₦airaland Forum

Klass99:
too many women place their kids over and above their hubbys.

This is very common in London where the kids are used as pawns / weapons against their Dad who eventually has no choice but to move out of the house for his own sanity or to prevent himself from going to prison for disciplining his own child in a situation where wife and kids gang up against husband/father to get him out of the house any which way they can so that the woman can claim generous single parent cash from the government and the kids can do as they wish in the house with no correction.

A lot of times, the generous single parent cash benefits that is given to single mothers in the UK (which is the single parent capital of Europe) has blinded some of these so called single mothers to the long term dangers of raising children in a home where there is no father figure.

One such Nigerian boy aged 23 stabbed his mum do death in London in 2013 and is currently serving life in prison.

A similar case happened in Detroit USA in 2012 when a 14 year old boy shoots his mother dead as she slept after she tried to keep him away from joining a gang or hang with the 'big boys'.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-essex-33204248

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2107504/Joshua-Smith-14-shoots-mother-Tamiko-Robinson-death-slept.html

NoToPile:
parenting seems to be a whole different ball game in obodo yonder.

In Nigeria, a parent can go to their child's school, enter their classroom and slap / flog their child in front of his classmates and teacher as punishment for something the child did at home.

Try that in the West and the Government will take that child off you (and their social services will most likely wreck the child's life eventually), and you will most likely lose your job and most likely end up in prison for assault and/or child abuse.

KanwuliaBaby:
You damn right! I don’t play with these little fools here o.

If you try to call the police, they will just fall on their knees and be begging. Dem don taya to see police ke!

You have to use the system to your advantage ke!

Every police complaint is RECORDED IN THEIR FILES.

When it gets to a stage, they police sends them in front is a judge for being public nuisances. That na another wahala entirely.

Na dem go get record, nor be me?✅

You are lucky their Dad is on the same page with you.

My Ex wife once told me in front of my then 11 year old son in London (who I was about to discipline) the following words - Ti o ba fi owo kan omo yen ma a pe olopa - meaning that if I touched my son, she would call the police.

1Sharon:
As for me personally no 11 year old will have a phone.

Now that is wisdom.

Prevention they say is better than cure.

When you give a child access to a web enabled phone with little or no supervision you have already lost that child to the jungle called the internet and social media with 7 billion influencers influencing your child daily positively and majorly negatively.

I also marvel when i visit friends and see that their kids who are not even 8 years old have unfettered and unsupervised access to everything on the DARK WORLD WIDE WEB.

In London, I did not have my first phone or home computer until age 32 and the heavens did not fall. Kids use enough computer and supervised internet access at school so they can do without it at home or if they must use it at home, i will so rig the computer or phone with monitoring such that I am aware of any dodgy website they visit before they say jack robinson.

Me wey be say I dey track my then 14 year old sons posts on his Facebook account and I sharply correct him when he and his friends make unacceptable posts online and when he tries to deny it, I ask him if he wants me to tell him the date, time and exact content he posted and he then backs out from his denials.

I'm sure a lot of parents don't know that the rational part of a teenager's brain is not fully developed and won’t be fully developed until age 25 or so.
https://www.urmc.rochester.edu/encyclopedia/content.aspx?ContentTypeID=1&ContentID=3051

Although left to me, he would not be on Facebook even at 14 years old and I was in away in Nigeria on a business trip and my ex wife allowed him a Facebook account in my absence.

Even a lot of adults can not handle some of the "stuff" they see / read on the internet / social media talk less of a teenage or pre-teenage child and this is why i marvel when i see black parents in the UK allow their very young children (less than 10 years old) to have the same access that adults have to all the content on the dirty world wide web when even adults are struggling to cope with / exorcise themselves of some of the sordid nastiness on the internet / social media.

Imagine allowing a child unsupervised access to twitter where people post any and everything in "broad daylight" including pornography and twitter turns a blind eye !!!!

KanwuliaBaby:
I told the police to please take anyone who can't tolerate the home rules. Do you know what the stupidd cops told me?

They said their “books” are full and there is no space in “the system”! Oh?

If ANY CHILD DISOBEYS, I CALL THE POLICE!

I wore them out.

No one wants to call police any more o!
I became an EXPERT in calling the police.

If you nor wash plate- POLICE!
If your nor brush teeth- POLICE!
If you disobey curfew- POLICE!
If you nor do homework- POLICE!
If you use foul language at home- POLICE!

The police were tired of me o! I taught them and the children a gravvvve lesson.

