Hello Great People. Long post

I have watched my kids grew and I always have this feeling that something is missing in their formation. I remember how I grew up, being smart, albeit street smart and very conscious of my environment. The current kids, the millennials, seems not to have the same tenacity, doggedness and strength we had growing up. I remember how I walked on the road to buy crates of soft drinks, carried them on my head and brought to my mum's place of business.

My kids' life starts in the morning, after eating their breakfast in an air-conditioned room, an air-conditioned school bus comes to take them to an air-conditioned classrooms. After the school, the school bus drops them at home and the cycle continues.

They don't know what happens in the immediate environment, in the streets and on the road. I deliberately started going out with my eight year old daughter just for her to see how the roads are and how to even have a feel of the outer environment, outside the home or school. Mind you, I still take them out on family outings for sight seeing.

I still have the feeling that something is missing. I see street children and how fast and smart they are with things and reasoning. They move within the neighbourhood and knew everything happening. Mine seems caged and I have been trying to see how to adapt them with the environment.

The other day, I deliberately went to barb hair with my son without using my car. He saw some pigeons picking their foods on the ground. As we got close to the pigeons, of course, they would want to fly off. As they did, my son ran away and started crying. He was so afraid of the pigeons and the speed they flew off on our approach. The other time I walked around with my daughter, she saw goat and it's kids and my daughter refused moving an inch again because of the goats.

Any time I dragged her out for us to stroll, She would be walking on the road without even watching to see if cars were coming. But for those street children, very sharp and attentive to the happenings within their vicinity.

Their current school over pampers them and ensures maximum comfort. I want to start scaling down comfort for them. In my house, I have an inverter and so enjoys 24hours power. There is always light. There was time we had 3 days black out and my inverter got fully discharged. There was no AC. One day, my son was eating and all of a sudden, he started crying and I asked him what happened, he told me he was sweating. My God!, so you were sweating has become the reason to cry?

They always feel over -pampered and entitled to certain things. Agreed that parents should provide their kids with good things but I think this is affecting their formation. It is making them not to see the world reality, that it is not all rosy in this world. I am contemplating enrolling them in public school close by in September, at least, let the "hardening" starts with the school. I am sure they will be more disciplined by those public school teachers than their current private school teacher. I don't believe in AJEBUTTER. I want a well- rounded kids, fully in tune with the society and what life is all about and not being mummy's kids. Luckily, a Catholic church has now set up a Montessori school near by, we are now considering that. It makes more sense as I was also trained by the Catholic school from nursery to secondary.

What do you think? If you have alternative suggestions, please shoot!

Dear mod, help push up to the front page to enable robust discussion.

Still thinking of what to say.

Na Wa O, FinGErS Are Not Equal Sha, But Am Happy You Reason This Way, You Need To Make Dem Strong For The Future, Do Your Kids Do House ChoReS? Why Not Wait Till They Get To SecondaRY Sch Before You Change Their SchS,

Dont change their school. Just allow them roll with small kids from the hood. Watch that they have good friends tho and they will catch up with time. Also keep taking them out and showing them how to meander though the streets. Do not feel overwhelmed cos it may take time for them to adjust.

Like someone already suggested, it's best you change when they're about entering secondary school.
But your kids ain't funny o Crying because of heat and pigeon

Allow them continue with the school but always take them to the village when they are on holidays.

They will meet their mates there in the village, they will play together and one day, fight go burst!!



Your kids then would know there's a big difference between six and half a dozen.

Divay22:
Like someone already suggested, it's best you change when they're about entering secondary school.
But your kids ain't funny o Crying because of heat and pigeon

That heat incidence nearly got me mad. I almost beat a hell out him before my wife held me. What a Bleep! crying because you were sweating why eating? I had to pull off the AC switch permanently. They should contend with ceiling fan

delishpot:
Dont change their school. Just allow them roll with small kids from the hood. Watch that they have good friends tho and they will catch up with time. Also keep taking them out and showing them how to meander though the streets. Do not feel overwhelmed cos it may take time for them to adjust.

