₦airaland Forum

I really feel your pain bro. I am not surprised by the comments I have seen so far, some stating you should have a heart to heart talk with your wife, buy gifts, apologize etc As a married man like you, I am very sure you would have done all these to no avail. Our case is similar just that my wife doesn't deny me sex. This is the point, marriage is not easy for a man. I want you to know one thing, women are very manipulative in marriage irrespective of the number of years you guys spent courting. Marriage is different from dating or courtship. This manipulation is what makes many men divorce or beat their wife. They mostly do this when they have kids (their love and care shifts to the children). The earlier you understand this, the better. All you listed here are all acts of this manipulation.
Solution: Be patient, do your best to try talk to her to change, if she doesnt bulge, carry your cross bro..Ignore her acts, make yourself happy, take care of your health, never report her to any of her family members (mum or dad). Pls, do not divorce or beat her. I repeat again, do what makes you happy and take good care of your health.

Greatdre:
I really feel your pain bro. I am not surprised by the comments I have seen so far, some stating you should have a heart to heart talk with your wife, buy gifts, apologize etc As a married man like you, I am very sure you would have done all these to no avail. Our case is similar just that my wife doesn't deny me sex. This is the point, marriage is not easy for a man. I want you to know one thing, women are very manipulative in marriage irrespective of the number of years you guys spent courting. Marriage is different from dating or courtship. This manipulation is what makes many men divorce or beat their wife. They mostly do this when they have kids (their love and care shifts to the children). The earlier you understand this, the better. All you listed here are all acts of this manipulation.
Solution: Be patient, do your best to try talk to her to change, if she doesnt bulge, carry your cross bro..Ignore her acts, make yourself happy, take care of your health, never report her to any of her family members (mum or dad). Pls, do not divorce or beat her. I repeat again, do what makes you happy and take good care of your health.

Mature. Truth isn't hard to discern

Have you ever cheated on your wife? Or she found out that you cheated on her without you knowing. That is the only thing that will make a woman change or nag.

Don't be in a hurry to judge. The only thing that can change a woman is when you cheat on her and you do not know she is aware.

DukeNija:
You married a wicked woman. Gosh I’m angry I swear. She hoodwinked you into marriage and is now showing her true colors. I say you surprise her. I wish I could give you just a bit of myself. She go come Dey beg you I swear to God.

Bigbayour:
We got married in 2014, and since then things have not been easy. All what my wife dont do while we were courting are now her usuals.

How do I explain a situation my wife nag of everything? Distespect, shout, talk to me anyhow. How do I explain my wife seen washing my cloth (with a washing machine o) as a favour? We do not have intimate talk again. The only time my wife talk to.me heart to heart is when she want to give me the list of bills. And once that is done...she carry her face again.

The worse part of my travail is that she deprive me of sex. Without exaggeration we sometimes go on 3 months sex break...and anytime she allowed me, it would be like by force and its just once.

I am financially ok, living in my own house in lagos,bought a car for her. I am a Chartered Accountant, currently head of Finance/accounts in my company, and I dont think my physique is not presentable to be a husband.

We have 2 kids and I.love her so much.



Mature advice,please

I think you should always create family time for your family.. Take her out and be romantic about it! Always have special time with her if not daily maybe twice or thrice weekly!

DukeNija:
You married a wicked woman. Gosh I’m angry I swear. She hoodwinked you into marriage and is now showing her true colors. I say you surprise her. I wish I could give you just a bit of myself. She go come Dey beg you I swear to God.

Bro, how can I contact you?

yettymuse:
Ubunja, a brother needs detox.

Interesting.

Did you cheat?

Some men do and expect everything to be the same. Some will even claim they can cheat and still love their wives. Have you asked if your wife will still love you after that? Some women may stay because of less palatable options outside of the marriage but they despise the partner.

If you didn’t cheat, then ignore my post

You just spoke my mind!!
I couldn't have said it better!
It seems like there's an increasing trend of women treating their husbands like trash and getting away with it and the lovestruck husbands taking nonsense and empowering rubbish behaviour!
No sex for 3months! And she's still in that house and not sick or bedridden! What nonsense!! Mtcheeeewww

DukeNija:
You don buy market. You still love her so much? Loool.
Your wife is in charge of your home, and your life. She runs it as she deems fit and you can’t do anything about it. 3months without sex? Are you sure you are not under a spell?
No man or woman deserves to be treated this way and not one who provides for his family. You need to take charge of your home. Take control and demand the respect and loyalty you deserve. Shout down, burn down, break down, tear down and destroy whatever stands in the way.
Your wife needs a small dose of your inner demon to bring her back to factory settings. It’s not too late to regain control.
If you have been a good and faithful husband, then you have a right to raise hell. It’s obvious you are a softie, women like this prey on softies. If you want to live long, you need to take action.
From the look of things, it’s very obvious your wife doesn’t love you. probably never did. You might also need to consider walking away if everything fails. People will suggest having a heart to heart with your wife; it’s pointless. You don’t ask or beg for love and respect; you earn it or take it by force.