Now, I can parent in. PEACE!

Funny but true and I'm sure your kids must have been dumbfounded at the above scenarios but they don't understand where you are coming from.

Raising kids in the West where black kids especially black boys are picked on by the institutionally racist system is not for the faint hearted.

I remember years ago in London when the nursery said my son was not talking fluently at age 2 and so they recommended speech therapy which I bluntly refused telling them that he would talk in his own time which he did.

Ffwd 2 years later when he was 4 and his teacher was in my opinion picking on him too much and I told her that if she does not leave him alone, I would report her to my father and she then asked who my father was and I pointed to the sky and said God is my father.

The UK is a place where the educational system picks on black boys disproportionately and my seeing how the system has encouraged single motherhood which may be a big reason black Carribean boys/men represent a disproportionately large population of british prison inmates had already preconditioned me before having kids that if i had a boy child in the UK, it would be fire for fire between me and the system if they tried any nonsense with my son.

Around age 4 the UK educational system dignosed my son as having ADHD and they recommended that I should take him to a special school. At first I obliged and took him to the so called "school" but alas on my first visit with my 4 year old son to the so called special school, i noticed that it was not actually a school building but a one storey house that could pass for a residential house and the only 2 pupils at the "school" was by 4 year old son and another black boy and the sole teacher was white, male and of Bobrisky's inclination (if you get my drift).

I already knew I was not leaving my son alone in this mans presence for even 1 second so I waited for the man to step out of line by shouting at my son for running around and i just stood up and dragged the boy out of the so called "school" telling the so called "teacher" that my son is no longer coming to his school and i took him back to the perplexed main stream school.

Their next step was to call me to round table meetings with various so called specialists with PHD's in different educational fields but when they see that my first question to them was to ask them if they were really doctor's with MBBS degrees or just had PHD's, they shockingly look at themselves with the knowing look that this one will not swallow anything we tell him and when the recommended that they put my son on some tablets to cure the so called ADHD, I bluntly refused.

What I did was to use "tough love" therapy at home and as my google research said not to give him apples or any food containing salicylates, i withdrew apples from his diet but I think it was the 2toughlove" that did the trick as i myself know that he was a handful as a child but i was not going to let them send him to a school house where he was one of the only 2 kids there and the teacher was an effeminate male and neither was i going to let them damage his brain with drugs.

When he was going from primary to secondary school, the primary school sent a file to the secondary school labelling him as special needs but i was not perturbed 'cos i knew that I was not going to take my eye off the ball as pertaining the close marking and tough love I showed him at home to straighten him out.

Also he was not allowed to roam around the neighbour hood after school or at weekends and i encured i created a tailored timetable for him on Saturdays that included study time / breaks and play time and in the bathroom i regularly pin positive affirmative quotes to the mirror so that my kids regularly see it as they are washing their hands.

Tough love at home did the trick with him and he is now a respected contributor to British society.

Coming back to your story, I know a couple in London where the 23 year old son was rude to the mom who reported him to his dad when the dad came home. Dad tries verbally correcting the son, leads to an argument that degenerated into a physical combat between the man and his 23 year old son .

As the physical combat between son and father progressed, the son was having the upper hand over his Dad (who was about 50 at the time) as the son was using some deadly choke holds he learnt in the gym on his dad and at some point he tied up his dad in some martial arts knot such that the dad could not move and had to cry out for help to his wife by frantically calling her name and saying he was tired and running out of breath at which point the mum had to bite her son in order to have him release the stranglehold on his Dad.

The woman told her son to leave the house and he refused and she then called the police whose first move was to try to arrest the woman's husband on arriving thinking it was a case of domestic violence until the woman told the cops it was not her husband but her son that she wanted thrown out of the house.

Another London parenting story was where a 10 year old Nigerian boy called the cops saying his mum beat him and when the cops knocked at the door the woman dragged her son to the door, opened the door and pushed the boy out of the flat in the cops direction telling the cops they could have him and telling her son that she wishes him well with his new parents and then she slammed the door shut and locked it.

It took a long time of the police pleading with her at her doorstep before she allowed the boy back into the house.

What some parents go through in the West in the hands of their children is better left imagined.

I even heard of another middle aged man who had a heart attack and died while raising his voice to discipline / shout at a misbehaving child or is it that nurse Mrs Kalejaiye who was stabbed to death by her 23 year old son in the same London (the son is now serving life in prison) .
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-essex-33204248

Research by CCTV.co.uk concludes that in London there is now 1 CCTV Camera for every 13 people , meaning there are now 691,000 CCTV Cameras in London and the average Londoner is caught on CCTV 300 times a day .

