₦airaland Forum

Suffering 101

The match go make sense.

Still being jealous...

It has started o!

Hmm

sammyscholar:
and the modes are yet to do the needful

Mods.

Kai Buhari!

adren:
i stormed on one guy's post asking to be saved from his guilt.. people never took him seriously.. someone went as far as suggesting he cut off his hand (just like wright's mom did on instagram).. NL can make you want to co.mit suicide without killing yourself.... lolssss


to everyone, this might be funny and hilarious but it is a thorn in a masturbator's flesh..

i want to share this solutions because i used to be one prominent member of the "masturbators association of nigeria- MAN" myself ( i was about to be voted as the vice president before i resigned)..

trust me, experience is the best teacher.. some would ask you to pray about it, some would even ask you to give your life to jesus .. bitter truth is, i once saw a painting of the mother of jesus- Mary, i found it sexy and i got a hard-on from it.. i had to masturbate at the next chance i got..

so.. this is about personal issues.. it is a disgrace because you don't wanna be caught by someone else (your prick go calm down instantly)..

enough of the stories.. these are what i did to stop it.. it wasn't easy but i am a living proof..




1. avoid been alone when you feel Hot: boys naturally have high libidos.. except one is impotent.. unless, it is bedtime, you dont wanna be caught left alone.. there is this spirit that pushes you to do it and you would have cvmmed long before u get back to your senses..

the best solution to this is looking for a public place with lots of crowd to interact with..

even the devil cannot give you enough liver needed to masturbate in public places.. go to a football viewing centre, a gaming centre, a bar etc..

2. desist from porn: the last time i masturbated, (30-12-2015).. i was feeling lonely, idle and 'single'.. imagine a 23 year old without a gf!!
so.. i switched to my favourite porn site to watch the only thing that can satisfy my urge and get me so high to think masturbation is the only thing that could get me out of my fantasy..
i masturbated as usual but it was not business as usual..
then i thought to myself 'o boy, is this how you would keep living till the end of your days?? is this how you will continue into 2016?? at 23, you don't want to get a life??

mind if i tell you my readers, that my masturbation act got so bad that i could masturbate in an uncompleted building.. i'd just bend down like i want to defecate but emmmm...

so.. it was the last day i watched porn..

3. drink lots of water and pee everytime: for guys, peeing has a way of suppressing erections..
i need not talk much about this but it is the best and the most proven strategy to help stop it only if you want to..
when you feel that the devil is about to make a workshop out of your hand.. stand up almost immediately and go pee.. force out the pee if it won't come.. it is a sure bet that your joyatick is going to take a chill pill (500mg)..

4. get a girlfriend or pay for a one-night stand/quickie (olosho): this is a long-term solution.. i know myself.. even if i tried to stop masturbating, and i do not find a long term solution to my problem by looking for a "LASWMA" to leave my 'trash' for, my case might end up been like that girl in the bible whose demon was cast out and the demon went to invite seven others..

masturbation has a way of torturing sex freaks.. fortunately for me, i went to a party the first week of 2016 and that was where i met this fine girl.. she is from ondo and they are only second to calabar girls on "baddest nigerian babes list." if such thing exists..




on a final note.. i have only written this to inspire those who are battling with masturbation issues..

i dont know if ladies can utilise my 'tested and trusted' methods but i can use ayilala to swear that this will work for you 100%..

if you are bold enough.. without feeling stigmatised, share how u conquered it.
you would be helping a thousand others who are dying in silence.. and if you want to start stigmatising, think again because your relative is doing that shiiii right now..

and to etc.. this is plagiarism free and not "oyinbo man" recommended.. their ways are different from ours..

hope this helps!!

Bro, you funny die! I don Laff so tey, my ribs dey pain me.

They were ashamed.

Aufbauh:
Everybody dey against una. Haba!
Can't you people reflect on why everyone is against una. Is there anything we are doing wrongly? And don't bring on your anthem of 'Envy' by all, because even the powerful industrious nation the USA does not get this backlash.

What else? Envy bro! You hate people when they are more successful in almost everything.
I said almost because aside from politics, we are doing pretty well.

netizenbuzz:
You are a fool o. It is your sisters' marriages that will fail ode.

Mumu! Nairaland celebrity. May amadioha strike you down! Bloody foool.

missingrib:
oya now... tomorrow be ready to bring back home a drunk gf...beer parlour indeed...its better u guys stay indoor than going to beer parlour.

Hehehehe! Na you Sabi. Nobody force am drink.

missingrib:
na beer parlour u wan carry her go before....

Who said it's only restaurants and hotels are good for dates? Beer parlour can still work, in the right environment.

Nos 2 jare! The babe just dey show side nyansh.

netizenbuzz:
It is your own marriage that will be a disaster waiting to happen. Like male celebrities don't have marital issues. And every thing is not about money. You men and your ego are also problems so please take a seat!

Stvpid cuntt! I guess you one of the female celebrities abi? Who am I exchanging words with? Tonto dike, abi na Mercy Johnson?
God go punish an slowpoke like you for quoting me, ode!

Hahahaha

Aki take style ugly small.

Tyrant.

Poor people and excessive breeding. Plenty of time to waste.

APC should simply back out from the rerun to avoid another complete disgrace. If Ngige couldn't get to the second position in the last one, I wonder who can.

Female celebrity marriages in Nigeria are nothing, but disaster waiting to happen.
When you believe your ideal man is someone with a six or seven figure income, then it's bound to fail even before it started.

So, it has come to this. They turned Oga Dbanj to ordinary phone messenger. Why na?

rubi96:
the shoebox folder is under the phone memory but when I connect my phone to move the movies, I don't see the folder again.

Sounds like you're using infinix phone. They always choose phone memory as their default storage. Move the movies to your SD card. If your phone is not hacked, then I'm afraid it's a bit difficult to do.
Once you move to SD card, you can transfer to pc using a card Reader or through the phone. If you don't understand what I just wrote, I won't blame you. I don't understand any of it myself.

rottennaija:
It's not about the ideas, it's about the will to implement it. That's what makes the difference

Story! I guess the BVN registration started after may 2015.

rubi96:
@all How can i copy or move showbox downloaded movies from my phone to laptop. I can't seem to find the app when i connect my phone to laptop. Please help. Thank you.

The downloaded movies are in showbox folder in SD card memory.

Why stoop so low?

Jonathan's ideas...

Endless appointments and little or nothing to show for it. We're in for the long haul.

Hohohoho and a bottle of rum. Lying liars, how market?

The propaganda party a.k.a the lying liars has lost once again.
Seems the SE and SS are allergic to them.

Kai! See Jalopy!