Packaging’ and ‘Dr. Gungo’: Two of a kind
This is a work of fiction. Resemblance with real life situation is mere coincidence

Season 1
Episode 1
‘Hei, my God wetin I wan do with this now. E be like say I go just sit down for my house jeje ni o. I no fit come and go and die for another man’s land all in the name of service to my fatherland. But I share part if not all the blame sha o. Na so na, na myself I suppose blame. If to say I don go service teytey, I sabi say this kind thing no go happen. But, that man sef do me wayo o. Anywhere you dey now, Dr..........’
Tunde momentarily came back from his long sojourn to the land of thoughts as the bus conveying him from Akure back to Lagos was stopped by a short man in a black Khaki outfit holding a shining black rod of barely a diameter of five centimetres and a length not very much greater than an arm’s length- A rod that has hardly harmed a fly in the last six months. From his look, one need not tell even a five year old Nigerian that the man is a member of the Nigerian police force. Tunde, sitting directly behind the driver unintentionally looked the man straight in the eye, but the latter moved his gaze away from Tunde’s direction in order to pay full attention to his client. Although, most of the passengers in the bus knew little or nothing about what had transpired between the duo within the first thirty seconds of the undesirable interruption of their voyage, but they understood fully when their driver finally said ‘market no dey and fuel don cost’. They were not surprised as proceedings didn’t fall short what they had earlier anticipated. Nigerian police and twenty naira, truly inseparable!
As the journey continued, Tunde could not but ponder over his life as an undergraduate. It was at this instant he realised how priceless the words of his father was. Tunde’s father, though not a very rich man, yet he is not a member of the lower class in the society. He could be considered as being some steps above the middle class. Mr. Fabiyi, Tunde’s father is an employee in a private firm at Lagos. He is an easygoing man who suffered a great deal before making it to the post of the assistant general manager of B&B holdings. More often than not he advises people that are younger (Tunde inclusive) to do what they had to do without hesitation because there might not be tomorrow. ‘Do whatever you have to do on time and don’t give way to bad company because bad company corrupts good manners’. These and many more were the wise words of Mr. Fabiyi that sounds to Tunde’s hearing most times like the noise of an old generating set that urgently needs the service of an engineer.
An oldman once said: “I don’t wish that you heed my warnings immediately I advice you, because you will only appreciate it better when you refuse to take to them and meet your water loo”. This exactly is the present situation Tunde had found himself. His father’s words now worth a billion to him, but from all indications it seems it’s almost late. Now, it’s just like crying when the head is off, more like campaigning after election and not too distant from the police emergence few hours after robbery.
Tunde, a brilliant boy from his day one in nursery school up to S.S.S 3 was one of the surprises of Mr. Taliat. Mr. Taliat was the chemistry Teacher of Exploit College where Tunde was once a student. When Tunde was in S.S.S 1, first term to be precise, he had dazed the chemistry teacher in one of the weekly quiz competition between S.S.S 3A & S.S.S3B. The last chemistry question was: what is catenation? The silence that followed the question could be likened to that of a grave yard located on the outskirt of a town. Nobody knew the answer. Surprisingly, a fresh S.S.S 1 student is raising his hand from the audience seat. Mr. Taliat, though sceptical about getting the right answer from S.S.S 1, gave Tunde the chance to express himself. ‘Yes, Fabiyi’ he said giving Tunde the signal to speak.
‘It’s the ability of carbon to form a long chain with itself’. He said
The entire hall was still silent. The students do not know if that was the correct answer. They were all waiting for Mr. Taliat to tell him to sit down, but on the contrary, he shouted “clap for him”. Mr. Taliat latter found out that he heard it from a T.V programme. Throughout his secondary school days, he was the best and the teachers hoped the sky would be his limit. Little wonder, while his mates were struggling with UTME, he passed it on the first attempt and effortlessly defied the next embargo – PostUTME. With such high hope in view, It’s sad (or can one not even say it’s not sad) that he struggled to graduate from the university.
Tunde could not help the tears coming out of his heavy eyes as the bus zooms on and on, he wished he had not met that bitch, ‘Gungo’ . He wished Gungo was not even his subordinate, let alone being his boss. “Haa, Dr. Gungo. Not only ‘Gungo’, I wish I had not met Tobi. I wish Kunle never knew I existed. Yet, worst of all, I wish ‘Gungo’ had died before I gained admission. Dr. Gungo, anywhere you dey now, na God go.....................

