Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,150,312 members, 7,808,054 topics. Date: Thursday, 25 April 2024 at 06:09 AM

How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? - Travel (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Travel / How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? (64036 Views)

How Did You Obtain Your Permanent Residency In Your Current Country? / How Did You Feel The First Day You Travelled Abroad? / Living In The Uk/life As A UK Immigrant (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) ... (14) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by pretydiva(f): 12:28pm On Mar 08, 2021
This is part of the reason while most married men leave their wives behind. Don't know the evil spirit that usually gets hold of them when they go abroad

13 Likes

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by medriano: 12:30pm On Mar 08, 2021
Very sad one. His best bet is to move back to Nigeria. From what you wrote, your friend is depressed and might be suicidal.
Let him return home and be with his family,they’ll take care of him and make him feel better. He will always see his kids....not immediately though.
I wish him strength and happiness.

5 Likes

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by seunmsg(m): 12:30pm On Mar 08, 2021
Like I always say, marriage is overrated. It is just an arrangement of convenience that can crash at any time. Men especially should never lose guide while in it. When shit hits like in the case of this man, that’s when you will realize all the “I love you I love” na scam. The other gender will so deal with you without even blinking.

I read somewhere this morning that Jeff Bozos ex-wife has remarried. This lady skimmed Bezos off billions of dollars only to go and marry a teacher who she can control.

Men must take care of their family while not neglecting themselves at the same time. If you live in a country like the UK, start keeping part of your income in Nigeria or any other country where the UK law has not jurisdiction over. Make sure you’ve a fallback plan just in case of marital failure. We all read Ebue’s sad story. We must all be guided.

34 Likes

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by bolkay4: 12:31pm On Mar 08, 2021
Michelle55:
How do people who vows to take the forever steps together suddenly turns against each other overnight? Just how?
Because it's a lie to begin with.
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by GeneralPula: 12:32pm On Mar 08, 2021
.
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by iHart(m): 12:32pm On Mar 08, 2021
His family members here in Nigeria will also suffer, no more free money.
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by MansoryMX(m): 12:33pm On Mar 08, 2021
Michelle55:
How do people who vows to take the forever steps together suddenly turns against each other overnight? Just how?


You really want to know how? You really really want to know how?

2 Likes

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Funkybabee(f): 12:33pm On Mar 08, 2021
it's well
may he find peace of mind

1 Like

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Michelle55: 12:35pm On Mar 08, 2021
MansoryMX:



You really want to know how? You really really want to know how?
Yeah.. Please do enlighten me
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by drlaykay(m): 12:35pm On Mar 08, 2021
That's how a random woman called me from canada pleading for a medical report.
Said the content should be that when she was in Nigeria 2016, she was admitted in my hospital because her husband beat her while she was pregnant and that she lost consciousness for some days.
I asked what she needed it for, she said nothing that she only wanted to keep it. She offered me 200k, I rejected it without thinking twice.

Na so she go use am go destroy another person life. I will never be an accomplice to someone else's downfall. I can't sell my conscience for money.

44 Likes 2 Shares

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by akeeng: 12:35pm On Mar 08, 2021
Keshinr0:
Am against him coming back
You guys should give him support, help him get his life back.
Tell him to forget about his kids, for now, when they are old enough they will be with him him

Hmmmm. This is easy to type. You wouldn’t understand what not being able/allowed to see you child(ren) means until you are in that situation
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by grafixdon: 12:35pm On Mar 08, 2021
My brother had the same issue with his wife some years ago... Unfortunately for him he was deported back to Nigeria without a penny after many years in uk. Meanwhile, he was the one who took his wife to the uk.

After he was reported, she doesn't even allow him to speak with his kids (2girls) on phone. He later suffers depression, always on drugs, he couldn't work or do anything meaningful, totally useless... Today, the guy is in rehab in Yaba, he's shadow of himself as I speak...

32 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by SweetCunt97(f): 12:36pm On Mar 08, 2021
dannywest:
Filing mine in Nigeria.

Luckily no kids and no contest so not as messy.

