₦airaland Forum

Ojiofor:
Tinubu want to get rid of the only shining star in bubu's government out of tribalism.

SleekAbokii:
Tinubu a useless Yahoo Yahoo leader!

Activa:
2million adults?!
Consider it again.
That's a small country.

sonOfLucifer:
NIGERIA: A S[color=#000000]HI[/color]TSTORY

It was a long time ago, when pit latrines were still in vogue, and 18 was considered old...For a lady.

But this story isn't about the feminine gender, or feminism; those are definitely not shitty topics.

You see, I'd like to discuss with you something that was a part of our forebears' morning roster. As they said in those days : "An early trip to the pit, makes the farm a happy place", "He who gets to the pit last, does not want breakfast", "Early to drop off, early to set off"..

So, just as the sun rose, the s[color=#000000]hi[/color]t level in pit buckets around the neighbourhood rose, blessed abundantly by the orifices of the general population.

These pit latrines had to be regularly emptied. Of course, if you decided not to, it was totally up to you. I will spare the readers the details; this article is shitty enough already.

So, erm, why would any reasonable being spend time discussing pit latrines as a relic of our past?

Well, because the analogy is relevant to what we experience today as Nigerians. NIGERIA is indeed a pit latrine, and I say this with all respect to my motherland and the great nations that form it. All the constituents trapped in this shitty hell hole, some larger than the others, some little like peanuts, others just literally all over the place.

Every country is indeed a pit latrine, better countries just have less s[color=#000000]hi[/color]t in them. No country is perfect, but just like a public toilet, the less ooze, the better.

We have been through a lot of s[color=#000000]hi[/color]t; a civil war, numerous tribal conflicts. Yet we somehow moved beyond this and the darkness that was Abacha's glasses. Got democracy, dug a General out of a shithole and installed him as President. The world hailed our nascent democracy, we congratulated ourselves and hoped for a bright future. New government, same old s[color=#000000]hi[/color]t.

Odi, Political assassinations, Tafa Balogun, failed third term bid, Atiku, MEND and unMEND. The Old General was doing his best in a shitty situation. Maybe adding more s[color=#000000]hi[/color]t would make the old s[color=#000000]hi[/color]t disappear. Maybe yelling 'Pdp power' at it would make the ooze smell like blueberries and all those oyibo fruits. For all his efforts, the Old General got a library for himself. Not a shitty piece of reward if you ask me. And he became a shitsman. Or was it, statesman.

That came and went. And in came the same old s[color=#000000]hi[/color]t, but this time neatly and brilliantly packaged in a 7 point menu, sorry, agenda. In hindsight we should have known. How could one so frail looking not have his life snuffed out by the ooze from that which the failed 3rd term General handed him?
My people, that is how 7 Point Agenda went abroad for check-up and didn't show up until his funeral. Who say death no carry passport?

And, finding ourselves in another shitty situation, we installed a fisherman and zoologist, to, erhh, handle our s[color=#000000]hi[/color]t.

And he was humble. And used to be shoeless. And as proof of his humble beginnings, he showed us his home state which he had governed for some years. The lack of infrastructure and social amenities there was testament to his humility, he said. He convinced us that the billions the state earned from the government had been spent frugally because the people were a humble people. Always saving cost. Why wear shoes when you have feet? Be frugal, he told us. And we were happy. And we voted him in.

And he gave us lessons in frugality. He saved the government money by asking us to spend more. And we cried and wailed. And he heard our pleas, and they sounded like music to his ears. So he went dancing while Boko Haram ravaged. And then our Patience wore out. And we cursed our Luck.

We looked at ourselves. And elected the most glamorous shit amongst ourselves. We told ourselves “that s[color=#000000]hi[/color]t no dey smell, him no be lyk those other s[color=#000000]hi[/color]t”........

Ojiofor:
Tinubu want to get rid of the only shining star in bubu's government out of tribalism.

nuelyoyo:
its not out of tribalism, its out of personal interest. Even if Kachukwu were yoruba, tinubu would still move against him if tinubu's interest is not met. Tinubu is just being selfish.

Yinkatolu:
Who dey stay for gbagada here

luvinhubby:
The Buhari he is writing to has travelled again, Charlie abeg wait till he returns.

gr8gem:
I just dey lazy to comment dis days, sum body tell me why

gr8gem:
I just dey lazy to comment dis days, sum body tell me why

"yahoo yahoo leaders/[politicians]"

Iamlordgee:
Everybody is busy browsing
but nobody seems to notice and
understand dat d thickness of VIJU milk
is getting lighter
Tin Tomato no dey full again.....
Mtn 10mb no dey reach 24hrs again...
Fish no dey inside geisha again ooo...
Pepper no dey hot for eyes anymore...
Okro no dey draw again....
CloseUp toothpaste no dey full again...
Garri no de swell up again...
nyash no dey for back again....
Ponmo no dey thick again
Recharge card no dey last again
Raid no dey kill mosquito again ........
Abeg oooo make una leave This trash
and focus on matters that concern
us...

yomz1e:
Seriously, do you peeps just think the man like travelling for no good reasons! tell me which president doesn't travel, PMB is going round the world reestablishing broken relationship with countries who are looking for where to invest, yet Nigerians are screaming he should stop, how is investment and advancement going to come to this country? have you ever wondered why GEJ didn't travel very much or why Obama boycotted Nigeria? when you know the answer then you will stop saying all these 4krees! mschewwwwwww!

woodboi:
That 2million strikes me most, is he the one feeding them or he will just call 2 million people and command them.... oya march to Abuja!

repogirl:
Charly boy is either confused or speaking from both side of his mouth..... The corruption fighting back, are they within APC? Cos so far that's what he's implying if he's talking about Tinubu.

nuelyoyo:
its not out of tribalism, its out of personal interest. Even if Kachukwu were yoruba, tinubu would still move against him if tinubu's interest is not met. Tinubu is just being selfish.