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Apparently, intellectuals do not find dumb jokes hilarious
or interesting (or perhaps that is just what they say and
don’t mean). But what about the not so intellectual ones? If
you are one of the non-intellectuals but totally get the jokes
of the big brains, then great enough. But if you don’t, then
good luck figuring out the logic hidden in the following listed
jokes of the smarties.


These may have you scratch your head a little but once you
figure the joke,you will laugh


(1)
How can you tell the difference between a
chemist and a plumber?
Ask them to pronounce “unionized.”










N.B. A plumber would say- ‘you-niun-ized’ ,whereas a chemist
would say- ‘un-ayon-ized’. Gettit? Gettit??

(2) Helium walks into a bar, The bar tender says “We don’t serve noble gases in here.” Helium doesn’t react.

(3) Two chemists go into a restaurant. The first one says “I think I’ll have an H2O.” The second one says “I think I’ll have an H2O too”






N.B. the second one asked for H2O2 which is hydrogen peroxide

I hope u say 19

(4) What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium? “HeHe”

(5)
As I said before, I never repeat myself.

okpamson15:
I hope u say 19

I will stop at 19..just keep calm

(6) A hyperbole is an exaggerated claim. No, really, realllllllllllyyyyy exaggerated. I mean, like, the most exaggerated thing in the history of ever!!

WEIRDPC:
I will stop at 19..just keep calm

following

I studied chemistry, I understand u wella. Fire on......

@OP, ur first 4 jokes would only be understood by people who've got a background in science and chemistry in particular... Does dat make a non-science oriented individual an unintellectual person??

Apart from 1, i get the remaining

WEIRDPC:
(4)
What did the scientist say when he found
2 isotopes of helium?
“HeHe”

Those who are always 'heheheing' must have had doses of helium

WEIRDPC:
(5)
As I said before, I never repeat myself.

Of course, but you said that before the before

WEIRDPC:
(6)
A hyperbole is an exaggerated claim. No,
really, realllllllllllyyyyy exaggerated. I mean,
like, the most exaggerated thing in the
history of ever!!

Hehe...oops!

Koolmexxi:
@OP, ur first 4 jokes would only be understood by people who've got a background in science and chemistry in particular... Does dat make a non-science oriented individual an unintellectual person??

No, everyone has a field of study.

(7) I would make another chemistry joke but all good ones ARGON!

(8
The statement below is true. The
statement above is false

(9) . I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium got together and I was like.. ..”OMg”

(10) There’s a band called 1023MB. They haven’t had any gigs yet though

following sha

Enoquin:
Apart from 1, i get the remaining Those who are always 'heheheing' must have had doses of helium


Of course, but you said that before the before


Hehe...oops!

A plumber would say- ‘you-niun-ized’ ,whereas a chemist would say- ‘un-ayon-ized’ (un-ionized) . Gettit? Gettit??

(11) A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martinus. “You mean a martini?” the bartender asks. The Roman replies, “If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!”

(11) A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martinus. “You mean a martini?” the bartender asks. The Roman replies, “If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!”

WEIRDPC:
A plumber would say- ‘you-niun-ized’ ,whereas a
chemist
would say- ‘un-ayon-ized’ (un-ionized) . Gettit? Gettit??

ions...gorrit!

WEIRDPC:
(7) I would make another chemistry joke but all good ones ARGON!

I love this

WEIRDPC:
No, everyone has a field of study.

Good.. So why d

WEIRDPC:
Apparently, intellectuals do not find dumb jokes hilarious
or interesting (or perhaps that is just what they say and
don’t mean). But what about the not so intellectual ones? If
you are one of the non-intellectuals but totally get the jokes
of the big brains, then great enough. But if you don’t, then
good luck figuring out the logic

Cos u expect anyone to get a science based joke and whoever doesn't is simply an untellectual....

Gawd these jokes are dry intellectual or no intellectual. I feel like shooting u op.

misleading thread title. should be "19 chemistry jokes for science students only"

(12) A linguistics professor says during a lecture that, “In English, a double negative forms a positive. But in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, in no language in the world can a double positive form a negative.” But then a voice from the back of the room piped up, “Yeah, right.”

(13) I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence. There’s a knob called brightness, but it doesn’t work!

(14) A Buddhist monk approaches a burger food-truck and says “make me one with everything.” The Buddhist monk pays with a $20 bill, which the vendor takes, puts in his cash box, and closes the lid. “Where’s my change?” the monk asks. The vendor replies, “change comes from within.”

following