₦airaland Forum

Haywhymido:
dear delishpot, how many av u counted now dat av support d man Stop the hating, u will still get married to one. What is wrong/right will always be wrong/right

oloyede252:
abi o.nairaland will just kill some people.

Haywhymido:
dear delishpot, how many av u counted now dat av support d man Stop the hating, u will still get married to one. What is wrong/right will always be wrong/right

byvan03:
Don't ever sleep with your eyes closed before he wakes one night with his voices telling him to kill all supposed conspirators.

Mindfulness:
I was thinking the same. It is scary, really.

HateU2:
That's what is causing problem in this marriage.
Discussing what you encounter everyday with your spouse does not mean you are letting out secrets.
Try to read 'Taiwo Iredele's' books.
I'm not married but believe when I say I'm equipped with knowledge of marriage.

byvan03:
It's a dire situation, watched a program on DisD, the man exhibited these symptoms before he murdered his entire family, kids included.

tortmistress:
Ladies and gentleman I am at my wits' end and need some help. My hubby of 8 years, who used to be a lovely, generous man, has turned around to become someone I cannot recognize. I myself am not from Nigeria. I have started to wonder if maybe others may have a better sense of what is happening here - that maybe there are some cultural issues that I am missing.

To the meat of the story - my hubby and I have been living quite peacefully with no major problem with our two children. 2015 I started to notice that my hubby seemed concerned if I chat with any brother at church, even briefly. Because of my profession, some people at church will accost me after service to ask 1 or 2 questions and I will often give advice but of course there is nothing bad or immoral being discussed. My hubby has always been aware this happens, and had not problem but recently started being annoyed if the person asking a question is a brother. I tried to discuss with him but also reduced my habit to keep the peace.

Okay, I thought maybe that is all but then things started to get worse - my hubby started to ask me what did I tell this person or that person about him. And I said ah of course I cannot discuss you with this person, if you are mentioned it's just them asking how you are doing and asking to send their regards to you. He started claiming I am discussing him with people and that I am letting people know his business. I try to ask him to clarify what exactly I have said, and to who, and to tell me where he is getting this information but he does not answer. I just say eh sorry but really I don't know what he is talking about.

Things now have gotten seriously out of hand. He is claiming that he has it on good authority that I have conspired with some evil people that are targeting him and I am doing things on purpose to agitate him. I have tried everything I can try to explain to him that this is not true, and that I don't even know how one conspires with evil people. He says someone confirmed his suspicions and told him that I made a deal with the evil people that I will help them to make his life miserable, and in return I will get custody of the children. I have not idea who the person that told him that is and I have not idea where that theory is coming from because God knows my heart, I have never had any evil intent toward my hubby.

His behaviour has become increasingly bizarre and he wakes me up at all times of the night asking me to tell him about the conspiracy that is going on concerning him. When I say I don't know he get agitated and tells me I am such a liar. He claims the children are also being used against him to mock him (our oldest is 6). He says other people outside also mock him. There is no peace in my house, every day is a new story. I cannot have a simple conversation without being accused of mocking him or trying to manipulate him so I can laugh with the evil people. I have informed his family back home and they simply say we should pray for our marriage. I suggested to him that maybe we should try to speak to psychologist and he said a prophet already told him that the evil people and I intend to lie about him and say he is crazy.

Please can someone shed some light on this for me? It is sad and heartbreaking for me to even type this but the truth is that if I cannot understand what is going on soon and see a light at the end of the tunnel I will have to turn my back on my marriage. Please if anyone knows anything that can help me understand him and help him let me know. Thank you for reading this far.

lofty900:
I said if he refuses help. He obviously has a problem but pride has made him blind to the fact. So the solution is to dump him unless you want the innocent woman to suffer

HateU2:
That's what is causing problem in this marriage.
Discussing what you encounter everyday with your spouse does not mean you are letting out secrets.
Try to read 'Taiwo Iredele's' books.
I'm not married but believe when I say I'm equipped with knowledge of marriage.

tortmistress:
Ladies and gentleman I am at my wits' end and need some help. My hubby of 8 years, who used to be a lovely, generous man, has turned around to become someone I cannot recognize. I myself am not from Nigeria. I have started to wonder if maybe others may have a better sense of what is happening here - that maybe there are some cultural issues that I am missing.

