₦airaland Forum

Na him own wahala bi dat. wey tin concern us if him lose hope in buhari administration. if him lose hope abeg make una give am hope oooooooo

Flood waters can’t drown love, torrents of rain can’t put it out. Love can’t be bought, love can’t be sold– it’s not to be found in the marketplace.
(Son 8:7 MSG)

Mr. and Mrs. Zerubbabel are beautifully married. They both loved each other when they got married, but over the years, it looked like they were drifting apart. Mr. Zeru never could sense any love from his wife. Mrs. Zeru too could no longer feel any love. The more they tried to show their love to each other, the more frustrated they became.

You see, loving your spouse in marriage is not about
just showing love, it is first of all about finding out what your spouse understands as love!

When you finally discover this, it is your spouses’ password, and that is what informs your continual access to him or her. It your spouses’ love language and he or she understand nothing aside for that that. So what are the love languages? How do singles strike a balance on love languages?

According to Dr. Gary Chapman, there are five love languages. These are expressions of love to your spouse in way he/she will understand. We will take a look one after the other.

1. Words of Affirmation
This include deliberate use of words in such a way that they will build up your spouse. Good comments about the food, dressing and so on. For some couples, this will be their love language and until you do it, they will not understand your love for them. If this is your spouses’ love language, you have to learn to be more expressive.

For singles, care has to be taken not to go to the extent of using sexual words to deliberately set the mood for sex. Sex is reserved for married people and no matter how old fashioned that sounds, that still is the truth. During courtship, use of non-sexual words can be employed. Simple compliments and appreciation will do the magic.

2. Quality Time
Some individuals believe that being together, doing things together and focusing on one another are the only ways they will understand love. If this is your partner’s love language, then you will need to offer undivided attention and shut off things like television, games and other things that keep you apart. Such people whose love language is quality time, especially wives, should really not be neglected. This is because if they are left to spend more time with colleagues or any other person, emotional love may develop which could be taken to a physical level if care is not taken. If you are the husband, and this is your wife’s love language, make sure you create time out of no time to meet this important need.

For singles, quality time does not include night times. It does not include late night outs or else quality times might turn out to be regretful times. Don’t go and sleep over in his or her house before marriage in your bid to satisfy. You cannot break God’s principles in order to speak a love language.

3. Gifts
Some spouses will only understand your love for them when you give them gifts. If this is your spouse’s love language, you had better pray that God blesses you! However, gifts do not need to be expensive, but they must be consistent. If this is your spouses’ love language, don’t argue it, just go ahead and perform! Sometimes, a gift as little as a chocolate bar will do the magic.

Singles should not take advantage of their eventual partners on this and demand all the time. There is a thin line between trying to live up to your love language and being unnecessarily covetous. Demanding all the time from your fiancé may not be about love language but just greed. Check your motive. Real love wants to give and not demand all the time.

4. Acts of Service
Discovering how you can best do something for your spouse will require time and creativity. These acts of service like helping with the dishes, preparing the children for school and helping out with household chores had to be done in love in order to be seen as love language.

Please, single ladies, know that offering your bodies for sex is not part of acts of service we are looking at here. That will be better referred to as acts of foolishness!

5. Physical Touch
This is exclusive reserve of married people. Touch, stroking and the lot will be appreciated by a spouse whose love language is physical touch. Somebody once said a woman not touched consistently could have her lifespan reduced!

If you are single and you discover that this is your love language, wait till you are married before demanding for physical touches and then your life will be pleasing to God. Unguarded physical touches can culminate into heartaches and untold agony. You cannot carry fire in your bosom and not be burned. Be wise.

© Oluwaseun Philip Ojo
www.greattreasuresblog.

Life is full of trials. We all go through our fair share of trials. And yet you’ve been such a brave young woman. You’ve passed through what most can’t imagine or contemplate. You’ve experienced things that defy definition, or even explanation. It’s almost as if you’ve lived three lifetimes judging by the quantum of your experiences. And each challenge life has thrown at you, you’ve somehow punched down, even in utter weakness. Who knew you were so strong! One by one you beat the odds. One by one they faded away. Though it must be said that it sometimes felt like the problems went away to recruit more virulent associates. Explains why a subsequent challenge feels tougher than the preceding. But here you are still standing, still believing, still hopeful, full of faith. You’re so, so courageous! That has got to take inner strength, the type you never knew you had, that nobody knew you had. Trials bring us out of us – the real us, the courageous us, the determined us, the strong us, the hidden us. Sometimes life throws things at us, not one item at a time but the entire kitchen sink with its full content. It is at those moments we feel sorry for ourselves, wondering what we’ve done to deserve such punishment and trial. “Why me?” we ask, and life in utter sarcasm returns, “Why not you?”

There are different challenges in life. For some people, it’s a sickness – a disorder, cancer or some other malevolent foe. For others, it’s marital discord. For some others it’s economic, or a family situation. Yet for some, it’s a death. The historic Job went through horrendous trials, and in quick succession – like the rapidity of machine gun fire. He it was who said through it all, “After he (God) has tried me, I shall come forth as gold.” Those are heroic words.

There just comes that time for some when everything seems to be happening at once. Everywhere there seems to be trouble, so much so we begin to anticipate troubles. And some have panic attacks. Life by itself, and without consulting us chooses some of us as endurance test candidates. And endure we must. The trials of life can be so great that we can be tempted to give up. Many give up. But you haven’t and you shouldn’t. After He has tried you, you shall come forth as gold.

We don’t know why some of us experience unimaginable trials. Life being the invigilator refuses to give us answers. It’s why we feel so alone, why life feels so vast and we seem to have no coordinates. We’re alone in this huge field of human experience. And the world doesn’t know what we’re going through. Even if the world knows, what does it matter, or why would it matter. We pass through crucibles alone. Trial is a customized private experience. And so we never really know why WE go through trials – why us in particular and not the other person. All we can ever know is God’s comfort and explanation. All we can ever know is His assurance, his love.

As I think of you, an imagery comes to mind. I see Paul on that ship, shackled, on his way to trial. And then a trial arose on his way to trial. The storms began. We never really see the story that way, but trial can mount upon trial, seeking to engulf us. But Paul said, God sent assurances right in the midst of the storm. May this letter be an assurance to you. Though trials may mount upon trials; and though trials may proceed from trials, yet God will not abandon you. In this world we will have tribulation is the promise of the Holy Script. But we will overcome is the second assurance. When we pass through the flames, God promised we will not be set ablaze. When we pass through floods, He said we will not drown. You will not drown in this sea of trouble. You will not perish. You will not be consumed.

Do not fear. God has not written you off and He won’t write you off. It is not in the character of God to