Greatdre:
I really feel your pain bro. I am not surprised by the comments I have seen so far, some stating you should have a heart to heart talk with your wife, buy gifts, apologize etc As a married man like you, I am very sure you would have done all these to no avail. Our case is similar just that my wife doesn't deny me sex. This is the point, marriage is not easy for a man. I want you to know one thing, women are very manipulative in marriage irrespective of the number of years you guys spent courting. Marriage is different from dating or courtship. This manipulation is what makes many men divorce or beat their wife. They mostly do this when they have kids (their love and care shifts to the children). The earlier you understand this, the better. All you listed here are all acts of this manipulation.
Solution: Be patient, do your best to try talk to her to change, if she doesnt bulge, carry your cross bro..Ignore her acts, make yourself happy, take care of your health, never report her to any of her family members (mum or dad). Pls, do not divorce or beat her. I repeat again, do what makes you happy and take good care of your health.

Best advice so far "do what makes you happy and take good care of your health"

I pray you enjoy your marriage. But which of the house chores do you assist in doing? Does she work? Why should she be the one washing your cloths? Yes she's doing you a favor by washing your cloths. If you like listen to nairaland millenium kids that do not know what marriage is all about. My marriage will soon be 9yrs and I hardly wash for my husband. Yes we have washing machine. I cook, clean, work while he washes every Weekend including my cloths and that of our kids. I only wash few cloths daily expecially when kids wee on themselves. We prepare the kids together in the morning. For example If I'm packing lunch box, he's bathing them.
Gone are the days men sit down and Lord over their wives. If you keep expecting too much you'll continue to get disappointed.
As for the sex part. Pls try to have a discussion with her. I don't want to say I have an idea why she denies you sex, you're the husband find out from her. Let her know the implications and also work on your attitude towards her...

cococandy:
Did you cheat?

Some men do and expect everything to be the same. Some will even claim they can cheat and still love their wives. Have you asked if your wife will still love you after that? Some women may stay because of less palatable options outside of the marriage but they despise the partner.

If you didn’t cheat, then ignore my post

freecocoa:
Okay, I see someone missed me.

Of course na - missed you like kilode? . Along with all the other Family board peeps - as a family man with a strong pastoral inclination, why wouldn't I miss people I genuinely care about? Anyways, make I come chook mouth for your matter? Better run .

TeeVee

Somebody else is banging her
...it's simple.

Bigbayour:
We got married in 2014, and since then things have not been easy. All what my wife dont do while we were courting are now her usuals.

How do I explain a situation my wife nag of everything? Distespect, shout, talk to me anyhow. How do I explain my wife seen washing my cloth (with a washing machine o) as a favour? We do not have intimate talk again. The only time my wife talk to.me heart to heart is when she want to give me the list of bills. And once that is done...she carry her face again.

The worse part of my travail is that she deprive me of sex. Without exaggeration we sometimes go on 3 months sex break...and anytime she allowed me, it would be like by force and its just once.

I am financially ok, living in my own house in lagos,bought a car for her. I am a Chartered Accountant, currently head of Finance/accounts in my company, and I dont think my physique is not presentable to be a husband.

We have 2 kids and I.love her so much.



Mature advice,please

With all you have mentioned, you have endured enough

Just treat her the way she is treating you

Let her fill the heat

If she wants sex give her but sort yourself out

Make sure the kids doesn't lack

Take attention away from her and stop giving her audience

She will enter inside her shell and come out to beg you

Once you have succeeded with this accept her apology and tell her that hence fort

Anytime she becomes naughty you will start yours

Bigbayour:
We got married in 2014, and since then things have not been easy. All what my wife dont do while we were courting are now her usuals.

How do I explain a situation my wife nag of everything? Distespect, shout, talk to me anyhow. How do I explain my wife seen washing my cloth (with a washing machine o) as a favour? We do not have intimate talk again. The only time my wife talk to.me heart to heart is when she want to give me the list of bills. And once that is done...she carry her face again.

