Well let me start by saying traditionally there is only 1 wedding in Nigeria which of course is the traditional wedding .Until recent times this was the focus of celebration and till today the only recognized wedding by the elders.
We adopted religion and that for sure means you must marry in a church .
However,the focus still in terms of spending and celebration had until recently been the traditional wedding.The church itself has never asked for much in terms of show off or spending and only focus on the ritual itself.
The actual cost of spending on traditional wedding varies from tribe to tribe.
Then enters the so called white reception.A concept which is purely foriegn and has no traditonal value to Nigerians.
Yet within a space of not so many years some Nigerian women has "rewritten" the code unoffically to give it a new look.Omitting parts which does not favour them and then keeping those that do favour them.Their interpretion is largely based on what they want rather then what is.
Make no mistake there is nothing traditional about white reception and is totally adopted .
http://www.todays-weddings.com/articles/whopays.php is the way it is done normally.
BRIDE/BRIDE'S FAMILY:
- Any needed rental items
- Arrange for accommodations for out of town guests* (grooms family can also arrange this, depending on whose hometown the wedding is taking place at)
- Bridesmaids wedding gifts
- Ceremony Costs (Church fee, etc.)
- Ceremony Decorations
- Ceremony/Reception Flowers
- Entertainment (DJ, Band, Harp, etc.)
- Favors
- Flowers (bridesmaids bouquets, all corsages, ceremony)
- Gratuities/Tips for services
- Grooms wedding gift
- Grooms wedding ring
- Guest Book
- Her blood tests/medical checkup
- Invitations, thank you cards, announcements, mailing expenses, etc.
- Lingerie
- Photographer
- Printed items such as napkins, matchbooks, etc.
- Programs
- Reception costs (hall fee, etc.)
- Videographer
- Wedding Breakfast
- Wedding Consultant/Coordinator's Fee
- Wedding Dress, Veil and accessories


GROOM/GROOM'S FAMILY:
- Accessories for men in wedding party, such as socks, gloves, etc.
- Alcohol at the reception
- Arrange for accommodations for out of town guests* (brides family can also arrange this, depending on whose hometown the wedding is taking place at)
- Bride's wedding gift
- Bride's wedding rings
- Flowers (Brides bouquet, all boutonnieres)
- Groomsmens gifts
- His blood tests/medical checkup
- Honeymoon
- Limosine/Carriage costs
- Marriage License
- Officiant Fee
- Rehearsal Dinner expenses
- Wedding Attire


ATTENDANTS/USHERS:
- Any necessary travel expenses
- Shower gift
- Wedding attire and accessories
- Wedding gift for the newlyweds

Now if you look at this the majority of the cost falls on the bride's family with the groom getting away with most of it but the honeymoon.Note we have adopted the entire way of doing the reception but of course some has readopted the cost shelling the extremely expensive reception on the man and intrestingly enough keeping the honeymoon cost still on the man!
But the same people who gave us this  way of doing reception has learnt that in the modern society 50/50 is the only rational thing to do espically if its the woman(normally is) pushing for a large wedding .
So explain to me for those who seems to think the man carries the burden of the most expensive part of the wedding the reception and yet pays for the honeymoon.Where did this come from?
Surely those quoting this "new and improved" tradition they created are sending the wrong message to the man about how much they value his pocket or maybe even him.Women need to think properly about how they approach a foriegn concept and not change it as they desire.Even men who were willing to fill up the gaps in cost would now get apprehensive.
Its not a Nigerian tradtion  to start with.The white man who gave us the culture does not push the cost to the man but the woman but he too got reasonable and said split it between the 2 families.
So where does this idea come from?
I await the wraith of some women but i know on this forum they are many women who share the idea of partnership .

This women want big wedding and the man to pay for it.So much for love or showing how much you care for the man.
Bad start to marriage because it shows how large the event is means more then how much they care about their "love" pocket.