Good point. I go evening mass these days with them just to walk unlike the morning service we all go using my car. We started that since last month and I wont stop. After walking a long distance to get to church, my daughter will just be panting as if she ran a marathon , where as I see other children coming from a farther distance without any atom of stress shown in their faces

waleyp:
Na Wa O, FinGErS Are Not Equal Sha, But Am Happy You Reason This Way, You Need To Make Dem Strong For The Future, Do Your Kids Do House ChoReS? Why Not Wait Till They Get To SecondaRY Sch Before You Change Their SchS,

They are eight and seven and my wife hardly allows them. I have instructed them to drop their plates in the kitchen whenever they finish eating rather than keeping it and waiting for Nany. My daughter always try to do her bit in cleaning but my son, very unconcern. Only to cross leg and be watching meeky mouse. I am trying to be tougher these days and they could see it in me

delishpot:
Dont change their school. Just allow them roll with small kids from the hood. Watch that they have good friends tho and they will catch up with time. Also keep taking them out and showing them how to meander though the streets. Do not feel overwhelmed cos it may take time for them to adjust.

If I miss primary school for them, am not gonna miss enrolling them in secondary school.

Focusmind:
Hello Great People. Long post

I have watched my kids grow and I always have this feeling that something is missing in their formation. I remember how I grew up, being smart, albeit street smart and very conscious of my environment. The current kids, the millennial, seems not to have the same tenacity, doggedness and strength we had growing up. I remember how I walk on the road to by creates of soft drink, carry them on my head and brought to my mum's place of business.

My kids' life starts in the morning, after eating their breakfast in an air-conditioned room, an air-conditioned school bus comes to take them to an air-conditioned classroom. After the school, the school bus drops them at home and the cycle continues. They don't know what happens in the environment, in the street and on the road. I deliberately started going out with my six year old daughter just for her to see how the roads are and how to even have a feel of outer environment outside the home or school. Mind you, I still take them out on family outings for sight seeing.

I still have the feeling that something is missing. I see street children and how fast and smart they are with things and reasoning. They move within the neighborhood and know everything happening. Mine seems caged and I have been trying to see how to adapt them with the environment.

The other day, I deliberately went to barb hair with my son without using my car. He saw some pigeons eating. As we got close to the pigeons, off course, they will want to fly off. As they did, my son ran away and started crying. He was so afraid of the pigeons. The other time I walked around with my daughter, she saw goat and her kids and refused moving an inch again because of the goats.

Any time I drag her out for us to stroll, She would be walking on the road without even watching to see if cars are coming. But for those street children, very sharp and attentive to the happenings within their vicinity.

Their current school over pamper them and ensure maximum comfort. I want to start scaling down comfort for them. In my house, I have an inverter and so enjoy 24hours power. There is always light. There was time we had 3 days black out and my inverter got fully discharged. There was no AC. One day, my son was eating and all of a sudden, he started crying and I asked him what happened, he told me he was sweating. My God!, so you were sweating has become the reason to cry?

They always feel over -pampered and entitled to certain things. Agreed that parents should provide their kids with good things but I think this is affecting their formation. It is making them not to see the world reality, that it is not all rosy in this world. I am contemplating enrolling them in public school close by in September, at least, let the "hardening" starts with the school. I am sure they will be more disciplined by those public school teachers than their current private school teacher. I don't believe in AJEBUTTER. I want a well- rounded kids, fully in tune with the society and what life is all about and not being mummy's kids.

What do you think? If you have alternative suggestions, please shoot!

Dear mod, help push up to the front page to enable robust discussion.

Sir you intentions are very clear and reasonable but it could backfire and end up truncating the lives of your kids,your kids are not aware of the roggedities of life which is not really so bad,

Enrolling them in a public school could turn out to become the worst mistake you can ever make in raising ur child, they are already very naive so it would be easier for them to be influenced negatively.

A peace loving and naive ajebutter is faaaaar better than a hardened notorious and street smart ajekpako.

Don't expect your kids to turn out successful just because you did while growing up in the street region.selah

Lol they are your kids and you know what’s best for them, Nigeria is not smiling tho and things are getting rough each day, just figure out things you can do sha however all that being said, when last did u leave ur comfort zone to witness or have a feel of ur environment or the street?When last did u leave ur car at home and decided to take a bus to work or jump Okada abi na to queue at the bus stop? If u know u know?

waleyp:
Lol they are your kids and you know what’s best for them, Nigeria is not smiling tho and things are getting rough each day, just figure out things you can do sha however all that being said, when last did u leave ur comfort zone to witness or have a feel of ur environment or the street?When last did u leave ur car at home and decided to take a bus to work or jump Okada abi na to queue at the bus stop? If u know u know?

I do that regularly. I see walking as a hobby and walk long distances to get to my destination. Most times, I deliberately enter public transport instead of using my car.

so whats the latest about you kids sir? and what have you concluded

waleyp:
so whats the latest about you kids sir? and what have you concluded

They are still in their current school and I may likely start them at the public school near by in September when the new session begins . They will be going there with my 13 year old maid who is already in JS2 in that Lagos government school.

