₦airaland Forum

charlesELIKIBA:
HELLP NAIRALANDERS

I will be brief with my writeup as much as possible so I can explain my connection with this lady.

My single mom gave me away at a tender age of 5 to her elder brother (financial difficulties i assume), this ''aunty'' happens to be the wife of this my mother's elder brother.

Aready they had 4 children, all boys.

The home was a tough upbringing with strict rules about socialising, we weren't allowed to bring friends home or go to friends places. It was pretty strict and my uncles wife i would say was the mastermind of it all, she was strict and mean maybe because it was a house of 5 boys.

Growing up in my uncles home, I wouldn't say I was treated diffrently because I always got matching outfits with my uncle's children during christmas, gifts during christmas, same portions of food BUT IN ALL I was always scared of doing somethings my cousins would do. I didn't feel free growing up, i felt diffrent from them. In some cases they attended the best schools than I (but I never attended a govt. school or a bad private school).

It's like if their school fees was 1m naira per term, mine would be 150,000 per term.

I lived with them until I was about 16 or 17 and one morning I woke up and they said i was going back to my mother at 15 or 16 like any kid, you would start to develop conscience (sense), maybe breaking some rules and being stubborn just like their own kids. This I assume was why they wanted to send me back to my mother OTHERWISE I CAN THINK OF NOTHING ELSE I DID WRONG OR DIFFRENT.

In all of these years living with them, I saw my mother as a strange person. I had no motherly connection with her. My anty to me, was my real mother. Whenever we went visiting my mother in very rare occasions, it was always awkward.

Well long story short, I found myself back in my mother's arms, to a new environment i knew nothing about and starting to learn to live with a woman called my mother. I was naive, had no choice but to accept realities on ground. Do you know that feeling of living in a pouch house and wake up next morning in a 1 room surrounded by thick bushes. Yes that was the change.

I was enrolled into a school, my uncle was repeatedly forced to send/ pay my schoolfees until i was in ss3 and i called him to inform him about waec enrolment. He told me on the phone ''all the exams i have been writing, how many have i passed'' and that was it. He never sent a dime anymore meanwhile at this point his children, my cousins were already miles ahead of me suddenly in education. When i left the home, the eldest son went to canada to school, the second who is my agemate was already in a private uni in Nigeria and the 3rd who i am senior to with a year is preparing to go to ukraine for school and years later the last born who i spoonfed and chewed meat for attended uni in Ghana.

Well long story short, since my uncle had failed me. My mother said it was time i go to my father. My father was old retired pensioner. My mother took me to him, as expected awkward encounter. I have never known this man, no memory of him. Well he said he would find my enrolment money and he did, he later passed on a year or two later.

I enrolled waec and pased in one sitting, thanks to miracle centres.

PS: i must say i was never an intelligent student. i wasn't even average but i wasn't the poorest and neither of my uncles children were better. We were all poor educationally.

Long story short another uncle sprang up and paid for my university diploma which i later acquiried.


YEARS LATER my uncle and aunty decided to move back to our home town, please note the home my mother stayed in was this my uncles home. It was the boy quarters, the main house was not even in sight as at the time i was returned to my mother. We did series of bush clearing and snakes killing lol. well my uncle returned home town after retirement and setup the main structure ( a 5 bed room duplex) and thats were they lived while i and my mother lived in the BQ.

I WAS very angry with myself that i happened to still live with them AGAIN, i needed to get out of their sight, my condition was bad. i was a mere teacher to some rickety school. In all of this my uncle's wife always ensured she knew what i was upto and she derived satisfaction when she knew i wasn't doing better than her kids who were all abroad. i turned to their errand boy again after years of neglect. i was very angry with myself and needed to save to get out of the house.

Well i did manage to save up and leave the house and i promised myself never to return to that house. i felt neglected, i felt they sent me away because the goodthings were coming and they couldn't bear to see me share in them because to me they were my parents.


YEARS LATER, my aunty was sick with cancer
please note before i left the home, my uncle and aunty always sent me to travel journeys to get them medicines from a monastry. i attended such trips severally and ran other seperate errands but i never dared to drive their car talkless ask for the key. i always washed their car in the mornings, i would never also dare to see myself in the living room of the duplex with the remote in hand. when they moved back to the hometown, that fear in my childhood started again but this time i was mature enough to know i would never m amount to anything in life if i continued this again hence the reason i needed to move out.

So my aunty sickness grew worse, the husband flew her to india and back but the sickness grew worse. in all of this cancer times i never went back to the house to see her. I only heard of her conditions from my siblings (my half siblings, my mother was married to 3 men in diffrent years and she had only me for my father, another for another man and 3 for another man, i was the lastborn of all).

Then my aunty died. The day she died, i saw her in my dreams and she was crying saying ''she forgave me''. A day or two later i went to my sisters store and she told me of my aunty death, i went to my rented apartment and cried profusely. i later summouned courage and maybe sympathy and went to my uncles house and i cried before my uncle and told him to forgive me too for all abandoning them all this while.

NOW ABOUT MY AUNTY SAYING SHE FORGAVE ME IN THE DREAM: i did not do her any wrong neither did i wish death on her. All her life her greatest fear was maybe i would become greater than her children. She loved these comparisms, i was never wicked to her, i never cursed her, i was never rude to her unless i some instances when she sends me errands and i tell her i have other things to do.... Otherwise i never was negative to her instead she is the one nobody likes, by nobody i mean my uncles family. Nobody talks good of her, they say she controls my uncle and also squandered his money but in all of this i never spoke of my experiences living with them and somethings they did wrong that made me feel diffrent, i did not even tell you guys neither have i told my mother ever. i don't see them as anything that would stop my growth in life. i hate to talk about the bad in people.

WELL BACK TO REASON THE TOPIC WAS CREATED, why do i keep repeatedly seeing her in my dreams even after her death and its always on a negative role. its either in the dream she still plays mother, or she is gossip about me in the dream or she is against me in the dream, just think of anything negative in a dream and she will be the mastermind. This is really beginning to worry me. Why is she still attached to me in the dreams?

After she died, her husband, my uncle started his own sickness but has been sick for years now, he is bed ridden. The family has repeatedly asked him if there is anything he and his late wife did in the past to amount such sickness were he is living in pain but refused to die and he would not answer. One time they said, he said ''it was out of ignorance'' and thats all he ever said about anything.

It will also be good to note that of all my 4 cousin brothers and i today, i am the most successful by far.

i just finished my house (a 3bedroom, 2 bedroom, 1 bedrrom bungalow)
january this year i bought my 3rd car.
i travel round the world effortlessly.
YES I DID TURN OUT FAR BETTER THAN MY COUSINS WHO YOU KNOW HAD THE BEST EDUCATION.

I don't want to talk of their conditions, lets concentrate on me.


So this is my much writeup... I had to skip many things so you can bear to read but please be free to ask me questions.

