Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / NewStats: 3,194,807 members, 7,956,063 topics. Date: Sunday, 22 September 2024 at 11:13 PM |
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby (4485 Views)
Help: My Wife Wants Another Baby / "God, Bless My Mother With Another Baby" - 5-year-old Boy's Heartwarming Prayers / "I Travelled For 1 Week & My Husband Turned My Kitchen To This" - Woman (2) (3) (4)
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by fekani: 3:52pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
NwanyiAwkaetiti: hmmnn! see advice!! 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by seyenko(m): 3:57pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
Why are you bothering yourself, remove the family planning protection and covertly use another one. Let him keep firing blanks, when he is tired, he will stop Chiamaka789022: 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Nobody: 4:07pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
baby124: cococandy: Women and their fish brain. That's why I had to take a break from here, too much emotional talk with very little deep thinking. How easy is it even for a woman who earns 350k (something they call decent salary in Nigeria) a month to raise 4 kids? The emotional wahala, the physical wahala. What kind of life will 350k give 4 little girl? Cost of schooling, clothes, accommodation, food etc. not to talk of personal needs and household needs, generator, cable, maintenance etc, except she wants the kids to live a struggling life. Women who are always absent from work when their kids fall sick, who will take up the burden if she gets sacked? It's always so easy to advice a woman to exit. Please a woman with this kind of 'load' should not think of exiting except the earns a very very good income. With the way the OP writes, I doubt if she has decent education. @Op, Call your elders let them talk to your husband. Worst case scenario let him go and look for his son from another woman. Don't put yourself under further stress. No reasonable person gives birth to 4 kids these days even if they earn millions monthly. As long as he takes care of his daughters, na him sabi. Stop fighting this battle, a man looking for a male child will go any length, don't kill yourself with high bp and leave you girls motherless, that will be far worse. 5 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by cococandy(f): 4:20pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
If I have a fish brain, then you must have a fishier brain because I bet you would never stay with a woman who is sleeping around and telling you you’re dead to her. Would you stay with such a woman? If yes then welcome to the world of fish brains If no, then choke and suffocate on your own hypocrisy Gaggi: 11 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Nobody: 4:33pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
cococandy: Will you adopt the kids and provide all their needs? If no shut up and come up with a better solution. You can see I even advised her not to kill herself having more kids. 4 is even more than she should have had. Let the man go f**king around to find the chosen heir. He will be the one to have regrets in future. Yes, she should use protection henceforth, no one is against that. No be every time run, run, run. Run for mouth when una dey enjoy the joy of having a partner by your side when raising your kids. You think if it's you, you'll look this pretty with 4 kids and no support even if it's just emotional support? You will age for sure, learn to think properly before talking my dear coco. 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by cococandy(f): 5:04pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
As expected. You can’t say yes or no because your hypocrisy will be revealed. One only enjoys the partnership of a partner who is in it with them. Emotional support of someone who wants you dead? And I’m the one who’s not thinking. What kind of emotional support do you think he will provide to her? Also you assume that she wants to have sex with someone who’s a public property. You show a clear lack of reasoning. As if using protection with him will erase how she feels about his philandering. Would you want to sleep with your wife is she’s sleeping with different men because you have protection? Take your condescending “dear coco” and tell it to yourself . My username is cococandy. Gaggi: 8 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by comtem2011: 5:25pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
ThothHermes:And what happens if complications arise in the process? 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Nobody: 5:52pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
fekani:Yes, I reason outside the box. Those shouting divorce won't b there to comfort her. From d lady's tone it seems are husband is financially capable. No need for unreasonable sentiments. |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by ThothHermes: 5:54pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
comtem2011:I no follow you argue. I just dey tell you something. Complications arise during normal birth also. |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by oluplus(m): 7:53pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
NwanyiAwkaetiti:Like seriously? Now I have seen it all 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by fekani: 8:44pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
NwanyiAwkaetiti: who is showing unreasonable sentiments?I don't talk too much abeg but giving that kind of advice on a public forum says a lot. what if she lost her life in the process? The husband's financial capability will wake her abi? 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Nobody: 8:49pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
