₦airaland Forum

babygirlfl:
With all respect to all my bible believing friends and with no offence intended from me too, I totally agree with this.

Have you heard of hell fire?

freecocoa:
You are right, although the way I see it, there won't be room for submitting in my marriage, the point being that, I believe a man who loves you, will not want you to give into his wish without considering if it okay with you or not, which is what submission is all about.

I still strongly believe, the right word is compromise.

LOL.

Elementary knowledge of marriage is your parlance.

When you get into marriage, This fantasy of yours will be demystified then you'll either choose to be submissive, sacrifice or walk away.

There are no Angelic man baby. They're still yet human and still function in their earthly ideal.

Phema:


Have you heard of hell fire?

lol

Phema:
@GHoJes

Nice perspective.

The question remains; is a woman's unsubmissiveness pardonable by God if her husband does not love her as God commanded, biblically? Must there be an incentive before a woman wholeheartedly submits to her husband?

Remember we are looking at this from God's standards.

Sin is only pardonable by God and the yardstick he use for measuring is not for you and me to know. I know you must have seen two people commit same sin in your sight but paid differently by God. That part of the scripture is a very wise one which people overlook or abuse to their advantage. I think it must have ensued from men screaming submission without loving hence they gave them their needed submission with an attache because it is unlikely to find a loved woman not submitting. A man who does not love his wife christlikely (sinner) as no right to acuse his woman that doesnt submit (sinner) like the halot and the scribe cases in the bible.
A woman who disobey God in one or more levels and submit in all things to her husband is not better than a woman who does not submit at all to her man before God. My dear, the truth of the matter is, it is the holy spirit that can make anybody to submit to God or man the God's way. For sins that are not spelt outrightly in the bible like failure to submit in a particular thing that you feel is not right with God, the holy spirit will convict you. If you feel guilty it is sin from you but the spirit may not convict another in same shoe. Like paul said about those who eat idol meat and feel guilty, it is sin to them but it is not sin to those who eat it without feeling guilt. The conclusion of the matter is that you have no authority to lift that part of the bible for use without practising the rest lest the devil tell you paul i know, who are you?

There must not be incentive before submission, that is why the bible tell christain to marry only christains unless before the person became a christain so that there will be no issue with loving and submitting. Christain here mean practising one.

freshvine:
LOL.

Elementary knowledge of marriage is your parlance.

When you get into marriage, This fantasy of yours will be demystified then you'll either choose to be submissive, sacrifice or walk away.

There are no Angelic man baby. They're still yet human and still function in their earthly ideal.

Luckily for me, you won't be the one I'll marry, if you think every man behaves like your husband or the men you know, then think again.

GHoJes:
Sin is only pardonable by God and the yardstick he use for measuring is not for you and me to know. I know you must have seen two people commit same sin in your sight but paid differently by God. That part of the scripture is a very wise one which people overlook or abuse to their advantage. I think it must have ensued from men screaming submission without loving hence they gave them their needed submission with an attache because it is unlikely to find a loved woman not submitting. A man who does not love his wife christlikely (sinner) as no right to acuse his woman that doesnt submit (sinner) like the halot and the scribe cases in the bible.
A woman who disobey God in one or more levels and submit in all things to her husband is not better than a woman who does not submit at all to her man before God. My dear, the truth of the matter is, it is the holy spirit that can make anybody to submit to God or man the God's way. For sins that are not spelt outrightly in the bible like failure to submit in a particular thing that you feel is not right with God, the holy spirit will convict you. If you feel guilty it is sin from you but the spirit may not convict another in same shoe. Like paul said about those who eat idol meat and feel guilty, it is sin to them but it is not sin to those who eat it without feeling guilt. The conclusion of the matter is that you have no authority to lift that part of the bible for use without practising the rest lest the devil tell you paul i know, who are you?

There must not be incentive before submission, that is why the bible tell christain to marry only christains unless before the person became a christain so that there will be no issue with loving and submitting. Christain here mean practising one.

You have restored my faith in Christians. Thank you for this. Thank you so much.

This is awesome. A thread in Family section that is sane. We need to keep a lot of people out more often

Submission got abused, which is why women struggle with it. I naturally respect some people because of what they are, not because they're male or older.

@ GHoJes

Why do typical christians make everything about the bible and christianity as a whole, so complicated?

Now, holy spirit has to direct me to submit to my husband? But it's clearly written in the bible na. We know God's standards. We know what He wants us to do. Not doing them is a sin. Whether or not He decides to pardon us is His prerogative. That does not remove that fact that we sinned. He says submit in all things, if you don't, it is a sin. Bringing the "man must love his wife" isn't a condition. It invariably means, whther or not your husband loves you, submit.

