₦airaland Forum

DonteMec:
Hello Fellow Nairalanders,
I have been a nairalander for years but this would be my first post. I have a very serious problem and I need your wonderful suggestions to guide me along.
I have been married for like Ten years with kids. My wife is a very good, faithful and wonderful lady. I traveled out of the country for 2 years and just came back this last December. However since then I have this rather strange problem, which has never happened prior to this period.
My wife is frigid. She really doesn't like sex. I hate that aspect of her. I have a high sex drive while she has little to zero sex drive. This has of course brought all sorts quarrel over the years. I have since learnt to manage her that way and bear that as my cross, since that is her only weak point. But its not easy.
I made love to my wife the first day I came back. It was all good. But subsequent attempts to make love to her, my penis simply refuses to stand erect. Try everything in the book still it will not stand. It's like the penis is scared of my wife, because even a thought of her makes an erect penis go flat immediately. If I strive to put it in with lots and lots of efforts, hoping it will thicken inside, it will stay for 35 seconds, less than a minute and ejaculate.
I have had to go for tests and it shows no sickness nor venereal disease. But I have gone for an intensive treatment for all kinds of powerful venereal disease, known and unknown for 3 weeks just to leave nothing to chance. After that, the penis started getting up again.
I made love to my wife very powerfully again after the treatment. I lasted for 45 minutes or there about for a round which is my usual style. I was happy that everything is back to normal. However 2 days later we tried to make love again, the penis starts being shy of my wife again. It has been several days since then we have kept on trying, no headway at all. Am confused. The penis simply refuses to stand erect - Jeez this is scary ...
I want to take my wife for a test of her own though she has no symptoms of any illness as I also didn't have prior to all these.
However I want to know:
Is there any venereal disease that is strong enough to paralyze a penis just one day after enjoying it?
Could this be as a result of some other reason or factor which I don't know nor understand?
Note: My wife is a very faithful one and I trust her. However I just want to explore every possibility.
Also note that prior to this I could go for 3 to 5 rounds in a single night, with each round lasting for 45 minutes or there about. Am 41 if you care to know. (Well with my wife its always 1 round of like 1 hour duration)
I love good sex and this is frustrating the hell out of me. Please every kind of advice would be considered, even the weird ones lol

Bro, I will advise you go on fruit fasting for 10 days. Only fruits and vegetables, no oil, no proteins, no groundnut, no diary products, no equsi; just fruits, vegetables such as yam and potatoes are allowed.

Come back after 10 days and share.

DonteMec:
Bros I have a concubine outside the country. That is what has kept me in this marriage. Else my wife's low sex drive would have pushed me out of the marriage. It's with the concubine/ girlfriend that I do the drilling or hard work with. With my wife I take it easy as I know her capacity. Problem is that for 2 years and 72 hours prior to my coming back I performed optimally with the said concubine. Then back to my wife, after the first day, all of a sudden my JohnThomas does NOT stand up again. I need a real suggestion as to what could cause that ...

Bros hope this your mistress has not used otumopo for you? Because no sexual active lady will want to leave someone like you oo. Those girls can do everything possible to keep a man.

chysam:
Thank,you for your riddles and jokes,we enjoyed it.

My dear, @40+ I can not squeeze out time for silly jokes.
Am on Nairaland basically everyday for years now, but I hardly comment and have NEVER posted anything before today.
This is something am experiencing presently, as in NOW ...

DonteMec:
Bros I have a concubine outside the country. That is what has kept me in this marriage. Else my wife's low sex drive would have pushed me out of the marriage. It's with the concubine/ girlfriend that I do the drilling or hard work with. With my wife I take it easy as I know her capacity. Problem is that for 2 years and 72 hours prior to my coming back I performed optimally with the said concubine. Then back to my wife, after the first day, all of a sudden my JohnThomas does NOT stand up again. I need a real suggestion as to what could cause that ...

Sincerely, I pity your wife. Your kind of men end up infecting them with all sort of STDs...what makes you think that a side chick who knows whether you're married/not is dating only you? I thought it's for better, for worse? Was a side chick part of the vows?

