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How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl - Family - Nairaland

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How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by OlabodeTECH: 9:12pm On Oct 17, 2021
Hey guys!

I truly wish I could be anonymous with this funny but troubling challenge.... lol

My family recently moved to another part of the country and the kids changed school. We've all settled down but my daughter is yet to.

She's having a hard time making friends in her new school. She just started Primary class and daily complaint from her is that her peers call her 'a Baby' because she isn't chubby like them.

The other kids appear to be what Yorubas call "Agric"

Please note my daughter isn't skinny. She eats well and has a good stature/height for her age.

She is very confident, smart and outspoken but I feel scared she may start experiencing inferiority complexity at this tender age. No evidence of bullying though based on my discussions with her.

What can I do?

22 Likes

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Emarvel(m): 9:14pm On Oct 17, 2021
I actually don't have anything to contribute as per the topic.........
I'm equally here to learn from my fellow Nairalanders wealth of experiences.


BTW; first to comment.................

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by ecolime(m): 9:22pm On Oct 17, 2021


Lets wait for the elders of the house

2 Likes

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by joceey(m): 9:28pm On Oct 17, 2021
Just tell your daughter, how special she is and also having a very rare gift from GOD

81 Likes 3 Shares

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by chatinent: 9:34pm On Oct 17, 2021
With time, she will.


She needs family love more than classmate validation.

42 Likes 1 Share

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Mercychen(f): 9:35pm On Oct 17, 2021
You people should pump her with enough food because no amount of counseling will do the trick or make her feel better as long as she still looks "smallish" to them and is still being refered to as a baby.

Also remember she spends most part of the day with "them" than you. So, your counseling will only be effective for a few hours and wear off as soon as she gets to school and faces her mates again.

Adding some flesh is the only thing that can build her confidence in no time and make them stop calling her a baby.

3 Likes

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Sonnobax15(m): 9:37pm On Oct 17, 2021
cheesy
Very normal..with time everything will surely fall in place......

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Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by mariahAngel: 9:38pm On Oct 17, 2021
Mercychen:
You people should pump her with food.

13 Likes

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Davash222(m): 9:43pm On Oct 17, 2021
. She just started Primary class and daily complaint from her is that her peers call her 'a Baby' because she isn't chubby like them
She's 5 and she's a Baby.


If she's not comfortable with that, tell her to start calling them Orobo when next they call her a Baby.

136 Likes 5 Shares

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by mariahAngel: 9:44pm On Oct 17, 2021
Op, tell your daughter as often as possible that she’s beautiful and smart, and nothing anyone else says will matter to her.

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Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by OlabodeTECH: 9:46pm On Oct 17, 2021
Mercychen:
You people should pump her with food.
You mean force her to eat more than necessary?.. lol

We can't force feed her. Even when she was a baby and very picky, we were not successful with that. She eats well TBH.

21 Likes 1 Share

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Kobojunkie: 9:47pm On Oct 17, 2021
OlabodeTECH:
She is very confident, smart and outspoken but I feel scared she may start experiencing inferiority complexity at this tender age. No evidence of bullying though based on my discussions with her.

What can I do?
Show her images of 5-year Olds from other parts of the country and world and use this chance to teach her that people shouldn't be judged by their body size and mass. People are beautiful regardless of all that, she too. Tell her that her classmates and wrong and she is more mature and should simply ignore their taunts as childishness. undecided

43 Likes 2 Shares

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Mercychen(f): 9:49pm On Oct 17, 2021
OlabodeTECH:

You mean force her to eat more than necessary?.. lol

We can't force feed her. Even when she was a baby and very picky, we were not successful with that. She eats well TBH.


I mean like.. tweak her diet. Add more of fatty foods. Then reduce fiber-rich foods in her diet.

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Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Mercychen(f): 9:50pm On Oct 17, 2021
mariahAngel:



What's wrong with you?