Why do I repeatedly see my aunty in my dreams.... just before this writeup, i had just woken up from another dream she was present in, she was whispering to the ears of a very good friend of mine and then the friends turned to me and was like '' ah cahrles na so you be''?...and i was angry and was like '' how can you believe something someone you just met told you against i your best friends word'' and minutes later dream ended and i woke up.

At this point i am thinking of going spiritual to know why this is happening but this will be a first in my life. There are two popular places i have never being in my life until lately last year... One is a shrine and the other is a police station. Last year was my first time to be in a police station.
I was driving my unregistered car. That was my offence.

Ok.

holusormi:
Oloriburuku ni yin sir !! - see why I keep saying it , leave these family assholes and stop helping them - they will find a way to make you bad - stupid cunt!!!

Sir, with all due respect, it does not resort to insulting me. My bad and my apologies.

It was done out of pure love. Do have a nice day.

holusormi:
Do you have kids yet ?
With the amount of stupidity inside you , I advise you should hold off child bearing for the next 10 years ish , maybe the gods will have mercy on you and you will be wiser by then - stupid , ungrateful , monkey-brained cunt !!!!

Yea, you probably have someone's child you guys are mistreating under your watch naw. So because you helping train your siblings kid, you have to put them down? Your wife is probably maltreating another's child under your care.. Better wake up.

ModestGal:
I Disagree

You disagree on what exactly?

It's simply obvious many people have wickedness running in their veins. I'm not surprised afterall we read news of their atrocities here every day!

Those who are pure in heart with good emotional standing with spot the wickedness in this story.

Personally I love my siblings, so when I become rich and it arises that I have to take their kids under my wings, I'll do so without bile, with same love as my own kids. I'll want to see them succeed just like my kids. Cos I know if I better their lives, they'll in turn care for their parent(my sibling). It's really not that hard to be good.

Get close to your aunt's family and support her sick husband and her children.
She played some positive roles in your upbringing even though she gave here children better, but she did something for you.
God has blessed you, so extend to them this blessings from God.
Ensure you don't soil your hands with anything evil or fetish.
Also take good care of your mum.

sisisioge:
Hmmmm....inside life!

1. Your Uncle and Aunty really tried for you. They collectively did more than your parents did so you should be very grateful to them. Get this and stop being bitter about it, it will help you further release yourself and them.

2. Comparing yourself to their kids shouldn't even happen...they weren't your parents, they were nice people who took you in. I understand how you might have felt differently though...thank goodness it was in the past. Everyone is running a different race...you apparently still think you and your cousins are still on the same track hence your conscious and subconscious comparison. Free your mind...move on and you will stop seeing their mother gossiping in your dream.

3. In your hearts of heart you still think you didn't quite do enough for them, hence the reason you kept dreaming about her. Free you mind, talk to a therapist if you have too or pray and speak with her in your spirit. You did nothing wrong... Have that conversation in your mind, believe it and move on.

May God bless you with peace...peace supersedes any other thing in this dear life.

I don’t know if you understand Yoruba o but “oro oni opolo lo so o” you spoke wisely

Destiny cannot be changed .... you are a pure sample

however it's ur mind doing all the dreaming

I have part of your experience although it was after my uni. I was not helped out if fear of surpassing her children

I also dream of her too.

it's destiny and God at work to prove himself the maker of men.

Don't repay the bad just keep the good heart and remember to do good to their children children

God has used them as ur foundation to greater heights

Mrnairalandd:
I totally disagreed with you Mr man, it’s sheer wickedness to choose to drop a boy when he needed them most. Why didn’t they stop their own children from enrolling for Waec?

It’s wickedness!!! Pure wickedness!!! As Iran writing this, it just occurred to me that you are probably a very wicked person to support this madness. Only a wicked person ll tell an innocent teen who was dropped in the wilderness when he needed his uncle to ignore and move on.

honestly sometimes I feel nairaland is a bad place to seek opinions except for a few who are right thinking.

SweetCunt97:
It's simply obvious many people have wickedness running in their veins. I'm not surprised afterall we read news of their atrocities here every day!

Those who are pure in heart with good emotional standing with spot the wickedness in this story.

Personally I love my siblings, so when I become rich and it arises that I have to take their kids under my wings, I'll do so without bile, with same love as my own kids. I'll want to see them succeed just like my kids. Cos I know if I better their lives, they'll in turn care for their parent(my sibling). It's really not that hard to be good.

You will understand afterwards when you are painted to be using the child's destiny after all your effort. You will understand when you hear about how you maltreat the child because of a one day punishment for the child's misbehaviour. Everything go clear for your eyes when your pastor start telling you the child's is a witch and shes the reason why you are falling sick and having malaria that is actually caused by not using insecticide net.
And when they tell the child you are behind his/her predicament or when the mother start seeing you in dreams and they take you to their pastor or Alfa and they start interpreting the dreams for them.
In this case, no one is at fault but the society and African fetish nonsense. And the uncle is no way wicked to the op, op was just an unfortunate circumstance of African beliefs of how such children would be bastards.

I can also do that for my siblings because we do not come from a fetish, stupid, fairy tale thinking family who believe in thrashes. Our mother have already taught us to distant ourselves from future seer's, Alfas, Pastors or any spiritual nonsense people. Even, dreams are to be prayed on and forgotten because they can be true and also very false. And also, we do not harbour laziness, neither are my siblings poor that I would need to collect their child from them. In fact, I'm the poorest of my siblings and I'm not ready to give birth to children that wouldn't be well catered for.

Op dm me I will tell you what you need to do to banish such dreams. The dead and the living have nothing in common

Vulcan24:
Destiny cannot be changed .... you are a pure sample

however it's ur mind doing all the dreaming

I have part of your experience although it was after my uni. I was not helped out if fear of surpassing her children

I also dream of her too.

it's destiny and God at work to prove himself the maker of men.

Don't repay the bad just keep the good heart and remember to do good to their children children

God has used them as ur foundation to greater heights

Fear of surpassing her children'' please how do you know this? Do you live in her mind? The reason you think this way is because subconsciously, you are already in competition with the children, which is not your fault and quite natural for children to be in competition, but becomes a sickness when you take it to your adults life.

Tf

Professorcplus:
By their words ye shall know them. Every word you type dispute of envy, bitterness, competition, comparison which is a bad sign of poor mental health

Lets turn the table around. Imagine you as a man bear responsibilities of a child owned by two irresponsible adult as a result of their wayward life style.

Made sure the child wasn't starved, was clothed, given quality education and still insist his wife must treat you like her child and not a slave. Made you part of his family even when no one cares about you.

Only for this child to grow up and blame you for his misfortunes...

You are ungrateful. The education the man invested in you is a waste. He brought you up to add value to the society but you choose to constitute nuisance to the society.

He didn't train you to compare you with his children.
He didn't train you to compete with his children.
He didn't train you to become a bitter man.
He has given you every basic need of life.
He trained you to become a good dad, good husband and supporting man, and reciprocate the love he showed you but you choose to hatred.

