₦airaland Forum

Right here from my little room I can hear the fire works cracking, the bells tolling and the speaker banging with the sure prophetic utterances from that energetic pastor and the over ever shouty hopeful amen booming down in a deafening degree of decibels.

Its new year’s eve, its once again a night of many hopes, a night of an incessant repetition of resolutions that never make it past the 2nd week of January and most importantly the night that the booming churchprenuership of Nigerian Pentecostal movement pulls their largest con job.
The weeks of December are always marked by the sequence of prophetic revelation being released officially by Nigerian pastors to the ever gullible masses who are ready to swallow anything hook line and sinker no matter how vague and shallow it is.

This new culture of yearly predictions by self acclaimed prophets and MOGs never cease to amaze me, more so by the fact that the people swallow the same old boring tired line yearly, there is no room for scrutiny, no pause for rational evaluation of these so called “god revealed prophecies” watered down with a smack soup of “new year’s eve cross over prayers” all met with a rather sheepish hopeful shouts of ‘amen’.

This new tradition by con men in roman collars is overly puerile and feeble and it baffles me why people cannot simply see through these cheap predictions sold to them in the name of prophecy to advertise an ever growing business that relies on such pious fraud to grow.

The very intellect of the average Nigerian is being insulted by these very nonsensical cheap utterances, as vague as shapes in a smoke.

Reasons for these
I once said ‘’if you want the people to believe something, rope it around their ignorance [as a mystery], around their fear [as a threat] and around their hope [as a promise]”

This is the sole reason for this new practice that has gone deep into the fabrics of our societal events.

There is a very dangerous form of spiritual reliance as exercised by the average Nigerian and this makes us simple preys for con men to exploit with such a simple and vague trick.

Just like the conventional business enterprise rely on adverts to garner potential customers for the growth and profit of the business man, the churchprenuership as much as much as every other business rely on the ‘Advert strategy’ to garner members for the ever growing pocket of the pastorprenuer.

So there is a increasing demand to out perform each other, a need to stand out, a need to create awareness and advertise the pastor’s ability to see into the future which is like an Opium integrated into the very fabrics of our spiritual demands.

In our desperation we have resorted to seeking knowledge of tomorrow, prophecies of how our life should or will play out and this spiritual desperation has created a very lucrative niche ready to be explored to the fullest.

These so called prophecies and revelations are not in anyway factual or correct since human events are a mesh of willful interactions reacting in the most random web, a random system can be predicted but a random system that comprises of “willful actions” such as the human societal output cannot be accurately predicted but rather guessed by sticking with the likeliest output of a given causality.

So these men are not telling you what is true but rather feast on your emotional vulnerability to tell you what you want and need to hear, utilize your insecurities to tell you what they want you to hear.

cheapness of this practices
Nothing wows me more than this cheap tricks than their success. The successful acceptance of these cheap guesses in the name of prophecies reveals a neck deep crass gullibility, a sad reality that shows the very low form of rational thinking we operate from, an epileptic analytical ability and a humongous gullibility that compounds our vulnerability to fall prey to these cheap tricks.

It baffles me how people cannot simply see through the cheap guess work fed to them as an authentic divine revelation from a supposedly incredibly all knowing source because the vagueness of these guesses brings the ‘authenticity’ of the source into question.

The method is simple – with series of past events these men take a pick of a the likeliest of the possible outcomes and voila prophecy is born.

Adeboye predicted a new kind of disease [ sexually transmitted] making wave in 2016, its no news that we get to find out new kinds of diseases almost on daily basis but from the weight of the prophecy it seemed that this one was supposed to become very popular which of course we didn’t get to know of such, now 2016 is about to end.

What is so special about someone coming to make such guess, anyone can wake up and do that – the vagueness of the prophecy goes thus; the source of this prophecy which supposedly is all knowing somehow didn’t tell adeboye the name this disease would be called [since it is revealing future events], no date, no precise symptoms but somehow a lot of people find this impressive.

