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Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 10:21pm On Aug 11, 2013
Kanwulia: I really do not like unnecessary fraternization with idle in-laws! kiss ESPECIALLY IN MY HOME!!!

How does it get to the stage of sleeping ON A MATRIMONIAL bed? undecided

My darling husband knows better ke! I WILL MOVE OUT!!! kiss

Never to return!!!! kiss Asssshawo work dey hungry me sef! I don get my chance be dat!!!!
grin you are just a clown grin
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 10:29pm On Aug 11, 2013
lorretta u: oh no you didn't say that cry
Hahahaha!!!
Lorre lorrre, Kanwulia's statement shocked u? Look at ur face!
U pple will not kill me here!
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 10:30pm On Aug 11, 2013
coogar:

did you people not think this through before letting him stay with you guys? where else can he sleep during the day if not the only bed in the house?

in the ideal world, newlyweds staying in a one bedroom apartment shouldn't have let a 3rd party stay around. try and earn more salary so you can afford a 3-bedroom house with a BQ for guests like your brother in law.

learn to be tolerant. grin
a couples house is not the same as a hotel or a hostel where any body can jusy do as he likes.its a couples house for goodness sakes so if he has sense,he should be sensitive.on a serious note,if i were in the shoes of the op,i wouldnt do any talking.my eyes and unfriendly body gestures will do the talking,he will start feeling uncomfortable that he himself will leave the house.what useless tolerance is that.does he not have bachelors like himself he can go and squat with.why must he be a liability in another persons home.God help him if i had a bad day at work and i am just coming out of the sun and i catch him.i will first wake him up with a resounding abara and tongue lashing.when i make the whole at,osphere unlivable for him,his elder bro will be begging him to stay and he will say he cant,he has another alternative and i will be eyeing him from behind.





Tolerance ko,tolulope ni.mshewwww

1 Like

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 10:33pm On Aug 11, 2013
Op please so not listen to those condemning you for bringing the issue here. You are the one wearing the shoe and you sure know where it pinches.
I personally will recommend two things for you, wisdom and patience. Your brother in law obviously sees you as his family that is why he is that free with you as to feel comfortable on the only bed in the house.
Have you had to spend a week sleeping on a couch before? What if you humiliate him today and he gets a good job tomoro, moves into his own apartment? you know that your conscience will tell you that you failed to tolerate him too when things were hard?
And stop this unnecessary sensationalism, matrimonial bed. It is just a bed and what makes it matrimonial is when you and ur hubby sleep on it .
Assuming you both decide to get another bed tomoro are you going to still be this worked up on who sleeps on it?
Learn to sacrifice especially when family is involved.

8 Likes

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by mesther96(f): 10:33pm On Aug 11, 2013
hmmm,im learningsmiley
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 10:36pm On Aug 11, 2013
Well said Guitarlife. That is one of life's realities.
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 10:42pm On Aug 11, 2013
acidosis™:


Holy Moses shocked, I need to shine my eyes well before mounting that altar shocked
grin

1 Like

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by coogar: 10:45pm On Aug 11, 2013
kulyie: a couples house is not the same as a hotel or a hostel where any body can jusy do as he likes.its a couples house for goodness sakes so if he has sense,he should be sensitive.on a serious note,if i were in the shoes of the op,i wouldnt do any talking.my eyes and unfriendly body gestures will do the talking,he will start feeling uncomfortable that he himself will leave the house.

this is just hot air from 2 wide nostrils.
when you accepted to house this fresh graduate, where exactly were you expecting him to catch a nap? on the couch? women who don't think things through and then scream for help are the worst type of humans ever.....in my opinion, it's the genesis of irresponsibility!



what useless tolerance is that.does he not have bachelors like himself he can go and squat with.why must he be a liability in another persons home.God help him if i had a bad day at work and i am just coming out of the sun and i catch him.i will first wake him up with a resounding abara and tongue lashing.when i make the whole at,osphere unlivable for him,his elder bro will be begging him to stay and he will say he cant,he has another alternative and i will be eyeing him from behind.

i doubt this OP would complain if it was her own sibling she caught lying in her bed. you would hit a man in his sleep? lololol - you would get beaten up under your own roof with the blessing of your husband!