I will advise you to have a positive mental attitude towards their kids and people around you and stop comparing your success to their.

God bless you. Kai! Nairaland still has hope with people like you. I saw a lot of ninnies condoling the mentally slow OP with over bloated entitlement mentality. Nigerians are not a people anyone should help. My dad was killed by his cousin (she confessed on her death bed) and her reason was that my dad sent his son away from his home. My dad trained the boh from when he was 5 till he was 25. A 25 year old who refused to further his education or take up a skill. He smoked and fought for a living. He was later killed in a robbery operations in Kogi State a year after his mom/savior passed.

charlesELIKIBA:
HELLP NAIRALANDERS

I will be brief with my writeup as much as possible so I can explain my connection with this lady.

My single mom gave me away at a tender age of 5 to her elder brother (financial difficulties i assume), this ''aunty'' happens to be the wife of this my mother's elder brother.

Aready they had 4 children, all boys.

The home was a tough upbringing with strict rules about socialising, we weren't allowed to bring friends home or go to friends places. It was pretty strict and my uncles wife i would say was the mastermind of it all, she was strict and mean maybe because it was a house of 5 boys.

Growing up in my uncles home, I wouldn't say I was treated diffrently because I always got matching outfits with my uncle's children during christmas, gifts during christmas, same portions of food BUT IN ALL I was always scared of doing somethings my cousins would do. I didn't feel free growing up, i felt diffrent from them. In some cases they attended the best schools than I (but I never attended a govt. school or a bad private school).

It's like if their school fees was 1m naira per term, mine would be 150,000 per term.

I lived with them until I was about 16 or 17 and one morning I woke up and they said i was going back to my mother at 15 or 16 like any kid, you would start to develop conscience (sense), maybe breaking some rules and being stubborn just like their own kids. This I assume was why they wanted to send me back to my mother OTHERWISE I CAN THINK OF NOTHING ELSE I DID WRONG OR DIFFRENT.

In all of these years living with them, I saw my mother as a strange person. I had no motherly connection with her. My anty to me, was my real mother. Whenever we went visiting my mother in very rare occasions, it was always awkward.

Well long story short, I found myself back in my mother's arms, to a new environment i knew nothing about and starting to learn to live with a woman called my mother. I was naive, had no choice but to accept realities on ground. Do you know that feeling of living in a pouch house and wake up next morning in a 1 room surrounded by thick bushes. Yes that was the change.

I was enrolled into a school, my uncle was repeatedly forced to send/ pay my schoolfees until i was in ss3 and i called him to inform him about waec enrolment. He told me on the phone ''all the exams i have been writing, how many have i passed'' and that was it. He never sent a dime anymore meanwhile at this point his children, my cousins were already miles ahead of me suddenly in education. When i left the home, the eldest son went to canada to school, the second who is my agemate was already in a private uni in Nigeria and the 3rd who i am senior to with a year is preparing to go to ukraine for school and years later the last born who i spoonfed and chewed meat for attended uni in Ghana.

Well long story short, since my uncle had failed me. My mother said it was time i go to my father. My father was old retired pensioner. My mother took me to him, as expected awkward encounter. I have never known this man, no memory of him. Well he said he would find my enrolment money and he did, he later passed on a year or two later.

I enrolled waec and pased in one sitting, thanks to miracle centres.

PS: i must say i was never an intelligent student. i wasn't even average but i wasn't the poorest and neither of my uncles children were better. We were all poor educationally.

Long story short another uncle sprang up and paid for my university diploma which i later acquiried.


YEARS LATER my uncle and aunty decided to move back to our home town, please note the home my mother stayed in was this my uncles home. It was the boy quarters, the main house was not even in sight as at the time i was returned to my mother. We did series of bush clearing and snakes killing lol. well my uncle returned home town after retirement and setup the main structure ( a 5 bed room duplex) and thats were they lived while i and my mother lived in the BQ.

I WAS very angry with myself that i happened to still live with them AGAIN, i needed to get out of their sight, my condition was bad. i was a mere teacher to some rickety school. In all of this my uncle's wife always ensured she knew what i was upto and she derived satisfaction when she knew i wasn't doing better than her kids who were all abroad. i turned to their errand boy again after years of neglect. i was very angry with myself and needed to save to get out of the house.

Well i did manage to save up and leave the house and i promised myself never to return to that house. i felt neglected, i felt they sent me away because the goodthings were coming and they couldn't bear to see me share in them because to me they were my parents.


YEARS LATER, my aunty was sick with cancer
please note before i left the home, my uncle and aunty always sent me to travel journeys to get them medicines from a monastry. i attended such trips severally and ran other seperate errands but i never dared to drive their car talkless ask for the key. i always washed their car in the mornings, i would never also dare to see myself in the living room of the duplex with the remote in hand. when they moved back to the hometown, that fear in my childhood started again but this time i was mature enough to know i would never m amount to anything in life if i continued this again hence the reason i needed to move out.

So my aunty sickness grew worse, the husband flew her to india and back but the sickness grew worse. in all of this cancer times i never went back to the house to see her. I only heard of her conditions from my siblings (my half siblings, my mother was married to 3 men in diffrent years and she had only me for my father, another for another man and 3 for another man, i was the lastborn of all).

Then my aunty died. The day she died, i saw her in my dreams and she was crying saying ''she forgave me''. A day or two later i went to my sisters store and she told me of my aunty death, i went to my rented apartment and cried profusely. i later summouned courage and maybe sympathy and went to my uncles house and i cried before my uncle and told him to forgive me too for all abandoning them all this while.

NOW ABOUT MY AUNTY SAYING SHE FORGAVE ME IN THE DREAM: i did not do her any wrong neither did i wish death on her. All her life her greatest fear was maybe i would become greater than her children. She loved these comparisms, i was never wicked to her, i never cursed her, i was never rude to her unless i some instances when she sends me errands and i tell her i have other things to do.... Otherwise i never was negative to her instead she is the one nobody likes, by nobody i mean my uncles family. Nobody talks good of her, they say she controls my uncle and also squandered his money but in all of this i never spoke of my experiences living with them and somethings they did wrong that made me feel diffrent, i did not even tell you guys neither have i told my mother ever. i don't see them as anything that would stop my growth in life. i hate to talk about the bad in people.

WELL BACK TO REASON THE TOPIC WAS CREATED, why do i keep repeatedly seeing her in my dreams even after her death and its always on a negative role. its either in the dream she still plays mother, or she is gossip about me in the dream or she is against me in the dream, just think of anything negative in a dream and she will be the mastermind. This is really beginning to worry me. Why is she still attached to me in the dreams?

After she died, her husband, my uncle started his own sickness but has been sick for years now, he is bed ridden. The family has repeatedly asked him if there is anything he and his late wife did in the past to amount such sickness were he is living in pain but refused to die and he would not answer. One time they said, he said ''it was out of ignorance'' and thats all he ever said about anything.