There is no need to over analyse this issue. We all know what is expected of us. We either do them or agree we are not obeying God.

freecocoa:
Lol, hell fire go be your case o, coco repent.

I'm thinking about it

Onegai:
You have restored my faith in Christians. Thank you for this. Thank you so much.

Thank you too. To God be the glory. I pray that that God will give me more knowledge of his revelation and utterances for times like this.
It is people who dont know the seriousness in the reverencing of God or how powerful he is that says anything from their mouth. When a person does not understand certain things about God, he should voice out in fear of God that he may open the eyes of his understanding. The truth is as long as this earth remains we cant understand it as paul said we know in part now but God reveal mistery on certain things sometimes even paul begged for more though he cant know it all.
My dear some people understanding has been blocked so that though seeing they cant really see. When i see some things i only hope and pray that some people i'm seeing does not belong to the category. It is only God that can make anyone to know him. If anyone like, let him study and know all literally, he cant know unless God permit, that is why he give grace to the humble.

freshvine:
After Reality 101, Chucky234 you are still single on nairaland giving them transport fare as the come and go.

Just as expected.

If that's your attempt at an insult, you should try harder.

freecocoa:
Just as expected.

If that's your attempt at an insult, you should try harder.

I thought you started it by calling out my dear shinning armor, the husband of a good hardworking wife who knows her place in a Christian home.

Phema:
Nice thread. But again, you are not defining submission in marriage according to the Bible.

The Bible says "wives submit to your husbands in all things". This means that you MUST do your husband's bidding ALWAYS, even when it really doesn't make sense.

And no. A husband and wife are not equal, biblically. You donot submit "in all things" to someone you are equal to. The way I see it, one is either a christian who lives by the Bible or an athiest/non practising christian who lives by common sense. No middle grounds. A real christian woman must submit to her husband always, hence not equal to him.

Now, my question is; what if my husband wants me to do something that is obviously a sin? At what point does one say no to submission without going against God's word?

Thanks

@Question: You submit to your husband as the Church submits to Christ I.e. you cannot go outside the will of God.

Read up Ananias and Saphirra's story in Acts 5.

Look up the definition of love in 1 Cor 13

shaybebaby:
No, it means you are manipulative.

Exactly my thoughts on this control from behind thing

Phema:
@ GHoJes

Why do typical christians make everything about the bible and christianity as a whole, so complicated?

Now, holy spirit has to direct me to submit to my husband? But it's clearly written in the bible na. We know God's standards. We know what He wants us to do. Not doing them is a sin. Whether or not He decides to pardon us is His prerogative. That does not remove that fact that we sinned. He says submit in all things, if you don't, it is a sin. Bringing the "man must love his wife" isn't a condition. It invariably means, whther or not your husband loves you, submit.

There is no need to over analyse this issue. We all know what is expected of us. We either do them or agree we are not obeying God.

I had to bring the holyspirit to tell you that it is only him that can make you do things the God's way not just because you like to do them. It is easy for one to become a born again but it aint easy to remain a born again even if the person want to. You know there are some godly virtues you want to keep but you cant that your flesh is weak. If you like put all your effort to such thing, it is only a matter of time you go back to where you started or continues with serious struggle to no good yield. It is the spirit that can make it light and help you it easily. Without being too spiritual, i tell you it is same spirit that can make you understand what i'm saying.
There are levels of submission, it is not just the basics.
Submission does not mean literally all things otherwise if your man says sleep with his boss for money and you disobey, you have not sinned. Your first and supreme submission is to God, anything short of his commands to you is the sin. Do you know of a young prophet God told to do something in the bible but an older experienced prophet came and told him otherwise, in submission he obeyed the prophet instead and paid by losing his life because he submitted to prophet more than God as the rule was for him to submit to the prophet.
That submission took cognisance of the woman's safety in that the man who submit to God can't demand ungodly submission from is wife.

MarvellousGod:
This submission thingy doesn't bother me. He treats me fine and I treat him fine too.. we're both happy, that's all that matters to me....

I can't say if I'm submissive or not because my opinions count so much in our relationship but he's ok with it. He allows me make so many decisions. .

I aim to make him happy and he does same, that's all... You should know what your spouse wants. You can't marry a traditional man and expect him not to act like a 'boss', in this case you just have to give in except you want trouble in your home. That's what you signed up for, you should have quit during courtship. .

Bottom line: you know your spouse and what pleases him/her, just do it.. that's all....

Also, if you've been 'submitting' to your husband/wife and both of you are fine with it, please continue.. Both of you alone know how best to run your home.. as long as everyone is happy, I see no qualms....

Very nice post.