So you would want to remove your kids from a good school where they are receiving quality education to send them a shithole where they would mix up with all kind of lowlifes and eventually graduate as dullards

Sounds like a nice ideal, and then they are grown it’s better you make them attend federal unit or state own and not private uni.. I am just saying my own ooo

You make them Ajebo then want to put them in street to drive home a point. Just be prepared for the hating the less privileged kids will hate on them.

Lol,OP is really funny, anyway having a balanced upbringing is everything.

Focusmind, changing your kids school from their posh school to a public one is too much of a contrast and would affect them psychologically. Integrating them into the environment should be a gradual process.

Instead, find a regular school that is less sophisticated, with minimal amenities, normal good schools without an AC bus services and the likes. They will meet kids like them from good and decent homes, relate easier with them, and won't be drastically affected psychologically.

made2fit:
Focusmind, changing your kids school from their posh school to a public one is too much of a contrast and would affect them psychologically. Integrating them into the environment should be a gradual process.

Instead, find a regular school that is less sophisticated, with minimal amenities, normal good schools without an AC bus services and the likes. They will meet kids like them from good and decent homes, relate easier with them, and won't be drastically affected psychologically.

Seconded

Transferring your kids to a public school is OK. But I want to give you a little advice. You should check for plagiatsprufung at https://edubirdie.com/plagiatsprufung for example and this would help your kids during the study. This is a very useful thing, seriously. Hope that my advice is useful and this would help you a lot.

Be careful what you wish for. Even though you have good wishes for your children, your proposed decision may be extreme and therefore fatal to their development at this stage. Instead of changing schools for them, try to mix up the kind of education they receive. They already have school education, they also have informal education at home. Now, you can enroll them in kids camp to learn other skills. Also, in church/mosque for spiritual education and growth. Then your/your wife's place of business for financial education. Also buy them books that teach life lessons through stories. They will get to learn that the world can be wicked and also learn how to outsmart bad people. Let them watch movies that teach about life, crime, health, family, love, patience, strength, etc. A well-rounded education should be what you seek for them. If you give them that, you will have no course to worry and they will do you proud.

Check out education faqs here: https://naijafaq.com/in/education/

Many Nigerians have this kind of hidden bitterness at their upbringing because it was so harsh.

That heat incidence nearly got me mad. I almost beat a hell out him before my wife held me

After walking a long distance to get to church, my daughter will just be panting as if she ran a marathon

(when I was young) I remember how I walk on the road to by creates of soft drink, carry them on my head

I have watched my kids grow and I always have this feeling that something is missing in their formation

Are you sure your anger problem and disdain for your kids isnt what is making them nervous? You have too much resentment for your kids priviledges. One would wonder what exactly is the essence of Nigerians struggle for money and position when you feel nobody in your circle should not suffer like you did. Just stay in whatever circumstances you grew up in so you can be happier.

The other day, I deliberately went to barb hair with my son without using my car. He saw some pigeons eating. As we got close to the pigeons, off course, they will want to fly off. As they did, my son ran away and started crying. He was so afraid of the pigeons. The other time I walked around with my daughter, she saw goat and her kids and refused moving an inch again because of the goats.

One day, my son was eating and all of a sudden, he started crying and I asked him what happened, he told me he was sweating. My God!, so you were sweating has become the reason to cry?

Tough love

@ Focusmind Just reading this and found the crying over sweating so funny!!
But i felt i should comment because the idea of public sch is a v. bad one. This is because the quality of education in public sch is lower than good private schs. What i d advise is take them to primary schs that are not so high brow but have v good educational standard, infact esp when when they are starting sec schs. Don't take them to Atlantic hall, BIS, take them to ISL, QC-schools that are good In waec rankings but not so cozy. Also, hence forth let them be washing their clothes, plates at home. They should clean up their rooms themselves not the maid, even do things like cleaning the cabinet. Infact by the time the first born is like 13, you shouldn't have an house help. Let them do.everything in the house including cleaning the car and washing your own clothes that are not drycleaned!! Even from now, let them run errands for you in the neighbourhood. Let them go and buy eggs, grind things for their mum. This will build in them an attitude of responsibility- knowing nothing happens just on its own. Depending on your neighbourhood you can encourage them to have friends of all status in that environment. But you need to ensure you instil right principles in them so they can deflect wrong influence from outside. And also you should also monitor their character for any bad influence. You can restrict them from some comfort- like if mum & dad is not around don't put on AC. You can also allow the maid to pick them up with public transport from sch. But pls dont compromise on education quality!!