It will also be good to note that of all my 4 cousin brothers and i today, i am the most successful by far.

i just finished my house (a 3bedroom, 2 bedroom, 1 bedrrom bungalow)
january this year i bought my 3rd car.
i travel round the world effortlessly.
YES I DID TURN OUT FAR BETTER THAN MY COUSINS WHO YOU KNOW HAD THE BEST EDUCATION.

I don't want to talk of their conditions, lets concentrate on me.


So this is my much writeup... I had to skip many things so you can bear to read but please be free to ask me questions.

Why do I repeatedly see my aunty in my dreams.... just before this writeup, i had just woken up from another dream she was present in, she was whispering to the ears of a very good friend of mine and then the friends turned to me and was like '' ah cahrles na so you be''?...and i was angry and was like '' how can you believe something someone you just met told you against i your best friends word'' and minutes later dream ended and i woke up.

At this point i am thinking of going spiritual to know why this is happening but this will be a first in my life. There are two popular places i have never being in my life until lately last year... One is a shrine and the other is a police station. Last year was my first time to be in a police station.
I was driving my unregistered car. That was my offence.

Check into Montain On Fire

charlesELIKIBA:
you my friend are a horror movie
either way thanks
I am guided

better
can be of help if u finally decide on going spiritual

charlesELIKIBA:
all kicking great

oh NO!

sisisioge:
Hmmmm....inside life!

1. Your Uncle and Aunty really tried for you. They collectively did more than your parents did so you should be very grateful to them. Get this and stop being bitter about it, it will help you further release yourself and them.

2. Comparing yourself to their kids shouldn't even happen...they weren't your parents, they were nice people who took you in. I understand how you might have felt differently though...thank goodness it was in the past. Everyone is running a different race...you apparently still think you and your cousins are still on the same track hence your conscious and subconscious comparison. Free your mind...move on and you will stop seeing their mother gossiping in your dream.

3. In your hearts of heart you still think you didn't quite do enough for them, hence the reason you kept dreaming about her. Free you mind, talk to a therapist if you have too or pray and speak with her in your spirit. You did nothing wrong... Have that conversation in your mind, believe it and move on.

May God bless you with peace...peace supersedes any other thing in this dear life.

You obviously think the best of people, but I think in this case you're wrong. His Uncle and Aunty did not try for him. They took him from his mom when he was only 4years old. His mom did not ask for their charity. If they take a child, a whole human being and not a sack of rice, then they should treat him with the same love they show their kids. Returning him after secondary school makes no sense whatsoever. He has no bond with his own biological family as he does not really know them. He grew up calling his aunt "mom". Then he was sent to unfamiliar territory.

charlesELIKIBA:
honestly sometimes I feel nairaland is a bad place to seek opinions except for a few who are right thinking.

Lol, so you think you will get a professional advice from groups of strangers.
Well, I know how you feel Op, especially when you were a teen, again, you should blame your Nigerian Society. In this part of the world, people live in fear of taking a child not theirs.
You will understand this when you do the same and your friends start giving you useless advice of how the child you have taken in would be the end of your progress.
Considering your aunt was an old woman, she would get so many advice from useless set of people, and maybe your mother was also doing as if they stole you from her, they taught it was best to return you to them.

People like you in advanced countries would live the rest of their lives helping children leaving with care givers, not by giving them money, but by helping them understand their situation, their anger, and frustration.

This your write up has inspired me to add another fight to my cause, I have added adoption awareness to things I would start working on, I have also added helping children living with people not their real parents. It is a lot of mental stress for those innocent teenagers and thats why you are having those dreams.

I know as African, you won't want to see a psychologist because you all are stubborn. But please do see one or read on your problem on google to solve your psychological anxiety problem.

charlesELIKIBA:
HELLP NAIRALANDERS

I will be brief with my writeup as much as possible so I can explain my connection with this lady.

My single mom gave me away at a tender age of 5 to her elder brother (financial difficulties i assume), this ''aunty'' happens to be the wife of this my mother's elder brother.

Aready they had 4 children, all boys.

The home was a tough upbringing with strict rules about socialising, we weren't allowed to bring friends home or go to friends places. It was pretty strict and my uncles wife i would say was the mastermind of it all, she was strict and mean maybe because it was a house of 5 boys.

Growing up in my uncles home, I wouldn't say I was treated diffrently because I always got matching outfits with my uncle's children during christmas, gifts during christmas, same portions of food BUT IN ALL I was always scared of doing somethings my cousins would do. I didn't feel free growing up, i felt diffrent from them. In some cases they attended the best schools than I (but I never attended a govt. school or a bad private school).

It's like if their school fees was 1m naira per term, mine would be 150,000 per term.

I lived with them until I was about 16 or 17 and one morning I woke up and they said i was going back to my mother at 15 or 16 like any kid, you would start to develop conscience (sense), maybe breaking some rules and being stubborn just like their own kids. This I assume was why they wanted to send me back to my mother OTHERWISE I CAN THINK OF NOTHING ELSE I DID WRONG OR DIFFRENT.

In all of these years living with them, I saw my mother as a strange person. I had no motherly connection with her. My anty to me, was my real mother. Whenever we went visiting my mother in very rare occasions, it was always awkward.

Well long story short, I found myself back in my mother's arms, to a new environment i knew nothing about and starting to learn to live with a woman called my mother. I was naive, had no choice but to accept realities on ground. Do you know that feeling of living in a pouch house and wake up next morning in a 1 room surrounded by thick bushes. Yes that was the change.

I was enrolled into a school, my uncle was repeatedly forced to send/ pay my schoolfees until i was in ss3 and i called him to inform him about waec enrolment. He told me on the phone ''all the exams i have been writing, how many have i passed'' and that was it. He never sent a dime anymore meanwhile at this point his children, my cousins were already miles ahead of me suddenly in education. When i left the home, the eldest son went to canada to school, the second who is my agemate was already in a private uni in Nigeria and the 3rd who i am senior to with a year is preparing to go to ukraine for school and years later the last born who i spoonfed and chewed meat for attended uni in Ghana.

Well long story short, since my uncle had failed me. My mother said it was time i go to my father. My father was old retired pensioner. My mother took me to him, as expected awkward encounter. I have never known this man, no memory of him. Well he said he would find my enrolment money and he did, he later passed on a year or two later.

I enrolled waec and pased in one sitting, thanks to miracle centres.

PS: i must say i was never an intelligent student. i wasn't even average but i wasn't the poorest and neither of my uncles children were better. We were all poor educationally.

Long story short another uncle sprang up and paid for my university diploma which i later acquiried.


YEARS LATER my uncle and aunty decided to move back to our home town, please note the home my mother stayed in was this my uncles home. It was the boy quarters, the main house was not even in sight as at the time i was returned to my mother. We did series of bush clearing and snakes killing lol. well my uncle returned home town after retirement and setup the main structure ( a 5 bed room duplex) and thats were they lived while i and my mother lived in the BQ.