Tolerance ko,tolulope ni.mshewwww

you have issues you need to sort out....

2 Likes

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by EfemenaXY: 10:47pm On Aug 11, 2013
yellowpawpaw: Well said Guitarlife. That is one of life's realities.

You still haven't answered my question about how the couple will cope with an adult male member in a bedsit / one room apartment, with just one bed.

Afterall, na you mention that real-life scenario.

~ How dem go do the sleeping arrangement?

~ How do they get their freak on at night? Or early in the morning when testosterone levels are high?
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 10:55pm On Aug 11, 2013
coogar:

this is just hot air from 2 wide nostrils.
when you accepted to house this fresh graduate, where exactly were you expecting him to catch a nap? on the couch? women who don't think things through and then scream for help are the worst type of humans ever.....in my opinion, it's the genesis of irresponsibility!




i doubt this OP would complain if it was her own sibling she caught lying in her bed. you would hit a man in his sleep? lololol - you would get beaten up under your own roof with the blessing of your husband!




you have issues you need to sort out....
honestly i loathe the way you reason at times.cant he sleep on the chair in the sitting room.why must he sleep in a couples matrimonial bed.what kind of nonsense is that.so because the couple allowed him in,he should now behave anyhow,no sense of self respect and decorum.



By the way he appears to be a lazy man.how can a graduate be sleeping,when he is supposed to have hit the street,going to companies and checking vacancies.i suppose chevron employer will wake him up from his sleep amd give him a job and you are there preaching tolerance when you are housing a lazy bone
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 10:55pm On Aug 11, 2013
coogar:

this is just hot air from 2 wide nostrils.
when you accepted to house this fresh graduate, where exactly were you expecting him to catch a nap? on the couch? women who don't think things through and then scream for help are the worst type of humans ever.....in my opinion, it's the genesis of irresponsibility!




i doubt this OP would complain if it was her own sibling she caught lying in her bed. you would hit a man in his sleep? lololol - you would get beaten up under your own roof with the blessing of your husband!




you have issues you need to sort out....
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Maipride(f): 10:58pm On Aug 11, 2013
kulyie: a couples house is not the same as a hotel or a hostel where any body can jusy do as he likes.its a couples house for goodness sakes so if he has sense,he should be sensitive.on a serious note,if i were in the shoes of the op,i wouldnt do any talking.my eyes and unfriendly body gestures will do the talking,he will start feeling uncomfortable that he himself will leave the house.what useless tolerance is that.does he not have bachelors like himself he can go and squat with.why must he be a liability in another persons home.God help him if i had a bad day at work and i am just coming out of the sun and i catch him.i will first wake him up with a resounding abara and tongue lashing.when i make the whole at,osphere unlivable for him,his elder bro will be begging him to stay and he will say he cant,he has another alternative and i will be eyeing him from behind.





Tolerance ko,tolulope ni.mshewwww

Honestly speaking,you need to take a chill pill sis...
Nothing last forever.

4 Likes

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by coogar: 11:05pm On Aug 11, 2013
kulyie: honestly i loathe the way you reason at times.cant he sleep on the chair in the sitting room.why must he sleep in a couples matrimonial bed.what kind of nonsense is that.so because the couple allowed him in,he should now behave anyhow,no sense of self respect and decorum.

who sleeps on the couch in the afternoon? the husband was at home when his brother was sleeping in the bedroom. can you not see he must have taken permission from the husband before going to the bedroom? it's even possible he was sleeping in the living before the OP's hubby asked him to go to the bedroom and sleep.


By the way he appears to be a lazy man.how can a graduate be sleeping,when he is supposed to have hit the street,going to companies and checking vacancies.i suppose chevron employer will wake him up from his sleep amd give him a job and you are there preaching tolerance when you are housing a lazy bone

he's a fresh graduate - he doesn't even have a certificate yet to pursue any employment. the OP should calm down
and learn to be tolerant....
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 11:15pm On Aug 11, 2013
coogar:

who sleeps on the couch in the afternoon? the husband was at home when his brother was sleeping in the bedroom. can you not see he must have taken permission from the husband before going to the bedroom? it's even possible he was sleeping in the living before the OP's hubby asked him to go to the bedroom and sleep.



he's a fresh graduate - he doesn't even have a certificate yet to pursue any employment. the OP should calm down
and learn to be tolerant....
its a lie joor.dont give me cok and bull story,ok,if the man allowed him into the bedroom to sleep (which i dont believe) wouldnt he have told the wife that my bro is sleeping in the room o,so she wouldnt be given a rude shock.e.g entering the room without noticing the bed,taking off your clothes and decide to turn around,lo and behold you see your inlaw fast asleep while you are naked,wont you cover yourself and scream.anyway i dont believe that.






