VACANCY! VACANCY!! VACANCY!!!

RIVERS STATE HOUSE OF ASSEMBLY is recruiting for the positions of her IMPEACHED SPEAKER and the other SUSPENDED MEMBERS.

Interested candidates should submit their applications as quickly as possible.

REQUIREMENTS:

• Applicants must be able to communicate in PIDGIN ENGLISH and be fluent in his LOCAL LANGUAGE.

• Must be an expert with an International Certificate (Chinese preferably) in TAEKWANDO/KARATE, BOXING & SPITTING.

• Must have five years’ experience in WEAPONS HANDLING with the skill of converting a MACE TO SWORD.

• Applicants must have full blood exams so as to confirm they have enough and ideal blood to shed for the Governor, President, President's Wife or any Minister when the need arises.

ROLES & RESPONSIBILITIES:

• Swift lying.

• Fighting for justice/injustice

• Representing themselves, the Governor, the President, President's Wife, & their pockets all in the State House of Assembly.

• Multi-tasking and flexibility with the readiness to oppose and support, to install and impeach the speaker. Making and alterations of laws and outsmarting the law enforcement agency to get a police officer to help you kick the ass of your opponent when the need arises.

• Must be ready to enjoy a nap and a quickie in a nearby hospital after every meeting of the house.

All applications should be sent to recruitment@rshoa.org or you visit their website for more information.

NOTE:

•LONG TERM MOTOR PARK(AGBERO) EXPERIENCE IS ALSO AN ADDED ADVANTAGE.

•ALSO, MEMBERSHIP OF A CULT GROUP WILL BE A VALUABLE ASSET.

Please, SHARE - don't be selfish with this, you might be helping a brother or a friend to get a VERY LUCRATIVE JOB!!!