I WAS very angry with myself that i happened to still live with them AGAIN, i needed to get out of their sight, my condition was bad. i was a mere teacher to some rickety school. In all of this my uncle's wife always ensured she knew what i was upto and she derived satisfaction when she knew i wasn't doing better than her kids who were all abroad. i turned to their errand boy again after years of neglect. i was very angry with myself and needed to save to get out of the house.

Well i did manage to save up and leave the house and i promised myself never to return to that house. i felt neglected, i felt they sent me away because the goodthings were coming and they couldn't bear to see me share in them because to me they were my parents.


YEARS LATER, my aunty was sick with cancer
please note before i left the home, my uncle and aunty always sent me to travel journeys to get them medicines from a monastry. i attended such trips severally and ran other seperate errands but i never dared to drive their car talkless ask for the key. i always washed their car in the mornings, i would never also dare to see myself in the living room of the duplex with the remote in hand. when they moved back to the hometown, that fear in my childhood started again but this time i was mature enough to know i would never m amount to anything in life if i continued this again hence the reason i needed to move out.

So my aunty sickness grew worse, the husband flew her to india and back but the sickness grew worse. in all of this cancer times i never went back to the house to see her. I only heard of her conditions from my siblings (my half siblings, my mother was married to 3 men in diffrent years and she had only me for my father, another for another man and 3 for another man, i was the lastborn of all).

Then my aunty died. The day she died, i saw her in my dreams and she was crying saying ''she forgave me''. A day or two later i went to my sisters store and she told me of my aunty death, i went to my rented apartment and cried profusely. i later summouned courage and maybe sympathy and went to my uncles house and i cried before my uncle and told him to forgive me too for all abandoning them all this while.

NOW ABOUT MY AUNTY SAYING SHE FORGAVE ME IN THE DREAM: i did not do her any wrong neither did i wish death on her. All her life her greatest fear was maybe i would become greater than her children. She loved these comparisms, i was never wicked to her, i never cursed her, i was never rude to her unless i some instances when she sends me errands and i tell her i have other things to do.... Otherwise i never was negative to her instead she is the one nobody likes, by nobody i mean my uncles family. Nobody talks good of her, they say she controls my uncle and also squandered his money but in all of this i never spoke of my experiences living with them and somethings they did wrong that made me feel diffrent, i did not even tell you guys neither have i told my mother ever. i don't see them as anything that would stop my growth in life. i hate to talk about the bad in people.

WELL BACK TO REASON THE TOPIC WAS CREATED, why do i keep repeatedly seeing her in my dreams even after her death and its always on a negative role. its either in the dream she still plays mother, or she is gossip about me in the dream or she is against me in the dream, just think of anything negative in a dream and she will be the mastermind. This is really beginning to worry me. Why is she still attached to me in the dreams?

After she died, her husband, my uncle started his own sickness but has been sick for years now, he is bed ridden. The family has repeatedly asked him if there is anything he and his late wife did in the past to amount such sickness were he is living in pain but refused to die and he would not answer. One time they said, he said ''it was out of ignorance'' and thats all he ever said about anything.

It will also be good to note that of all my 4 cousin brothers and i today, i am the most successful by far.

i just finished my house (a 3bedroom, 2 bedroom, 1 bedrrom bungalow)
january this year i bought my 3rd car.
i travel round the world effortlessly.
YES I DID TURN OUT FAR BETTER THAN MY COUSINS WHO YOU KNOW HAD THE BEST EDUCATION.

I don't want to talk of their conditions, lets concentrate on me.


So this is my much writeup... I had to skip many things so you can bear to read but please be free to ask me questions.

Why do I repeatedly see my aunty in my dreams.... just before this writeup, i had just woken up from another dream she was present in, she was whispering to the ears of a very good friend of mine and then the friends turned to me and was like '' ah cahrles na so you be''?...and i was angry and was like '' how can you believe something someone you just met told you against i your best friends word'' and minutes later dream ended and i woke up.

At this point i am thinking of going spiritual to know why this is happening but this will be a first in my life. There are two popular places i have never being in my life until lately last year... One is a shrine and the other is a police station. Last year was my first time to be in a police station.
I was driving my unregistered car. That was my offence.

I like to read stories like this ...how people succeed despite all odds. You are a good example ..Clear conscience fears no accusation . If you are sure you 've no hand in her death , don't bother yourself ....just fast and pray and she will disappear. Again , I would like to 've your contact...whatsap me on 08062593234...I would like to talk about travelling the whole world like you....May be through u I can get out of this hell

holusormi:
Oloriburuku ni yin sir !! - see why I keep saying it , leave these family assholes and stop helping them - they will find a way to make you bad - stupid cunt!!!

Doesn't mean there are no fetish uncles and aunts. You sir

That woman is obviously a very significant person in your life and that's why you keep seeing her in your dreams. I'll bet it's all physiological, that's all. I relate with a lot of your experience. This life sha. Whatever you do, avoid shrines and any other devil stuff. The devil is very tricky, one day you'll now be lying sick on the bed and people will be asking you what you did in the past to cause it. Just keep your hands and heart clean

charlesELIKIBA:
HELLP NAIRALANDERS

I will be brief with my writeup as much as possible so I can explain my connection with this lady.

My single mom gave me away at a tender age of 5 to her elder brother (financial difficulties i assume), this ''aunty'' happens to be the wife of this my mother's elder brother.

Aready they had 4 children, all boys.

The home was a tough upbringing with strict rules about socialising, we weren't allowed to bring friends home or go to friends places. It was pretty strict and my uncles wife i would say was the mastermind of it all, she was strict and mean maybe because it was a house of 5 boys.

Growing up in my uncles home, I wouldn't say I was treated diffrently because I always got matching outfits with my uncle's children during christmas, gifts during christmas, same portions of food BUT IN ALL I was always scared of doing somethings my cousins would do. I didn't feel free growing up, i felt diffrent from them. In some cases they attended the best schools than I (but I never attended a govt. school or a bad private school).

It's like if their school fees was 1m naira per term, mine would be 150,000 per term.

I lived with them until I was about 16 or 17 and one morning I woke up and they said i was going back to my mother at 15 or 16 like any kid, you would start to develop conscience (sense), maybe breaking some rules and being stubborn just like their own kids. This I assume was why they wanted to send me back to my mother OTHERWISE I CAN THINK OF NOTHING ELSE I DID WRONG OR DIFFRENT.

In all of these years living with them, I saw my mother as a strange person. I had no motherly connection with her. My anty to me, was my real mother. Whenever we went visiting my mother in very rare occasions, it was always awkward.

Well long story short, I found myself back in my mother's arms, to a new environment i knew nothing about and starting to learn to live with a woman called my mother. I was naive, had no choice but to accept realities on ground. Do you know that feeling of living in a pouch house and wake up next morning in a 1 room surrounded by thick bushes. Yes that was the change.

