₦airaland Forum

Moana:
I never lend money to people when i know there is no security to gurantee payment.
A best friend can turn into a stranger when money is involved.

I learned this lesson firsthand and in a hard way....

Mzdeee, I sight you

missKiffy:
My own opinion is never to borrow anybody money, what you should rather do is to give, if for instance someone wants to borrow 50,000, Jst give d person about 5k or 10k or more if you can and let the person know you are giving him and not borrowing him and source for the rest. Rather than borrowing him and he will be giving you stories

better

Adesiji77:
I learned this lesson firsthand and in a hard way

me too

I've had two experiences, and I learnt my lessons the hard way.. Money, gone, and there was never a refund..

Hence, I don't give out what I can't forfeit/forget..

adonismuller:
lol, I use to think I am being wicked o

you are only looking after yourself

Have lend friends money in the past and they have refused to pay me, there is one of our 5 yrs 25k till now na story it got to a stage he stopped picking my calls. One thing have learnt lend only your colleagues in the office so that if the person refuses you table the issue officially, even if the person dies the death benefit can provide your moneyand have a written document incase, even before I give I will warn you that am shirlock who is ready to cut a pound of flesh.

Never lend money to people. If they ask for 100 thousand. Dash them 5k. If they ask for 20k dash them 1000 naira. Tell them that is all u have. Look for excuse. Never ever borrow money to anybody. The hand debtor they use collect money no be d same hand dey go use pay am! Never ever lend anybody money. Never ever. Ever ever ever. EVER


Sorry for the repetition. I have had a bitter experience.

Moana:
me too

People that are perceived to be "tender-hearted" are usually targets of this, especially when they know that you are easily swayed by the entreaties of others.

I used to have this weakness: saying "No" to a someone that is asking for monetary assistance from me for the first time especially when it is within my reach.

I have since outgrown this after having recurring bad debtors

magaliyu:
What Is The Solution For Retrieving A Loan From Your Inlaw And You Dont Want To Spoil Your Relationship.

Same idea that everyone has been sharing: Don't give out what you cant stand to lose. You may have saved a family relationship for the sake of considering the money a "donation" or you could jeopardize it by getting the money back any way possible. Most people go with the former.

I don't have a hard time lying to a begging relative. It's not the most righteous method, but if the begging relative receives any hint that there's a slight chance they can get the money they'll remain persistent. A simple "I dont have that kind of money" dashes any lingering hope they had in me. A tip for the future

nerodenero:
I don't lend people money as such. I let out money that I know if it doesn't come back or I don't get paid back, I won't feel bad. That is the logic I use and I have not regretted doing such.

Very true, I learnt it from Mum.
Don't give it out if you can't bear the thought of not getting it back otherwise a firm no will suffice

I have a similar situation. A friend at home in Nigeria told me tale how he survives from church and how his bus is in bad condition and as such he couldn't use it to work. After thinking it over, I had two options: just dash him 10k or voluntarily lend him all the money he needed to repair the car. But since dashing him money although would made me feel I have helped my friend, I decided that the best way to help him is to teach him how to fish, rather than giving him fish. So, I asked him how much is needed to repair it. He replied it is 70k I then told him I will lend him 60k and give him 10k as my own personal free contribution. We talked of how he can pay back by December, something like paying a weekly amount into my bank account.
A few weeks later, he send me a message saying the bus have problem and he is returning it to the mechanic. Then nothing again was heard from him. I was expecting him to brief me on the progress of the repair but nothing. I then sent him message asking how far with the repair but he would keep telling me he would email me. December came and nothing from him. I got tired.
I might just start dashing friends who want to borrow from me money. But I have this philosophy, teach a friend how to fish and not just give him a crumb of fish. Unfortunately, it seems some friends try to exploit this. If any friend come to me to borrow money I will still lend him but male sure that what he wants to do is feasible. It is always joyous knowing one helps a friend start making a living or overcoming some problem.

God bless u @op for this post. I just recently collected a loan borrowed sm1 since last year mid Sept. Infact I don't want to go into details but it had to get messy for me to be able to get dat money bak. I don't also evn want to talk abt d person too cos mere thot of it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. Pls never grant a favor esp favors lik money lending wen u ddnt get enof info. I regret takin dat action to dis day,dats all I can say because it cost me a lot. I made up my mind never to borrow anybody money again o evn na 500 naira evnn my blood relations except o knw say I go see wetin to cover up for,lol!
Pple are ungrateful o,dey take you for granted jo,capitalising on ur weakness,afta all u can't do anytin dey will say.

