₦airaland Forum

Mindfulness:
I am not using you, I am entertaining you but if I were using you, you would enjoy it too.

***Chokes on ma drink! ***

PresVA:
What's the difference between trusting your husband not to cheat and depending on your husband to be faithful?

You can trust people, husband or not, but you should never depend on them. Trust is useful, dependency is harmful. If you trust people without depending on them, you are self-sufficient and nothing can do you. This is the difference.

EfemenaXY:
***Chokes on ma drink! ***

Mindfulness:
I am not using you, I am entertaining you but if I were using you, you would enjoy it too.

So smug and naughty.

EfemenaXY:
***Chokes on ma drink! ***

Easy there....

babygirlfl:
True and like I always say choice and worth is what I believe in.

Yeserie

Madam, this abandonment thing sha

[/quote]Lol.

Most folks don't know but It's a known and true fact (from real experiences) that men's worst nightmare is loneliness in their old age. That's why they are in their best behaviour and very respectful in their mid forties.

Ladies who are married to much older men will confirm this.

MusingsOfALady:
Gotcha! Lol.

Ok. Another angle is the role our society has played in this matter. Men are excused while a woman who is being cheated on is asked to try harder, wear lingerie, cook better food, offer 24/7 sex. The men are given a playful slap on the wrist (if any) and told to be more careful next time.

Now if you consider that they even blame themselves for being cheated on, one can perfectly understand why they blame other women, right?

Ewuro4 that abandonment plan na long ting o.Life is so uncertain ojare.Who says it won't be the woman who will be ill or die first ?

If we are to measure coolness and the person who used to over stress themselves ,my dad would have 20 years over my mum meanwhile she is alive and kicking while he is the one who died young

Mindfulness:
I don't get the question. Who are single cheats?

People who sleep with married folks

MusingsOfALady:
So smug and naughty.

Very true.

edwife:
But as a wife on the side chick's perspective,why will i blame her?Why was she called an I/diot?Why do most of the posters here always attack any female who is a second wife?I still remember the thread that got us banned in multitude.

Don't get me wrong,i am one who will never tolerate infidelity-i might not sing it everywhere but i will find it very difficult to forgive.

I will also not in any time approach any mistress or even call them to order BUT if she crosses the line and comes for me,i am gonna go for her too.

If she threatens me,i will have to protect myself.I have a friend who was harassed by her husband's mistress for 6 months even when the man cut off all contact with her.She almost got her kidnapped just to take her place,and you really think i still have nothing to do with the mistress?

A second wife will be insulted because she is the one posting.

If a guy opens a thread that his babe is sleeping with a married man, the married man is NONE of the guy's business; his cheating girlfriend is and I do not care if the married man chased her or jazzed her.

If a side chic attacks you/the kids first, then she has made herself your business (God forbid)

MusingsOfALady:
Easy there....

Nice thread OP. The sanity of it brought me out of 'retirement'. My apologies for derailing.

njokusboy:
People who sleep with married folks

They are free to sleep with whoever they want to. Not my business.

Burntpalace:
Nice thread OP. The sanity of it brought me out of 'retirement'. My apologies for derailing.

Welcome back! Glad to know I facilitated your return.

bukatyne:
I am giving you a sitting ovation here

Lol! Thanks, Bukky.

Mindfulness:
They are free to sleep with whoever they want to. Not my business.

Not everything you are free to do is right, technically, a married man is still free to sleep with anybody, it is no crime...

It became your business when you attempted to imply that single folks should be absolved of any responsibility if they tango with a married man becos they of their isolated value system....
This is wrong no matter how you look at it...

damiso:
Ewuro4 that abandonment plan na long ting o life is so uncertain ojare.who says it won't be the woman who will be ill or die first ?

If we are to measure coolness and the person who used to over stress themselves ,my dad would have 20 years over my mum meanwhile she is alive and kicking while he is the one who died young

Am just imagining a lady planning to leave her husband dying just a year before her planned date. The husband them marries the mistress. That woman no go enjoy heaven o, she go just sey vex for the Angels.

byvan03:
Hahaha, you didn't remember that? Chilis, cococandy, bukatyne, sophyrocks, one of them must remember. Is a thread about how women become unattractive with age and as usual you proved that men are even scarier to look when age sets in.

I heard my name o!

EfemenaXY:
Not necessarily. Don't get me wrong, I'm not absolving the girl on the side of all blame, but honestly, in a union, who are the people responsible for keeping the union sanctified? Does the man not owe it to his wife to be faithful and likewise, the wife to him too? Who then should mistress "A" be accountable to? The man? His wife?

Holding the girl to ransome is akin to saying you'll hold all his "bits on the side" to ransome. If the guy is a chronic womaniser, how many of his side-chicks will you go after na? 10? 50? 100? 300? At what point should the wife draw the line with her Valentino of a spouse?

I get what you're trying to say but personally, I just can't agree with it because it's just one step away from monitoring the ladies and that in itself, is just one step away from confronting them.

