₦airaland Forum

dangotesmummy:
Fathers are becoming irrelevant in a family

Out of every 10families,8 are single moms,the 2 still with husbands are just housemates fronting as fathers in the family, the wives aren't any better than the single moms in reality because even the wives are the ones paying all the bills and playing the father and mother roles

This days mothers are now raising their children to live successfully with or without a husband

supersystemsng:
This is a bitter picture of too many modern marriages

dangotesmummy:
that's why I'm always amused at the when will she marry crew.the ones inside are living to pay bills and keep the children and family running, the partners barely have time to talk to each other and when there's a little time left they only fok,they don't make love.too many work ,children and family responsibilities barely makes them ever have time even for their individual lives or have a quiet time to think and meditate alone

I agree with the addage that says the best time of your life is your single hood as a man or woman.the moment you're married your life,time,money,resources,privacy and energy is no longer yours

No married person will ever tell a spinster or bachelor this,all they'll be saying is "go and marry", "when are we coming to eat rice".na only to put up appearances and be forming Mr and Mrs outside.

This days its 80%of wives that pay house rent, water bills,NEPA bills,children school fees and all.the Fathers own is to read news paper, shout is my food ready,go out and watch football with the boys in viewing centre,argue about politics at the beer parlor after work,then go home to sleep and keep repeating the cycle Monday down to Sunday all day long

dangotesmummy:
that's why I'm always amused at the when will she marry crew.the ones inside are living to pay bills and keep the children and family running, the partners barely have time to talk to each other and when there's a little time left they only fok,they don't make love.too many work ,children and family responsibilities barely makes them ever have time even for their individual lives or have a quiet time to think and meditate alone

I agree with the addage that says the best time of your life is your single hood as a man or woman.the moment you're married your life,time,money,resources,privacy and energy is no longer yours

No married person will ever tell a spinster or bachelor this,all they'll be saying is "go and marry", "when are we coming to eat rice".na only to put up appearances and be forming Mr and Mrs outside.

This days its 80%of wives that pay house rent, water bills,NEPA bills,children school fees and all.the Fathers own is to read news paper, shout is my food ready,go out and watch football with the boys in viewing centre,argue about politics at the beer parlor after work,then go home to sleep and keep repeating the cycle Monday down to Sunday all day long

supersystemsng:
This one worries me....

This days its 80%of wives that pay house rent, water bills,NEPA bills,children school fees and all.the Fathers own is to read news paper, shout is my food ready,go out and watch football with the boys in viewing centre,argue about politics at the beer parlor after work,then go home to sleep and keep repeating the cycle Monday down to Sunday all day long


They dress up hawk lame gists around the neighborhood, return at home at night like they've been at work all day...

dangotesmummy:
that's exactly what operates in African families and when the wife protests or complains ,of course she will get the beating of her life and get blamed for nagging and she will also be reminded of the great privilege she has of being married

I even forgot the flirting with bartender girls at the beer parlor or club girls.my dear married women in today's world are not any better than single mothers.the only difference between them is for the married woman,there's a man living with her and legally fokeen her,the single mom is living without any man and still fokeen albeit with men of her choice

So there's basically no difference between the two

supersystemsng:
But why you are 100% correct...why don't you also see that there's this one person you'll click with, and it would feel so perfect...

I believe in exclusiveness and i know there are relationships that don't follow this principle...

We shouldn't make relationships look hopeless,dull and terrible...perhaps we need a change of how we see it..Don't you think ?

dangotesmummy:
there are sometimes you need your quiet moment not because you don't like your spouse but you just feel like being left alone and secondly sometimes you can have work related challenges or issues and the only time you can get ideas,answers and inspiration is at your quiet time when everywhere is silent.

Now realistically speaking, marriage doesn't give you such privilege because you might be in the room resting and your children are screaming, playing around the house restlessly,fighting with each other or burning something in the kitchen or your wife is screaming at the top of her voice shouting at the kids or watching TV with the volumes up

When you're married like I said earlier you don't have a space

missvera:
The person is late.

supersystemsng:
You're right...But i perceive a marriage with a difference and that from understanding these failures, the ones coming behind will pursue a different cause to create THE IDEAL MARRIAGE...I am hopeful that why all these gloom exist in marriages,there's hope for good relationships without storms

dangotesmummy:
lmao.there's nothing like ideal marriage and when you're referring to ideal marriage, you're talking about Utopian marriages....hello?that is not realistic.....all of us don't even have the perfect life,how much more an ideal marriage.

See henn marriage this days is now A PERSONAL CHOICE. If it pays you or works for you,fine,if not stay single and live the life you want to live without marital or societal inhibitions.more so you know if you're a married woman in Africa there's a limit of things you can do and where you can go,but a single woman and a single mother has freedom from societal expectations.the only thing they'll be saying in her mind is " she's a prostitute" that's why she doesn't want to marry as in the case of Genevieve, toke makinwa or Rita Dominic but no one dares says it to their faces

supersystemsng:
I rely a lot on my quiet moments...I lost a cool friendship recently because i needed quiet space and took time off without letting the other party know about it...These things can be discussed in a relationship where the communication is fab...

Most of we men need those quiet moments without which we can go down the drain...we need to help the ladies realize this... On the average i spend 6 hours on meditation during my intense periods, i spend 6 hours daily for up to six months...It doesn't mean it can't work in a relationship...I've learned to pause my quiet moments, cope with noise and then turn it back on, anytime i need....i learnt this technique by revelation...

supersystemsng:
I agree on all your views but this one..Ideal marriage is one without too much drama..I'm actively involved in the mentoring process of at least three marriages and i have proof there are marriages without drama...marriages now need a mentor more than ever to help couples work things out..What's utopia...nah...not talking about that...for example..I have a friend infact we are talking right now..we've been together since 1993, i have another family friend since 1989...not one single issue....as much as i told you friendships sucks...this is an exception...

dangotesmummy:
need LMAOOOO. How do you meditate in a noisy environment and/or your wife is making sexual advances at you when you really want time alone or be left alone?
How do you meditate in an environment where there's deafening sound of generator from neighbors or music vendors are blasting music or car horns are blaring. Where do you get your quiet times? Be real? How do you do it?

dangotesmummy:
are you sure they're not pretending for you and have chose to wash their dirty linen in private?

Or you think is by and co or PDA

dangotesmummy:
are you sure they're not pretending for you and have chose to wash their dirty linen in private?

Or you think is by and co or PDA

AuroraB:
The boy, rather
The girl is miles away from the 2. Pretty girl

jackie35:
SOMEONE IS MISSING IN THESE PICTURES

supersystemsng:
Nope...these friends have fought battles with me o...Life threatening battles...I can't wait for my God to bless them...We don't quarrel or fight..the last time i was with one, people in the street were calling us gay, so i eloped...we're just friends from heaven...I can start talking on a thing and they can walk in and finish the conversation like they heard me speak...this is how deep our connection goes....

supersystemsng:
Nope...these friends have fought battles with me o...Life threatening battles...I can't wait for my God to bless them...We don't quarrel or fight..the last time i was with one, people in the street were calling us gay, so i eloped...we're just friends from heaven...I can start talking on a thing and they can walk in and finish the conversation like they heard me speak...this is how deep our connection goes....

dangotesmummy:
lucky you

CHARLOE:
Are u referring to d ph based sugar daddy pastor?

TheShopKeeper:
Where dem papa?
Women nowadays happy to be tagged as single parent...