For me, I don't lend people money, its better u die say I no give u , than for me to dey regret, I will never go to hell because I no borrow u money 'cos its not by force, I don't care if na him go kill u, everybody go sha die someday so u are not the first,
I no wicked, I just don learn lesson from my childhood friend wey dey London since,he never born pikin when he owe me, but his pikin don reach 6yrs old and na story he still dey tell me till today.
U
Know the worse part, he dey pay house rent,feed himself and his family in London,he pay water bill, waste bill,electricity bill,pay chidren school fees, we all know how London be and the animal no fit pay my £300 since 2009,
E no go better for u james owunna, God go punish u

Where are the debtors?? Na only lenders d comment since.

kennygee:
I have a policy.

Never lend money to people.

Rather, assist them with the little you have for free.

Gbam!

hahn:
Exactly.

Another way is, when you notice the person doesn't want to pay, don't mention about it for a while probably 2-5months. Humans tend to forget their mistakes and you can take advantage by asking for a loan of the same amount.

When the person asks you to pay back, you can remind hin/her of their previous debt

LOL

They usually go from 'please help me' to 'ordinary 10k na him you dey stress me like this'. I think it's a Nigerian trait. Most Nigerians find it really difficult to offset their debts.

I have a policy not give what I cannot bear.
A friend borrowed 500k and promised to pay back in one week. 8months no response.
Advice me please.

EggovinMma:


Very easy for me.I don't lend,I 'dash'
Friend;Babe can you lend me 20k?will pay next week.
Me;20k?babe I don't have that kind of money,but I fit dash you 5k Wey I get currently,go and hustle for the rest.

Better,I dash than calling begging and arguing over 20k payment that may come in small small bashes.


Na that time you go hear bullshitts like "na because of 20k?"

Where have u been?
Abi u follow for people wey de trek round the country?

Youem:
I have a policy not give what I cannot bear.
A friend borrowed 500k and promised to pay back in one week. 8months no response.
Advice me please.

Go and jump inside lagoon

ceejay80s:
For me, I don't lend people money, its better u die say I no give u , than for me to dey regret, I will never go to hell because I no borrow u money 'cos its not by force, I don't care if na him go kill u, everybody go sha die someday so u are not the first,
I no wicked, I just don learn lesson from my childhood friend wey dey London since,he never born pikin when he owe me, but his pikin don reach 6yrs old and na story he still dey tell me till today.
U
Know the worse part, he dey pay house rent,feed himself and his family in London,he pay water bill, waste bill,electricity bill,pay chidren school fees, we all know how London be and the animal no fit pay my £300 since 2009,
E no go better for u james, God go punish u

ceejay80s:
For me, I don't lend people money, its better u die say I no give u , than for me to dey regret, I will never go to hell because I no borrow u money 'cos its not by force, I don't care if na him go kill u, everybody go sha die someday so u are not the first,
I no wicked, I just don learn lesson from my childhood friend wey dey London since,he never born pikin when he owe me, but his pikin don reach 6yrs old and na story he still dey tell me till today.
U
Know the worse part, he dey pay house rent,feed himself and his family in London,he pay water bill, waste bill,electricity bill,pay chidren school fees, we all know how London be and the animal no fit pay my £300 since 2009,
E no go better for u james, God go punish u

Some people are bad debtors......anyone can be 'broke'.....but not paying a debt is d worst thing one can do. U see a debtor buying new phones,yet wnt pay his/her debt

As for me, I have learnt my lessons with close friends. Hence, I have resolved not to lend money again. I also learnt from my dad how some close friends refused to pay him close to 6 million.

My strategy is this, if you come close to me and I really see that you are in need of the money, I don't lend you. If you ask me to borrow you 100k, the best I can do is to dash you 10-15k depending on how free I am with cash that period. I will give u the little I can part with, without return. But borrow, no way.

WHEN YOU LEND MONEY TO YOUR, YOU LOSS TWO THINGS, YOUR FRIENDSHIP AND MONEY. BUT IF YOU REFUSE TO LEND, YOU WILL ONLY LOSS ONE THING, YOUR FRIENDSHIP.

Don't lend money to friends if you expect a payback on time. It can strain your friendship.

According to Richest Man in Babylon"Don't lend out any money indiscriminately or else u re pretty sure dt the person in question is capable of paying back in order to avoid losing ur hard earn money"...

Goodnuel:
Where are the debtors?? Na only lenders d comment since.

Exactly my thought

wrong advice. Please try again later.

when you say NO to a begging relative:

The worst set of people to loan money to are family, friends, colleagues and sexual partner because they all have a false sense of entitlement to your money, so the need to really pay back is not there.

Unfortunately, if you also fail to assist in their time of need, society term you as wicked so the cycle keeps on going.

My rule: I will never loan you money I can't dash you.