1 Like

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Kobojunkie: 9:53pm On Oct 17, 2021
Mercychen:
I mean, like tweak her diet. Add more of fatty foods. Then reduce fiber contents in her diet.
So, instead of having the gal accept that her mates are wrong, you want her to be made fat to fit in? What a disgusting thing to suggest to be done to a 5-year old or anyone for that matter. undecided

84 Likes 6 Shares

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Kobojunkie: 9:54pm On Oct 17, 2021
OlabodeTECH:

You mean force her to eat more than necessary?.. lol

We can't force feed her. Even when she was a baby and very picky, we were not successful with that. She eats well TBH.
Why would you even consider feeding your child more food simply to have her fit in with the image of others? What next are you going to break her bones if she is teased of being taller than the other children or will you bleach her skin to fit in with other light-skinned kids? undecided

What the heck is this? undecided

34 Likes 1 Share

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by mariahAngel: 9:56pm On Oct 17, 2021
Mercychen:


What's wrong with you?

Nothing.

You’re a teacher right? How do you handle bullies?
Do you even notice them, or are you yourself the bully?

6 Likes

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Mercychen(f): 9:58pm On Oct 17, 2021
mariahAngel:


Nothing.

You’re a teacher right? How do you handle bullies?
Do you even notice them, or are you yourself the bully?

And what has my being a teacher got to do with this?
Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Kobojunkie: 10:00pm On Oct 17, 2021
Mercychen:
And what has my being a teacher got to do with this?
You are a teacher and you suggested a kid be fattened up to suit her teasers? undecided
That's disgusting! undecided

32 Likes 2 Shares

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by mariahAngel: 10:01pm On Oct 17, 2021
Mercychen:


And what has my being a teacher got to do with this?




If you as a teacher notice the kind of situation the op’s daughter is in, how will you handle it?

7 Likes

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by OlabodeTECH: 10:06pm On Oct 17, 2021
Kobojunkie:
Why would you even consider feeding your child more food simply to have her fit in with the image of others? What next are you going to break her bones if she is teased of being taller than the other children or will you bleach her skin to fit in with other light-skinned kids? undecided

What the heck is this? undecided
You probably misinterpreted my comment. To force-feed her is NEVER an option.

3 Likes

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Makschinchin: 10:06pm On Oct 17, 2021
Just keep telling her there's nothing wrong with her body size. Make her know always that she's beautiful the way she is and you as her parent love her so... If possible you should talk to her teacher about it so she can look into the matter and stop the other kids from making jest of her..

..My 2cents

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Mercychen(f): 10:08pm On Oct 17, 2021
mariahAngel:


If you as a teacher notice the kind of situation the op’s daughter is in, how will you handle it?

What exactly is your point because you've not made any sense as far as I'm concerned.

I'm a teacher, not her parents. The best I can do is warn her classmates to stop calling her that but that will not change how the girl feels because she's already lost her self-esteem and needs to regain her confidence back which requires practical solution ( feeding her fat) which only the parents can do and not the teacher!

What would counselling do for 5yr old by the way?

2 Likes

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Kobojunkie: 10:12pm On Oct 17, 2021
OlabodeTECH:

You probably misinterpreted my comment. To force-feed her is NEVER an option.
Nigeria, as a society, is the way it is even today because the foolish reign - it is everywhere you look - and wisdom is pretty much nowhere to be found. So if you cause your child to begin bowing to what the fools say now, you doom her to living a foolish existence for the rest of her life. undecided

Teach her to make choices regardless of what the foolish majority think, say or subscribe to. undecided

3 Likes

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by mariahAngel: 10:42pm On Oct 17, 2021
Mercychen:


What exactly is your point because you've not made any sense as far as I'm concerned.

I'm a teacher, not her parents. The best I can do is warn her classmates to stop calling her that but that will not change how the girl feels because she's already lost her self-esteem and needs to regain her confidence back which requires practical solution ( feeding her fat) which only the parents can do and not the teacher!

What would counselling do for 5yr old by the way?




Don’t worry. You’ll catch up.