DonteMec:
Hello Fellow Nairalanders,
I have been a nairalander for years but this would be my first post. I have a very serious problem and I need your wonderful suggestions to guide me along.
I have been married for like Ten years with kids. My wife is a very good, faithful and wonderful lady. I traveled out of the country for 2 years and just came back this last December. However since then I have this rather strange problem, which has never happened prior to this period.
My wife is frigid. She really doesn't like sex. I hate that aspect of her. I have a high sex drive while she has little to zero sex drive. This has of course brought all sorts quarrel over the years. I have since learnt to manage her that way and bear that as my cross, since that is her only weak point. But its not easy.
I made love to my wife the first day I came back. It was all good. But subsequent attempts to make love to her, my penis simply refuses to stand erect. Try everything in the book still it will not stand. It's like the penis is scared of my wife, because even a thought of her makes an erect penis go flat immediately. If I strive to put it in with lots and lots of efforts, hoping it will thicken inside, it will stay for 35 seconds, less than a minute and ejaculate.
I have had to go for tests and it shows no sickness nor venereal disease. But I have gone for an intensive treatment for all kinds of powerful venereal disease, known and unknown for 3 weeks just to leave nothing to chance. After that, the penis started getting up again.
I made love to my wife very powerfully again after the treatment. I lasted for 45 minutes or there about for a round which is my usual style. I was happy that everything is back to normal. However 2 days later we tried to make love again, the penis starts being shy of my wife again. It has been several days since then we have kept on trying, no headway at all. Am confused. The penis simply refuses to stand erect - Jeez this is scary ...
I want to take my wife for a test of her own though she has no symptoms of any illness as I also didn't have prior to all these.
However I want to know:
Is there any venereal disease that is strong enough to paralyze a penis just one day after enjoying it?
Could this be as a result of some other reason or factor which I don't know nor understand?
Note: My wife is a very faithful one and I trust her. However I just want to explore every possibility.
Also note that prior to this I could go for 3 to 5 rounds in a single night, with each round lasting for 45 minutes or there about. Am 41 if you care to know. (Well with my wife its always 1 round of like 1 hour duration)
I love good sex and this is frustrating the hell out of me. Please every kind of advice would be considered, even the weird ones lol

Well let ur wife go for a test first cos an infection from cud also make u lose erection especially bacterial infection. Let us know d outcome of the test.

DonteMec:
Hello Fellow Nairalanders,
I have been a nairalander for years but this would be my first post. I have a very serious problem and I need your wonderful suggestions to guide me along.
I have been married for like Ten years with kids. My wife is a very good, faithful and wonderful lady. I traveled out of the country for 2 years and just came back this last December. However since then I have this rather strange problem, which has never happened prior to this period.
My wife is frigid. She really doesn't like sex. I hate that aspect of her. I have a high sex drive while she has little to zero sex drive. This has of course brought all sorts quarrel over the years. I have since learnt to manage her that way and bear that as my cross, since that is her only weak point. But its not easy.
I made love to my wife the first day I came back. It was all good. But subsequent attempts to make love to her, my penis simply refuses to stand erect. Try everything in the book still it will not stand. It's like the penis is scared of my wife, because even a thought of her makes an erect penis go flat immediately. If I strive to put it in with lots and lots of efforts, hoping it will thicken inside, it will stay for 35 seconds, less than a minute and ejaculate.
I have had to go for tests and it shows no sickness nor venereal disease. But I have gone for an intensive treatment for all kinds of powerful venereal disease, known and unknown for 3 weeks just to leave nothing to chance. After that, the penis started getting up again.
I made love to my wife very powerfully again after the treatment. I lasted for 45 minutes or there about for a round which is my usual style. I was happy that everything is back to normal. However 2 days later we tried to make love again, the penis starts being shy of my wife again. It has been several days since then we have kept on trying, no headway at all. Am confused. The penis simply refuses to stand erect - Jeez this is scary ...
I want to take my wife for a test of her own though she has no symptoms of any illness as I also didn't have prior to all these.
However I want to know:
Is there any venereal disease that is strong enough to paralyze a penis just one day after enjoying it?
Could this be as a result of some other reason or factor which I don't know nor understand?
Note: My wife is a very faithful one and I trust her. However I just want to explore every possibility.
Also note that prior to this I could go for 3 to 5 rounds in a single night, with each round lasting for 45 minutes or there about. Am 41 if you care to know. (Well with my wife its always 1 round of like 1 hour duration)
I love good sex and this is frustrating the hell out of me. Please every kind of advice would be considered, even the weird ones lol

Dem don nack u jazz be dat

Don't mind me I'm just joking
Check you sugar level
And least try to drive at least one bottle of beer a day

Nothing is wrong with you just that you are facing psychological issue. They thought of your wife bn frigid during sex is the issue.
Your wife is the problem and not you and she needs to visit the hospital.

DonteMec:
Thanks for your contribution.
I can't say that the spiritual aspect has not crossed my mind. But I don't really give credence to such thoughts, so I prefer to leave that out of the equation for now.
The psychological aspect is what am seriously thinking could be the problem. Because sorry to say this, my wife is worse than a log of wood in bed. So bedmatically I hate my wife, but apart from that I so much love her. She doesn't know and doesn't want to know anything about sex. She is zero romantically. She has had no improvement since we got married, in fact she has gotten worse. However paradoxically in spite of all these I always want her more than ever. If she likes she could go to sleep and I will be doing my thing. Problem now is that my P has suddenly become shy of her and refuses to respect her presence and that is annoying me so much and causing me real cause for concern. This is just 10 years of marriage. How am I gonna survive the remaining 50 years with her?

