............... ............... ... My name is Chioma Odilinye. I was married to Mr. Onyebuchi Odilinye. The marriage is blessed with a son. My husband fell sick sometime last year and it demanded that he would be flown to Indian for an operation. He left to India in company of his immediate elder brother, Mr. Hyacinth Odilinye. I spoke with my husband in India and he told me d operation was successful, that they will be back in few days. I called again but nobody was picking my calls and after other trials, I discovered d number has been unavailable. I was forced to try my husband's Nigeria number which went through and I spoke with his elder brother, Hyacinth who told me that they are back from India and are now in a referal hospital in Abuja. I asked to speak to my husband but he wouldn't allow me on d reason dat he was so weak to talk. I demanded d address of d hospital in Abuja, but he wouldn't give me. This went on for weeks. # During this period, my husband's younger brothers(Emenik e and Chukwujekwu) sent an urgent message that all our seven haulage trucks have been grounded by police and the only condition to release them was to provide the original documents of the trucks. I obliged them with d documents. Little did I know that my husband had died and they were using that as a ploy to collect all our properties. Even our Highland SUV that was used to convey my husband to d airport has not been returned. After the burial and funeral of my husband, Mr. Hyacinth Odilinye with sisters in the village at Ogidi in Anambra State, locked me, my mum and my son up in a room that the only condition to our release was upon handing over of the documents of the house I and my late husband suffered to build in Lagos. It took d intervention of some villagers for them to release us, but their sister Ebere followed us back to Lagos to collect d document. We got to Lagos and I made it clear to Ebere that the house belongs to I and husband and I can't give her d documents. This irked her and she threatened me that they will ensure that I suffer with my son. Few hours later, the elder brother Hyacinth called and also threatened to kill me if I don't provide the documents. On several occasions lately, two people on a motorcycle would come at my gate, release one or two gunshots and speed off. I implore you to use ur good office to recover my properties and also save my life which is in danger.
Culled from Hope For Nigeria

She can sue the family in court and also ask for protective custody against the family members seeing her life is in danger and under threat.


This is what happens when a man runs a weak structure in his immediate family allowing intrusion of the extended family in his matters. I know of a woman whose husband's family came to chase her and the children out of the home same week the man died. It took the intervention of the residents on that street and the husband's employer to prevent the eviction.

We live in a terrible and difficult time.... The heart of a man is desperately wicked

Jehovah, this is so painful!!!. They don't even care about their late brother's son.

Chioma Odilinye, the young widow from Asaba but married to the late Onyebuchi Odilinye from Ogidi in Idemili Local Govt Area.

Dear God...

chaircover:

In the first instance, how was it the brothers following him to India? What is the wifes duty? Where was she when her husband was going to India without her. How did she become relegated to the background as a glorified baby maker/house help while the mans extended family became his right hand people.

How did the family know the brothers business activities. How are they in control of the trucks in the first instance? Where were the trucks parked?

Aunty CC,
I have to post this story here for women to learn and more especially for men(Igbo) to have a glimpse of what could happen to thier family if they join their ancestors.
My late Dad was one of such men that loves his family (brothers & half-brothers) to a fault. And he believes that they also love him so much. In fact he made sure that I see my cousins as my own siblings.
But when he died, my uncles wanted to share his property and leave my mum and us the children with little or nothing. But thank God that their plans failed.
Today, they want us to see them as our "loving" Uncles who have our best interest at heart. Abeg No Time.

God knows,before i get married there would be pre nupital agreement,including this case....wo i got no time struggling with inlaws,where were they when we struggled,ah i advice she takes this to court,you will certainly win the case kpele

Ma'am,am so sorry 4 ur plight. Pls,leave d environment and sell d house and buy a better one. Or better still relocate buh SELL D HOUSE.

MGBEKELAND na waya!
Her husband must come from a wretched home for sure!
No need to fight such SOCIO-ECONOMIC vampires/vultures!