9 Likes

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Mercychen(f): 10:44pm On Oct 17, 2021
mariahAngel:


Don’t worry. You’ll catch up.

1 Like

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by 1F30M4(f): 10:56pm On Oct 17, 2021
Our society is to be blamed for this, where on Earth did people get this "s/he doesn't eat well and that's why s/he is slim".. Please tell her that she's absolutely adorable the way she is... Yes they're chubby and all that but can they articulate things, are they smart, do they assimilate orrr they only know how to look down on other people, jeer at them and make them feel less... No be by fat jare, they're just spoilt brats..

Sending my love to your daughter.. 'Hey princess, keep doing amazing, don't let 'em dull your shine okay.. Keep your head up high, the sky is only but your stepping stone, they've got nothing on you!' smiley

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by greenie77: 4:40am On Oct 18, 2021
Mercychen:


What exactly is your point because you've not made any sense as far as I'm concerned.

I'm a teacher, not her parents. The best I can do is warn her classmates to stop calling her that but that will not change how the girl feels because she's already lost her self-esteem and needs to regain her confidence back which requires practical solution ( feeding her fat) which only the parents can do and not the teacher!

What would counselling do for 5yr old by the way?




Feeding her fat is not a practical solution in order to meet her peers' expectations. A teacher's role in such situation is to utilize it as learning moments for the children by creating fun activities around respecting body sizes.

17 Likes

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Stevenbright(m): 5:55am On Oct 18, 2021
OlabodeTECH:
Hey guys!

I truly wish I could be anonymous with this funny but troubling challenge.... lol

My family recently moved to another part of the country and the kids changed school. We've all settled down but my daughter is yet to.

She's having a hard time making friends in her new school. She just started Primary class and daily complaint from her is that her peers call her 'a Baby' because she isn't chubby like them.

The other kids appear to be what Yorubas call "Agric"

Please note my daughter isn't skinny. She eats well and has a good stature/height for her age.

She is very confident, smart and outspoken but I feel scared she may start experiencing inferiority complexity at this tender age. No evidence of bullying though based on my discussions with her.

What can I do?

Tell her to never listen to or take what people say about her seriously. Tell her people will always talk but she should always work with the reality in all situations!

1 Like

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Munzy14(m): 6:10am On Oct 18, 2021
OlabodeTECH:

You mean force her to eat more than necessary?.. lol

We can't force feed her. Even when she was a baby and very picky, we were not successful with that. She eats well TBH.

The best way to defend, is to attack..

If they call her baby, she should call them Orobo( orobo is what we call the 50cl bottle of Pepsi then) more like fat.

Or she can call them fatty bombom...The coded peer bully will die a natural death...grin

Peer influence is a big one for kids at that stage..It can mess up their psychology.

15 Likes 2 Shares

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by 3ple9ine(m): 6:28am On Oct 18, 2021
Mercychen:
You people should pump her with enough food because no amount of counseling will do the trick or make her feel better as long as she still looks "smallish" to them and is still being refered to as a baby.

Also remember she spends most part of the day with "them" than you. So, your counseling will only be effective for a few hours and wear off as soon as she gets to school and faces her mates again.

Adding some flesh is the only thing that can build her confidence in no time and make them stop calling her a baby.

Sorry to ask but what if after becoming fat she changes school
and at her new school she is called orobo, would you still ask for her to burn the fat?

23 Likes 2 Shares

Re: How To Counsel A 5 Year Old Girl by Mercychen(f): 6:38am On Oct 18, 2021
3ple9ine:


Sorry to ask but what if after becoming fat she changes school
and at her new school she is called orobo, would you still ask for her to burn the fat?

I'm not saying to make her "orobo" but a little change in her diet to help her grow a little in size and height to match her age. Not necessarily making her fat.

That is the only thing that will make the children naturally stop calling and seeing her as a baby. They are children for crying out loud, not adults. and they don't reason like we adults. They reason, learn and accept practical things better than mere words.

The op, understands what im getting at as a parent even if he doesn't admit it.

1 Like

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