This thread was just to address an issue.

shaybebaby:
Don't know why but everytime I see that word "submission", my brain refuses to process it. It is does not equate to love when it is demanded.
Also, trying to ascribe a different meaning to it biblically wont work because we all know that according to the times when those texts were written, it was a much more patriarichal society where women were seen as being less to men. Hence freecocoa is correct in the dynamics required for submission to take place..superior (men) and inferior ( women) according to the book.
A sense of self worth is required in a healthy partnership, submission negates that. How can you reject poo if it thrown at you and submit at the same time?

A husband should not be throwing poo in the first place.

Phema:
Now, that is common sense.

You are not serious

cococandy:
The same way my husband would be disobeying god if he doesn't honor me. If he does honor me, we wouldn't have reason to be at odds because I'll have a place of honor in my home and not the place of an inferior partner.

Theres a reason why both parties have to keep their part of the commandments.

People need to focus some more on what husbands are commanded to do. Wives have heard theirs over and over it has become so stale.

Phema, this thread seems so because I didn't discuss husbands

Coco has said it...

Men are to honor and love their wives...

Coco no vex, the thread was for a reason.

freshvine:
I thought you started it by calling out my dear shinning armor, the husband of a good hardworking wife who knows her place in a Christian home.

Really? I started it? when you are the one who said I know next to nothing about marriage, talking about how men function like you are the one incharge of their operating manual, smh.

And to even think that of all things to take a jab at me with, you decided to go with my being single, after Reality 101 and Chuky, like they and I actually have anything you know of, you are indeed the perfect woman.

limamintruth:
lol
The Biblical submission doesnt mean being unequal. Remember the same Bible regards marriage as a legal union where two separate individuals(male&female) become one indivisible body.
How then can there be inequality after the couple have become one body?

As someone said earlier, each spouse has a special role to play that is neither greater/better nor less important than that of the other spouse. They are to work as a team, and not as rivals or competitors (just as the head cannot rival the hand, same way the neck cannot be competing with the stomach).

Sorry for barging in anyways since the O.P clearly pointed out that this thread is for feminists only.




I very much agree with you except the 'the man being the boss thingy'.

Biblically, being the Head does not automatically translate to being 'the boss' as you put it.

Remember Jesus Himself explained that the greatest among you should be the servant of all.
Hence, being the Head is about being the servant of all, because as the head of your family, you are expected to make lots of sacrifices for your family(the same way Christ Jesus served the church and gave His life for her - the supreme sacrifice).

Therefore, being the boss is totally out of the question. Mutual respect is what is required.




Sorry but this opinion of yours is more cultural than biblical.


Once again, apologies to the O.P for barging into her feminazi thread.

Thanks a lot and apologies NOT accepted.

Two green cocks, one yellow goat, the third eye of a lion and the tusk of an elephant pregnant with triples

And all will be well again.

mutter:
A wise woman and a good woman would submit to her husband in all things.
If what the man wants is a sin agains God then she is bound to obey the will of God. I think we shouldn't really be asking that because the answer is obvious.
Submitting to your husband does not come natural to many women you really have to work at it over and over again but with time if you really try you can achieve this.
You even learn to be proud of yourself for having that quality because it really is the foundation of a good home and family.
As the bible says .. all is vanity but true love is not boastful or proud.
It is so much easier and humorous when a woman submits to her husband than when she is in constant power struggle with the man.
Some people argue that men could abuse submissiveness. But men also abuse women who are not submissive.
The most important thing is at the end of the day you know you gave your best, you did it right in the eyes of God and of man.
The man is the head of the home and the woman cannot be equal to the man. Even if you are superior to him by virtue of education or any other reason. It is your duty to relinquish that superiority and place yourself under him. That is true love and that is one of the most relevant qualities of a good wife.

I agree with your post except the equality part
Thanks.

freecocoa:
The point remains, what if he fails in his part? Does that mean you should fail too?

It can be turned round to say If a woman fails, must the man fail too?

GHoJes:
From the christain view which you are looking at submission, it related it to a man being a true practising christain. If the act that brought the non submission is not christlike including treating the woman unjustly (certainly not christlike), then non submission is not totally out of place. Though not spelt out to the letter, it is same as children obey your parents in the lord otherwise people will force their children to obey them in all things because the bible said so. To confirm that it is meant for men that are truely christlike, it went further to tell the man to love like christ. The question therefore is, has the man screaming submission from his woman loved or is willing to love like christ? Does he even know what it means to love like christ? Does he know christ to start with? Some of the people screaming the "christain" submission as you put it, only go to church on new year's eve, only know that portion of the bible because their fellows said it is in the good book, are certified or uncertified atheist. Do you know that there's a reward/motivation for submission?