I was enrolled into a school, my uncle was repeatedly forced to send/ pay my schoolfees until i was in ss3 and i called him to inform him about waec enrolment. He told me on the phone ''all the exams i have been writing, how many have i passed'' and that was it. He never sent a dime anymore meanwhile at this point his children, my cousins were already miles ahead of me suddenly in education. When i left the home, the eldest son went to canada to school, the second who is my agemate was already in a private uni in Nigeria and the 3rd who i am senior to with a year is preparing to go to ukraine for school and years later the last born who i spoonfed and chewed meat for attended uni in Ghana.

Well long story short, since my uncle had failed me. My mother said it was time i go to my father. My father was old retired pensioner. My mother took me to him, as expected awkward encounter. I have never known this man, no memory of him. Well he said he would find my enrolment money and he did, he later passed on a year or two later.

I enrolled waec and pased in one sitting, thanks to miracle centres.

PS: i must say i was never an intelligent student. i wasn't even average but i wasn't the poorest and neither of my uncles children were better. We were all poor educationally.

Long story short another uncle sprang up and paid for my university diploma which i later acquiried.


YEARS LATER my uncle and aunty decided to move back to our home town, please note the home my mother stayed in was this my uncles home. It was the boy quarters, the main house was not even in sight as at the time i was returned to my mother. We did series of bush clearing and snakes killing lol. well my uncle returned home town after retirement and setup the main structure ( a 5 bed room duplex) and thats were they lived while i and my mother lived in the BQ.

I WAS very angry with myself that i happened to still live with them AGAIN, i needed to get out of their sight, my condition was bad. i was a mere teacher to some rickety school. In all of this my uncle's wife always ensured she knew what i was upto and she derived satisfaction when she knew i wasn't doing better than her kids who were all abroad. i turned to their errand boy again after years of neglect. i was very angry with myself and needed to save to get out of the house.

Well i did manage to save up and leave the house and i promised myself never to return to that house. i felt neglected, i felt they sent me away because the goodthings were coming and they couldn't bear to see me share in them because to me they were my parents.


YEARS LATER, my aunty was sick with cancer
please note before i left the home, my uncle and aunty always sent me to travel journeys to get them medicines from a monastry. i attended such trips severally and ran other seperate errands but i never dared to drive their car talkless ask for the key. i always washed their car in the mornings, i would never also dare to see myself in the living room of the duplex with the remote in hand. when they moved back to the hometown, that fear in my childhood started again but this time i was mature enough to know i would never m amount to anything in life if i continued this again hence the reason i needed to move out.

So my aunty sickness grew worse, the husband flew her to india and back but the sickness grew worse. in all of this cancer times i never went back to the house to see her. I only heard of her conditions from my siblings (my half siblings, my mother was married to 3 men in diffrent years and she had only me for my father, another for another man and 3 for another man, i was the lastborn of all).

Then my aunty died. The day she died, i saw her in my dreams and she was crying saying ''she forgave me''. A day or two later i went to my sisters store and she told me of my aunty death, i went to my rented apartment and cried profusely. i later summouned courage and maybe sympathy and went to my uncles house and i cried before my uncle and told him to forgive me too for all abandoning them all this while.

NOW ABOUT MY AUNTY SAYING SHE FORGAVE ME IN THE DREAM: i did not do her any wrong neither did i wish death on her. All her life her greatest fear was maybe i would become greater than her children. She loved these comparisms, i was never wicked to her, i never cursed her, i was never rude to her unless i some instances when she sends me errands and i tell her i have other things to do.... Otherwise i never was negative to her instead she is the one nobody likes, by nobody i mean my uncles family. Nobody talks good of her, they say she controls my uncle and also squandered his money but in all of this i never spoke of my experiences living with them and somethings they did wrong that made me feel diffrent, i did not even tell you guys neither have i told my mother ever. i don't see them as anything that would stop my growth in life. i hate to talk about the bad in people.

WELL BACK TO REASON THE TOPIC WAS CREATED, why do i keep repeatedly seeing her in my dreams even after her death and its always on a negative role. its either in the dream she still plays mother, or she is gossip about me in the dream or she is against me in the dream, just think of anything negative in a dream and she will be the mastermind. This is really beginning to worry me. Why is she still attached to me in the dreams?

After she died, her husband, my uncle started his own sickness but has been sick for years now, he is bed ridden. The family has repeatedly asked him if there is anything he and his late wife did in the past to amount such sickness were he is living in pain but refused to die and he would not answer. One time they said, he said ''it was out of ignorance'' and thats all he ever said about anything.

It will also be good to note that of all my 4 cousin brothers and i today, i am the most successful by far.

i just finished my house (a 3bedroom, 2 bedroom, 1 bedrrom bungalow)
january this year i bought my 3rd car.
i travel round the world effortlessly.
YES I DID TURN OUT FAR BETTER THAN MY COUSINS WHO YOU KNOW HAD THE BEST EDUCATION.

I don't want to talk of their conditions, lets concentrate on me.


So this is my much writeup... I had to skip many things so you can bear to read but please be free to ask me questions.

Why do I repeatedly see my aunty in my dreams.... just before this writeup, i had just woken up from another dream she was present in, she was whispering to the ears of a very good friend of mine and then the friends turned to me and was like '' ah cahrles na so you be''?...and i was angry and was like '' how can you believe something someone you just met told you against i your best friends word'' and minutes later dream ended and i woke up.

At this point i am thinking of going spiritual to know why this is happening but this will be a first in my life. There are two popular places i have never being in my life until lately last year... One is a shrine and the other is a police station. Last year was my first time to be in a police station.
I was driving my unregistered car. That was my offence.

If I were the admin, this stupid thread wouldnt have made it to nairaland, let alone FP.
As a matter of fact, this is the most useless piece I have read this month. Do u know what it means to train a child that is not urs? Even if I think he backed out half way, he was magnanimous at least at the time. All I kept seeing in ur write up was 'his children attended uni in... I didn't attend uni in' , his children this, me that.... In fact, u r ungrateful.
Further, I want u to know that the fact u think u have money is not a measure for success. Time changes everything.
I will not have time to address who ever is hunting u in dreams. Deal with that.

The worst is that, his mom won't know him either. The mom may even love her other children more than him. It's messed up man. I still haven't fully recovered.

sweetrace:
You obviously think the best of people, but I think in this case you're wrong. His Uncle and Aunty did not try for him. They took him from his mom when he was only 4years old. His mom did not ask for their charity. If they take a child, a whole human being and not a sack of rice, then they should treat him with the same love they show their kids. Returning him after secondary school makes no sense whatsoever. He has no bond with his own biological family as he does not really know them. He grew up calling his aunt "mom". Then he was sent to unfamiliar territory.

