₦airaland Forum

Mynd_44: I give up

Great mynd u have been very helpful.....f.o.pls

Skii: Mr, if you are sure its her, its either of two things

Tone your game down to her level Or You up her game to your level!!

Thanks skii, that's a very practical advice......i hv tried both and failed.....i think i will have to be more patient as well as more tactfull..... afew tips from u won't hurt......thanks a lot bro....

Scash: oh ho! Wat did u just vomit?
Cos she loves d guy she shd sacrifice wat?
He shld be d one to learn how to control his hormones if he really likes her. S.ex is not everything in a relationship dakun.

But op, is it s.ex dts causing d problem or is it dt u guys just don't understand each other. I don't understand why you av to keep feeling guilty though, shez d one dt wants a break... U were honest wt ha, dts gud. Ur conscience shd be cleared.
Now dt u want to make things work by fire by force, I think you need to talk with her. Talkin is d starting point. There, u shld find out what she really wants. If shez no longa into u, let ha go. U don't force love

Hope I was able to help. And hey, saying could anyone 'sensible' advice u is quite rude. No offense intended. U need advice u ask for it politely

Hey scash, u have been helpful....thanks a lot for the same.....
I said "sensible" coz in many of the posts....the spoilers are just makin fun without givin any gud advice

third.....we understand each other well and miss each other a lot......there is no other gal in my life and i m confident there is no other guy in hers......she also doesn't wanna let me go....the major problems are......she lives with her parents and her parents are not too supportive of our relationship......livin at home she has some restrictions on her moving about.......
second ......she is very busy with her work......u kno ....resident in obg......so she is not able to find time for me....
third....i still don't know why she has never recognised the relationship in public.....whether it is just lack of boldness....or is it that she is not sure of spending her life with mein fact her lack of acceptance of the relationship in public and lack of absolute commitment for marriage is what makes me tense......lack of s.ex sometimes adds to her non-committment.....all of this sounds that she is just not into me......but whenever we talk she is as sweet to me as ever.....i get blown away with that sweetness and cant let her go even if i try.....
P.S> Thanks everyone....for being so understanding....

chidyhels: so y cant he sacrfice being intimate to kip the gal and get it after marriage
Y must she be the one sacrificing?

I can sacrifice and wait....in fact i have waited for the past 5 years.....only thing i want is commitment from her.....and that she accepts and recognises the relationship publically (although her parents might not approve of it).....and another thing is how cud i know that she wud be actively s.exual after marriage......is there any way
P.S> Thanks chidyhels....u r right in pointing this thing out to me....

Konnektions146: whaat if after marriage , dey find out dey re incompatible(a gap in se.x drive), one of dem will start hoppin around abi

de thing is , young man, managin a relationship like dis is like a time bomb, if eventually u get married , wat happens?

wish u luck

True.... that is one of my worries too......is there a way to know how compatible we would be after marriage.....actually ours being a conservative society premarital s.ex is taboo.....but i just hope she wud b good s.exually after marriage...

Floxyluv: So, on point!!! I think, if someone truly loves you, he/she should be willing to make sacrifice for their partner. It's clear you actually love this babe in question, but do you think she feels the same way? It all boils down to that you know? All i can tell you is to be wise!!!

She misses me too and calls me and wants to talk to me.....but i avoid her coz i know this cycle will start again....talking....then i'll ask for her commitment for marriage which she will not.....also she doesn't and has never accepted the relationship publicly.......again in some time i would be angry with her and then i'll tell her things that wud hurt her.....and then another mini breakup.......what i want is even if she doesn't have s.ex with me she should at least promise for marriage and accept the relationship publically.....am i asking too much?
P.S. Floxyluv u have really understood my problem thanx a ton for the same.....

Shollypopz: i don't know what baffles me more, the op or jay bee that actually understood what he wrote. *sigh*

jay bee's trying to help.....could u please shut up!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Could nebody have another idea how do i make it work

Thanks bro.....that was of some help.....
only thing is i just can't let her go......emotionally......and deep inside i find it immoral on my part to let her go and move on.....
thanks a ton newaz

I am a medico doin my fellowship.....My relationship started 5 years back.....the gal is now doin her residency in obstetrics gynecology......our relationship has gone through innumerable breakups and patchups......i m a guy who loves sex.....but she has not allowed to have any......though we have got physical to various extents......she says she is a virgin......i believe she is due to some kinda proof i had.......i have told her of my sexuals encounters which she disgusts.......and then one day around 4 years back i was about have sex with another gal......i felt guilty and told my galfren about this after 3 months......she left me......then after months of talking to her and helping her in her exams.....she told me again that she loved me.....but things didn't really normalise after that......after innumerbale fights....both of us don't wanna talk to each other much....she wants to treat me as a good fren and calls me .....but i feel so bad after talking to her and not really getting her...that i fight with her anf hurt her.....this has been goin on for months if not years now......but i don't wanna leave her.....i can't get into any other relationship....i feel guilty and i miss her.......could anyone sensible out there tell me what do i do?i am shattered....and so is she.....