To be continued

Episode 2
‘Dr.Gungo, anywhere you dey now, na God go punish you’, he thought with the bitterness boldly written on his face.
The 14th day of January was Tunde’s first day on campus as a student of Federal University of Technology, Akure popularly referred to as FUTA. After walking few kilometres around the campus, moving from one office to the other, he came across a buttery very close to the ‘university bookshop’, he decided to quench his thirst which he seem not to have notice for the past one hour, given his tight schedule. He was about collecting his five naira change when a hand tapped him from the back. He looked back, and to his utter amazement, standing directly behind him was ‘smarto’. ‘Unbelievable! Smarto on this campus’, he said to himself before embracing him as he screamed ‘smarto! smarto!’
‘wetin you come do for this campus?’
‘Na me suppose dey ask you that kind question o. I bestalite now’, replied smarto
‘Stalite?’Tundeexpressed surprise, standing akimbo with his left hand on his hip and the right holding loosely the sachet of water.
Of course, he has every reason to be surprised because no one ever thought ‘smarto’ could make it to a Polytechnic, let alone being a student in a University of this calibre. Kunle, popularly known as ‘smarto’ during his days at Exploit College was the most stubborn student in the school in those days. Exploit College operates both boarding and day programme. Kunle and Tunde stay in the same block in the boys hostel. Kunle was a year ahead of Tunde. He is very fond of terrorising the students of the lower classes. He finds it interesting breaking rules and this gives the highest rank among his partners-in-crime. He breaks into the school orchard at will. To him, having sex with girls in classrooms at night is one of the things that make a ‘big boy’. Kunle has been getting away with a whole lot of indecencies before Uche’s saga.
Kunle has tried all possible means to have an illicit affair with Bimpe who stays at the female hostel but all to no avail. Infact, there was a time he started attending fellowship regularly, thinking Bimpe who was well known as a ‘spiritkoko’ (A name given to an incessant church goer). When he realised Bimpe was proving hard to get, he threatened to make life unbearable for Bimpe’s brother who was then in J.S.S 2 since there is nothing he could do to Bimpe, considering the fact that they are in the same class. Hoping Bimpe would take the bait, he waited for two weeks, but nothing changed. There was an Igbo guy called Uche that sells meet pie at the school entrance during the break. Kunle has approached Uche several times to have a meet pie free of charge claiming that Uche has to pay for space he occupies, but Uche has always refused bluntly, most times not without abusing Kunle.
‘You useless boy. Come carry everything. Na your papa give me the money for this business. Onyechi’, Uche will shout on Kunle on few occasions or worse still send him to Coventry.
Kunle took his time to punish both Uche and Bimpe (through her brother). ‘Killing two birds with a stone will be interesting’, he said to himself as he finished discussing his plan with his partners.
The entrance of Exploits College is very close to an untarred road which separates the gate from the bush on the other side of the road. Immediately after the bell goes for break, Kunle ordered one of his aides to carefully hide inside the bush and execute the first phase of the plan which is to shatter one of the rectangular glasses that make the box with which Uche displays hisgoods.
When a policeman slaps a man and later found out he had slapped a soldier’s son, he apologises by saying ‘I’m following orders’. In the same vein, Kunle’s aide followed orders and executed the plan in a more creative way by using a catapult.
‘Paaaaa! The fairly big stone hit the glass. At first, Uche almost took to his heels because it happened all of a sudden. While wondering who could have done it, a boy came around and said ‘it’s me’. Uche could not control his anger, he gave the boy the beating of his life. He slapped him as he kicked simultaneously. Uche was too furious to listen to the boy’s utterances. Luckily, a teacher was passing. He liberated the boy from Uche and dragged them both to the principal’s office.
‘How dare you beat up a student of this school?’ the principal shouted on top of his voice.
‘E break my glass’
‘What? Why did you do something as nasty as that?’ the principal inquired angrily facing the young boy whose eye is now swollen.
‘No. I didn’t break it. Uncle...........hmmmmm’
‘Uncle what? Speak up’. The principal shouted.
‘Uncle Kunle said I should go and tell him it’s me.’
Kunle had it all planned. Immediately the glass broke, he instructed the boy to go and tell Uche that ‘it’s me.’ Uche taught he was saying his mind and consequently pounced on him. The principal got angry and had him expelled. With all these in view, it was difficult for anyone to think Kunle made it to FUTA.
‘How you do am then?’ Tunde asked hoping to know how he did it.
‘O boy, I pass UTME anyhow sha and 200 na the cutoff for postUTME for people like you. No be people like me wey get person like my dad for back. With my 196, I carry head enter Physics o’
‘Na lie o. Sebi 200 na the cut off for postUTME.’ Tunde replied with surprise boldly written on his face.
‘I don tell you say na for people like you. Which department you come dey o? ’
‘Na Elect Elect I wan do but them give me Biochemistry’
‘Na you now. You go cope now.’smarto replied folding his arms.
Work started on the 21st day of January throughout the entire campus of FUTA..................
To Be continued................

I wish to know what you think about this write-up. please, i'm waiting.

Nice one, please continue

okay. expect episode 2 by tomorrow.15/04/2013