46am On Jan 11, 2015
Ologunjude:
Family planning is the best option. If your younger are not yet in school try encouraging to getting jobs so everyone can help contribute their quota. They can keep working and school - part time.

OP, this is a great suggestion! There's no reason for you to do it alone. In fact, it would be a terrible idea to do it alone.

There's one TV series I love called "Shameless" (the US version), and it's about a group of siblings who have to fend for themselves because their mother abandoned them and their father is a drunk. The eldest sister gave up on going to university to take care of her younger siblings, but eventually she started to take her life back, because she started letting the next eldest siblings take some responsibility. She had to let go of the mentality that everything was on her head. She learned the lesson the hard way when the pressure finally got to her and she crumbled: she got arrested, she lost her job, her siblings were all taken into foster care because she was the only legal guardian... When everything settled down, she started doing things differently.

You have a life to live. You are more than a caregiver. Make this a team effort.

You mentioned that your next two siblings are somewhat close to you in age? Confide in them, discuss, and plan. Maybe, depending on your family dynamic, the three of you can speak to your mother together?

Don't lose hope. This experience will surely forge you into a strong man.

6 Likes

Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by Rosarie(f): 2:57am On Jan 11, 2015
Abbey2sam:


Did your father and mother relieve the Borden on you already? You're just been paranoia.....at least they can still take care of there children
did u miss the dad will soon retire part

2 Likes

Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by soulglo: 4:10am On Jan 11, 2015
EfemenaXY:


Well said.

I'm surprised this needs to spelt out in so much detail for people to understand why this is a no-no. Anyway, I agree with everything you say apart from the bolded.

For women her age with that much kids, going on the pill isn't advisable as the risks include getting cancer / fibroids...not sure which one. But you are spot on about the need for her to get some sort of birth control fitted as soon as she's birthed this kid.

In Nigeria you can walk into any government hospital and get an IUD. No excuse for this nonsense

2 Likes

Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by killercute16(m): 6:39am On Jan 11, 2015
BeeBeeOoh:
As my oga at d top said.. I'm coming back

EHEEN! Adon come back



Na goodmorning dey bring about how are u, if papa no mis-shoot ball 4 field mama no fit mis-catch for goal post. So wetin I dey try talk b sey, tell ur papa 2 hang hin boot sey hin don create record finish sey even Beckam, Ronaldinho, Raul, Ronaldo, Maradona & Pele dem create enof record come hang boot leave ground 4 Messi & C.Ronaldo dem wey go even hang boot soon..
lol...nice one there.
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by killercute16(m): 6:42am On Jan 11, 2015
That child might be GMB of 2015 oh...so dont complain,it might be a blessing.
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by Nobody: 7:08am On Jan 11, 2015
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by dammywapes(m): 7:28am On Jan 11, 2015
Sitting by the door
One morning,
Looking at the children going to school man, then I thought about the ones in the street;
Moving up and down
No where to go,
No education,
No future.
Then I thought about their parents man, why do they suffer so much.
If they have parents why.
(if you really don't want no children why do you have them, why)

We can fight and no one's hurt
We can stop children from the street.

It's a cold winter man, moving back cooler down khilo street man
His father is relaxing in the best bar in town asking them to fill his glass man.

His mother is kissing on another man.
If you really don't want no children, why do you have them.
If you can't care for them why..

2 Likes

Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by Nobody: 7:43am On Jan 11, 2015
Bros, when did 6+2 become 10?

striktlymi:
Hi,

I am from a large family of ten ( 6 guys and 2 ladies). We were supposed to be 12 actually, the last two were still births.

Like your mum, my mum got pregnant with her last child in her late forties. Like you, I found it a bit awkward but unlike you, I didn't think much about the added responsibility.

I could say my parents brought us up to accept the family responsibilities when they do come. Though my dad was fully responsible for our education before he retired, he made us understand that there will come a time where we would need to be responsible for each other.