If London continues to see surveillance levels increasing in line with population levels, we can expect the number of CCTV cameras in London to pass 1,000,000 in the next 5 years.
https://www.cctv.co.uk/how-many-cctv-cameras-are-there-in-london/

Hope our fantastically corrupt Politicians in Nigeria and the Equally Fantastically corrupt Police Heads are listening to this and maybe they will borrow a leaf from London in channeling resources to technological methods that can deter and help fight crime and make Nigerians safe.

Tribute to Long suffering Nigerians for what they Put up with from their Leaders

I was at home tonight and I turned on the Taps in the kitchen and the water pressure was low and eventually stopped flowing (both hot and cold taps).

I checked the taps in the bathroom and hot was dry and cold still had some water running.

Immediately I went onto Thames Water website and lo and behold this now private water company that supplies most of London with water had already updated their website stating the post codes where there was outage and this included my post code and they stated that their specialist engineers were already on the case.

I was a bit amazed that they were that fast to identify the outage and honest enouh to update their website with the exact postal code areas affected by the burst water mains.

The fact that i pay approx £38 a month in water bill to them did not even cross my mind as to be the reason why they were that quick to respond and then with honesty on their website.

What crossed my mind was the 2 years I spent in Naija from 2006-2008 trying my hands at relocation and the fact that the utility companies do not take Nigerians serious and they get away with blue murder in terms of their abysmal service.

When you now extrapolate that to the extreme corruption of ALL our politicians who have stolen Nigerians blind and still want to continue stealing from the common treasury until majority of Nigerians become prostrate with hunger, poverty, frustration and desperation that has led a lot of Nigerians to commit suicide then I have to say Kudo's to long suffering Nigerians for what thay have to put up with from companies, service providers, utility companies, police, army, lastma, VIO, FRSC, Customs, Billionaire Area boys and worst of all the devilishly corrupt Nigerian politicians who superintend over the whole messy situation.

In the 33 years that I have lived in London, today (23 March 2022) is just the 3rd time that I have suffered water outage in my abodes - 1st time was around 1993 for a few hours and i was compensated with a £50 by Thames water to cover any food damage in the freezer, 2nd time was around 2019 and it was restored withing 2 hours, 3rd time is today an Thames water had already posted it and the steps they were taking to fix the burst pipes on their website and if it lasts up to 24 hours which i seriously doubt they will have to pay a £20 compensation to each household affected and this will run into millions with interest charged if the payment is late.

I discovered today's outage around 8.30 pm tonight and by the time I logged onto Thames water website to make a complaint, they were already on the case with the areas affected listed transparently on their website. Its 9.27pm and they are still working on it in the full knowledge that the street lights work 24/7, their engineers are safe as the 24/7 electricity means there is always someone out and about at any time of the day and night plus the fear of the 691,000 CCTV Cameras dotted around London is enough to deter all but the most hardened and/or drug addicted criminal who will not attack the Thames water engineers anyway.

Research by CCTV.co.uk concludes that in London there is now 1 CCTV Camera for every 13 people , meaning there are now 691,000 CCTV Cameras in London and the average Londoner is caught on CCTV 300 times a day .
https://www.cctv.co.uk/how-many-cctv-cameras-are-there-in-london/

How long can Nigerians bear the unnecessary hardship inflicted upon them by these hearless criminals parading as politicians.

With all our religiosity in Nigeria, how come it is the corrupt politicians and their cronies and area boy enforcers that are progressing financially whilst the masses (very religious) are wallowing in ABJECT poverty and why has God not come to the aid on Nigerians ?? Is all their faith in vain ??

The UK is a country which has a largely atheist population yet most of Britons display consideration for others and a willingness to do something for the greater good of their fellow citizen and country because they feel it it the right thing to do and most of Brits do not believe in God.

I shouldn't even start with Nepa as that is a different kettle of fish. In the UK you pay through your nose for electricity but in my 33 years of living in London I think I have only experience power outage about 2 times - 2012 and around 2018 and it lasted around 15 minutes and 30 minutes respectively and was caused by road construction workers hitting a cable with their drills.

Once again I say Tribute to Long suffering Nigerians for what they Put up with from their Leaders

Rant over.

I just hope some Nigerians will not sell their votes for 500 Naira again in 2023.