On the 29th day of May 1999, Mumucracy was born in a place totally worthy of it:the giant of Africa. What other Nation can boast of been so unique that it gave birth to a form of Government never before seen on Earth? The Greeks gave birth to Democracy, so what? We have redefined it to suit our special needs and dare I say, it worked well till it’s unfortunate demise. In reality, it’s not dead but it soon will be judging by the various happenstances that we have witnessed. Infact its tomb is ready and come May 29 2015, Mumucracy will be lowered into the grave and gone forever from our lives. On that day, we will say goodbye to the “Government of the mumus, by the mumus and for the mumus”. On that day, we will experience something most of us in this generation have never experienced: relief. We will dance on the streets, we will jubilate, we will drink ourselves from bliss to bliss and we will thank history for making it our turn to break free from the cycle of tyranny. Then those mumus who have held us hostage for so long will wish they had learnt from Muhammad, Shah of Khwarezm.



In 1219, Muhammad received enormous gifts from Genghis khan who happened to be the new tribal leader of the east. Khan of course had ulterior motive principally the reopening of the silk route to Europe. He even offered to share the route with Muhammad which was a tactful acknowledgement of Muhammad’s superiority. Muhammad ignored this gracious offer out of arrogance. Then khan tripled the initial gift and sent it to Muhammad, however the consignment never got to its intended destination as it was seized by Inalchik who was the governor of a region close to Samarkand, the capital city. Khan was certain there was an error somewhere and sent a third emissary to Muhammad reiterating his offer and requesting punishment for Inalchik. Muhammad ordered khan’s messengers to be beheaded and sent two back to khan with shaved heads which was an abomination for the times.

Muhammad must have felt so powerful to the extent everyone else was his mumu to play with. However, the mumus weren’t mumus anymore. They had had enough of Muhammad and within a year, Khan raised an army to attack Samarkand. Inalchik was captured and was executed by having molten silver poured into his eyes and ears while Muhammad fled and in the end, khan not only had the silk route to himself, he became lord and master over an empire which comprises modern day Turkey and Afghanistan.In the end, the mumu won and there have been various other instances of the mumu triumphing. The mumus chased Ben Ari from Tunisia, they hounded Mubarak out of office in Egypt and many other mumus are still fighting to break free in other parts of the world.

What all these mumus from other parts of the world fail to realize is that the Nigerian mumu is unique. He’s slow to act, very fearful and almost always never leads the parade but when push comes to shove, he will have his way. The Nigerian mumu watched in silence as President Obasanjo was sworn in 1999. He endured the administration’s consistent increase of pump price of petroleum products despite the fact that Nigeria is an oil-producing nation. He watched in amazement as billions were appropriated for the electricity sector without any corresponding improvement in power supply.



The mumu was in this same Nigeria when he heard that there are actually two people named James Onanefe Ibori and that while one of them doesn’t have any record of existence, he was the one that was convicted of the crime of fraud in 1994 and that the only one who actually exists has never been convicted of a crime and can remain governor of Delta State. The mumu could see the handwriting on the wall but wetin him wan do? Then the mumu heard that a couple of politicians in the ruling party had collected a bribe of $250million to influence the award of contract of the national ID card project to Sagem. To him the figure seemed surreal and he felt it was probably fiction till a few persons were paraded in court. A few months later, one of them died while the others went on to live their lives with even one of them emerging as the National Chairman of the ruling party. The mumu felt he had heard the worst but then there was the Haliburton scandal, then Tafa Balogun, then Fabian Osuji, then he lost count.



By 2007, President Yar’adua was smuggled in but the mumu didn’t care. At least the new mantra “rule of law” was something he could relate with. The 7point agenda was easy to grasp and there seemed to be hope on the horizon. Then everything went to slow motion and started to go backwards in fast-forward till the president took his trip to Saudi-Arabia. The politicians kept playing plenty abracadabra but all the mumu cared about was to get his meal once or twice a day. It wasn’t his business what the “big men” and “the woman” did with the man in Aso-rock. Then some SMG people, at least that what they called them started to waka up and down Abuja shouting constitution this and constitution that. The mumu just kept wandering where they found the energy to engage in all this activity. Weren’t there people mumus like himself? Aren’t they supposed to leave the Abuja people alone and rather go and hustle for their own share of the Nigerian cake?



A short while later, the mumu had cause to smile when a mumu like himself stepped up to become president. When the mumu even stepped up in 2011 to remain in the position, the mumu wasn’t really sure of his antecedents but then he noticed that just like him, the mumu had no shoes growing up. The only difference is the Abuja mumu now has plenty shoes while he is still in search of his own. But then he decided to cast his vote for the Abuja mumu despite his hatred for his party and didn’t forget to use the Abuja mumu’s shoes as a point of contact to his own acquisition of shoes. He even felt a kind of Fresh air just at the thought of that and his smiles became wider. Even when the Abuja mumu released the names of his ministers which happened to include the same mumus who had rendered the nation moribund, the mumu still had hope that his fellow mumu will not let him down irrespective of the fresh air in Abuja.

Then realization hit him when he started hearing about subsidy removal. He didn’t know what it meant initially but then he created a Facebook profile(while thanking he Abuja mumu for bringing it to Nigeria) for himself and slowly he began to understand that petrol will increase in price from 65Naira to 147Naira. His first reaction was one of outrage, then anger, then he turned on his TV and heard the fat woman that coordinates everybody explaining that’s it’s for the betterment of the Country. It didn’t seem right but he trusted the Abuja mumu who had no shoes. Then they started saying they’d build refineries, roads, schools etc and he relaxed. After all his car doesn’t use too much fuel and his generator if the small one. He’d find a way to adjust and things will be alright.