His slogan then was that God brought us together for a reason. No one was a mistake and today we are a family of very educated individuals who are doing well in their respective endeavours.

The road is always hard at first but I shyt you not when I tell you that it would be alright in the end. All that is needed is for all of you to be focused.

Responsibilities are good, you just need to prepare yourself. Being sad about it is definitely not the way to go. I am a living example of how good things can turn out to be.
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by Provie(m): 7:53am On Jan 11, 2015
virginboy1:

I am 26yrs old,my younger bro 24yrs just graduated,i have a younger sis (22yrs) in the unversity,another sis(19yrs) battling with admission. And two siblings(10 and 8 yrs) still in primary school.
My dad is about to be retired.
I ought not to be complaining,but i just have to because its bodering me alot.
And am here battling with varsity fees.

@Op ur circumstances are similar to mine.

Now how close are you to your dad? By d time my dad retired, he had trained only d first two of us. However, we were so close and he appreciated the responsibilities he "created" for us. Upon retirement, he spent 80% of his lump gratuity (in cash) between the two of us, and we practically took over. Two others hav now graduated and one comfortably employed and helping too.

What am I saying? Maintain a high level of closeness with him. U wil b shocked to realize that these pregnancies, perhaps from the 6th are not intended! Help them (Asap) with the idea of birth control as suggested by other posters. I hope his retirement benefit comes quickly and he acts wisely applying it to the family.

Then, make sure your academics do not suffer from all these distractions, because it is your sure asset for now. One extra year in school, or a poor result will definitely escalate the problem. Again, maintain a strong hold on, and unity with other siblings so that they do not become irresponsible and more headache to the limited fortunes of the family.

You are blessed.

2 Likes

Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by Abbey2sam(m): 8:13am On Jan 11, 2015
Rosarie:
did u miss the dad will soon retire part

so? Does it mean the father don't have any plan.....
and he's still giving birth.....

I'm also a firstborn, you have to take care of yourself before you can take cake of someone, be it parents or siblings.....


life is per head
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by SkinnyDude(m): 8:20am On Jan 11, 2015
virginboy1:
Eight years ago when I got the news that my mum was pregnant,I was devastated,while everybody were busy expressing the mantra "every child is a blessing".I wasn't happy because another child from a family of 7 will be coming to join this difficult society and as the first Issue of the Family I wasn't comfortable due to the unforseen burden I was going to carry.I pondered over it and got over it with time.

Fast Forward to this year 2015,I just got a news that my mom is pregnant again.
As the 1st child,I am really worried,perplexed and scared.Why?"Finance Responsibilities".

I wonder why many parent create burdens for the first child knownily and unknownily.Moreover,I am still a student.Am disappointed in my dad though.
Also,my mom is in her late 40s,I am afraid of her health,at times I do feel pity and sad for her whenever she walks with weakness and tiredness.

Please all expereinced and knowlegable nairalanders,I need your opinion,discretion,assertions and adviced on this issue please.Thank You.
see oh! i wish my mum could get pregnant again. atleast to give me a brother. bro, you don't know what you have.
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by kdfemi(m): 8:20am On Jan 11, 2015
Nigerians will always say sumtin stupid when instead of given d write advice. But u are old enough to tell the your, you have to make dem realise if if financially they can take care of these children and the financial bundle the have created on u in d future cos obviously when u get a job everybody would b looking up to you and I think is time for familu planning let dem go to a clinic
Re: He Is Not Comfortable About His Mum's Pregnancy by Abbey2sam(m): 8:20am On Jan 11, 2015
stanisbaratheon:



please be reasonable this is someone's life we're talking about here. Thanks

what happen to his life? The father is still training his a$$ to finish school.....let him finish first and see how the future unfold.....

he can contribute his own when the time comes, but it's not yet time, he has his studies to face, and if you ask me this an unnecessary distraction he's creating for himself

The father is still receiving salary, eventually it will be pension and gratuity. ...so he should worry less

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