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The Nigerian Man(Satire) - Literature - Nairaland

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Who Invented The Molue? A Satire / Jking- Satire, Parody, Adventureit / An Insightful View Of The Nigerian Psyche (2) (3) (4)

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The Nigerian Man(Satire) by ebamma(m): 1:00am On Oct 22, 2012
To be a man is not a day's job, he says, he is the nigerian man,He always creates a mountain out of a mere hill.
He Loves using his brawn instead of his brain.
He just bought a new car,with excitement he rides the car with full speed and had an accident,he was lucky to escape with minor injuries,but the car was damaged beyond repair
He calls a towing van and tows the car to a panel beater,after settling the price of repairs he goes to his house to rest
Somebody must be responsible for this,he says, he remembers his grandmother who is 80yrs old,that woman must be a witch he says,she doesn't want me to be rich.
He nevers accepts his shortcomings,every wrong that befalls him is always blamed on the unknown.
He loves being told that somebody is responsible for his predicament,and that's what his pastor does best,his pastor had told him that his grandmother and mother are responsible for him not being rich.
He stops visiting his mother in the village and refuses to welcome her when she visits him in the city, Go away you witch he tells her
He pays his tithes and sows seed in his church,God loves a cheerful giver the pastor says,he shakes his head in affirmation,but never questions his self whether the tithes truly reach God's hand
His pastor wears the latest clothes rides the latest cars and preaches with an Ipad,His clothes are cheap, he picks a cab to church and he is still using his nokia 3310 since 2004.
As he leaves for work on monday on the way he kicks his leg on a stone and picks a minor wound,the witches are at it again he says.

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