₦airaland Forum

shirazlova:
Im a regular contributor here on Nairaland but have had to create a new profile for the sake of being anonymous

My problem is that all my life I've struggled to make or maintain female friendships due to one reason or another. Distance, change of location, falling out/unresolved conflict, jealousy, fake friends etc.. It's something I'm ashamed of and I often feel sad that I don't have my clique of friends especially now that I'm about getting married. It saddens me that at this time of my life where I'm supposed to be joyous and be surrounded by girlfriends helping me with wedding preparations, choosing a dress etc, I have no one to call on. I've had to shop for my dress alone which was quite a depressing experience. Everytime my parents or aunties ask of my friends I come up with one story or another or just change the topic completely.

My fiancée is very much aware of my lack of friends but he's not bothered by it at all. I'm in my early/mid twenties and I feel so saddened to see other girls my age with lots of girlfriends. I have a big family however most of my cousins are male.

How do I go about doing my wedding with no bridesmaids whatsoever! It'll be such a mortifying experience for my wedding guests and family members to notice I have no friends.
What do I do about this?
I'd appreciate matured responses pls.

You can have a wedding without bridesmaids just you two,maid of honor and best man,tell the family that is now you and your man want it
Does your man have female relatives?
The boys in your family,dem no get girlfriends?,borrow them
Your mama and aunties' friends no get daughters?
Alternatively go join a Church
There are many single girls that will be happy to strut their stuff
Or shall we start a bridesmaid campaign on nairaland
People may respond o

shirazlova:
Im a regular contributor here on Nairaland but have had to create a new profile for the sake of being anonymous
My problem is that all my life I've struggled to make or maintain female friendships due to one reason or another. Distance, change of location, falling out/unresolved conflict, jealousy, fake friends etc.. It's something I'm ashamed of and I often feel sad that I don't have my clique of friends especially now that I'm about getting married. It saddens me that at this time of my life where I'm supposed to be joyous and be surrounded by girlfriends helping me with wedding preparations, choosing a dress etc, I have no one to call on. I've had to shop for my dress alone which was quite a depressing experience. Everytime my parents or aunties ask of my friends I come up with one story or another or just change the topic completely.
My fiancée is very much aware of my lack of friends but he's not bothered by it at all. I'm in my early/mid twenties and I feel so saddened to see other girls my age with lots of girlfriends. I have a big family however most of my cousins are male.
How do I go about doing my wedding with no bridesmaids whatsoever! It'll be such a mortifying experience for my wedding guests and family members to notice I have no friends.
What do I do about this?
I'd appreciate matured responses pls.

Your HTB's cousins , his nieces & sisters, yours join and your 9yr old lil cutie sister will be a perfect chief bridesmaid, thank me later with a bottle of Shiraz

You're too blessed to be stressed. Stop looking for trouble.

If I had no friends,I wouldn't bother having bridesmaids. Infact eh! If I could wed my husband again,I won't have bridesmaids.

Some of my bridesmaids stressed me ...I had to bother about their accomodation, picked them up from airport/park, took care of their food.. Then they didn't bother helping out with jack. Abegie@bridesmaids.

Feranchek:
If only you posted with your main ID, I'm sure there are lotta people that'll be ELATED to be your bridesmaid. Nairaland is really a great family especially if you're frequent here like you said. I've met a couple of INTERESTING dudes and chics. Lest I forget HML!!

Spot on...

Or better still why not a little wedding with only the maid of honour abi how una de call am.

Use ur wife friend

How much did nwobodo stole ? is it enough to buy peejeau ?

Shirazlova....Ishilove

shirazlova:
Im a regular contributor here on Nairaland but have had to create a new profile for the sake of being anonymous

My problem is that all my life I've struggled to make or maintain female friendships due to one reason or another. Distance, change of location, falling out/unresolved conflict, jealousy, fake friends etc.. It's something I'm ashamed of and I often feel sad that I don't have my clique of friends especially now that I'm about getting married. It saddens me that at this time of my life where I'm supposed to be joyous and be surrounded by girlfriends helping me with wedding preparations, choosing a dress etc, I have no one to call on. I've had to shop for my dress alone which was quite a depressing experience. Everytime my parents or aunties ask of my friends I come up with one story or another or just change the topic completely.

My fiancée is very much aware of my lack of friends but he's not bothered by it at all. I'm in my early/mid twenties and I feel so saddened to see other girls my age with lots of girlfriends. I have a big family however most of my cousins are male.

How do I go about doing my wedding with no bridesmaids whatsoever! It'll be such a mortifying experience for my wedding guests and family members to notice I have no friends.
What do I do about this?
I'd appreciate matured responses pls.

use ur church member.incase you need a photographer .call 08030848527

To find bridesmaid in naija na small thing.

Just advertise it here on nairaland and add your phone number. Bbm pin or pphone number, trust me you go see bridesmaids tire.

I will be ur friend!

Nairalanders have been magnanimous to give you ladies at almost free of charge. I hope with most of this advice give above. Your concern should have been solved except you are working on a very slim budget.

There is this company named "Bestman Incorporated" that let acute workaholics and people without male friends to hire bestmen.. So, she should go and hire bridal-train and ashoebis

What about your Church

No plus, thr must b minus. Tell exs to lend u dia gurls.