Western law is strongly biased against men and men really go through so much in the hands of some women but are never believed.
Atleast una don tick register. But didnt you marry yr friend? What could have happened?
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Reex12(m): 12:36pm On Mar 08, 2021
marraige na scam
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 12:37pm On Mar 08, 2021
His mistake was not seeing the signs early enough. If you insist on keeping your wife and family with you in the UK, you need to take financial precautions; like keeping the bulk of your savings in offshore accounts that she is not aware of, including her name on the mortgage papers and getting your kids acclimatized to staying with your parents in Nigeria. So as soon as you see signs of her misbehaviour, you pack up and leave her hanging. The court cannot award her what they can't find. Well, too late now.

Tell him to suspend the search for a job until the court case is all wrapped up. There's very little she can gain from him now; the court cannot order a jobless man to either pay alimony or child support. After that, he can relocate to another town, pick up the pieces and try to get visitation rights. Over time, it will resolve itself.

32 Likes 7 Shares

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 12:38pm On Mar 08, 2021
Is his wife, a nigerian or a foreigner

1 Like 2 Shares

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Kayberg: 12:38pm On Mar 08, 2021
What if his wife is seeing someone else?
Women can be unpredictable at times.

5 Likes

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Afrobasic(m): 12:38pm On Mar 08, 2021
Take the redpill, take the redpill, you will not hear,

Now you are looking for sympathy *hisses*

14 Likes

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Quaddafi29: 12:39pm On Mar 08, 2021
Marriage has become a nightmare and divorce has become a horror.

2 Likes

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by ElijahIme1992(m): 12:39pm On Mar 08, 2021
Looooooool which kind mumu man go marry for UK......dats y I like my naija...here na 50-50...let him enjoy his wahala jare

1 Like

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Built2last: 12:40pm On Mar 08, 2021
ASUNDER:
My friend is currently going through a divorce in the UK and having a hell of a time. His wife mounted as many allegations on him as possible during separation - domestic violence, marital rape, child abuse, drugs and alcohol use, adultery, forgery just to name a few. He had to leave the house. He has moved to a room in a shared house and now even struggling to pay the rent. He does not see his kids anymore (not by choice). He is very broke and in debt because of all that is going on. He can no longer afford a lawyer. He feels so powerless, helpless and hopeless that he cannot fight most of what his wife is putting him through in court. He represents himself these days.

He has stopped looking after himself and is always looking sad . He also lost his job due to his arrest and all the drama. He was arrested because he tried to go see his kids at his former home and his wife called the police that she was afraid of him and that he had come to harass her. Police arrested him even without any traces of any harassment. Note that he moved out of the family house voluntarily thinking that the period of separation would ease tension between him and his wife.

I always feel sad seeing him in this state and just wish that he could recover and bounce back. He is considering moving back to Nigeria.

Have you gone through divorce in the UK or do you know anyone who has? What was the experience and what advice would you give someone going through this?

Thank you.

Get him to sign up to universal credit so he can pay his rent and feed first. He needs to pick up the pieces and move on.

I will never fight over children. When they grow up, they have a way of looking for a missing parent. that vacuum is always there in them

14 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Lekmanz87(m): 12:42pm On Mar 08, 2021
ASUNDER:
My friend is currently going through a divorce in the UK and having a hell of a time. His wife mounted as many allegations on him as possible during separation - domestic violence, marital rape, child abuse, drugs and alcohol use, adultery, forgery just to name a few. He had to leave the house. He has moved to a room in a shared house and now even struggling to pay the rent. He does not see his kids anymore (not by choice). He is very broke and in debt because of all that is going on. He can no longer afford a lawyer. He feels so powerless, helpless and hopeless that he cannot fight most of what his wife is putting him through in court. He represents himself these days.

He has stopped looking after himself and is always looking sad . He also lost his job due to his arrest and all the drama. He was arrested because he tried to go see his kids at his former home and his wife called the police that she was afraid of him and that he had come to harass her. Police arrested him even without any traces of any harassment. Note that he moved out of the family house voluntarily thinking that the period of separation would ease tension between him and his wife.

I always feel sad seeing him in this state and just wish that he could recover and bounce back. He is considering moving back to Nigeria.

Have you gone through divorce in the UK or do you know anyone who has? What was the experience and what advice would you give someone going through this?

Thank you.