Secondly a fresh draduate may not have been given his certificate but the school will have given him a formal official document (to whom it may concern) pending the time he gets his certificate,therefore a man that is not a lazy bone that yoruba call indomie hands,should hit the street and look for job instead of sleeping like a pregnant woman in the afternoon for that matter,not night o shocked

1 Like

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 11:20pm On Aug 11, 2013
Efemena_xy:

You still haven't answered my question about how the couple will cope with an adult male member in a bedsit / one room apartment, with just one bed.

Afterall, na you mention that real-life scenario.

~ How dem go do the sleeping arrangement?

~ How do they get their freak on at night? Or early in the morning when testosterone levels are high?
With due respect ma'am, this ain't no movie script. I understand It is quite a disturbing scenario for you to fathom but these are the times we live in. Love makes 30 people sleep together in a room and conveniently too. I live in the projects so It ain't no biggie. You could come around sometime.
The wife should show great wisdom and patience here she would have won the brother in law to her side for life.
In life 1+2 is not always equal to 3.

1 Like

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by coogar: 11:22pm On Aug 11, 2013
kulyie: its a lie joor.dont give me cok and bull story,ok,if the man allowed him into the bedroom to sleep (which i dont believe) wouldnt he have told the wife that my bro is sleeping in the room o,so she wouldnt be given a rude shock.e.g entering the room without noticing the bed,taking off your clothes and decide to turn around,lo and behold you see your inlaw fast asleep while you are naked,wont you cover yourself and scream.anyway i dont believe that.

you don't believe it? in a one bedroom apartment, where else can the brother be if he's not in the living room with the husband? are you saying the husband wasn't aware the brother was in the bedroom before the wife came in? sometimes, you argue just for the sake of it....


Secondly a fresh draduate may not have been given his certificate but the school will have given him a formal official document (to whom it may concern) pending the time he gets his certificate,therefore a man that is not a lazy bone that yoruba call indomie hands,should hit the street and look for job instead of sleeping like a pregnant woman in the afternoon for that matter,not night o shocked

how do you know he's not done all that before noon? you sit on a plastic armchair to cast aspersions at someone you don't even know. if we do a thorough investigation, you spent 4 years at home as a graduate before getting your job. were you a pregnant cow then?

3 Likes

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 11:27pm On Aug 11, 2013
coogar:

you don't believe it? in a one bedroom apartment, where else can the brother be if he's not in the living room with the husband? are you saying the husband wasn't aware the brother was before the wife came in? sometimes, you argue just for the sake of it....



how do you know he's not done all that before noon? you sit on a plastic armchair to cast aspersions at someone you don't even know. if we do a thorough investigation, you spent 4 years at home as a graduate before getting your job. were you a pregnant cow then?
your case isa ireedemable.you can never know anything again.......next please
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 11:29pm On Aug 11, 2013
Dis kulyie wey dey blow hot air since, I'm pretty sure she no get job o.
@op, pls let the dude be. What's in a bed? You said yourself that he sleeps in the sitting room at night, so probably you only 'caught' him on your 'matrimonial bed' the one time. But of course that one time is all you need to make a big deal, enough to force him out of your apartment, kinda like maximising an opening lol. Women.
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by EfemenaXY: 11:31pm On Aug 11, 2013
Guitarlife: With due respect ma'am, this ain't no movie script. I understand It is quite a disturbing scenario for you to fathom but these are the times we live in. Love makes 30 people sleep together in a room and conveniently too. I live in the projects so It ain't no biggie. You could come around sometime.
The wife should show great wisdom and patience here she would have won the brother in law to her side for life.
In life 1+2 is not always equal to 3.

With all due respect sir, my question wasn't directed at you, and neither has your vague, sentimental, responses addressed or even answered any of my very specific questions, let alone one of them.