ModestGal:
You will understand afterwards when you are painted to be using the child's destiny after all your effort. You will understand when you hear about how you maltreat the child because of a one day punishment for the child's misbehaviour. Everything go clear for your eyes when your pastor start telling you the child's is a witch and shes the reason why you are falling sick and having malaria that is actually caused by not using insecticide net.
And when they tell the child you are behind his/her predicament or when the mother start seeing you in dreams and they take you to their pastor or Alfa and they start interpreting the dreams for them.
In this case, no one is at fault but the society and African fetish nonsense. And the uncle is no way wicked to the op, op was just an unfortunate circumstance of African beliefs of how such children would be bastards.

I can also do that for my siblings because we do not come from a fetish, stupid, fairy tale thinking family who believe in thrashes. Our mother have already taught us to distant ourselves from future seer's, Alfas, Pastors or any spiritual nonsense people. Even, dreams are to be prayed on and forgotten because they can be true and also very false. And also, we do not harbour laziness, neither are my siblings poor that I would need to collect their child from them. In fact, I'm the poorest of my siblings and I'm not ready to give birth to children that wouldn't be well catered for.

Good Submission but doesn't take away the reality on ground. People will keep birthing kids they can't care for, religion will keep breaking family ties and diabolical people will keep doing what they do best.

Oga, for God almighty sake, please visit a pastor, a good one you know very well and if you can't, do a three day fasting with prayer and at the third day, give alms.... Then thank God later....

charlesELIKIBA:
thanks so much but I really don't feel that guilt like you said. I already begged my uncle to forgive me for that when I payed him a condolence visit. so I don't think I have that guilt

... and with my uncles illness now I am doing things way more differently maybe not at full force but it's different.

I am a happy man in life, it's just this persistent dreams of her and she's always negative in this dreams, that's my problem now. like someone said earlier, I shouldn't have any business with the dead in my dreams, not when I didn't have even the slightest wish for her death.

charlesELIKIBA:
oh wow.
this has got to be my best read so far.
you maybe right about comparison because sometimes I feel anything my cousins are today is out of their fathers wealth and not a fresh beginning like mine. that's the only comparison I can think of
truth is for me I have blamed my own mother the most, you know for giving me out.
to be honest if I have anger for anyone on if I was treated differently, that anger will be on my mother.
and this has affected our mother, son relationship.... it's not there at all.
I am beginning to think I know what to do.

it's just poped on me after reading what you wrote. maybe my uncles wife is expecting of me like a son because I have refused to recognise my mother as my true mother. just maybe this is the connection that needs to be broken. I need to love my mother more and unconditionally.

I think I need to talk to my mother about how i feel. oh boy can belive I am teary just writing this sentence. I feel this is it really.

MODIFIED: I FINALLY SPOKE TO MY MOM ABOUT IT.

I spoke to my mother today and she said my cousins were crying they wanted me to stay with them at their base (this was after she and I, I was 4yrs old when we visited them the first time.)
at that time my cousins were 5yrs, 4yrs and 3yrs respectively.

so when they revisited hometown, on their way back to the base the kids were crying uncontrollably and my uncle and the wife couldn't bear it anymore and they had to turn back to come pick me up.

she said it wasn't that she couldn't care for me in a own little or do we say penury way (even tho I still feel as a mother she could have insisted the most but she did it of freewill. if you can't trust anybody with your kid at least not your blood brother)(but she has a history of her kids not spend childhood with her, so I find it as a cheap excuse from her)

years later she said she ask my uncle why he returned me and he said it was the devils work.

we just had this discussion tonight and all this while I tot she just begged them to cater for me.

You and I are 99% the same. I'm not sure your recent talk with your mom will make all the resentment go away permanently but I hope the best for you and her. My family experience is almost identical with yours but I won't go into detail here. This is your post. I'm glad for your success though. I hope it works our well for me too.

You need to see a shrink

Professorcplus:
By their words ye shall know them. Every word you type dispute of envy, bitterness, competition, comparison which is a bad sign of poor mental health

Lets turn the table around. Imagine you as a man bear responsibilities of a child owned by two irresponsible adult as a result of their wayward life style.

Made sure the child wasn't starved, was clothed, given quality education and still insist his wife must treat you like her child and not a slave. Made you part of his family even when no one cares about you.

Only for this child to grow up and blame you for his misfortunes...

You are ungrateful. The education the man invested in you is a waste. He brought you up to add value to the society but you choose to constitute nuisance to the society.

He didn't train you to compare you with his children.
He didn't train you to compete with his children.
He didn't train you to become a bitter man.
He has given you every basic need of life.
He trained you to become a good dad, good husband and supporting man, and reciprocate the love he showed you but you choose to hatred.

I will advise you to have a positive mental attitude towards their kids and people around you and stop comparing your success to their.

fineboynl:
I just did. read it up again as I expatiate. when you keep seeing someone at the negative side of your dreams. and very frequently known that its not coincidence. it means that did diabolic things on you. even if they died you will never stop seeing them.

which trybe what she?

Stop thinking about her
Ur imagination is tricking u

charlesELIKIBA:
did you read what I wrote, if at all did you read to the end?
did you read the part I said this said uncle refused to pay my waec enrolment fee?
and how another uncle steps up to ensure I had a higher degree.
or you have comprehending disability?

Oga go and sit down. The man tried, and you have no reason whatever to expect more because you were a liability to him. He didn't pay you waec and you have a sense of entitlement. Na him born you? some parents can't even train their children.

charlesELIKIBA:
HELLP NAIRALANDERS

I will be brief with my writeup as much as possible so I can explain my connection with this lady.

My single mom gave me away at a tender age of 5 to her elder brother (financial difficulties i assume), this ''aunty'' happens to be the wife of this my mother's elder brother.

Aready they had 4 children, all boys.

The home was a tough upbringing with strict rules about socialising, we weren't allowed to bring friends home or go to friends places. It was pretty strict and my uncles wife i would say was the mastermind of it all, she was strict and mean maybe because it was a house of 5 boys.

Growing up in my uncles home, I wouldn't say I was treated diffrently because I always got matching outfits with my uncle's children during christmas, gifts during christmas, same portions of food BUT IN ALL I was always scared of doing somethings my cousins would do. I didn't feel free growing up, i felt diffrent from them. In some cases they attended the best schools than I (but I never attended a govt. school or a bad private school).

It's like if their school fees was 1m naira per term, mine would be 150,000 per term.

I lived with them until I was about 16 or 17 and one morning I woke up and they said i was going back to my mother at 15 or 16 like any kid, you would start to develop conscience (sense), maybe breaking some rules and being stubborn just like their own kids. This I assume was why they wanted to send me back to my mother OTHERWISE I CAN THINK OF NOTHING ELSE I DID WRONG OR DIFFRENT.

In all of these years living with them, I saw my mother as a strange person. I had no motherly connection with her. My anty to me, was my real mother. Whenever we went visiting my mother in very rare occasions, it was always awkward.

Well long story short, I found myself back in my mother's arms, to a new environment i knew nothing about and starting to learn to live with a woman called my mother. I was naive, had no choice but to accept realities on ground. Do you know that feeling of living in a pouch house and wake up next morning in a 1 room surrounded by thick bushes. Yes that was the change.