fekani:Sir/MA it's a practical advise. I believe strong by faith she can have a son. After all I have an aunt who went for scan and they found only one baby but she held strongly to her faith for a twin and voila! She had twins. |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by ogawisdom(m): 8:58pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
quote author=Chiamaka789022 post=76146753]Gd day everybody i need urgent advice sumting Da has been bothering me 4 sometime now , i dnt ave any1 else 2 talk abt dis , Dis de reason i dcd 2 bring it on here . Please mi brothers and sisters advice me on wat 2 do I ben married for 16 years now , we are blessed wiv 4 daughters 15,14,11 n 8, b4 marriage we has dcd 2 have 4 children only n we promised each oda incase all the children r same gender we will stick 2 4 children rule , so after i had my last gal i did family plaming 4 10yrs so the issue we are having is 2 years ago mi hubby ask me 2 remove the family planning so i culd get pregnant 4 a son then afta delivery do family again, which i told him i cant cuz there is no guarantie dis bby will be a boy , i asked him wat if its anoda gal what we going 2 do , he told me da we will try again until we have a son , so i rejected his proposal so since then there is no peace in mi huse , he has been keeping malice , coming home very late at nite , reject my foods , been cheating wiv so many diff women, i saw texts and Unclad photo of women on his fone . He dsnt make love 2 me , he has deleted all mi pictures includ our wedding ones on all his social media. He has been ignoring me anytime i will try 2 talk 2 him, what really broke mi heart is this last time he posted our girls pics on his fcbk so some of his fcbk frnds asked him what about their mother ( me) , mi husband reply long story mi bro with a sad emotis , so the guy reply bk am sorry 4 ur loss bro may she rest in peace then hubby reply bk thanks bro, i strted crying as soon i saw de msg , i confroted him afta he told me da im dead 2 him da he dsnt have any luv 4 me , i can packed up and leave . So that is what im gng thru in my huse afta refusing 2 have anoda baby please am i wrong wiv my decisions ? Should i go ahead and pleased him? What if is another gal? Pls what should i do?[/quote] U guys should consider adopting a male child after another failed trial. Give it one more trial. Besides how come u are less concerned about not having a male child, are u a witch or sth If u won't cooperate to solve the problem why not leave his house with your girls so he can marry another woman for that purpose |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by danny34(m): 9:28pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
We are Africans, truth be told, most men will never be happy without a male child - ME INCLUSIVE! Do you notice that most who are advising you to divorce are fellow women. As a man this is my candid advice, do sex selection. You n your husband made mistakes not starting early to select your babies gender. So take the family planning off, consult a trusted doctor to guide you. Select a male gender n boom give your family happiness. Its a good thing that both of you seem well to do financially. I got married last year at 29, with is 25. Told with we will try for a boy, she said no, she wants a gal. I SAT HER DOWN N EXPLAIN O. I WANT AN HEIR, 2 SELF, THE EARLIER WE HAVE THEM THE BETTER FOR US O. Tried it n it worked. It can work for you too. |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by eniolorunfe: 10:20pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
danny34: Like you said above, Sex selection or Gender selection is an option for cases like this in this 21st century. Can you give more details about what it entails for others that may be interested, since you have gone through the process? I think it will be helpful information....just saying |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Daeylar(f): 10:45pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
Look at the comments on this thread. Tomorrow someone will ask, "why the need for feminism?" Chiamaka789022:I'm glad to see this. This means there is nothing holding you back. Divorce him and move on. He is a terrible father and a demonic husband. Live your best life dear. We only have one life and it's damn short. 7 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Nobody: 11:05pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
NwanyiAwkaetiti:you can't find out the sex of the child till 2nd trimester, by then it is too late to abort 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Chiamaka789022: 11:24pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
danny34:Thank you I'm interested can you please give more info |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Chiamaka789022: 11:31pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
Daeylar:Thank my dear , I know my heart says the same. But I feel for the kids they love their dad and like seing him around the house. |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by crackhaus: 11:45pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
Chiamaka789022: That Facebook insert is a bit far-fetched and almost undid the entire story for me. However since every other part of your story seems believable, I will offer you my two cents: 1. He has told you to pack up and leave, you could very well do that and be done with him like some of your sympathizers have advised. 2. That you're asking if you should go ahead and please him, means the part of your brain that encourages rational/logical thought is still working perfectly. Summarily, I can only say this & ask you this question: You are in Nigeria, a country in Africa. You married one of those Nigerian men who still place value on having a son, and it isn't just him, there are entire towns & communities in this decade where sons are considered very important...so believe me, you will not be getting a lot of support in the real world. Knowing all this, will your broken marriage be worth it in the end over a "simple" issue of getting/not getting pregnant for a fifth time? Nobody here should make that decision for you...and yes, it is a simple issue, not a life & death situation. But again, your decision only. 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by bukatyne(f): 12:05am On Feb 28, 2019 |