To the meat of the story - my hubby and I have been living quite peacefully with no major problem with our two children. 2015 I started to notice that my hubby seemed concerned if I chat with any brother at church, even briefly. Because of my profession, some people at church will accost me after service to ask 1 or 2 questions and I will often give advice but of course there is nothing bad or immoral being discussed. My hubby has always been aware this happens, and had not problem but recently started being annoyed if the person asking a question is a brother. I tried to discuss with him but also reduced my habit to keep the peace.

Okay, I thought maybe that is all but then things started to get worse - my hubby started to ask me what did I tell this person or that person about him. And I said ah of course I cannot discuss you with this person, if you are mentioned it's just them asking how you are doing and asking to send their regards to you. He started claiming I am discussing him with people and that I am letting people know his business. I try to ask him to clarify what exactly I have said, and to who, and to tell me where he is getting this information but he does not answer. I just say eh sorry but really I don't know what he is talking about.

Things now have gotten seriously out of hand. He is claiming that he has it on good authority that I have conspired with some evil people that are targeting him and I am doing things on purpose to agitate him. I have tried everything I can try to explain to him that this is not true, and that I don't even know how one conspires with evil people. He says someone confirmed his suspicions and told him that I made a deal with the evil people that I will help them to make his life miserable, and in return I will get custody of the children. I have not idea who the person that told him that is and I have not idea where that theory is coming from because God knows my heart, I have never had any evil intent toward my hubby.

His behaviour has become increasingly bizarre and he wakes me up at all times of the night asking me to tell him about the conspiracy that is going on concerning him. When I say I don't know he get agitated and tells me I am such a liar. He claims the children are also being used against him to mock him (our oldest is 6). He says other people outside also mock him. There is no peace in my house, every day is a new story. I cannot have a simple conversation without being accused of mocking him or trying to manipulate him so I can laugh with the evil people. I have informed his family back home and they simply say we should pray for our marriage. I suggested to him that maybe we should try to speak to psychologist and he said a prophet already told him that the evil people and I intend to lie about him and say he is crazy.

Please can someone shed some light on this for me? It is sad and heartbreaking for me to even type this but the truth is that if I cannot understand what is going on soon and see a light at the end of the tunnel I will have to turn my back on my marriage. Please if anyone knows anything that can help me understand him and help him let me know. Thank you for reading this far.

tortmistress:
I am really very respectful toward him, and do not do things to aggravate him on purpose but now anything I say he takes it the wrong way. It is difficult to have a simple discussion.

lofty900:
Take him not to a psychologist but to a psychiatrist. He's suffering from paranoia. If he refuses to accept help, dump his arrogant sorry asssss

bjcole:
Take it easy with him first, your husband is acting under influence, he has been told something like you conniving with people to tarnish him. There may some secrets he told you and at this point he is feeling unsafe. Now my advice is first for you to relax your discussion or whatever it is handle in church for now, you need to settle your home first. He needs every assurances now in deeds not just talking so as to put whatever prophecy he has been told to nought.

Mintayo:
He is your husband, you should know when he will be stable for a simple discussion. Know his mood. Then commit him to your creator.

Ybaby:
Schizophrenia !

Get him help quick

byvan03:
Don't ever sleep with your eyes closed before he wakes one night with his voices telling him to kill all supposed conspirators.

jusRadical:
Home breaker. Who told you that the man is a proid person.

I figure you do not know what marriage is all about. Dump, dump , dump.

khiaa:
If you read her post entirely you should understand that her husband has an UNSTABLE MIND.

khiaa:
If he doesn't get help, she had better get those kids and herself the hell out of there.

khiaa:
He is mentally sick and you know it, he is paranoid, you better use your God given sense and get your kids and yourself out of that house before its to late.
I have someone who is mentally sick who is close to me and its no joke.
Move out and get him psychiatric help, the only alternative to what is causing his behaviour is drugs.

bjcole:
Madam, cutting the head is not solution to the headache.

MurderX:
OP, to be frank, I dont trust you. I suspect your husband knows what he is saying. Please leave him alone if you are tired of the marriage.

pickabeau1:
another religion bashing thread




Op

-have u been sincere to your husband
-Has anyone of your friends or.family chucked out their hubby on 'flimsy' divorces to live fat on settlement
- the issue here is trust

khiaa:
The issue here is mental illness.