Biko, the best thing to do is let the man know he's walking on a tight-rope. He either sticks with his wife or he gets the hell out. And while he's moving out, she should get herself a good lawyer and take her cheating spouse to the drycleaners and squeeze him of every Penny, Cent, or Kobo he's got.

That way, she gets something (hopefully everything) from the split. Then let's see if he'll be that keen to jump beds, or better still, if side chicks X, Y, Z will still "love" the broke man.

How did I miss this comment?
Bukatyne, thanks for quoting it and Efe 100 000 likes.

MusingsOfALady:
Am just imagining a lady planning to leave her husband dying just a year before her planned date. The husband them marries the mistress. That woman no go enjoy heaven o, she go just sey vex for the Angels.

@ vex for angels.

Folks are different but I would actually have high BP or some kain mental illness plotting against someone I am living,eating&sleeping with for years.

I don't even know if I can chill to investigate cheating before pouncing or issuing ultimatums. E dey pepper my body like that.
You know when people say 'I know he is cheating 'and they are advised 'chill' pretend all is well cook for him etc'I honestly think I would have a nervous breakdown before the 'planned confrontation date'

My mum is always saying 'you can't be such an open book in life ' but I guess that's just how am wired.

MusingsOfALady:
This abandonment thing in my opinion is not a great idea, except you are like 2decades younger.

I mean you spend your youth suffering and smiling then when he is 60 and you are 55 you leave him and start life all over,?
Start living alone or being a burden to your kids.

If a woman wants to leave, leave now whole you have your youth.

My opinion though

I share this view wholeheartedly.

I would never choose to spend my life with a cheater just to get back at them when I am old. I can't stay angry for such a long period of time and I don't want to. I forgive easily and I do it for myself. I would shrug it off and continue to enjoy my life. My happiness is more important to me than anyone or anything.

damiso:
Ewuro4 that abandonment plan na long ting o life is so uncertain ojare.who says it won't be the woman who will be ill or die first ?

If we are to measure coolness and the person who used to over stress themselves ,my dad would have 20 years over my mum meanwhile she is alive and kicking while he is the one who died young

True.

Ofcourse the 'old age Ab. analogy' excludes life uncertainties and leaves all 'plans' null and void. Lobatan case closed. He wins.

njokusboy:
Not everything you are free to do is right, technically, a married man is still free to sleep with anybody, it is no crime...

It became your business when you attempted to imply that single folks should be absolved of any responsibility if they tango with a married man becos they of their isolated value system....
This is wrong no matter how you look at it...

Your opinion and I don't agree. If you want to know why, read the last 50 pages.

Wait up, is dis place a woman chatroom or what, e be like I go run oh...

Burntpalace:
Lol. Burnt palace=ileobatojo in English.


It's really me. I could prove it by going around collecting scalps but I don't think I'll stay for long.

How can I convince you?

Welcome back

How is your family? Work? Life? generally?

Bellong, ileoba is back

Mindfulness, this was the moniker I thought you were

MusingsOfALady:
Am just imagining a lady planning to leave her husband dying just a year before her planned date. The husband them marries the mistress. That woman no go enjoy heaven o, she go just sey vex for the Angels.

Lol. Real vex . Dem go send am back.

Ewuro4:
True.

Ofcourse the 'old age Ab. analogy' excludes life uncertainties and leaves all 'plans' null and void. Lobatan case closed. He wins.

Abi o he wins

Mindfulness:
Your opinion and I don't agree. If you want to know why, read the last 50 pages.

Clearly we dont... I have read all, for clarity, this is what I posted...

Anyway...

Anyway, cheating is no crime according to any law.. No one ggets jailed for cheating on his/her spouse?
However, as much as marriage is a vow between partners, it is also a declaration that those partners are off the marriage market.. so people should stay off, any other person becomes an intruder... the husband is wrong for breaking his vows, the other woman is also wrong for intruding.. an intruder is never devoid of blame...
I employ a gateman to watch my house, he connives with an outsider to steal my property and you are telling me the outsider shouldn't share an equal blame becos I didn't employ him? Where's d logic??
This is why young girls recklessly throw themselves at married men, becos of crazy rationalisations such as this
Like edwife said, if there are no sellers, there would be no buyers...

Since you don't have a strong reason for not agreeing, I leave you in peace

damiso:
Abi o he wins

Bastardo.

njokusboy:
Clearly we dont... I have read all, for clarity, this is what I posted...




Since you don't have a strong reason for not agreeing, I leave you in peace

Peace be with you too.

bukatyne:
Welcome back

How is your family? Work? Life? generally?

Bellong, ileoba is back

Mindfulness, this was the moniker I thought you were

Thanks dear! Things have been going well. We thank God.

Hello to my tennis buddy Mr Bellong!

I am leaving now everyone. Have a lovely day, evening, night, morning - wherever you may be - and never forget that life is supposed to be FUN.

Have a blessed Sunday!