₦airaland Forum

Trust me,I would tell my mum my findings because,the last thing I want is to see her hurt. It could be hoax but atleast,she would know what she's getting into. If she still decides to go into it,then its her decision and I'd respect that.

Tell your brother what you saw,what you think and you guys should have a serious talk with your mum. I wish to advice your mum to back out of the relationship now,that guy spells danger in all ramifications. He is an accident waiting to happen. All the best.

Things like this needs to be handle with maturity, will advice u seek the knowledge of an elderly man from your mother's side and relay it to him, he will know how to go about it better. My little one lobo suggestion

It's simple as abc...get yourself a camera, take pic of him and his lover and mail it to your mum and let your bro know what's up. Your mum will kick him to the curb and carry on with her life...do it, it will work for you.

seek GOD face for d solution

He shld kill d womaniser bcs no time to check time ooo dat womaniser most collect

kubrat:
Please look for a time when ur mum is in a good mood and tell her d story like it happened to someone else tell her to advise u.whatever advice she gives u will guide u further.

I have done this before and it worked extremely well.
It was a married man in my office who i had always assumed was a strong christian and so i had a lot of respect for him. Only for me to find out he was asking all the small babes in the office out and it was a joke amongst the babes. I was a bit embarrassed for him and wondered if i should have a word with him or not. Eventually applied this tactic , his reponse was if he were the individual he would want to know and he took my advise extremely well when i told him.

another off thread on nairaland...must we copy a story and paste it here?....have consider the fact that the original op isnt here to read pple's advice.

Nairaland is fast becoming a 'photocopy' forum and it is sad to think that seun and his mods are blindfolded by fake traffic that wont last.

I find it insultin or rather pokin your nose in the wrong hole. Your parents brought you to this world have all the wisdom and experience to handle relationships better than you. IT is advisable you do not interfere with there personal lives...you will be surprised your mom may be aware that her BF is seein other women but as long as he respects her and does not robb it in her face.Do you know how many marriages are standin on the pillar of extra marital affairs.Many couples are comfortable with it probably as a sighn of submission or for what ever reason! Dont interfer as long as it does have to do with anytin that is detrimental to her life,that her BF's cup will be filled oneday.

Yes she is your mother, but please respect her privacy. Do not be surprise she knows and she is keeping it away from you and your brother. When it comes to men issues women are very emotional.I no of some1 who made such report, at the end of the day the tables turned against her. Be content with the fact that your mum is happy, that's what is important. You cannot give her dat kind of happiness.

You have to talk to your mom. I'm assuming you're a she. Tell her that there's something you have really wanted to ask her. That you are grown up now (I'm assuming you are up to 18). That your friend in school discovered that her boyfriend is seeing another woman and she doesn't know how to handle the situation. Try to make the act convincing enough by bringing yourself into the picture. Tell that you've been wondering what would be the right thing to do if you were in your girlfriend's shoes. From her response, you'll know what your next move would be.

Tell your mum atleast for her to protect herself from STD n AIDS from a random man. Secondly if u don't tell her the man in question will feel u r wayward,certainly one day he will make advances.

DeCritique:
Tell your mum before it is too late.


To avoid further heart break which might lead to high bp. You didnt tell us what happened to ur dad. Dead or abandoned his responsibilities?

If it's the later, the heart break and the thoughts of "Two men doing this to me? Where did I go wrong?" can make her lose her life.

Be warned

so u no sabi wetin widow mean?

freecocoa:
Your mother is not a child and should know how to handle it, you should tell her what you know and let her decide what she wants to do.

Tenk you.......

But she must know the best way to open the can of worms up, because.......

dre11:
Your opinion about the whole stuff

You are asking whether you should tell your mother?? Of course she needs to know... You also need to tell that man to stop coming to your house. If your mama say she wan continue, leave her cos she is an adult...

EdedetM:
Tell your mum atleast for her to protect herself from STD n AIDS from a random man. Secondly if u don't tell her the man in question will feel u r wayward,certainly one day he will make advances.

How will she protect herself when she hasn't had any glimpse of the man cheating
Its the daughter that knows the man is cheating and not the woman in person.