I was enrolled into a school, my uncle was repeatedly forced to send/ pay my schoolfees until i was in ss3 and i called him to inform him about waec enrolment. He told me on the phone ''all the exams i have been writing, how many have i passed'' and that was it. He never sent a dime anymore meanwhile at this point his children, my cousins were already miles ahead of me suddenly in education. When i left the home, the eldest son went to canada to school, the second who is my agemate was already in a private uni in Nigeria and the 3rd who i am senior to with a year is preparing to go to ukraine for school and years later the last born who i spoonfed and chewed meat for attended uni in Ghana.

Well long story short, since my uncle had failed me. My mother said it was time i go to my father. My father was old retired pensioner. My mother took me to him, as expected awkward encounter. I have never known this man, no memory of him. Well he said he would find my enrolment money and he did, he later passed on a year or two later.

I enrolled waec and pased in one sitting, thanks to miracle centres.

PS: i must say i was never an intelligent student. i wasn't even average but i wasn't the poorest and neither of my uncles children were better. We were all poor educationally.

Long story short another uncle sprang up and paid for my university diploma which i later acquiried.


YEARS LATER my uncle and aunty decided to move back to our home town, please note the home my mother stayed in was this my uncles home. It was the boy quarters, the main house was not even in sight as at the time i was returned to my mother. We did series of bush clearing and snakes killing lol. well my uncle returned home town after retirement and setup the main structure ( a 5 bed room duplex) and thats were they lived while i and my mother lived in the BQ.

I WAS very angry with myself that i happened to still live with them AGAIN, i needed to get out of their sight, my condition was bad. i was a mere teacher to some rickety school. In all of this my uncle's wife always ensured she knew what i was upto and she derived satisfaction when she knew i wasn't doing better than her kids who were all abroad. i turned to their errand boy again after years of neglect. i was very angry with myself and needed to save to get out of the house.

Well i did manage to save up and leave the house and i promised myself never to return to that house. i felt neglected, i felt they sent me away because the goodthings were coming and they couldn't bear to see me share in them because to me they were my parents.


YEARS LATER, my aunty was sick with cancer
please note before i left the home, my uncle and aunty always sent me to travel journeys to get them medicines from a monastry. i attended such trips severally and ran other seperate errands but i never dared to drive their car talkless ask for the key. i always washed their car in the mornings, i would never also dare to see myself in the living room of the duplex with the remote in hand. when they moved back to the hometown, that fear in my childhood started again but this time i was mature enough to know i would never m amount to anything in life if i continued this again hence the reason i needed to move out.

So my aunty sickness grew worse, the husband flew her to india and back but the sickness grew worse. in all of this cancer times i never went back to the house to see her. I only heard of her conditions from my siblings (my half siblings, my mother was married to 3 men in diffrent years and she had only me for my father, another for another man and 3 for another man, i was the lastborn of all).

Then my aunty died. The day she died, i saw her in my dreams and she was crying saying ''she forgave me''. A day or two later i went to my sisters store and she told me of my aunty death, i went to my rented apartment and cried profusely. i later summouned courage and maybe sympathy and went to my uncles house and i cried before my uncle and told him to forgive me too for all abandoning them all this while.

NOW ABOUT MY AUNTY SAYING SHE FORGAVE ME IN THE DREAM: i did not do her any wrong neither did i wish death on her. All her life her greatest fear was maybe i would become greater than her children. She loved these comparisms, i was never wicked to her, i never cursed her, i was never rude to her unless i some instances when she sends me errands and i tell her i have other things to do.... Otherwise i never was negative to her instead she is the one nobody likes, by nobody i mean my uncles family. Nobody talks good of her, they say she controls my uncle and also squandered his money but in all of this i never spoke of my experiences living with them and somethings they did wrong that made me feel diffrent, i did not even tell you guys neither have i told my mother ever. i don't see them as anything that would stop my growth in life. i hate to talk about the bad in people.

WELL BACK TO REASON THE TOPIC WAS CREATED, why do i keep repeatedly seeing her in my dreams even after her death and its always on a negative role. its either in the dream she still plays mother, or she is gossip about me in the dream or she is against me in the dream, just think of anything negative in a dream and she will be the mastermind. This is really beginning to worry me. Why is she still attached to me in the dreams?

After she died, her husband, my uncle started his own sickness but has been sick for years now, he is bed ridden. The family has repeatedly asked him if there is anything he and his late wife did in the past to amount such sickness were he is living in pain but refused to die and he would not answer. One time they said, he said ''it was out of ignorance'' and thats all he ever said about anything.

It will also be good to note that of all my 4 cousin brothers and i today, i am the most successful by far.

i just finished my house (a 3bedroom, 2 bedroom, 1 bedrrom bungalow)
january this year i bought my 3rd car.
i travel round the world effortlessly.
YES I DID TURN OUT FAR BETTER THAN MY COUSINS WHO YOU KNOW HAD THE BEST EDUCATION.

I don't want to talk of their conditions, lets concentrate on me.


So this is my much writeup... I had to skip many things so you can bear to read but please be free to ask me questions.

Why do I repeatedly see my aunty in my dreams.... just before this writeup, i had just woken up from another dream she was present in, she was whispering to the ears of a very good friend of mine and then the friends turned to me and was like '' ah cahrles na so you be''?...and i was angry and was like '' how can you believe something someone you just met told you against i your best friends word'' and minutes later dream ended and i woke up.

At this point i am thinking of going spiritual to know why this is happening but this will be a first in my life. There are two popular places i have never being in my life until lately last year... One is a shrine and the other is a police station. Last year was my first time to be in a police station.
I was driving my unregistered car. That was my offence.

Come on Chalse, I am glad at the end of the long piece you gave us here.
My gladness stems from the fact: You turned out a success irrespective of the suppression.

On the dreams and your uncle's wife, ITS ALL IN YOUR HEAD.
YOU ARE EXCESSIVELY ENGROSSED WITH TJE PAST.

LET IT GO.

BUY ITEMS AND TAKE TO YOUR UNCLE. He is still instrumental to your success. If you hadn't moved to the city at n early age and from that point developed the interest to be a great man or Urban caliber, you couldn't have found it eazy to emerge the way you are today.
Imagine if you lived in the village from birth to Tweety before moving out of the village, you would not had had the much mental pictures you carried in your head of urban life at teenage age.

GOD WHO ALWAYS WIPE THE TEARS OF THE MALTREATED WANTS YOU TO LOVE AND NOT HATE- EVEN YOU SURPOSED ENEMIES.

NOW, SHOW YOUR UNCLE LOVE AND FORGET THE PAST.
YOUR "AUNTY" WILL HAVE NOTHING AGAINST YOU.

GOD CONTINUE TO FAVOUR YOU.

Good day

What I will say is if your cousins needs help and you can help them do not hesitate to help them.. No grudges just be happy with them and forget the past...