Take another example; some forces will poison Buhari’s wife – Aisha Buhari clapping out against her husband’s administrations is one of the most unforgettable events of 2016, Buhari’s epic reply further amplifying the issue followed by series of reproaching reactions from some politicians against Aisha’s utterances.

Its no news that Aisha’s public presence seemed to have diminished very noticeably after the saga pointing towards a very possible reproach within the family circle and then with a chain of these interconnected events someone comes out and places a wild guess ‘some nameless forces will poison the wife of the president” I’ve got to give it to him, it’s a nice try, a good guess.

there is nothing impressive in stating Nigeria will loose some important persons within the year, for goodness sake people die in their thousands every day and important people are no more immortal than others.

And this is being fed to the public as some divinely inspired revelation – our conception upon the divine is so puerile.

It’s a new year’s eve, they are going to play the same song again, tell us another story again, another ‘amen’ again, another “this is your year” again, another “your year of divine providence, you will drive a car this year” same old cheap words aimed at fully tapping into the hope of the people.

You have shouted “amen” to “you will drive a car this new” for more than 10 new years yet still going back to repeat the same movie, drop your offering and seed to bulldoze a divine passage of progress in 2017.

Ooh are we to continue being stupid till when?

This a new year, tomorrow is no different from all days that were once tomorrow but are now yesterday, the present is the most important time since it shapes your tomorrow and paints your yesterday.

The miracle you seek do not need so many amens but the one you resolve within you, there is no such a thing as I will make it in 2017, your foundations towards achieving your dreams starts immediately do not wait for a new year or cross over night prophecies.

You are all the miracles you seek.

The undeserved attention and importance we give to these clowns In roman collars has always proven to be one of our numerous banes as they all for their own interests use our vulnerability for profits end up selling to us divine remedies for earthly problems relegating the ability of our own self to achieve our own desires through work and consistency for a platter of a more comforting lazy divine promise that needs renewal every year.

Never trust people who know so well what GOD(S) wants or the mind of GOD(S). you will notice it is always in coincide with their own mind.

cc. loj, seun pastorAIO dorox

John I don know how you sit down and string these words but you're awesome. I'm alone in the house listening to all sort of music and amplified amen from all directions. Phcn don do their work, make them pray for stable power supply in the new year, na lie, the church go on gen, we're deceiving ourselves in this country

U spitting lotta sense bro. Even thou d epistle long . Most of those religious people need a hard reset . If you try to make it clear that a prophecy is vague , they start quoting religious book. Who religious book epp?

Talk2bryant:
John I don know how you sit down and string these words but you're awesome. I'm alone in the house listening to all sort of music and amplified amen from all directions. Phcn don do their work, make them pray for stable power supply in the new year, na lie, the church go on gen, we're deceiving ourselves in this country

i saw a new year crusade church advert bill board today, i couldnt help but sigh.. "here we go again!"

johnydon22:
i saw a new year crusade church advert bill board today, i couldnt help but sigh.. "here we go again!"

I forget snap d one wey I see for sokoto " i'm not a Christmas chicken"

My girl has been begging me to attend the crossover prayer, i won't leave my bed until nepa bring light, na to go on tv dey watch.

johnydon22:
i saw a new year crusade church advert bill board today, i couldnt help but sigh.. "here we go again!"

bro as am typing there are three churches less than 200 meters from each other here in my area with each filled to capacity,shouting this is my year of testimony and am thinking are these not the same people who proclaimed the same thing last year and would still do the same next year

Well done johnydon22 for this brilliant and well written op. I enjoyed reading it, so i gave it a like and a share just because I couldn't like it twice.
The problem with most christians in Nigeria is that their religion has effectively become more or less a talisman to them. When they talk about Christ it is his power they are interested in and not his message. They go to church in search of miracles and manifestation of God's power instead of to seek God and to learn how to be the best version of themselves.