At the emboldened I kinder agree

Dimples192:
I think she should ask subtle questions to find out where the relationship stands first because for all she knows this could be a friends with benefits situation. The man was just widowed so maybe he wants to play the field since he's raised his family. What I think is embarrassing is finding out from your daughter that you've been rejected. From how casual he acted when the daughter spotted him shows that he doesn't see his relationship with her mum as a serious thing so the only person who would be hurt is the mother. Let the old woman have her companionship and service. If it ends it should be her calling not her daughters. It's not the daughters business.

I would have agreed with your assumption on friends with benefit but I kinder disagree because she waited for some years before taking the step of going out.... After pressure from within the family and extended one. So this rules out the possibility of FWB because she could have started having that without no one pressing her on it.


From his casual look I have thesame feeling as you said at the emboldened............. but the daughter did see joy in her mother and the way her mood changes when she start going out with him.........



So, her mother is committed to it while the man might not be committed to it, so to save her mother the heartbreak in future [because I see one with his disregard for the relationship]..... She should tell her mum in a pleasant way.



So, it will be her mum that will decide on what she want and how she wanna play the game with all guilty off the daughter......

Fellonigerians:
You are asking whether you should tell your mother?? Of course she needs to know... You also need to tell that man to stop coming to your house. If your mama say she wan continue, leave her cos she is an adult...

Tenk you

Emary:
Use a story like "you saw your friend's father who is divorced but currently in a relationship with a woman you know from church picking up an aristo chick from your hostel". That way you'll sample her opinion and know if she'd want to know or not before telling her.

You mean the situation should be related to her in a virtual manner..... But, don't you think she would wise enough to pick up the pieces and joint it together and knows that you are talking about her relationship with his suppose man.




Remember she is vast in knowledge than you

RALPHOW:
HIV IS REAL
PLEASE TELL YOUR MOTHER
YOU DONT AND CAN NOT GET ANOTHER MOTHER
IF HE INFECT YOUR MOTHER WITH HIV,
HE WILL RUN AND U WILL SPEND YOUR LIFE TIME SAVINGS
TO TREAT YOUR MOTHER

This one of the best advice....... HIV is real

;DSIMPLE......DON'T TELL HER KILL THE MAN, KILL UR MUM AND FINALLY KILL URSELF.....WEN UNA REACH HELL SATAN GO JUDGE THE CASE....

DeCritique:
Sorry chic... I totally skipped jumped that area... Totally forgot it. Thanks for the corrections sweetie... Good to know that your brain is still intact. Hopefully, you are a GEJite right?

Because I know GEJites are the only set of supporters that still have their brains intact

Lol... GEJ till 2019

We had no choice but to like him because it is obvious that he is making our mother happy. I was however, surprised and unhappy when I began to see him in my school hostel with another younger lady

The emboldened kinder looks confusing because its like on the face value the lady didn't like the man until her mum says 'he is making her happy'

malbro:
;DSIMPLE......DON'T TELL HER KILL THE MAN, KILL UR MUM AND FINALLY KILL URSELF.....WEN UNA REACH HELL SATAN GO JUDGE THE CASE....

Which kind advice be this self

omotalkie:
Lol... GEJ till 2019

GEJ back to Otuoke by May2015

Islie:
Which kind advice be this self

ADVICE FROM THE HEART

My bro tell your mother in the most polite of ways do that before she decides to settle down with him. Cos the so called happiness would then evaporate completely and she would be worse than a wreck...

Reading the op, I picture myself going to see my nieces, cousins, friends and relatives in their hostels if I'm in their area.
Don't be misled by what ppl say.

About ten years ago, I had a cause to visit the town my best friend's sister was studying at, at least thrice a month, work related. And each time i visited her. Her boyfriend/fiancé was based abroad.

I'm sure some people who never knew her close enough would think she was my girlfriend.

Nigerians love speculation and rumour die. na wa o.

spiralwedge:
Reading the op, I picture myself going to see my nieces, cousins, friends and relatives in their hostels if I'm in their area.
Don't be misled by what ppl say.

About ten years ago, I had a cause to visit the town my best friend's sister was studying at, at least thrice a month, work related. And each time i visited her. Her boyfriend/fiancé was based abroad.

I'm sure some people who never knew her close enough would think she was my girlfriend.

Nigerians love speculation and rumour die. na wa o.

Which one is rumours there oooo