being:
@ Focusmind Just reading this and found the crying over sweating so funny!!
But i felt i should comment because the idea of public sch is a v. bad one. This is because the quality of education in public sch is lower than good private schs. What i d advise is take them to primary schs that are not so high brow but have v good educational standard, infact esp when when they are starting sec schs. Don't take them to Atlantic hall, BIS, take them to ISL, QC-schools that are good In waec rankings but not so cozy. Also, hence forth let them be washing their clothes, plates at home. They should clean up their rooms themselves not the maid, even do things like cleaning the cabinet. Infact by the time the first born is like 13, you shouldn't have an house help. Let them do.everything in the house including cleaning the car and washing your own clothes that are not drycleaned!! Even from now, let them run errands for you in the neighbourhood. Let them go and buy eggs, grind things for their mum. This will build in them an attitude of responsibility- knowing nothing happens just on its own. Depending on your neighbourhood you can encourage them to have friends of all status in that environment. But you need to ensure you instil right principles in them so they can deflect wrong influence from outside. And also you should also monitor their character for any bad influence. You can restrict them from some comfort- like if mum & dad is not around don't put on AC. You can also allow the maid to pick them up with public transport from sch. But pls dont compromise on education quality!!

Good one - I will surely put them in a very modest school in my area. Considering the current economic situation, it may not even be sustainable for me again to retain them in their current school. The fee is quite high.

Tougher days are ahead of because of Corona and I need to conserve as much fund as possible as recession is on the way.

Focusmind:
Hello Great People. Long post

I have watched my kids grow and I always have this feeling that something is missing in their formation. I remember how I grew up, being smart, albeit street smart and very conscious of my environment. The current kids, the millennial, seems not to have the same tenacity, doggedness and strength we had growing up. I remember how I walk on the road to by creates of soft drink, carry them on my head and brought to my mum's place of business.

My kids' life starts in the morning, after eating their breakfast in an air-conditioned room, an air-conditioned school bus comes to take them to an air-conditioned classroom. After the school, the school bus drops them at home and the cycle continues. They don't know what happens in the environment, in the street and on the road. I deliberately started going out with my six year old daughter just for her to see how the roads are and how to even have a feel of outer environment outside the home or school. Mind you, I still take them out on family outings for sight seeing.

I still have the feeling that something is missing. I see street children and how fast and smart they are with things and reasoning. They move within the neighborhood and know everything happening. Mine seems caged and I have been trying to see how to adapt them with the environment.

The other day, I deliberately went to barb hair with my son without using my car. He saw some pigeons eating. As we got close to the pigeons, off course, they will want to fly off. As they did, my son ran away and started crying. He was so afraid of the pigeons. The other time I walked around with my daughter, she saw goat and her kids and refused moving an inch again because of the goats.

Any time I drag her out for us to stroll, She would be walking on the road without even watching to see if cars are coming. But for those street children, very sharp and attentive to the happenings within their vicinity.

Their current school over pamper them and ensure maximum comfort. I want to start scaling down comfort for them. In my house, I have an inverter and so enjoy 24hours power. There is always light. There was time we had 3 days black out and my inverter got fully discharged. There was no AC. One day, my son was eating and all of a sudden, he started crying and I asked him what happened, he told me he was sweating. My God!, so you were sweating has become the reason to cry?

They always feel over -pampered and entitled to certain things. Agreed that parents should provide their kids with good things but I think this is affecting their formation. It is making them not to see the world reality, that it is not all rosy in this world. I am contemplating enrolling them in public school close by in September, at least, let the "hardening" starts with the school. I am sure they will be more disciplined by those public school teachers than their current private school teacher. I don't believe in AJEBUTTER. I want a well- rounded kids, fully in tune with the society and what life is all about and not being mummy's kids.

What do you think? If you have alternative suggestions, please shoot!

Dear mod, help push up to the front page to enable robust discussion.

Hello... why not enroll your kids for some sporting activities... sports can toughen them up, even if it's martial arts

Xavie:
Hello... why not enroll your kids for some sporting activities... sports can toughen them up, even if it's martial arts

Surprising, they participate actively in sporting event in their school. The last inter house sports held in the school showed their running skills, especially my daughter with her lanky legs. My son is showing a very good promise in Bale dancing but I wouldn't want that. I will prefer to enroll them in martials arts/judo or taekwondo. Thanks for your advice. COVID-19 has put everything on hold

i think its better if the change is done in secondary school