₦airaland Forum

We4all:
Let me be honest with you: some women were trained to believe that as a woman, they are mere spectators while the man is supposed to shoulder all responsibilities and take all the major decisions in a relationship. Would you blame her? Society has crowned men as the head, and she is just acting accordingly.

Perhaps she took after her mom. Funnily, there are men who don't mind women like that and would happily assert their authority. Since it's a big deal to you, and she isn't willing to change, then you might as well just call it quits or manage her like that.

Hmm
You’re actually right. I’ve genuinely tried to understand her and accept that that’s just how she is, but I’ve come to realize that I really can’t.
Thanks for your input, sir.

Carndidlaydid:
He said he needs brotherly or fatherly advice

Strikes me as a person who is just looking for his fellow kinds to validate his already made up mind to call off everything


Although you didn't ask for sisterly or motherly advice

But iwill give my advice anyways
Kindly call it off

Sisterly or motherly advice is absolutely welcome as well. My bad for not including that earlier, and thank you for your input.

Kobojunkie:
Go ahead and call it off since you are already considering doing it again. You already said you had to break up because of the issue and now you are considering doing it again meaning this issue is a real red flag for you. 🥱🥱

It doesn't mean the girl is a bad person but that you both are probably not good for each other at this point and that is OK.

Hmm! Well, I guess you're right. Thank you.

RevenuesBoost:
Have you tried thinking aback and you're sure that she hasn't offered at least one support or suggestion and how did you react to it?


I also know women that stop offering suggestions to their guys because the guy always wave it off and will prefer taking advice from a stranger rather than his woman.


I need you to sit her down and talk to her again and let her know her mistake, I'm sure she will try to fix it again.

Every human has their flaws, you can choose to overlook it and live with it forever or walk away.

I appreciate your contribution, ma.

To answer your question, I know this may sound exaggerated, but I have thought deeply about it and I honestly cannot recall a single time she has offered any meaningful suggestions or opinions. It seems this is simply who she is, and she may not be willing to change. I have genuinely tried to overlook this out of love, but I’ve come to realize that these things are very important to me.

In fact, I am the kind of man who wants to do everything with his woman, to be friends, confidants, and partners in every sense. There is no situation in which I would dismiss her input; her opinions would always matter to me.

Hello everyone. I hope you’re all having a good day.

I’m in a bit of a dilemma right now and I genuinely need advice from people with experience. I’ll try to keep this as brief as possible.

I’ve been with this lady for almost a year. It has mostly been good, with some bad moments as well, you know how relationships can be. One issue I’ve noticed for a while now (and yes, you can blame me for tolerating it) is that she lacks a supportive spirit. By support, I don’t mean financial support, though that wouldn’t be a bad thing either, but that’s not what I’m expecting at all.

Let me give an example. She expects me to handle almost everything: making enquiries, figuring things out, taking initiative on all matters. In most situations, she hardly contributes ideas or offers suggestions. On top of that, she struggles with accountability. Whenever there’s an issue, she prefers to dismiss it rather than address it properly.

These issues have caused a lot of arguments in the past. At one point, we even broke up for a while. When we got back together, she promised to work on herself and make changes, and for some time, it seemed like she was trying. But now it’s starting to feel like this is just who she is, and that real change may not be possible.

Things have progressed quite far between us. I've met with her parents and vice versa, and her family has started asking that my family should come over. We had already agreed that this would happen early next year. However, in the past few days, she has started displaying those same behaviours again, and it has given me serious cold feet.

I’m honestly considering calling everything off. I know it would disappoint a lot of people, but at this point, I don’t even seem to care. I’m worried about committing to something I may regret later.

I really need sincere, brotherly or fatherly advice right now. If I were your brother or your son, what would you advise me to do?

P.S. Please, if you don’t have anything meaningful to contribute and only intend to insult or mock, kindly don’t comment. That’s the last thing I need at this moment.

yemmit90:
If they are not rich and the only money you have for them is 25k, please give the cash to them.

Thanks for your input, sir. They’re an average family, but personally I’m not a fan of giving money as a gift unless it’s tied to something, like contributing to an event. I’d rather go with a tangible gift, and I don’t mind stretching my budget a bit if the 25k feels too small.

threegees:
I suggest you go with a fruit basket.

You may also go with a bottle of wine included.

I hope 25k can run this sha

Thank you for your input. I can extend the budget a bit.

Good day everyone! Please I need your advice. I’m planning to visit my girlfriend’s parents, and of course it wouldn’t make sense to just show up empty-handed. So I need ideas for gift to take along, something that will be thoughtful, respectful, and well-received. And within the budget of 25k.
What kind of gifts would you recommend that would make a good impression?
Thanks in advance for your suggestions.

N.B:
1) It's just a personal visit to her parents, just so they can know who their daughter is with. It’s not a formal introduction.

2) We're Yoruba families.

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StPete:
Ok I take my words back. But let’s be honest, if it were that easy to enter the street and become your own boss, 90% of Nigerians won’t be poor nor broke. The street nor easy

Na someone like you wey get patience fit reply that woman sha. Talking about becoming one's boss like it's just easy like that! Boss of what exactly? Of picking plastics to re-sell OR of catching lizards? Mtcheww

hanson27:
I even went as far as submitting applications to water factories and local bakeries, but never got any call.

Don't mind those guys jare, always acting like they're not in the same Nigeria as all of us. I hope help comes your way soon enough.

ahnie:
Are there no jobs in akwaibom state?

If there is, he wouldn't be on here asking for help to get one.

Nice2023:
My humble advice is this,tell ur parents to sell the family land and use it to start something for u. If they don't,someone some day will sell it to solve one problem.

I can not have a land and my children would be suffering and struggling,never.

Sell that family land and let everyone append their signatures to help the family grow and come out of poverty.

I trust my igbo brothers and sisters on this.

They will sell it and first of all come out of financial misery and later repurchase a befitting land for their parents later. That is one quality u can't take away from them.

Oga which stupid land are you advising him to sell? The one wey you buy for him family?

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Let's talk if you're serious! If you think you can scam me, you're only deceiving yourself. Serious buyer only please!

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