₦airaland Forum

oldienavie:
@OP, I'd really like to know what the terms were in your courtship.
This is what I tell single guys, when you are dating a lady and she is forming feminist and pushing house chores on you without remorse be careful and define the lines before it gets out of hand.

I can cook very well, but I still let my babes know that the kitchen is their office, I have met a few who disagreed and that was when I knew I could not marry them.

What you will not take in marriage dont even start it in a courtship... I am sorry to say this but you will have to live like this or be prepared to go through a difficult process to set the lines straight again in your marriage.

I wish you goodluck.

Thanks a lot

sisisioge:
Hian! Wahala don wear cardigan for you!

Oga,she wont change o....house chores is not in her nature. Better accept your fate and get a maid. If you dont stop swelling on this....you guys will be decoupled in a couple of years. Pele....you suppose go visit her to know how disposition towards keeping house before you married her fa

She has talked about maid. I even tried getting one but not yet successful. I’m
Also afraid that having maid she will leave even cooking to maid and everything in the house.

BrickDevo:
Brother you are not wrong, It feels like you begged her to marry you, for God's sake stop pampering her, if she's is misbehaving you call her to other, scold her and let the quarrelling last long, you have taken the position of a wife in your marriage instead of being the man who is supposed to be in control, you are here crying because she threatened divorce, how can you work then you still come back to do dishes, not rarely but occasionally, guy you dey fućk up,

I feel she must have done a lot for you to be holding you to ransom or maybe you are a simp and not man enough, a house wife who can't do basic chores is not wifable

I didn’t beg her to marry me. I do dishes because I felt she will appreciate my support even in the kitchen but she has pushed that to me. If she has a lot of plate in the sink she will leave it for me

CryptoClub2018:
Without reading what you wrote, I'm sure you are wrong

Maybe you should read and point out where I got it wrong.

I will be concise and as straight to the point as possible and will appreciate people’s advice or suggestions especially married folks.
I got married first week of August this year. This is just three months of marriage.
We didn’t have long courtship because she’s based in a different location and hardly visits.
Now we are married, I’ve started seeing things I don’t really like and is giving me concern. I’ve called her to have a close heart to heart talk but each time I do that it normally ends in quarrels.

These are the issues, I’m a neat person and even before marriage I do my chores myself. I hardly eat outside because I cook all type of food and store in deep freezer and I’m the type that likes things to be neat and environment tidy.
But my wife is the opposite. My wife hardly wash dishes. If she does it she will be feeling like she has done one big job or so. For the past three months we got married I have been the one washing dishes most of the time. Plates will fill the sink she will ignore it until I wash and clean everywhere. Hardly will you see her sweep the room or even mob. I do cleaning of the room and the last time it was mob I was the one.
I made sure I got her stuffs she needs to be comfortable. I got her a washing machine but I will still be the one to load clothes in the washer and even when she does that, she will keep them for me to go downstairs and hang after washing and still bring them back when completely dried.
I do those things without complaining but recently it has turned to be my duty that even when I’m not around and she wash, she will keep them for me to come home and hang them downstairs.
For three weeks our room has not been swept. Just this night I felt really bad seeing many plates in the kitchen sink and she just ignored all.

Not as if she’s working. We are planning on securing a shop for her because she is a business person and still does business online currently and most of her reason according to her why she doesn’t do most chores is because she said she’s always talking to customers on chat. I’ve asked her what of people that manages several business so they don’t have time for their family? I’m just being skeptical starting up a business for her because since she’s doing this way when she has not started a full blown business, how will she do when she’s now managing big business.

I do cook well and most often she relegate cooking to me. Is either she cook one and beg me to cook the other. I’ve been so down and that’s not what I bargained for.

I complained bitterly about her action this night and she’s threatening me with divorce. We are just married for three months and the way it is going now I don’t think I can’t bear this going forward.
She got angry this evening because I told her that the way she keeps house untidy that just very soon my coming back here will be to just come home and sleep and leave the next morning because I’m tired. She got angry and started moving her things from our room to the visitors room with a threat of divorce. I don’t know what to do.