The worse part of my travail is that she deprive me of sex. Without exaggeration we sometimes go on 3 months sex break...and anytime she allowed me, it would be like by force and its just once.

I am financially ok, living in my own house in lagos,bought a car for her. I am a Chartered Accountant, currently head of Finance/accounts in my company, and I dont think my physique is not presentable to be a husband.

We have 2 kids and I.love her so much.



Mature advice,please

With all you have mentioned, you have endured enough

Just treat her the way she is treating you

Let her fill the heat

If she wants sex give her but sort yourself out

Make sure the kids doesn't lack

Take attention away from her and stop giving her audience

She will enter inside her shell and come out to beg you

Once you have succeeded with this accept her apology and tell her that hence fort

Anytime she becomes naughty you will start yours

revolt:
Somebody else is banging her
...it's simple.

Stop it, it's all not about banging, she just want to be naughty because the man has enough time and attention on her

Bigbayour:
We got married in 2014, and since then things have not been easy. All what my wife dont do while we were courting are now her usuals.

How do I explain a situation my wife nag of everything? Distespect, shout, talk to me anyhow. How do I explain my wife seen washing my cloth (with a washing machine o) as a favour? We do not have intimate talk again. The only time my wife talk to.me heart to heart is when she want to give me the list of bills. And once that is done...she carry her face again.

The worse part of my travail is that she deprive me of sex. Without exaggeration we sometimes go on 3 months sex break...and anytime she allowed me, it would be like by force and its just once.

I am financially ok, living in my own house in lagos,bought a car for her. I am a Chartered Accountant, currently head of Finance/accounts in my company, and I dont think my physique is not presentable to be a husband.

We have 2 kids and I.love her so much.



Mature advice,please

With all you have mentioned, you have endured enough

Just treat her the way she is treating you

Let her fill the heat

If she wants sex give her but sort yourself out

Make sure the kids doesn't lack

Take attention away from her and stop giving her audience

She will enter inside her shell and come out to beg you

Once you have succeeded with this accept her apology and tell her that hence fort

Anytime she becomes naughty you will start yours

revolt:
Somebody else is banging her
...it's simple.

Stop it, it's all not about banging, she just want to be naughty because the man has enough time and attention on her

Simpleandsweet:
You just spoke my mind!!
I couldn't have said it better!
It seems like there's an increasing trend of women treating their husbands like trash and getting away with it and the lovestruck husbands taking nonsense and empowering rubbish behaviour!
No sex for 3months! And she's still in that house and not sick or bedridden! What nonsense!! Mtcheeeewww

Women has the ability to endure sex

Their sex urge is attached to their emotions, in fact every thing they do is attached to their emotions

Unlike men that can get sex urge even in the hight of tension or stressful situations

Bigbayour:
We got married in 2014, and since then things have not been easy. All what my wife dont do while we were courting are now her usuals.

How do I explain a situation my wife nag of everything? Distespect, shout, talk to me anyhow. How do I explain my wife seen washing my cloth (with a washing machine o) as a favour? We do not have intimate talk again. The only time my wife talk to.me heart to heart is when she want to give me the list of bills. And once that is done...she carry her face again.

The worse part of my travail is that she deprive me of sex. Without exaggeration we sometimes go on 3 months sex break...and anytime she allowed me, it would be like by force and its just once.

I am financially ok, living in my own house in lagos,bought a car for her. I am a Chartered Accountant, currently head of Finance/accounts in my company, and I dont think my physique is not presentable to be a husband.

We have 2 kids and I.love her so much.



Mature advice,please

With all you have mentioned, you have endured enough

Just treat her the way she is treating you

Let her fill the heat

If she wants sex give her but sort yourself out

Make sure the kids doesn't lack

Take attention away from her and stop giving her audience

She will enter inside her shell and come out to beg you

Once you have succeeded with this accept her apology and tell her that hence fort

Anytime she becomes naughty you will start yours

revolt:
Somebody else is banging her
...it's simple.