Firstly, submission is not forced, it is of freewill as in man to God. Secondly total submission can only be to God regardless of the situation because only him is perfect. Inspite of this, there is non righteous that totally submit at all times to a perfect God let alone to an imperfect man, one can only strive to be perfect.

As i hinted before, even God rewards those who submit to him by lifting them up as he said in Peters or motivates you to submit by lifting you up to acknowledge that it is grace that made it and thus humble yourself, where you ungreatfully does not recognises his grace, he can decide to bring you down. In same vein, the man is told to love his wife like christ love the church as the woman's return for submitting. It is only an ungreatful woman that will not submit to a loving man. In my Pov, it is actually difficult to love like christ than to submit. If many men give themselves to understanding aside doing the christ type of love, they will be too overwhelmed to scream submission because then they will see the bigger log is in their eyes.

Treating your fellow human unjustly is a sin before God. Basically if the act is not just or is a sin before God then the woman can decide not to submit.

Classic Classic Classic

I see you by

freecocoa:
The bible is known to speak from both sides of the mouth, so....

No offence to anyone.

No it doesn't

You Don't pick one verse and run with it...

The Bible is a book with all principles interwoven.

BABE3:
Hallelujah cocoa.

People are beginning to see the bible for what it is.
It's a new dawn.

You ran away from your thread.

Your thoughts?

One time I think you are a Christian.... today I

bukatyne:
No it doesn't

You Don't pick one verse and run with it...

The Bible is a book with all principles interwoven.

I will take you up on this someday, in the religious section, wouldn't like to turn this thread into what it wasn't intended for.

Deal?

bukatyne:

It can be turned round to say If a woman fails, must the man fail too?

Ofcourse it can, but we are focusing on the woman today na.

GHoJes:
Sin is only pardonable by God and the yardstick he use for measuring is not for you and me to know. I know you must have seen two people commit same sin in your sight but paid differently by God. That part of the scripture is a very wise one which people overlook or abuse to their advantage. I think it must have ensued from men screaming submission without loving hence they gave them their needed submission with an attache because it is unlikely to find a loved woman not submitting. A man who does not love his wife christlikely (sinner) as no right to acuse his woman that doesnt submit (sinner) like the halot and the scribe cases in the bible.
A woman who disobey God in one or more levels and submit in all things to her husband is not better than a woman who does not submit at all to her man before God. My dear, the truth of the matter is, it is the holy spirit that can make anybody to submit to God or man the God's way. For sins that are not spelt outrightly in the bible like failure to submit in a particular thing that you feel is not right with God, the holy spirit will convict you. If you feel guilty it is sin from you but the spirit may not convict another in same shoe. Like paul said about those who eat idol meat and feel guilty, it is sin to them but it is not sin to those who eat it without feeling guilt. The conclusion of the matter is that you have no authority to lift that part of the bible for use without practising the rest lest the devil tell you paul i know, who are you?

There must not be incentive before submission, that is why the bible tell christain to marry only christains unless before the person became a christain so that there will be no issue with loving and submitting. Christain here mean practising one.

Hmmmmmmm

Thank God this is coming from someone else.

Again, classic and thank you.

freecocoa:
Really? I started it? when you are the one who said I know next to nothing about marriage, talking about how men function like you are the one incharge of their operating manual, smh.

And to even think that of all things to take a jab at me with, you decided to go with my being single, after Reality 101 and Chuky, like they and I actually have anything you know of, you are indeed the perfect woman.

We were interfacing until you call out my hubby which is totally unacceptable.

GHoJes:
I had to bring the holyspirit to tell you that it is only him that can make you do things the God's way not just because you like to do them. It is easy for one to become a born again but it aint easy to remain a born again even if the person want to. You know there are some godly virtues you want to keep but you cant that your flesh is weak. If you like put all your effort to such thing, it is only a matter of time you go back to where you started or continues with serious struggle to no good yield. It is the spirit that can make it light and help you it easily. Without being too spiritual, i tell you it is same spirit that can make you understand what i'm saying.
There are levels of submission, it is not just the basics.
Submission does not mean literally all things otherwise if your man says sleep with his boss for money and you disobey, you have not sinned. Your first and supreme submission is to God, anything short of his commands to you is the sin. Do you know of a young prophet God told to do something in the bible but an older experienced prophet came and told him otherwise, in submission he obeyed the prophet instead and paid by losing his life because he submitted to prophet more than God as the rule was for him to submit to the prophet.
That submission took cognisance of the woman's safety in that the man who submit to God can't demand ungodly submission from is wife.

@ bold...

Hence the Bible states that we should not marry unbelievers.

Rich.

freecocoa:
I will take you up on this someday, in the religious section, wouldn't like to turn this thread into what it wasn't intended for.

Deal?

No problem