I really understand ur feeling dat no female friends to assist or cheer u up. I would have volunteer to be ur bridemaid if am a female.
However i hav beautiful nieces and their friends who will be willing to help and make ur day colourful. if u need them let know.

Its not by force to have maids for your wedding. Without proper planning and coordination, most of those girls end up unhappy and punish you by frowning in your pictures. I have a friend that this happened to. You may even wish you never had them in the first place. The wedding will still hold with or without maids. Just set your priorities right and you will be fine. I had bridesmaids at my wedding but that was because I had willing ladies that were eager to be my bridesmaids, otherwise I wouldn't have bothered.

But if you still insist, look for much younger friends, younger cousins, or church members that are fond of you. However, make sure they can pay up for their clothes on time. You don't want to run into debt because of a wedding.

All in all, try not to stress yourself over it, you need to save your energy for other important things after the wedding

Having friends is snot compulsory,what's more impotant is having a real friend..not the numeous backstabbers in town naw..just find one or two and move on...as to your problem..just talk to your family and fiancee..they will find someone for you....I like that your fiancee..he is not worried at all...that's why guys will be guys...we don't let petty things disturb us

Its not compulsory to use bridesmaids, you and your fiance can skip bridesmaids and grooms men but if you feel you want to, you could use family relatives.

I totally understand with you, I dnt do the friends thing either, I dnt have the patience for girls and drama and prefer keeping to myself. On my wedding, my husband and I skipped the bridesmaids/groomsmen, instead my younger sisters friends and classmates dressed up in their aso ebi, danced and ushered us in. It was different but good all the same.

You don't have to kill your self with worry, just find a way to make it work in your own way. Congrats and wishing you an awesome married life.

Isnt compulsory to have bridesmaids dear. Your wedding can go very well without them..my two elder sisters who are married never had any its not like they don't have
friends. They just didnt feel like having bridesmaids.

Why are you worrying yourself? Are you not have any sister in your family? Infact nowadays, people don't look for best friend when they have sisters in their families.

bobbyluis:
if u have one female cousin or any female close that can fit into ur bridal train,tell her to invite her friends over(if she has any),that way u can make and tell them abt ur wedding
Or
get ur male cousins to bring their girlfriends 4 u

Exactly my thought. U can also use ur husband's female relatives.

Enypie:
We could start by saying ''Hi''
Well,i loving making new friends...

Nice one. I luv ppl like u

Re u on whatsapp or bbm ?

The wedding Ringer comes to mind. And to think while watching the movie I said this can never happen in 9ja...everyone has lots of friends and family. Well, I guess I was wrong...I should open a bridesmaid agency like kevin hart

Its even out of fashion why wory urself.Get a chief bridesmaid and bestman off u go.
But if u care and hell bent rent some. HmL

Order friends from jumia.

At list ur husband has female friends ,you have relations . That would do the job

You could get your event planner to supply you posh girls. Won't cost you more than 15-20k each and they come with same dresses of your choice. There really is no cause for stress.

You no dey go church ?

Rally round some church members and make them your brides maid. You can pick from the choristers, Usher etc.

And you definitely do have some close facebook friends, from your old school. Get them together.

shirazlova:
Im a regular contributor here on Nairaland but have had to create a new profile for the sake of being anonymous

My problem is that all my life I've struggled to make or maintain female friendships due to one reason or another. Distance, change of location, falling out/unresolved conflict, jealousy, fake friends etc.. It's something I'm ashamed of and I often feel sad that I don't have my clique of friends especially now that I'm about getting married. It saddens me that at this time of my life where I'm supposed to be joyous and be surrounded by girlfriends helping me with wedding preparations, choosing a dress etc, I have no one to call on. I've had to shop for my dress alone which was quite a depressing experience. Everytime my parents or aunties ask of my friends I come up with one story or another or just change the topic completely.

My fiancée is very much aware of my lack of friends but he's not bothered by it at all. I'm in my early/mid twenties and I feel so saddened to see other girls my age with lots of girlfriends. I have a big family however most of my cousins are male.

How do I go about doing my wedding with no bridesmaids whatsoever! It'll be such a mortifying experience for my wedding guests and family members to notice I have no friends.
What do I do about this?
I'd appreciate matured responses pls.

i perceive missclasssy's writing.

sassygal:
Hi,

Its not compulsory you use your friends as bridesmaid on your wedding day, but if you want a large bridal party, you could ask neighbours or even rent bridesmaid. You necessarily dont
have to pay them, just take care of their essentials - dress, hair, makeup, transport. I did that for a client once, could do that if you want. I simply used my ushers.

You shouldn't be ashamed of being friendless, in the long run, it will pay you. Less drama! Otherwise join a church group.

Great advice.

go gather maami water na plus all your enemies. university of okponsu!!! that isolated life of yours

come my school come carry winch do bridemaids

Equalizer:
don't you have friends? or even relations like niece or cousins?... I heard they hire ashebis online too.. try Oxl or Jumia first..

Oxl again pls don't try it oo! Those ashebis from Olx might end up kidnapping you and ur groom on your wedding day. I don't trust anything from that scam site!

I actually think it's admirable that you don't have female friends. It shows you are real and not down with drama.
Getting bridesmaids shouldn't be too difficult. You have a family I hope and besides that some girls would gladly jump at the opportunity.