I was recently blessed with a baby and my mum has come to help nurse the baby. However she has turned to a living hell for me and my wife. She has been nagging about everything. She complains about the food, the house everything, I love her very much and don't know how to complain to her without worsening the situation. She has never had any problems with my wife before now. The only person that I could complain to is far away in the north so I am at a crossroad on what to do. Please advise

u might wanna take a trip to the north ohh and tell her hubby 2 come and take her, isn't da mother of the lady suppose 2 be dere or is she no more? take heart and take it easy, lata

Almost all mothers nag. Just be patient with her. _{I know it's not easy.}

Are you sure that you're a man? You better send your mum away before she destroys your marriage!

From the bottom of my heart I am begging you to tell her to leave the two of you. if she has come to help, then she must be helpful. if she's bringing you help instead of help then you should let her leave and get a grown maid who would give your wife and mother of your child the proper respect.

If you can't do that, I pity your wife. Poor woman. Please be a man and take this definite step.

On a second thought, why don't you sit her down and tell her how you feel?

Nigerian parents are not brought up to listen to their children. It is not just done.

They are also incapable of change. You cannot change an adult - that is, anyone over 18.

The only solution is to politely nudge the mom back to her home so she can entertain her own husband.

just ignore them and don't let em ruin ur life
my mom gets on my nerves all d time and i cnt wait to leave d hse 4 her dis sept. her own is too much

It realy is not easy coping with a nagging woman. She's your mom, n i guess she should respect u more. Firstly, talk frankly n sincerely with due respect that u are not pleased with her attitude, then u could also ask ur dad to frankly talk to her if d first fails. Lastly, if she remains adamant, then u've got to ask her to leave politely n respectfuly or else she might cause a whole lotta other things btwn u and ur wife.

Don't you think asking her to leave would be considered as rude and disrespectful?

we should all understand that "nagging" is a stage of life for a woman. Even if she doesnt have grandchildren/isnt married at all, she still naggs. She would nag at neighbors etc,

As men and women get older, they tend to be very irritated with the most little things. They would complain from right to left. They would wish everything was perfect, tho they cant make it perfect themselves.

About a nagging mother in the home, as a man, its best to site mummy down, let her know what is obtainable. And if your ol-man is still around, why not ask him to come take her, or say mommy, lets go see daddy, and if it means leaving the car there, find your way back. Besides, she should know what date she whould be leaving/how long she is to stay with you and your wife, before she even arrives.

Babymine, that's y i said politely n respectfully, it might hurt but its needed sometyms.

ok oh!

kick ur mom out ,no wait sorry i meant to say tune her out

it is the woman's mother who comes around to help not the guy's mother.
after all when a wife's mother arrives , it is to help her daughter who has given birth.
husband's mother comes with the intention to help but ends up strutting around 'her son's house' checking for dust!

babymine:

On a second thought, why don't you sit her down and tell her how you feel?

Sit a nagging mother down and talk to her? you've gotta be kiddin. things will just get worse, your wife will be accused of trying to paint your poison ur mind against ur mom, she'll cry and and cry that u don't appreciate her, etc.
My word is, just let her go!!! Thank her for the service so far but u feel u and ur wife need to learn to cope with the pressures on ur own, smth like that sha! Though mite not be easy if u dont have time or finances to employ a good nanny

i had the same problem about the time you were having yours. my supposedly quite mother in law complained about the food and quietly tried to take over my houe help by changing the rules in the house.
the only solution is if she leaves. that was when i had peace. the worst thing was that i was doing al the cooking and nursing straight from the time i gave birth, it was hell. only God saw me through cause there were times i wanted her to have it straight,
next time, it's definitely not going to be her. my mother still works anyway.
so in summary, the solution is patience until she leaves

i feel u just handle the situation with care or else your wife will be in your mother's bad book forever. u know mothers are quick to acuse their daughter inlaws of turning their son against them a child she care in her womb for nine months bla bla bla what she cant do to her daughter who is married she'll do to her daughter inlaw.just plead with your wife to be patient for the love of u.

The solution is patience only if your husband is not understanding.
If he's understanding the solution is to escort the mother back home.

I wonder why no one thinks its wrong though,  that parents never listen to their children in Nigeria. It's really unfair and the only excuse you get is, "It's against our culture".  I still think he should tell her, sit her down and make her understand the situation. And the wife should make herself scarce if she values her life!

You are a man and the man in your own house.
You are a family man and i think your wife comes first now and all the nagging might not even be good for the child, so i think it is time you tell Mom, she is appreciated and time for her to go back to her husband.