In problem solving, u dont rule out any analysis...even if u dont believe in them. You must consider all possible cause(s).

But how can u make love or have sex with someone u are not kissing or someone who isnt kissing u Thats rape and to me its disgusting cos sex should start with romancing, pre-intimacy, kissing before penetra....

This might be your problem; psychological or hope u didn't meet her when she is bleeding

DonteMec:
HA ha ha ha ha, I expected this long ago.
My dear I don't know how old you are. But If you ask your parents how marriages that have lasted for 25 to 50 years are sustained, the things you might hear would make you get wiser.
I love my wife, but I also love good sex. My wife can't give me the good sex. So it's either I divorce my wife or find an alternative measure to save my marriage. This hard decision I took sometime past. Believe me it wasn't and still isn't an easy decision. But a man got to do what a man got to do. However am always very careful of course and that singular decision has made the boat not to rock till now..

Better. Go and ask your concubine what she did to you. It's silly for men to cheat. Women use charms, don't be foolish. I came across a beautician's Facebook page via "suggested post" and while scrolling through, I saw things that shocked me. Please go to Facebook and search for "Queen Skincare". You'll find things like padlock kit and other nonsense. Keep beating your chest that you fckedd outside of your marriage. Nonsense.

DonteMec:
Thanks for your contribution.
I can't say that the spiritual aspect has not crossed my mind. But I don't really give credence to such thoughts, so I prefer to leave that out of the equation for now.
The psychological aspect is what am seriously thinking could be the problem. Because sorry to say this, my wife is worse than a log of wood in bed. So bedmatically I hate my wife, but apart from that I so much love her. She doesn't know and doesn't want to know anything about sex. She is zero romantically. She has had no improvement since we got married, in fact she has gotten worse. However paradoxically in spite of all these I always want her more than ever. If she likes she could go to sleep and I will be doing my thing. Problem now is that my P has suddenly become shy of her and refuses to respect her presence and that is annoying me so much and causing me real cause for concern. This is just 10 years of marriage. How am I gonna survive the remaining 50 years with her?

No don't think that far. Just take care of your health. You need to know what is the source of the problem and take care of it. Your joystick will return. It happened sometimes when you cross age 40 but it might return without any such problem again.

This kind tin dey make me vex 45mins on top of ur wife and u can go 5 rounds a nite. Then why are you complaning don't u know dat too much of every tin is not too good. U wan kill ya self if u kill ya sef ur so-called wife go marry anoda person shekina. Weda u trust her or not will neva stop her not to marry anoda Pen.nis. I will advce u to reduced dat 45mins to 10 or 12mins and reserve ur energy for anoda round.

Start chewing ripe plantains without cooking of any sort.

careytommy7:
You mean you spend close to 4 hours slamming your concubine, is she a nympho?

On a very good - YES I could spend that much time and the concubine is great in that aspect, real great, a perfect match. She is not a nymphomaniac. I once had a nympho years back. Na me run before she finishes me, ha ha ha

LET ur wife go for staphylococcus diagnosis. Maybe she's a carrier of staph. It can affect the rigidity of ur John Thomas.

Check your diet

Bros hope this your mistress has not used otumopo for you? Because no sexual active lady will want to leave someone like you oo. Those girls can do everything possible to keep a man.

Bros,
You don get potential client / abi na fan we go call am join o.
Btw, are you related to MC Hammer ni!? Kilode. Hammering up & down. No wonder yr kini prematurely packed up. Pele.

Zirah:
Better. Go and ask your concubine what she did to you. It's silly for men to cheat. Women use charms, don't be foolish. I came across a beautician's Facebook page via "suggested post" and while scrolling through, I saw things that shocked me. Please go to Facebook and search for "Queen Skincare". You'll find things like padlock kit and other nonsense. Keep beating your chest that you fckedd outside of your marriage. Nonsense.

U n kimbraa really need to chill d fvck out!!!
The wife is dead sexually yet he loves her n didn't divorce her...As a sexually active man...I know what he is going through! He solved d problem and still kept his home...what's with y'all judging him U feminists are always emotional n rarely analytical n it stinks on ya resume!!!!!
If you don't have a solution...keep mum!
Only God knows how many of u can tolerate a sexually dysfunctional husband for ten years!!!

