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Deleted! - Family - Nairaland

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Deleted! by edogu(op):
[color=#990000][/color] Deleted
Re: Deleted! by Nobody: 10:50am On Sep 22, 2017
When will you Nigerians realise white wedding is just a formality!
If you've paid bride price, she is your wife _ you are her husband.

How can it be a CRIME to impregnate one's wife umunnem?
Re: Deleted! by edogu(op):
Kkk
Re: Deleted! by PointZerom: 10:54am On Sep 22, 2017
edogu:
Good morning all, pls is it a crime for one to get pregnant after her bride price has been paid?
Pls explain better.
Re: Deleted! by edogu(op):
PointZerom:
Pls explain better.
Re: Deleted! by Nobody: 11:07am On Sep 22, 2017
edogu:
Good morning all, pls is it a crime for one to get pregnant after her bride price has been paid?
I know why you asked. You both planed on having your white wedding after the payment of bride price. Well, in some churches you won't be wedded while in others you'd. If the rules in yours are strict, then do marriage blessing.
Re: Deleted! by PointZerom: 11:15am On Sep 22, 2017
edogu:
My brother, ever since my fiance took in, she has been crying. I have made every effort to console her. Moreover, I have paid her bride price and went further to assure her that the remaining traditional rights (traditional wedding) will be concluded God's willing by the end of the year.
She complained about living under her father's roof. However, I have asked her to come live with me while we take care of other modalities.
Since you have paid her bride price what's she still doing in her father's house?. Bride price remains the last settlement in traditional way of marriage after it comes the ceremony, I wonder how you handled yours. Pls take her to your house, hope you're sure of been responsible for that pregnancy?.
Re: Deleted! by edogu(op): 11:16am On Sep 22, 2017
kimbraa:
I know why you asked. You both planed on having your white wedding after the payment of bride price. Well, in some churches you won't be wedded while in others you'd. If the rules in yours are strict, then do marriage blessing.
Kimbraa, thanks for your concern. Actually, I didn't know she could get pregnant easily based on the last test we took. We were told that she has a hormonal imbalance.
I have paid her bride price. Unfortunately, I couldn't go ahead with the white wedding because I'm among who those were retrenched by the management Michael Okpara University of Agriculture.
However, I have assured of the traditional wedding but she's still crying.
Re: Deleted! by edogu(op): 11:21am On Sep 22, 2017
PointZerom:
Since you have paid her bride price what's she still doing in her father's house?. Bride price remains the last settlement in traditional way of marriage after it comes the ceremony, I wonder how you handled yours. Pls take her to your house, hope you're sure of been responsible for that pregnancy?.
Yes, I'm sure. Thanks by the way for your contribution.
Re: Deleted! by TheArchangel(f): 11:21am On Sep 22, 2017
PointZerom:
Since you have paid her bride price what's she still doing in her father's house?. Bride price remains the last settlement in traditional way of marriage after it comes the ceremony, I wonder how you handled yours. Pls take her to your house, hope you're sure of been responsible for that pregnancy?.
Dont say what you dont know or conversant with.
He has not even done the traditional marriage rites sef. That bride price money can be easily returned without recourse.

Edogu, you are lucky to impregnate her with the hormonal imbalance she is having. Console her and take her to see a health professional who will explain to her why she is EXTREMELY LUCKY TO BE PREGNANT WITH SUCH DIAGNOSIS.
Re: Deleted! by edogu(op): 11:24am On Sep 22, 2017
TheArchangel:
Dont say what you dont know or conversant with.
He has not even done the traditional marriage rites sef. That bride price money can be easily returned without recourse.

Edogu, you are lucky to impregnate her with the hormonal imbalance she is having. Console her and take her to see a health professional who will explain to her why she is EXTREMELY LUCKY TO BE PREGNANT WITH SUCH DIAGNOSIS.
Thanks Archangel
Re: Deleted! by Nobody: 11:25am On Sep 22, 2017
edogu:
Kimb.raa, thanks for your concern. Actually, I didn't know she could get pregnant easily based on the last test we took. We were told that she has a hormonal imbalance.
I have paid her bride price. Unfortunately, I couldn't go ahead with the white wedding because I'm among who those were retrenched by the management Michael Okpara University of Agriculture.
However, I have assured of the traditional wedding but she's still crying.
Why not ask her exactly what she wants. grin
Re: Deleted! by ElsonMorali: 11:27am On Sep 22, 2017
You say she has hormonal imbalance? This could be the reason for the crying. Loads of women cry when pregnant. It a hormonal thing. smiley

Meanwhile, You've paid her dowry and She's still in her father's house? Weird?!
Re: Deleted! by edogu(op): 11:35am On Sep 22, 2017
kimbraa:
Why not ask her exactly what she wants. grin
It's kind of psychological. She was raised under a strict condition. She's scared of her father's reaction to the news [quote][/quote]
Re: Deleted! by Nobody: 11:39am On Sep 22, 2017
edogu:
It's kind of psychological. She was raised under a strict condition. She's scared of her father's reaction to the news
Now I understand. She should know the deed has been done, and she shouldn't beat herself for it. The pregnancy doesn't stop her from having her traditional marriage as at when due.
Re: Deleted! by PointZerom: 11:43am On Sep 22, 2017
TheArchangel:
Dont say what you dont know or conversant with.
He has not even done the traditional marriage rites sef. That bride price money can be easily returned without recourse.

