SEATTLE (The Borowitz Report)—Jeff Bezos, the founder of Amazon.com, told reporters today that his reported purchase of the Washington Post was a “gigantic mix-up,” explaining that he had clicked on the newspaper by mistake.

“I guess I was just kind of browsing through their website and not paying close attention to what I was doing,” he said. “No way did I intend to buy anything.”

Mr. Bezos said he had been oblivious to his online shopping error until earlier today, when he saw an unusual charge for two hundred and fifty million dollars on his American Express statement.

After investigating with the credit-card company, he was informed that he had been charged for the purchase price of the entire Washington Post, which, he said, was “pure craziness.”

“No way in hell would I buy the Washington Post,” he said. “I don’t even read the Washington Post.”

Mr. Bezos said he had been on the phone with the Post’s customer service for the better part of the day trying to unwind his mistaken purchase, but so far “they’ve really been giving me the runaround.”

According to Mr. Bezos, “I keep telling them, I don’t know how it got in my cart. I don’t want it. It’s like they’re making it impossible to return it.


Source

Could this get so serious

LMFAO!
BUT SERIOUSLY THOUGH, I HAVE A DIFFERENT STORY HERE.




The big news in newspapers — that Jeffrey P. Bezos is buying The Washington Post — was not even 24 hours old when shock and wisecracks about the unexpected $250 million deal began to give way to acceptance and even envy.
What, many are asking, does Mr. Bezos, the billionaire founder and chief executive of Amazon.com, see in a 135-year-old newspaper that others do not?

If Mr. Bezos’s business history is any indication, don’t expect a quick answer and don’t expect any short-term fixes for The Post, which has suffered from years of sliding revenue and circulation. While terms like disrupter and innovator are often used to describe Mr. Bezos in his years at Amazon, he has also proved to be a long-term thinker, someone willing to buck Wall Street demands for big profits in order to invest in his company’s growth.

Now that he is the private owner of The Post, it would not be surprising to see him worry little about turning a quick profit and instead push to upend the often ossified world of newspaper publishing, just as he did with books more than a decade ago.

Indeed, Mr. Bezos, who declined a request for an interview, hinted in a letter to employees that he felt a “need to invent, which means we will need to experiment,” and that “there will, of course, be change at The Post over the coming years.”

But just what those experiments will be is anyone’s guess.

“Jeff Bezos doesn’t need The Washington Post to make money tomorrow or even in five years,” said Glenn Kelman, the founder and chief executive of Redfin, a real estate site that, like Amazon, is based in Seattle. “He’s proven that he’s able to think over a geological time scale.”

READ MORE:rEhttp://www.nytimes.com/2013/08/07/business/bezos-brings-promise-of-innovation-to-washington-post.html?smid=fb-share&_r=0


I think we should start saying Goodbye to print media.

I think we should start saying Goodbye to print media.

seriously

$250m from one card, how far can that card go? Na wa.

dr-pips:


seriously

Yeah! That's what Kindle hopes to do.

Social media news feeds too.