₦airaland Forum

My fellow Nairalanders, which GRAMMAR makes u laugh ur head out each time u remember it ??

I'll open the floor:

During our orientation camp in Bayelsa, one of our mates (a female) reported to the Hausa Soldier in charge of our platoon about her missing bucket and soap.

Girl: Sir they have stolen my bucket (sobbing seriously)
Hausa Soldier: Don't waary
Hausa Soldier: (In a bid to ask her if she can recognise her bucket he said..) Kaiiiiiii, IF I SEE MY BACKIT WILL U RESEMBLE IT??

.

dukeolumde:
My fellow Nairalanders, which GRAMMAR makes u laugh ur head out each time u remember it ??

I'll open the floor:

During our orientation camp in Bayelsa, one of our mates (a femail) reported to the Hausa Soldier in charge of our platoon about her missing bucket and soap.

Girl: Sir they have stolen my bucket (sobbing seriously)
Hausa Soldier: Don't waary
Hausa Soldier: Kaiiiiii, IF I SEE MY BACKIT WILL U RESEMBLE IT??

Mine is "one of our mates (a femail)".........

doublewisdom:
Mine is "one of our mates (a femail)".........

Dat kind femail am sure its a rare species.

doublewisdom:
Mine is "one of our mates (a femail)".........

All join

Greyworld:
Dat kind femail am sure its a rare species.

Lobatan

dukeolumde:
My fellow Nairalanders, which GRAMMAR makes u laugh ur head out each time u remember it ??

I'll open the floor:

During our orientation camp in Bayelsa, one of our mates (a female) reported to the Hausa Soldier in charge of our platoon about her missing bucket and soap.

Girl: Sir they have stolen my bucket (sobbing seriously)
Hausa Soldier: Don't waary
Hausa Soldier: Kaiiiiii, IF I SEE MY BACKIT WILL U RESEMBLE IT??

Is my father that born u??

Na our physics teacher back then in secondary school o
.
Baba physics - have you been to the lab today
.
Me - No sir!
.
Baba physics - very bad boy, oya been to lab!

Hydromonopologeographicationalism is becoming an Odoriferous Saga...

Swegzfreak:
Na our physics teacher back then in secondary school o
.
Baba physics - have you been to the lab today
.
Me - No sir!
.
Baba physics - very bad boy, oya been to lab!

john4reala:
Hydromonopologeographicationalism is becoming an Odoriferous Saga...

That must be from my man Patrick Obahigbon

Your face look similar

I grew up in a mini Barrack in Mafoluku Lagos where one of my Landlord's son Gamiu was always fond of a girl in d compound called Aminat. She was educated while
Gamiu was not and couldn't really express himself in English hence always spoke Yoruba, while Aminat always prefered to speak English.
Each time they saw each other Aminat will run away on sighting Gamiu. So one faithful evening Gamiu suddenly ran into her at the staircase:

Gamiu: Aminat o den se mi paa ooo (Meaning: Aminat ur not treating me well at all..)
Aminat: Ooooooh Gamiu leeeeave me jooooor
Aminat: Gamiu ur really stressing me joooor
Gamiu: (****Confused and suddenly burst out in English****) Mina wait nah, u think say I want to "RAGGABU" u

The quy wanted to visit the qents
Student: Sir, I am Impressed Teacher: You are what? Student: Sir please sir I am really impressed.............(I am pressed)

ThePeacemaker:
The quy wanted to visit the qents

Student: Sir, I am Impressed
Teacher: You are what?
Student: Sir please sir I am really impressed.............(I am pressed)

dukeolumde:
My fellow Nairalanders, which GRAMMAR makes u laugh ur head out each time u remember it ??

I'll open the floor:

During our orientation camp in Bayelsa, one of our mates (a female) reported to the Hausa Soldier in charge of our platoon about her missing bucket and soap.

Girl: Sir they have stolen my bucket (sobbing seriously)
Hausa Soldier: Don't waary
Hausa Soldier: (In a bid to ask her if she can recognise her bucket he said..) Kaiiiiiii, IF I SEE MY BACKIT WILL U RESEMBLE IT??

I has it

One hot afternoon when I was travelling in one of these congested buses... due situation, we sat 4 - 4 in in bus that should carry 3 per seat.

One of the ladies who claim she sabi, English wella come mess up herself as others were complaining to driver to stop delay.

The young lady who wanted to say, driver move this car we are SUFFOCATING here...
Then said, driver move this car we are FORNICATING here

Funny, this one happened back in high school. Someone let out a fart, you know the type that has no sound but smells really bad?
Well, a friend of mine suspected one dude in our class and he out-rightly accused him to the hearing of almost everybody in the class...the dude in an effort to defend himself started screaming " i am the one? "

www

Titto93:
One hot afternoon when I was travelling in one of these congested buses... due situation, we sat 4 - 4 in in bus that should carry 3 per seat.

One of the ladies who claim she sabi, English wella come mess up herself as others were complaining to driver to stop delay.

The young lady who wanted to say, driver move this car we are SUFFOCATING here...
Then said, driver move this car we are FORNICATING here

'twas back then in Jss1, a classmate was celebrating her birthday with a cake. So we sang the usual 'happy birthday to u' song to her. After the song, one of my classmates asked our class teacher the age of the girl by saying, "How old are she"?

Oyindaberry:
'twas back then in Jss1, a classmate was celebrating her birthday with a cake. So we sang the usual 'happy birthday to u' song to her. After the song, one of my classmates asked our class teacher the age of the girl by saying, "How old are she"?

LWKMD

My civic teacher back then was like" does it good to make fun ov your teacher" "what will you bought for me" "go to the UpSTEP"

it has been tay(long)since i wash dat movie.my classmate

This one happened some years back while we were chilling in a local call centre in oluwo, abeokuta. The name of the last bus stop is police post because there is a police post in that area. This girl just came and called the person she came to meet to inform him she has got there. She put the call through and said, "hello, I'm in police custody. Come and pick me.
Everybody just swell like gari ijebu for her to leave so that we could burst.

joewizzy247:
it has been tay(long)since i wash dat movie.my classmate

Bacteriocin:
This one happened some years back while we were chilling in a local call centre in oluwo, abeokuta. The name of the last bus stop is police post because there is a police post in that area. This girl just came and called the person she came to meet to inform him she has got there. She put the call through and said, "hello, I'm in police custody. Come and pick me.
Everybody just swell like gari ijebu for her to leave so that we could burst.

iceberryose:
My civic teacher back then was like" does it good to make fun ov your teacher" "what will you bought for me" "go to the UpSTEP"

"Oya come and be going"

IceDude:
"Oya come and be going"

Mine was in sec scul our Dsp then saw three guys gisting at d odd hour so he shouted one of d guys name and said. Ibezim call those boys they are 3 numbers 1 is here remaining 2 numbers

mine was at secondary school back then. A student was caught jumping the school fence and was arrested,he was then ask to mention the name of those that accompany him.
1st student: segun was there
segun:me? I were there?I were not there joor...