Coming to nigeria is not a good idea for me when a man falls 7times he must get up 8times...man up and get your shits together coz when there’s life there’s still hope...#Shiloh

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by definateli: 12:42pm On Mar 08, 2021
He must not try to come back X 100.
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by seunmsg(m): 12:44pm On Mar 08, 2021
Michelle55:
How do people who vows to take the forever steps together suddenly turns against each other overnight? Just how?

Lori ori.
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by doxijaw: 12:45pm On Mar 08, 2021
Refer him to the redpill section on nairaland.

Advice him to..


Find a job , build back home, get a non Nigerian easy going female for companionship , avoid the ex like a plague.

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 12:45pm On Mar 08, 2021
Let him relocate back to Nigeria. When my brother was going through same, I gave him that advice.....
It saved his live. Today, 14 years after, he is grateful for that advice and the attendant support.

I wish your friend all the best.
Refer to this story to understand better..,
https://www.nigeriafilms.com/celebrity-gossips/79-city-flame/20009-fantasyland-boss-fola-ogunlesi-fights-wife-in-public

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Burgerlomo: 12:46pm On Mar 08, 2021
Oracleforce:
Tell him to relocate to a better country...and eke his living....when the time comes the children will look for their daddy. Because if he continues this way, he might die prematurely....and that will make his wife happy...

So, let him move away, and keep track of his children...life is too short....he shouldn't spend it on bemoaning runaway wife...

Well said bro or sis.

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by dermmy(m): 12:47pm On Mar 08, 2021
grafixdon:
My brother had the same issue with his wife some years ago... Unfortunately for him he was deported back to Nigeria without a penny after many years in uk. Meanwhile, he was the one who took his wife to the uk.

After he was reported, she doesn't even allow him to speak with his kids (2girls) on phone. He later suffers depression, always on drugs, he couldn't work or do anything meaningful, totally useless... Today, the guy is in rehab in Yaba, he's shadow of himself as I speak...


It is well. cry
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by od501: 12:47pm On Mar 08, 2021
HRprof:
This matter strong
That is to say British law protect woman, if its here in Nigeria is the other way round. My advise is that Nigeria men should learn how to protect their wife either in Nigeria or abroad to aviod this scenarios.
Anyway lets people who stay in UK give the guy better advice because for we in Nigeria will not give him better advise as Nigeria is lawless even in marriage issue as People do anyhow and get away with it.

This is to show you what happens when a women given the smallest of power.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by seunmsg(m): 12:47pm On Mar 08, 2021
Kayberg:
What if his wife is seeing someone else?
Women can be unpredictable at times.

It’s not a matter of what if, it’s very certain. She will soon get married to another man and they will both be enjoying the sweat of the first husband and be laughing at him. We’ve seen this play out over and over again.

15 Likes

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by richie240: 12:48pm On Mar 08, 2021
Tats:


There is really not much he can do about it. The law favours the woman especially if they have kids. My white neighbour and his wife who are a relatively young couple have two children and when they had marital disagreement, he was the one that had to move out of the house. Luckily for him, his parents do not live far away so he moved to their house. He has a job so can at least fend for himself. Many Nigerian men are in the same boat as this man and are really struggling and that's why there are so many single and divorced older men here. He may even be the one still paying for the mortgage in the house that he is not living in and the lady could bring another man to the house to stay.
Jesu!!!
Can u imagine!
This s part of d reason 'men are going their own ways' nowadays.

They are gradually realizing that d phrase 'settle down' wasn't a coincidental derivation; it literally means what it is!

The marriage is over 90% beneficial yo the woman. If not for legitimate sex and procreation, a man has absolutely no biz tying d knot.

Is d milk worth buying d cow?
I think not!
cool

20 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by NoSentiment: 12:48pm On Mar 08, 2021
That's the price u pay for marrying there. The bright sparks from Naija when they arrive uk go to any length to marry British women not knowing the implications. Women and children are the most protected group of ppl in the uk. It is as though the powers that be there have sworn to avenge the past centuries of abuse of women and children there. Many responsible men never touch women with a badge pole in the Uk

13 Likes 1 Share

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) ... (14) (Reply)

Man Who Just Got Sacked, Cut Into Two By BRT Bus / Oyinbo Man Spotted Hawking Soft Drinks To Nigerians In UK Traffic / Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 47
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.