His trust in the Abuja mumu was so much that despite all the evidence to show that the Abuja mumu was now completely immersed in Abuja things and was quickly relieving himself of everything to do with other mumus, he still had hope till one day when the veil left his eyes. The day started like any other and he didn’t have an inkling that anything extraordinary would happen. Even when the PHCN officials brought the bill, he was his normal, comported, mumuish self till he saw the figure. He immediately discovered he had long sightedness and had to call another mumu in the yard to verify the figure. The officials noticed the change in his demeanor and proceeded to explain that due to the recent privatization of PHCN, and other things which he didn’t understand neither did he bother to ask them to clarify, bills have increased and so in essence he will have to pay more for less. He said nothing to them, rather he went into his room, took out the bowl of eba that was leftover from the night before and started to demolish it but then he fell asleep before he could finish the task.



When he woke up, it was like he was a brand new person. He started to reflect on all the things he had taken for granted in the past because “it wasn’t his business” then he realized it was all indeed his business. The people in Abuja have gotten bolder as all of their actions go unchallenged . They appropriate billions to themselves and leave the mumus with nothing. Then he told himself: ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. Unknown to him, millions of mumus all around the nooks and cranny of Nigeria had come to the same realization via different media and circumstances. They had all decided that May 29 2015 is the day the final nail will be driven into the coffin Mumucracy. They have resolved that no longer will a group of people, party or associates hold the mumus to ransom and though they have not the strength of Genghis khan, they possess the frustration of Frank Norfleet and they will rundown all the swindlers wherever they may be at the federal, state or local government level. Be them in the executive, judiciary or legislature. Church, Mosque or Shrine . For the collective mumus, 2015 is do or die.


http://afolayinka./2013/08/06/rip-mumucracy-1999-2015/

Amen, 2015 is when it ends, the political class would beg and defend every vote they get with theor lives

Obiagelli: Amen, 2015 is when it ends, the political class would beg and defend every vote they get with theor lives

its now or never for nigerians.we have endured enough and frankly,the awareness of today is far greater than it was 3years ago.social media has helped keep people abreast of whats happening.people are now more interested in how they are been governed.debates are taking place everywhere and hopefully,2015 will be the time to turnaround the fortunes of this country. a time to escape the hegenomy called PDP which has demonstrated that its only desire is to fritter away our collective patrimony

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Like it or not some people would still display their mumulity,2015 is not yet around we've started displaying our mumulity insteadily of keenly observin the politics of dis our mumudom and who will be able free us,we are busy taking sides...Am keeping my options open till 2015 but one thing is for sure,PDP is not my option 4 now.

Fkforyou: Like it or not some people would still display their mumulity,2015 is not yet around we've started displaying our mumulity insteadily of keenly observin the politics of dis our mumudom and who will be able free us,we are busy taking sides...Am keeping my options open till 2015 but one thing is for sure,PDP is not my option 4 now.

PDP is not an option for a majority of the people.however it is up to the opposition to provide credible candidates.it will be disastrous to get rid of PDP only to end up the worse for it

Fkforyou: Like it or not some people would still display their mumulity,2015 is not yet around we've started displaying our mumulity insteadily of keenly observin the politics of dis our mumudom and who will be able free us,we are busy taking sides...Am keeping my options open till 2015 but one thing is for sure,PDP is not my option 4 now.

Those who will be displaying their mumuism in 2015 are the religion and ethnic zealots we have in our midst. Although they are the loudest, they are still in the minority when you compare them to silent majority.

2015 is it for me. If we don't get it right in 2015, we will never get it right again.


Front page please.

payless:

Those who will be displaying their mumuism in 2015 are the religion and ethnic zealots we have in our midst. Although they are the loudest, they are still in the minority when you compare them to silent majority.

2015 is it for me. If we don't get it right in 2015, we will never get it right again.


Front page please.

there has never been a time when nigerians and especially the youth have been so concerned about what goes on in government.people are now more enligtened and the atmosphere is perfect for change.zimbabwe missed its chance at the 2009 elections and within 4years,mugabe had figured out a way to send MDC packing.kenya missed its chance in 2007 when they couldnt decide which side to stay on.they ended up with kibaki and odinga squabbling for superiority till the kenyatta clan sent them both packing.Nigeria must not miss its chance.2015 is the time to turn around our fortunes for good and we should grab that opportunity while putting aside ethnoreligious sentiments

why focus on one clueless mumu when what we should really be doing is focusing on 150+ million blissfully ignorant, highly impoverished mumus

People are now awake, the image of 2015 started to clear the atmosphere.....!

lagerwhenindoubt: why focus on one clueless mumu when what we should really be doing is focusing on 150+ million blissfully ignorant, highly impoverished mumus

the 150+million blissful mumus are the focus of the article.they are the ones who have finally awoken from their slumber and have realised that 2015 represents the change they need

This essay brought tears to my eyes...and anger to my heart...and shame to my conscience

Coming from a ridiculously impoverished background growing up, I know that most people with similar stories would sell their souls to the politicians as long as they managed to get crumbs off the looting table...I would...

When you have nothing, your first allegiance is to your belly, because you have nothing to lose and immediate gratification to gain....Sadly these politicians know it and exploit it...

jackbauersballs: This essay brought tears to my eyes...and anger to my heart...and shame to my conscience

Coming from a ridiculously impoverished background growing up, I know that most people with similar stories would sell their souls to the politicians as long as they managed to get crumbs off the looting table...I would...

When you have nothing, your first allegiance is to your belly, because you have nothing to lose and immediate gratification to gain....Sadly these politicians know it and exploit it...

true words