Watch brazzers with your wife.
Let her play a porn role.
It will entice and stimulate your machine to perform outrightly

It could be ur mind,try exercising regularly...it might help clear your mind

DonteMec:
Bros I have a concubine outside the country. That is what has kept me in this marriage. Else my wife's low sex drive would have pushed me out of the marriage. It's with the concubine/ girlfriend that I do the drilling or hard work with. With my wife I take it easy as I know her capacity. Problem is that for 2 years and 72 hours prior to my coming back I performed optimally with the said concubine. Then back to my wife, after the first day, all of a sudden my JohnThomas does NOT stand up again. I need a real suggestion as to what could cause that ...

check your wife...

Bros rest, you are tired. Take sometime eat good food and sleep. You will rejuvenate. But stop going 3 rounds nah. It's putting your body on lots of stress. Mind you are not on early twenty or early thirty.

sugar stick is not meant to go 5 rounds(45mins/round) that can take sugarstick to d grave,naturally if yur joysick go limp after a round let it rest,nobody can force yu to continue to run if u are tired unless she want 2 kill u.advice yursef.

luminouz:
U n kimbraa really need to chill d fvck out!!!
The wife is dead sexually yet he loves her n didn't divorce her...As a sexually active man...I know what he is going through! He solved d problem and still kept his home...what's with y'all judging him U feminists are always emotional n rarely analytical n it stinks on ya resume!!!!!
If you don't have a solution...keep mum!
Only God knows how many of u can tolerate a sexually dysfunctional husband for ten years!!!

Then this is just the beginning of his dick paralysis. You think the side chick doesn't want this idiot person to herself? Foolish people. Foolish thinking.

I had a gf like that, and exact thing happened to me.
My deduction is
Subconsciously u re tired of how ur wife doesn't lyk sex, u begin to take her lyk a sister, lyk ur wife has friend zoned you haha.. Ok seriously when u think abt the stress you wil go tru to make love your p.enis would prefer to be celibate nd let me guess, she doesn't get wet quickly..talk to your wife she may be killing the sex life in the marriage, you may be unaware but you are just tired of doing it with her.

franchasng:
In problem solving, u dont rule out any analysis...even if u dont believe in them. You must consider all possible cause(s).

But how can u make love or have sex with someone u are not kissing or someone who isnt kissing u Thats rape and to me its disgusting cos sex should start with romancing, pre-intimacy, kissing before penetra....

This might be your problem; psychological or hope u didn't meet her when she is bleeding

Bros GBAM. With my wife there is no kissing, no romancing, no moaning; Mouth Action- I deh craze to even expect her to go that length? Yes the truth is that sometimes I feel am making love to a dead body or raping someone. Yet am incapable of raping anyone as my P will pack up once a female shows fear or disgust. My wife has a strength of character and does not display any emotions, not even during sexual intercourse.
Thanks for your advice. I will keep open mind even with the spiritual suggestions ..

luminouz:
U n kimbraa really need to chill d fvck out!!!
The wife is dead sexually yet he loves her n didn't divorce her...As a sexually active man...I know what he is going through! He solved d problem and still kept his home...what's with y'all judging him U feminists are always emotional n rarely analytical n it stinks on ya resume!!!!!
If you don't have a solution...keep mum!
Only God knows how many of u can tolerate a sexually dysfunctional husband for ten years!!!

Why do most of you bring feminism into what feminism shouldn't come in? Has there been a time I told you I was one? That said, was he not aware that they were sexually incompatible before marring him? Nothing justifies cheating. With this your mentality I pity your future wife ohh!.

luminouz:
Shut up!!!
One minute man!
I can last as much as the OP n for as long n I'm not yet dead!!

So swerve..otuoshi

2hrs mins man. U are nothing but a drug addict if not then why ur peni.s dey flop.

Dontemec. I don't think there is any std that can kill libido that fast. What I think is happening is over-familiarity. Funny, right? When a man is used to one woman,at long last, there is nothing exciting anymore so the urge just dies down. But take that man to a new lady and see the zest return with alacrity. Some men goes a round with their wife and fall asleep till morning but if it were to be another woman by their side, they won't sleep all night.
Our company electrician said he hardly get erection with his wife but have massive erection if he is with some other lady. Same discussion came up with some group of guys in a mechanic workshop.
There is nothing wrong with you Bro. Just try spacing sex with ur wife

opomulero101:
it could be stress related.
try doing some exercise & workout in the gym.

so he can continue his 5 rounds,45mins show.DAT guy shd better remain like DAT bf he kills sm1 daughter.

labanj1:
So if you go 5 rounds for 45 minutes each you will have spent 225 minutes (3hrs 45 minutes) on sex. Your thing sef don dey fear you.

. lie lie Mohammed

kimbraa:
Why do most of you bring feminism into what feminism shouldn't come in? Has there been a time I told you I was one? That said, was he not aware that they were sexually incompatible before marring him? Nothing justifies cheating. With this your mentality I pity your future wife ohh!.

Don't pity her...not if ur d one!!!
Cuz I go treat ya fvckup eh!!!