Stop it, it's all not about banging, she just want to be naughty because the man has enough time and attention on her

Simpleandsweet:
You just spoke my mind!!
I couldn't have said it better!
It seems like there's an increasing trend of women treating their husbands like trash and getting away with it and the lovestruck husbands taking nonsense and empowering rubbish behaviour!
No sex for 3months! And she's still in that house and not sick or bedridden! What nonsense!! Mtcheeeewww

Women has the ability to endure sex

Their sex urge is attached to their emotions, in fact every thing they do is attached to their emotions

Unlike men that can get sex urge even in the hight of tension or stressful situations

islandmoon:
get a side Chic or a second wife

You think getting a second wife is that easy, even with kids from the previous marriage

Look women are the same with similar threats
Just pray you get the one with small wahala

Every man must learn how to manage his wife and that's why they have side chicks

frozen70:
With all you have mentioned, you have endured enough

Just treat her the way she is treating you

Let her fill the heat

If she wants sex give her but sort yourself out

Make sure the kids doesn't lack

Take attention away from her and stop giving her audience

She will enter inside her shell and come out to beg you

Once you have succeeded with this accept her apology and tell her that hence fort

Anytime she becomes naughty you will start yours

Stop it, it's all not about banging, she just want to be naughty because the man has enough time and attention on her

Women has the ability to endure sex

Their sex urge is attached to their emotions, in fact every thing they do is attached to their emotions

Unlike men that can get sex urge even in the hight of tension or stressful situations

You think getting a second wife is that easy, even with kids from the previous marriage

Look women are the same with similar threats
Just pray you get the one with small wahala

Every man must learn how to manage his wife and that's why they have side chicks

lol. I know you're trying to protect a sister. I'm telling you a woman doesnt do that except her heart and body is outside. Since were talking about lagos here...then somebody is pounding that.

R

Bigbayour:
R

Good afternoon

How is your marriage now?

You deserve a bottle of Heineken . You just spoke all I had in mind

DukeNija:
You don buy market. You still love her so much? Loool.
Your wife is in charge of your home, and your life. She runs it as she deems fit and you can’t do anything about it. 3months without sex? Are you sure you are not under a spell?
No man or woman deserves to be treated this way and not one who provides for his family. You need to take charge of your home. Take control and demand the respect and loyalty you deserve. Shout down, burn down, break down, tear down and destroy whatever stands in the way.
Your wife needs a small dose of your inner demon to bring her back to factory settings. It’s not too late to regain control.
If you have been a good and faithful husband, then you have a right to raise hell. It’s obvious you are a softie, women like this prey on softies. If you want to live long, you need to take action.
From the look of things, it’s very obvious your wife doesn’t love you. probably never did. You might also need to consider walking away if everything fails. People will suggest having a heart to heart with your wife; it’s pointless. You don’t ask or beg for love and respect; you earn it or take it by force.

DukeNija:
You don buy market. You still love her so much? Loool.
Your wife is in charge of your home, and your life. She runs it as she deems fit and you can’t do anything about it. 3months without sex? Are you sure you are not under a spell?
No man or woman deserves to be treated this way and not one who provides for his family. You need to take charge of your home. Take control and demand the respect and loyalty you deserve. Shout down, burn down, break down, tear down and destroy whatever stands in the way.
Your wife needs a small dose of your inner demon to bring her back to factory settings. It’s not too late to regain control.
If you have been a good and faithful husband, then you have a right to raise hell. It’s obvious you are a softie, women like this prey on softies. If you want to live long, you need to take action.
From the look of things, it’s very obvious your wife doesn’t love you. probably never did. You might also need to consider walking away if everything fails. People will suggest having a heart to heart with your wife; it’s pointless. You don’t ask or beg for love and respect; you earn it or take it by force.

D only sensible comments so far but the man ll never take it into action. Is so annoying how some tolerate shitt from their wives. At least show her the demon �� in U once a while so that she can't take U for granted.

Born2Breed:
A woman only behaves like this if 1)There is someone else in the picture. 2) You did something that has really offended her.

Sit her down and talk but start like this...Present her with a gift and then start the conversation with an apology..."pet name" ( I know I might have offended you,please forgive me...)

I don’t understand why he should do the bolded from the OP?

merahki:
I don’t understand why he should do the bolded from the OP?

If its number 2.

FeminineSniper:
You people keep giving smelly advice.

Let me ask pretty quick, what right does a woman have over her body to think that she decides when and when not to have sex with her husband, same goes for the husband too?.

Asking the man always to sit the woman down and ask and even apologise, is that part of how a relationship should be.... Don't women have responsibilities too in marriage or a relationship?

No problem, make una kontinue

You said this for the shock value and not because you meant it right? Please don’t tell me you really feel this way?

The OP’s wife clearly doesn’t love or can’t stand her husband physically. In this case he should decide what to do. She clearly isn’t doing again. I wonder how he later dealt with the issue. Get the @ Richy4 to counsel him to grovel more to his wife?
Because surely that causes love to grow instead of being demeaning and self-erasing