₦airaland Forum

Sarcasm

I'm in a bar with some crazy dudes and in the bar with us was a couple but far from our table. One of the dudes on my table was a bit drunk $ decided 2show his immaturity. Being large in size, stood up as if he wanted 2 say somtin serious; he shouted" Attention plz!". D bar was a bit quiet and all eyes were on him. D next tin we heard was a fart that sounded like the crash-sound of Dana aircraft(fwwwwwwwWuuuuuuuuuuuuupioooooootintin!). Some peeps laughed on continue dia biz.
The couple there in was upset from d luk on dia face and d man said to the dude " hey, U̶̲̥̅̊ just fart before my wife. I think U̶̲̥̅̊ shud apologize". The dude still standing said " Sorry ma, I didn't know it was Your turn".





Heavenly feeling

I traveled in late †̥o a friends place and as we prep 4a performance that night we overheard d next door neighbor arguing over something. I call it something coz it wasn't clear to me until d last statement.

Man: blah, blah, blah, blah....

Woman: ayiyiyiyiyiye ayiyiyyiye

Man: slilli shin shin sili. Mtsheew!

Woman: Abegi!

Man; ђã†̥?

Woman: U̶̲̥̅̊ Kom †̥oo quick!

Man: $hhit! U̶̲̥̅̊ Kom too late! I've bin here 2wks. I have a job!




Which side are U̶̲̥̅̊ on?

A liitle gurl ask d mother how creation came about and d mum said- God created Adam$Eve; They gave birth and their children gave bith and it continued that way. So I gave birth 2u. The little caught up with her Dad and also directed the same question to him. The Dad answered " Well,their is ђã†̥ we call revolution and mutation. We evolved from monkeys.

The little gurl puzzled, went back 2d mother and repeated ђã†̥ the father had said. The mother held her close and said "I am sorry 4d confusion my dear. U̶̲̥̅̊ see, I told U̶̲̥̅̊ my family side of the story. Your dad told U̶̲̥̅̊ his.