₦airaland Forum

ToriBlue:
Marry the new guy.

Thanks dear

peter0071:
I would advice you to look before you leap... First of all, do you have a marriage mentor (Someone you look up to?) if you do, then meet the person and discuss these matters with the person... and critically analyse both men... can you cope with their weaknesses? cos marriage is not a child's play... Speaking from experience.... Selah

Thanks

elyna:
hello op, I know you've made up ur mind on who to settle with and I'm a hundred percent sure its number two, and you're feeling quite bad you wish so much it were number one but life doesn't work that no one hear can tell u what you wish to hear its your life and its time for u to gamble. first of all put your age into consideration, then from the time you spent with the first guy is he the kind that keeps to his words? you don't love number two so give it more thought have a serious talk with the first guy then you'll get your answer. don't make a mistake you might never be able to correct

Thank u

DonGalilo:
U welcome.
Don't u think there is a difference between a God fearing and a religious man?
Ponder over this.

There is really, perhaps i should have said he is God fearing cos dats what I actually meant.

mytym:
By

This is the least of your worries...Diction? U must be kidding. As in Phone-tics


Your immediate concerns God Forbid should be what if he changes attitude after marriage....

God stopped approving since Adam/Eve...
Pray and Watch, be wise, discern aright, don't fantasize (you already doing that for the new dude)

If u choose him...You can playfully become his language tutor...Love is the most powerful will mankind respond to, also the most powerful motivation for any action.

Thank you

DonGalilo:
My advice is, if u know that the first guy is not the cheating type that may later come back from abroad with another girl claiming u are no longer on the same level with him as his reason, you can choose to wait for him because there is a tendency to connect easily and grow up together from grass to grace.
If your instinct tells otherwise, I think it is better you go for the second guy to avoid wasting your time. Are u sure this second man doesn't have a child or children out of wedlock, because it is difficult to find a rich man in this present day Naija in his 40s not being disturbed by females, but if u are alright, no problem.
Concerning his English, na English u won chop? If u are not OK with his English, u squeeze out time to teach him or you advice him to get a private tutor.

Hmmm first guy is a "fine boy" who has d tendencies of cheating be it at or against his own will as girls are always chasing.
To the best of my knowledge, he has never been married and have got no kids. Also, he is a very religious person hence has got very slim chances of cheating.
Great idea on getting a private tutor but I hope he doesn't get embarrassed or offended at my suggestion.
Many thanks

Mustiboy:
if the one hustling is still serious with you, I'd advice you stick with him.
the new guy, you say, doesn't have the Lilly traits you want in a man but is readily made. my sister, it's not all about the money. are you sure you're gonna be able to cope with him when you get married? when probably he'll start exhibiting behaviours he had been keeping lockdown before?
think twice. a mistake in things like this leaves forever, a scar on one's heart.
best of luck

Ok thanks

Drixxx:
When life gives you Lemon,you make lemonade with it,Money and riches can vanish in a flash....a word is enough.

What's your point sir

wemmieslim:
My sister, don't be decieved, all that glitters ain't gold, don't jump into the stream to start complaining of cold again, the first guy has everything you want in a man but not made(Yet), in his case, patience is the key, the other guy has all the money but his standard you feel is appalling, you can groom him, after all you're going to be his helpmate even though it's obvious the money is already entering your eyes, my dear, thread softly, nobody will make a pick for you, you'll still do it yourself, firstly, take it to God in prayers, and secondly, follow your heart, as bad as poverty is, nobody wanna be in a marriage where there's no peace, money will buy you happiness but not fulfilment.

Thanks for your input
Money not entering eyes oo lol

wemmieslim:
My sister, don't be decieved, all that glitters ain't gold, don't jump into the stream to start complaining of cold again, the first guy has everything you want in a man but not made(Yet), in his case, patience is the key, the other guy has all the money but his standard you feel is appalling, you can groom him, after all you're going to be his helpmate even though it's obvious the money is already entering your eyes, my dear, thread softly, nobody will make a pick for you, you'll still do it yourself, firstly, take it to God in prayers, and secondly, follow your heart, as bad as poverty is, nobody wanna be in a marriage where there's no peace, money will buy you happiness but not fulfilment.

Thanks for your input
Money not entering eyes lol.

firstking01:
Make hay while the sun shines.

Okay thank u

JuicyLucy:
Forget both and start again. One guy will waste your time while you wait and the other guy is not your type. You will be settling for the other guy and that will cause trouble in the long run.

Thanks

firstking01:
My beloveth sister, i'm sure you 've heard the old adage that says a bird at hand is better than trillions in the forest but then, ensure you have convincing reasons to why you can't wait for your supposed "fiancee" abroad to come back...make every effort to let him know that you can NO longer wait for him as time is NOT on your side...the reason for this is, should incase he comes back tomorrow and want to do gragra then you can now have something to stand with...my lil bite tho.

Thanks,like I said the distance between us is already affecting the relationship as calls aren't as regular as it used to be, his attitude etc

olac21:
You really want the second guy because of his wealth but you feel very appalled by his english presentation..hmm anyway seek God's face...

Not at all.. not necessarily cos of his wealth. Even wen I see every of his other side as okay, d grammar is a total put off. Thanks

chomytex:
The thing that's confusing u is that this new guy is already made!
And there's no guarantee that the first guy will marry u.
just follow ur heart

Really difficult thanks

Alondra:
Sometimes life plays a painful game on us. Always bringing things in halves,It is our choice to either settle for the halves or make them complete as a whole. Whichever your decision will be it must come from the heart so the result won't hurt. Follow your heart Ma.

Thank u

tee59:
Go and seek God' face on dat. He wil guide u well.

What if God approves this second guy how do I cope with his way of speaking that's my only problem here. Thank u

2dice01:
its obvious the new guy is winning already even before the match kickoff

How do u mean. He seems really serious I'm just confused as outlined

Hello nairalanders please assist to advise a sister. Story in brief, i am a young lady in my early thirties, dating a young guy whom we planned getting married together until he travelled out and distance set in as a barrier, now I have another suitor whom I never took seriously until I was convinced of his intentions etc.
The issue here is this, the former who travelled out is one who possesses all the qualities I seek in a man except for the fact that he is still hustling and trying to make it as a man which I really had no problem with as I was ready to stand by him to achieve all these. Next is this other guy , the latter has not much of the qualities I need in a man but he is already made, wealthy etc although never been married no kids as he is more mature in his early 40's also, his English, hmm, very appalling but he is ready to settle down like right now.
Please advise, especially the ladies if in my shoes, how would u handle? Thank u