I hate my brother.i don't know if i'm a bad person but my parents are always comparing me to him.sometimes,i feel like he should maybe just make a mistake like fail his exams or something.help i feel like i'm a bad person

Sometimes he makes me feel like crap.he has done nothing to deserve my hatred but i just don't know.i guess its my parents always praising and being like why can't u be more like ur brother.

Pele....take am easy

Though, its wrong for your parents to like or prefer your brother to you, its wrong of them to show favouritism and prefence openly, but why dont you emulate the good attributes of your brother instead of hating him. He has done absolutely nothing to deserve your hatred, so stop hating and start loving and emulating him to attract your parents' love also.
Meanwhile, approach your parents humbly and let them know that, they are killing your moralle by ignoring you and showimg favouritism and preference to your brother and promise them to have a change of attitude henceforth.
Also, tell them to always pray for you and you also pray to God to melt, change and renew your stoney heart.
May God help you and all of us.

@all parents, this is what favouritism and preference among one's children causes and its high time we, as parents start changing our attitude and orientation as regards this, even, if we, as human human beings are naturally like that, because of the differences in attitude of this children, we dont have to make it so open and obvious to the extent of one hating the other or one feeling like committing suicide.
May God help us all.

greatgod2012: Though, its wrong for your parents to like or prefer your brother to you, its wrong of them to show favouritism and prefence openly, but why dont you emulate the good attributes of your brother instead of hating him. He has done absolutely nothing to deserve your hatred, so stop hating and start loving and emulating him to attract your parents' love also.
Meanwhile, approach your parents humbly and let them know that, they are killing your moralle by ignoring you and showimg favouritism and preference to your brother and promise them to have a change of attitude henceforth.
Also, tell them to always pray for you and you also pray to God to melt, change and renew your stoney heart.
May God help you and all of us.

thank u but for some reason,i don't think i will be able to tell my parents how i feel.my bro is cool and i don't know why i keep praying for his downfall.maybe to teach my parents a lesson

greatgod2012: @all parents, this is what favouritism and preference among one's children causes and its high time we, as parents start changing our attitude and orientation as regards this, even, if we, as human human beings are naturally like that, because of the differences in attitude of this children, we dont have to make it so open and obvious to the extent of one hating the other or one feeling like committing suicide.
May God help us all.

thank u.the thing is they don't know it makes me feel bad if its not my bro,it's our neighbour's kids i just need to find a way to start ignoring my parents

No need to pray for his downfall but that God will uplift yo so that you will both be rocks in the stead of your parents

People are put into out lives for a reason, emulate the good tings he has but live your life for you

remove all hate from you so that you will also obtain mercy

Are u in uni or working etc

biolabee: No need to pray for his downfall but that God will uplift yo so that you will both be rocks in the stead of your parents

People are put into out lives for a reason, emulate the good tings he has but live your life for you

remove all hate from you so that you will also obtain mercy

Are u in uni or working etc

yeah mabe that's what i'll do.i'm currently seeking admission and my brother just graduated from uni bear in mind he's 6yrs older.i also have good qualities can't they see that

Eh ya.. Pele

Some parents take sibling favoritism a bit far but remember you have your own life to lead


You have to believe in yourself for you that you have what it takes to succeed and that you will excel


Since your major goal is admission

Focus on strenghts on that, it may be local or abroad

Also identify someone who is responsible in your church who can take the role of a mentor

Someone online too can suffice that you can be emailing who can advise and guide you in respect of your career
This is important because it seems you have too many negative feelings which are not making you happy

It's a matter of time; they will acknowledge you

It is well wit you

captainnigeria: yeah mabe that's what i'll do.i'm currently seeking admission and my brother just graduated from uni bear in mind he's 6yrs older.i also have good qualities can't they see that

captainnigeria: Sometimes he makes me feel like crap.he has done nothing to deserve my hatred but i just don't know.i guess its my parents always praising and being like why can't u be more like ur brother.

I take it that you are the black sheep of the family? It will get worse. He will be more successful and your hate will grow into resentment. He will have a better woman, car, house, career and you will always be in awe of him. Then he will keep you at arms length because secretly he knows you hate him.

The only way to prevent all this is to try and change your ways and try to appreciate him more.

Ur hatred stems from jealousy,ignited by ur parents.
Never pray for his downfall,rather pray to God for your upliftment,and with time,you too can be a force to reckon with.