Edogu, you are lucky to impregnate her with the hormonal imbalance she is having. Console her and take her to see a health professional who will explain to her why she is EXTREMELY LUCKY TO BE PREGNANT WITH SUCH DIAGNOSIS.
You didn't understand my post.
Re: Deleted! by Oyindidi(f): 2:29pm On Sep 22, 2017
edogu:
Kimbraa, thanks for your concern. Actually, I didn't know she could get pregnant easily based on the last test we took. We were told that she has a hormonal imbalance.
I have paid her bride price. Unfortunately, I couldn't go ahead with the white wedding because I'm among who those were retrenched by the management Michael Okpara University of Agriculture.
However, I have assured of the traditional wedding but she's still crying.
sorry about your job, you guys can do marriage blessing after delivery. Persuade her to move in with you.
Re: Deleted! by edogu(op): 3:14pm On Sep 22, 2017
Oyindidi:
sorry about your job, you guys can do marriage blessing after delivery. Persuade her to move in with you.
Thanks
Re: Deleted! by Geosystem(m): 4:53pm On Sep 22, 2017
me think that after her parents have accepted the Bride price from you she is your wife already all others is just fomality
Re: Deleted! by mrwonlasewonie: 5:49pm On Sep 22, 2017
Are you actually sure your wife's ready to be married to you
Re: Deleted! by Ishilove: 7:19am On Sep 23, 2017
edogu:
Good morning all, pls is it a crime for one to get pregnant after her bride price has been paid?
Once your bride price is paid, you're married. In my place bride price payment is a culmination of the traditional rites and is the marriage ceremony itself. Any other ceremony is just paparazzi.

Since you've paid it, she is already your wife. Us humans are the ones complicating matters for ourselves with unnecessary, self imposed dogma
Re: Deleted! by edogu(op): 7:22am On Sep 23, 2017
Ishilove:
Once your bride price is paid, you're married. White wedding is just a formality
Thanks
Re: Deleted! by Nobody: 5:31am On Sep 24, 2017
edogu:
Good morning all, pls is it a crime for one to get pregnant after her bride price has been paid?
That means you have done a traditional African MARRIAGE.

Its just unfortunate that our colonial past degraded it and made it look like its not as good as white people's marriage ceremony.
Re: Deleted! by Ishilove: 6:39am On Sep 24, 2017
Muafrika2:
That means you have done a traditional African MARRIAGE.

Its just unfortunate that our colonial past degraded it and made it look like its not as good as white people's marriage ceremony.
Our colonial past masters didn't degrade it. It is us Africans that are enthusiastically degrading the place of traditional marriage with our deeply rooted inferiority complex
Re: Deleted! by Nobody: 6:47am On Sep 24, 2017
Ishilove:
Our colonial past masters didn't degrade it. It is us Africans that are enthusiastically degrading the place of traditional marriage with our deeply rooted inferiority complex
Re: Deleted! by sisisioge: 6:50am On Sep 24, 2017
No...she's all yours now since you've paid the dowry.
Re: Deleted! by Sanchez01: 7:32am On Sep 24, 2017
sisisioge:
No...she's all yours now since you've paid the dowry.
He paid the bride price and not dowry. I doubt if any ethnic group pay or receive dowries in Nigeria. We often take one for the other but they are not the same. smiley
Re: Deleted! by sisisioge:
Sanchez01:
He paid the bride price and not dowry. I doubt if any ethnic group pay or receive dowries in Nigeria. We often take one for the other but they are not the same. smiley
Really? Well the bride price makes him the owner. Other components of a dowry such as yams , wines etc might have been brought too. Abi you think he probably brought just the money? All those yams, oil, wines, etc aren't components of a dowry? We Yorubas still collect Biko...the ones groom's family brought.
Re: Deleted! by Sanchez01: 9:51am On Sep 24, 2017
sisisioge:
Really? Well the bride price makes him the owner. Other components of a dowry such as yams , wines etc might have been brought too. Abi you think he probably brought just the money? All those yams, oil, wines, etc aren't components of a dowry? We Yoruba still collect Biko...the ones groom's family brought.
I understand you perfectly and I understand the Yoruba culture like the back of my hands even though I'm not one.

However, the yams, oil and so many other items brought forward by the groom and his family to his would-be-bride's family are items required by tradition during rites.

When it comes to dowries, we refer to money paid by a bride, and, or her family to the groom. Example of this can be seen with Indians. It explains why I said we don't pay dowries here.
Re: Deleted! by Ishilove: 10:31am On Sep 24, 2017
Sanchez01:
I understand you perfectly and I understand the Yoruba culture like the back of my hands even though I'm not one.

However, the yams, oil and so many other items brought forward by the groom and his family to his would-be-bride's family are items required by tradition during rites.

When it comes to dowries, we refer to money paid by a bride, and, or her family to the groom. Example of this can be seen with Indians. It explains why I said we don't pay dowries here.
Not just money, other material items like cooking pots, sewing machine, plates and cutlery etc.
Re: Deleted! by sisisioge: 10:50am On Sep 24, 2017
Sanchez01:
I understand you perfectly and I understand the Yoruba culture like the back of my hands even though I'm not one.

However, the yams, oil and so many other items brought forward by the groom and his family to his would-be-bride's family are items required by tradition during rites.

When it comes to dowries, we refer to money paid by a bride, and, or her family to the groom. Example of this can be seen with Indians. It explains why I said we don't pay dowries here.
Ok, so we are going by dictionary meaning here ba? No probs...na bride price then. Thanks
Re: Deleted! by sisisioge: 10:51am On Sep 24, 2017
Ishilove:
Not just money, other material items like cooking pots, sewing machine, plates and cutlery etc.
Guy is saying the terms are wrongly used. Dowry is groom-price while bride-price is the iyawo price according to the dictionary grin
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