If you feel the need to quote and respond to my post, the least you can do is give me realistic, real-life answers.
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by coogar: 11:35pm On Aug 11, 2013
kulyie: your case isa ireedemable.you can never know anything again.......next please

you need blood tonic - your blood sugar must be very low. grin

BoboYekini: Dis kulyie wey dey blow hot air since, I'm pretty sure she no get job o.

kulyie is an aspiring nollywood actress - she's not been called for any auditioning in 3 years. all she does is eat yam and watch daytime TV all day.
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 11:42pm On Aug 11, 2013
Efemena_xy:

With all due respect sir, my question wasn't directed at you, and neither has your vague, sentimental, responses addressed or even answered any of my very specific questions, let alone one of them.

If you feel the need to quote and respond to my post, the least you can do is give me realistic, real-life answers.
Exactly why I offered to take you on an excursion through the projects so you could see with your own two naked eyes ma'am.

1 Like

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Daresh(f): 12:06am On Aug 12, 2013
Abeg yellowpawpaw I don't know what you are saying but the guy should not be lying in her bed. Consider this situation, wife comes home from work a little sleepy and jumps into bed with her "husband". Give him a kiss and a hug and maybe even starts to get busy with a sleepy "husband" only to find it isn't husband but brother in law. Ol boi that shit ain't gonna be funny for months mean!
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 1:09am On Aug 12, 2013
Its seems that most of us grow up in a porshe house,where everyone is entitled to one room each.
Fastforward to marriage,the same thing abounds so we think all other pple r like that.
Some of us should take a trip to some areas in our big cities like diobu,mararaba,odakpu,agege,zuba and all the settlements in nigeria.
Just a day,then u can come and give ur answer or view.

Madam Efe, however they choose to sleep,I don't wanna know but in such houses u can c the relations living with them. Its still in d same house they procreate.
How they do it,I don't know but when UN said that more than 70% of Nigerians live below two dollars a day with a population of more than 150 million,pls help me do the calculation.


Take this topic to front page,u will get the response u r lookin for.some will tell u they r d product of what I've been tryin to explain since.

2 Likes

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 1:11am On Aug 12, 2013
Daresh: Abeg yellowpawpaw I don't know what you are saying but the guy should not be lying in her bed. Consider this situation, wife comes home from work a little sleepy and jumps into bed with her "husband". Give him a kiss and a hug and maybe even starts to get busy with a sleepy "husband" only to find it isn't husband but brother in law. Ol boi that shit ain't gonna be funny for months mean!
What r u saying? Didn't get u.
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by dayokanu(m): 4:30am On Aug 12, 2013
I dont understand why some people make a big issue out of everything

Ok They have a Parlour and a bedroom, The guy was sleeping on the couch and his brother advised it wasnt right to sleep on the couch. Who would want guests to come into the parlour and meet someone sleeping on the couch?

So what option is left? No be the bedroom? Or where else?

And whats matrimonial bed? This is Nigeria where people are poor and share thing. Some people share bathroom and toilet with as many as 30 other people. We have seen couples who live in another persons living room so where is there own matrimonial bed?

And some telling him to go find a job, Is it 24hrs that he would be on the road? abi no be Naija we dey?

And the thought about wife coming in and stripping and kissing someone? Shey na movie dem dey act? WHo strips nakeed in a house you share with someone else without checking your environment

3 Likes

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 5:27am On Aug 12, 2013
BoboYekini: Dis kulyie wey dey blow hot air since, I'm pretty sure she no get job o.
@op, pls let the dude be. What's in a bed? You said yourself that he sleeps in the sitting room at night, so probably you only 'caught' him on your 'matrimonial bed' the one time. But of course that one time is all you need to make a big deal, enough to force him out of your apartment, kinda like maximising an opening lol. Women.
smh.mshewwwww so you expect me to go to work on a sunday night.abeg use your number 6 n desist from presumption
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by biolabee(m): 5:31am On Aug 12, 2013
One good thing about nl... you learn other's perspectives
Some came from modest backgrounds like the op...
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 5:37am On Aug 12, 2013
coogar:

you need blood tonic - your blood sugar must be very low. grin



kulyie is an aspiring nollywood actress - she's not been called for any auditioning in 3 years. all she does is eat yam and watch daytime TV all day.
smh you must really live in my house to know that i am an aspiring nollywood actress and i eat yam and watch tv all day shocked its not only aspiring nollywood artist,you will soon see aspiring gollywood actress.you and all this your presumption ehen.smh.what a pity :/
Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 5:44am On Aug 12, 2013
Krisben4343: Please pals, your opinions are needed to guide me before I start creating unnecessary arguments with my husband's younger brother or his family.
My husbands younger brother who just graduated from the higher institution is now living with us searching for a job . But our house is just a seating room and a bedroom with toilet facility the type they call two room self contain in Lagos. Sometimes I close from work on getting home I see him sleeping on my bed, sometime my husband will be in the seating room watching movies and his younger brother will be sleeping on our bed. Is it right to allow him continue or to stop him considering the type of house we are living,? but at nigh the place he sleeps is the seating room while me and my husband sleep in our bedroom. Please your wise opinions will be appreciated. Thanks

I read all the responses and Coogar shockingly ,echoed my sentiments
What did you expect
The house has one bed
Your husband is in the living room watching TV andyour houseguest wants to take a nap
I assure you he didn't just go and climb on your bed like goldilocks,your husband permitted him
Do you want to bar your guests from taking naps?
you have 2 solutions

1. buy him a small mattress so that he can park it somewhere on the floor in that bedroom and sleep there when he wants to take his siesta which he is entitled to
or
2. you buy a second TV for the bedroom so your hubby can watch his shows in the bedroom


I am sure you use the same toilet and bath with him
His clothing must be in that bedroom too,I doubt if they are in the living room ( parlour) so he is already utilizing the bedroom too
I hope you are keeping down your moans at night,let the poor boys kini kan not explode when you and hubby will be getting it on. grin
Hope his stay is very temporary .

2 Likes

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 5:54am On Aug 12, 2013
babyosisi:

I read all the responses and Coogar echoed my sentiments
What did you expect
The house has one bed
Your husband is in the living room watching TV andyour houseguest wants to take a nap
I assure you he didn't just go and climb on your bed like goldilocks,your husband permitted him
Do you want to bar your guests from taking naps?
you have 2 solutions

1. buy him a small mattress so that he can park it somewhere on the floor in that bedroom and sleep there when he wants to take his siesta which he is entitled to
or
2. you buy a second TV for the bedroom so your hubby can watch his shows in the bedroom


I am sure you use the same toilet and bath with him
His clothing must be in that bedroom too,I doubt if they are in the living room ( parlour) so he is already utilizing the bedroom too
I hope you are keeping down your moans at night,let the poor boys kini kan not explode when you and hubby will be getting it on. grin
Hope his stay is very temporary .
;Dbabyosisi grin please its too early for this abeg cheesy o sharo monday grin

1 Like

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by prologue: 6:01am On Aug 12, 2013
babyosisi:

I read all the responses and Coogar shockingly ,echoed my sentiments
What did you expect
The house has one bed
Your husband is in the living room watching TV andyour houseguest wants to take a nap
I assure you he didn't just go and climb on your bed like goldilocks,your husband permitted him
Do you want to bar your guests from taking naps?
you have 2 solutions

1. buy him a small mattress so that he can park it somewhere on the floor in that bedroom and sleep there when he wants to take his siesta which he is entitled to
or
2. you buy a second TV for the bedroom so your hubby can watch his shows in the bedroom


I am sure you use the same toilet and bath with him
His clothing must be in that bedroom too,I doubt if they are in the living room ( parlour) so he is already utilizing the bedroom too
I hope you are keeping down your moans at night,let the poor boys kini kan not explode when you and hubby will be getting it on. grin
Hope his stay is very temporary .

Really smart talk... Thank you

1 Like

Re: Is It Right For My Brother In Law To Sleep On My Matrimonial Bed? by Nobody: 6:04am On Aug 12, 2013
cheesy cheesy cheesy.. Funny stuff.

Get the guy a pull out sofa or twin mattress ( no need for baseboard), good bedding + blanket and a dresser to keep his clothes in the living room , your guests will understand, keep the space tidy ( he's a guy) if you can.

it's just temporary, no condition is permanent. Amebos should shut their faces.

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