People just always need renewal for hope, after a long year of fails, hard times and difficulties there tends to be a dim in the candlelight of hope and reductions in expectations. These cross overnights serves as a good avenue to rekindle this "lost hope" by preying on heightened morales and renewed expectations. The so called preachers effect this by rewinding the same never old prophetic rhetoric, and ever gullible members continue to fall for them regardless of previous flopped predictions because as they like to say, "they believe".

Talk2bryant:
I forget snap d one wey I see for sokoto " i'm not a Christmas chicken"

My girl has been begging me to attend the crossover prayer, i won't leave my bed until nepa bring light, na to go on tv dey watch.

I think you should not be near any place of worship in this period for safety reasons. Bombs do not discriminate between those who believe sincerely and those who can't even be bothered to believe. I don't think anyone on this particular thread cares to be a martyr.

MarieSucre:
I think you should not be near any place of worship in this period for safety reasons. Bombs do not discriminate between those who believe sincerely and those who can't even be bothered to believe. I don't think anyone one this particular thread cares to be a martyr.

Heat wan finish me inside house, make I carry my mat spread for my yard.

Happy new year

I don't know. This last year wasn't particularly great for me. Lost an important figure in my life. Sometimes people need hope or an emotional crutch. I've come thus far enough to know when to live and let live.

Listening to John McLaughlin - We All Need Saving on repeat.

I am not at Cross-Over night tho. All that screaming, yelling and ordering God to do wonders will definitely induce a year long migraine. I'll pass. Anyone up for a chat?

watching them in 3D MMMD

Gbam! Every Nairalander should read this...heck, every Nigerian should read this and use their brains at least for this one time.

Talk2bryant:
Heat wan finish me inside house, make I carry my mat spread for my yard.

Happy new year

Eeyah sowie. Let me act like some Spiricoco. "ITS THE FIRES OF HEEEELL BRUDAAA, WILL YOU NOT REPENT NOOOOOOW".

Just kiddingm Happy New Year to you tooM

Talk2bryant:
Heat wan finish me inside house, make I carry my mat spread for my yard.

Happy new year

Eeyah sowie. Let me act like some Spiricoco. "ITS THE FIRES OF HEEEELL BRUDAAA, WILL YOU NOT REPENT NOOOOOOW".

Just kidding Happy New Year to you too.

MarieSucre:
I don't know. This last year wasn't particularly great for me. Lost an important figure in my life. Sometimes people need hope or an emotional crutch. I've come thus far enough to know when to live and let live.

Listening to John McLaughlin - We All Need Saving on repeat.

I am not at Cross-Over night tho. All that screaming, yelling and ordering God to do wonders will definitely induce a year long migraine. I'll pass. Anyone up for a chat?

chat away!

Talk2bryant:
Heat wan finish me inside house, make I carry my mat spread for my yard.
Happy new year

Wooow. But Niger is cold. You sure hamattan don reach una there for Sokoto?

MarieSucre:
Eeyah sowie. Let me act like some Spiricoco. "ITS THE FIRES OF HEEEELL BRUDAAA, WILL YOU NOT REPENT NOOOOOOW".

Just kiddingm Happy New Year to you too.

This new found freedom has helped me overcome claustrophobia, yoruba movies embedded all sort of bullshit in my head from tender age, now I don't believe in any, thus, no cause to fear

MarieSucre:
Wooow. But Niger is cold. You sure hamattan don reach una there for Sokoto?

Na lag I dey now, going back to sokoto in f days, im sweating and nepa no epp my situation

Talk2bryant:
This new found freedom has helped me overcome claustrophobia, yoruba movies embedded all sort of bullshit in my head from tender age, now I don't believe in any, thus, no cause to fear

Yoruba films - Claustrophobia?? I don't watch Yoruba films... Like that. So I don't know how it induces claustrophobia. But I'm happy for you. It takes a lot of strenght to let go of all that indoctrination. You're braver than half the planet. Cheers to another year of shedding more of that baggage.