This is one of the shortcoming of open favouritism by parents,have they forgotten the story of Joseph in the bible easily?

biolabee: Eh ya.. Pele

Some parents take sibling favoritism a bit far but remember you have your own life to lead


You have to believe in yourself for you that you have what it takes to succeed and that you will excel


Since your major goal is admission

Focus on strenghts on that, it may be local or abroad

Also identify someone who is responsible in your church who can take the role of a mentor

Someone online too can suffice that you can be emailing who can advise and guide you in respect of your career
This is important because it seems you have too many negative feelings which are not making you happy

It's a matter of time; they will acknowledge you

It is well wit you

yeah thanks although i'm muslim and i think i'll take the online advice

Hmm .. Then you can get someone in the mosque

Preferred option is face to face mentoring since you are still coming up

Also it can be an uncle or cousin but someone who is mature and you think will be discreet

captainnigeria: yeah thanks although i'm muslim and i think i'll take the online advice

This is a dangerous dimension of which you have to take off your mind as this could lead to murder.

Your brother is your blood and you should not pray for his downfall no matter what your parents are doing to you.

If your brother is doing well and your parents figure you are not as good as him, sit down and ask yourself a question, why can't I strife to do better than him so that I see what my parents reaction will be.

You can make it and put the devil to shame.Though your parents are not handling the case well, but since you are still young, strive to do better than your brother and do away with envy as God will not forgive you if you harm your blood brother out of envy since you have started praying for his downfall.

We had another posting like this recently.
May be you are not true son of your father and that is why your parents prefer your brother.
You shoud ask / find out if you are true son, there might be dark sekret in your past to find out.

Also are you being true man about this or crying like girl, this may be why your parents do not respect you.
If you brother is manly and successful but you go round crying and complaining they might think you are man lover and so hate you.

worry 359: We had another posting like this recently.
May be you are not true son of your father and that is why your parents prefer your brother.
You shoud ask / find out if you are true son, there might be dark sekret in your past to find out.

Also are you being true man about this or crying like girl, this may be why your parents do not respect you.
If you brother is manly and successful but you go round crying and complaining they might think you are man lover and so hate you.

i'm pretty sure my dad is my biological father don't ask me how i know and i do not cry around infact they have made me very withdrawn in the house.about my brother being successful,he doesn't even have a job.he's in his nysc year

andyanders: This is a dangerous dimension of which you have to take off your mind as this could lead to murder.

Your brother is your blood and you should not pray for his downfall no matter what your parents are doing to you.

If your brother is doing well and your parents figure you are not as good as him, sit down and ask yourself a question, why can't I strife to do better than him so that I see what my parents reaction will be.

You can make it and put the devil to shame.Though your parents are not handling the case well, but since you are still young, strive to do better than your brother and do away with envy as God will not forgive you if you harm your blood brother out of envy since you have started praying for his downfall.

thanks i will ensure it doesn 't lead to murder

Some parents are always do like that.

Take you parents comments with good heart and be prayerful and be more hardworking in your studies, may God help you and always be with you.

You can also discuss the issue of the comments with your parents.

juman: Some parents are always do like that.

Take you parents comments with good heart and be prayerful and be more hardworking in your studies, may God help you and always be with you.

You can also discuss the issue of the comments with your parents.

nope never ever will i discuss it will them.my parents are not ur average nigerian parent that u can discuss anything with.

.

OP, when you're parents are old, they will regret comparing you with your brother and engendering your hatred for him. But by then it will be way too late.

Some ppl need to go to parenting school b4 they can be allowed have babies.

Why exactly do you hate him?

It is common for our parents to compare us with our siblings or even our friends. To them it is a way of encouraging us: but in most cases, the effect on us is usually negative. But as for hating your brother, please don't: Some people will give almost anything to have one.

If your father physically or emotionally abuses your mom, it is possible that she will also transfer that aggression and pain to you. Sorry, don't internalize anything.


Be strong~

Spirit of negativity, envy and unhealthy competition is the worst type of spirit you can have. It never ends well. You either end up harming others or everyone runs away from you. You may think no one sees it, but what we feel inside with time manifest itself in so many ways outside.

captainnigeria: thank u.the thing is they don't know it makes me feel bad if its not my bro,it's our neighbour's kids i just need to find a way to start ignoring my parents

comparizm I Tell 'ya is a bad illness.
op...kindly leave your parents abode.

That is called the CAIN syndrome, I hope his name is not ABEL.

Op, try channel that hatred to love, draw close to him and try yr best to fall in love with some of his traits, convert it to positive energy. Like u said, yr parents still compare you to neighbours so this has nothing to do with your brother. Let this be your motivation to suceed at whatever you do and pls try not to be a rebel in the family, you will only cause headache for yrself and years down the road, u would ve so many regrets. Love yr parents no matter what and the little compliment they pay you, cherish it with all your heart.