Chiamaka789022: @OP: Since you have not left him with all the adultery, I am figuring that you are going nowhere. Let him get him heir outside and get vibrators to ease your sexual tension (if any). Just know that when the boy comes, all the girls are inconsequential to him so you have to start building a future of them. If you earn well, start opening trusts for them and other things they can inherit. Also be prepared for him to marry the mother of his son or kick you out all together. And also be watchful. He might bring his dream to be a widower a reality. 7 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by NoToPile: 5:21am On Feb 28, 2019 |
Hmmm So if you get pregnant again and its a girl you ll continue trying according to him. What if you dont have a male child after 10 girls what will happen? Besides dont think its the male child issue thats making him cheat and do all sorts, those traits have always been there it just had the right excuse to be expressed. 4 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Chommieblaq(f): 6:29am On Feb 28, 2019 |
I cringe at some of the advice I'm reading here.. A man that publicly agreed you are dead! Cococandy why are wasting your time, she clearly ignored your advice. Op pray for your husband, fast too and don't forget to remove the family planning. Keep trying, if it's a girl abort it and try again, i guess this's exactly what you want to hear. 7 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Lekan1o1: 9:42am On Feb 28, 2019 |
ThothHermes: That's how they do copy and paste Dey go |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Gloriagee(f): 9:57am On Feb 28, 2019 |
yen yen yen. Do you have an idea how old a foetus is before u can check the sex? Or do you actually know what its like to be preggy for the first trimester? I doubt u do cos if u did, u won't be asking a female like u to be getting pregnant and discarding so easily. NwanyiAwkaetiti: 6 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Gloriagee(f): 9:58am On Feb 28, 2019 |
Omo I dey vex o. Imagine if Serena and Venus were aborted? Now, who's ever heard of their male siblings, if they have any. Nonsense and ingredients Chommieblaq: 3 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by cococandy(f): 12:14pm On Feb 28, 2019 |
Yea exactly Chommieblaq: 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by CHoccolaTE: 12:51pm On Feb 28, 2019 |
Wow, if Thai story is true, then wow. Just wow, I don't even know what to say. Many heartless animals in the form of men moving about in this country. Personally sha, knowing how much I love revenge I will document and save evidence of how the man was trying to destroy the marriage and his daughters happiness because of male child. I will make sure I let his daughters know that he placed less value on them for being female and I will really turn them against him and make them hate him. Me I no be prayer and forgiveness type at all. Tufiakwa. 3 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Nobody: 1:02pm On Feb 28, 2019 |
cococandy: If she allows him have his way outside, he will likely stop 'hating'. She doesn't want another child and her partner desperately wants one, what is wrong in that? Let him go outside and get it, after all the burden of care will be on him. This craze of women wanting to keep the man to themselves is why many women discover their husband have kids outside wedlock when he dies. The man wants a kid with his wife and the wife says no, allow him go out then. A woman who has a philandering husband still needs sexual satisfaction and it's only wise to use protection. or are u also suggesting she goes outside to get satisfied? Dear coco, not all women have whoring tendencies, irrespective of their partners behavior. Not all woman are like u liberals who believe whoring is a modern day virtue. |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by Nobody: 1:47pm On Feb 28, 2019 |
Gloriagee:Why doubt? I'm sure it won't come to that though. |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by armyofone(m): 2:38pm On Feb 28, 2019 |
Amaka, your husband is using reversed psychology on you to cover for his f..ucking around. A new wife is coming soon. Having the fifth child in this current world is not encouraged. If the family planning has been good for you with not much side effects, don't take it out. Let him continue farming for a boy child elsewhere. If he is giving you unbearable pain and stress, then it is time to find your way in life. Even if he is rich enough for one more child, remember nothing is constant in life. Four children are enough! 3 Likes |
Re: My Husband Pressuring Me For Another Baby by cococandy(f): 2:50pm On Feb 28, 2019 |
Yes whoring is only a virtue when it’s the man doing it. . This line only works on females that people like you have brainwashed. If you’re not going to treat your woman like you want her to treat you, then STFU. Shameless hypocrite. I’m sure she can get sexual satisfaction from wherever she wants if it comes to that. His peniis is not the only one in the market. YES SHE CAN GO OUTSIDE . There’s nothing wrong with that in your own words. What’s wrong with going outside for something you want if your partner won’t give it to you? Nothing. He can go outside for his extra kid if he wants. She can go outside for whatever else she wants if he won’t give it to her. Sounds fair to me. Gaggi: 9 Likes 1 Share |
QueenzHair: Shop the best quality of Luxurious 100% Human Hairs and wigs here! / Happy Mother's Day To All Nairalanders / Is This Monthly Budget Supposed To Be Enough For My Family
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 108 |