MarieSucre:
Yoruba films - Claustrophobia?? I don't watch Yoruba films... Like that. So I don't know how it induces claustrophobia. But I'm happy for you. It takes a lot of strenght to let go of all that indoctrination. You're braver than half the planet. Cheers to another year of shedding more of that baggage.

When I'm alone in the dark, the images start flashing back and trust me,they are damn scary. Shedding the baggage has helped me think straight, plan well and not attribute everything to a diety. I still tell people I'm a muslim so as not to be an outcast, but deep down I'm an agnost, atheist loading.

Nice write up.. Hope they will learn

Talk2bryant:
Na lag I dey now, going back to sokoto in f days, im sweating and nepa no epp my situation

Eeyah. Lagos is always gonna be different. Sounds like a place where weird shiit happens. Like the whole Nigeria can say its been raining heavily in our various states, some Lagosian will just come up and say "it has not rained here in 5 years". Looolz. Dooh take heart.

lepasharon:

Come Nwannem, what are you doing here posting prophetic-propheticismah on nairaland. You better have been posting it from your church pulpit while the pastor is praying for your phone.

Before I close my eyes and open them again. Oyaaaa go to church by fire! By fire! By fire! By fayayayaya!!!

MarieSucre:
Come Nwannem, what are you doing here posting prophetic-propheticismah on nairaland. You better have been posting it from your church pulpit while the pastor is praying for your phone.

Before I close my eyes and open them again. Oyaaaa go to church by fire! By fire! By fire! By fayayayaya!!!

Looool

MarieSucre:
Eeyah. Lagos is always gonna be different. Sounds like a place where weird shiit happens. Like the whole Nigeria can say its been raining heavily in our various states, some Lagosian will just come up and say "it has not rained here in 5 years". Looolz. Dooh take heart.

Nothing like harmattan here, it was already getting cold b4 leaving sokoto. Guess it's the climatic change

Sometimes I can't help thinking like the OP but I do not want to.

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I just come back from church and I don receive plenty prophecies, so make una stay una lane.

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Happy new year.

Talk2bryant:
When I'm alone in the dark, the images start flashing back and trust me,they are damn scary. Shedding the baggage has helped me think straight, plan well and not attribute everything to a diety. I still tell people I'm a muslim so as not to be an outcast, but deep down I'm an agnost, atheist loading.

Its gonna take some getting used to. And years. Good Lord. Lots of years. But you'll be good. That's the marvel of the human brain. We aren't born with hate or even love sef, racism, sexism, tribalism or even theism. We learn all that shiit. And if we can learn it. Then we damn well can unlearn it.

Goodluck in your journey tho. Maybe I'll meet you for pointers sometime. You seem to have a formula down already.

You did say you "might be becoming" an ex muslim. That's weird. I have never seen one both online or offline. Its mostly ex christians. Yours sound like an interesting story. If you have the battery and the time, care to share.

MarieSucre:
Its gonna take some getting used to. And years. Good Lord. Lots of years. But you'll be good. That's the marvel of the human brain. We aren't born with hate or even love sef, racism, sexism, tribalism or even theism. We learn all that shiit. And if we can learn it. Then we damn well can unlearn it.

Goodluck in your journey tho. Maybe I'll meet you for pointers sometime. You seem to have a formula down already.

You did say you "might be becoming" an ex muslim. That's weird. I have never seen one both online or offline. Its mostly ex christians. Yours sound like an interesting story. If you have the battery and the time, care to share.

I'll share soon and mention you, got some chats that's distracting me at the moment, or we can strike a conversation, any which way na way

I admire your effort in trying to convince these sheeple in ignoring and placing so much important on silly charades occasionally orchestrated by their so called churchprenuers.
it's a shame really that even though your destiny ideally isn't in your hand do you still have to wait till someone tell you that this year you'd prosper or not or the size of your seed will have a direct effect on how successful you'd be in the new year. wow honestly we are so gullible in this country.
It would really shock me if this reaches FP, cos is says the truth