WOMEN! WORK AND STOP DEPENDING ON HUSBAND THIS AND HUSBAND THAT!

Nor be her mate be AMBASSADOR TO SPAIN?

Mtcheeeeeew!!!!!

I don't blame them!
How many families have seen an SUV or TRUCK from that part of Nigeria?

Poverty-Stricken Wretches!
After spending DECADES pushin' BARROWS all over Lagos, then DEPORTED FROM LAGOS, these OKONGWUS AND MGBEKES will sit and wait to collect OR KILL for what they did not sweat for.

Vermin!

What do u expect. Its this same nl that guys said that their next of kin is their brothers bla bla bla.
It is this same nl that some guys said they prefer to trust their bros and co than their bette half.

This poo wouldn't hv occured had the man valued and respected his wife. And the wife in present day Naija still believed that all she came into d world to do is procreate and answer her husband sir.
Nansense.
As u make ur bed,u lie on it.

Na wa o!

What a story. I've also heard of such too - instances where the deceased man's family storm in, lock up the wife and kids whilst they 'share out' his property.

What I honestly don't get is this: The woman's kids, do they not bear their father's name? And if so, shouldn't the man's family see those kids as part of them?

And to those 'sharing' off his property - for what purpose other than greed? Do the brothers and sisters committing that atrocity not have their own matrimonial homes? How can they go to bed at night and sleep comfortably knowing the life of utter hopelessness and destitution their actions will bring upon their late brother's family? Let's put the wife aside. What about his kids? Their nieces and nephews? Do they not matter?

I thought these kinda things have long stopped happening especially with educated,enlightened and exposed women..

Efemena_xy:
Na wa o!

What I honestly don't get is this: The woman's kids, do they not bear their father's name? And if so, shouldn't the man's family see those kids as part of them?

Let's put the wife aside. What about his kids? Their nieces and nephews? Do they not matter?

Efe,
what you need to understand is that greed can make a lot of wo/men become myopic. It makes them not to look beyond the here and now. It will surprise you that, tomorrow these wo/men will even want to claim the success of those children they left to suffer and even try to bias the children's mind against their mother (it happened in our case).
Women should try and secure their future and that of their children, while the man is still alive. If the man won't invest in the wife's name, he should at least invest in the children's name. A man making his brother next of kin, or telling him all about his business is just being foolish.
This kind of stories abound where I come from and there is no abolishment of this kind of tradition or practice anytime soon.

When we advise young couples to set up life insurance naming their children as beneficiaries, nobody listens!
When we say as businessmen set up a company use your family as shareholders and directors, then buy all property and assets in the company Name, Nobody listens!
When we say use small change(7 haulage truck no be small change) and write a will/ do basic estate planning, nobody listens!
They say wetin Lawyers dey do sef!
Its a shame that most spouses do not inquire about cultural estate succession plans in their husbands community before marriage and if his family believe in such!
Well since she said all properties where in their joint Names, she can sue the greedy family to recover it! But her life will be in more danger(did I hear gunshots) and also cousins will never see eye to eye again(Bianca and Ojukwu's children are in court, Bianca and ojukwu's brothers are in court)
Plan wisely for your demise.

this is a consequence of mistrust between man n wife

the man entrusts his affairs to his family who also are unfaithful in his absence

tragic

there is little the woman can do if she has this kind of husband aside work and maybe nag or cajole to be involved

even that can backfire as the hubby will think she has an ulterior motive

Efemena_xy: Na wa o!

What a story. I've also heard of such too - instances where the deceased man's family storm in, lock up the wife and kids whilst they 'share out' his property.

What I honestly don't get is this: The woman's kids, do they not bear their father's name? And if so, shouldn't the man's family see those kids as part of them?

And to those 'sharing' off his property - for what purpose other than greed? Do the brothers and sisters committing that atrocity not have their own matrimonial homes? How can they go to bed at night and sleep comfortably knowing the life of utter hopelessness and destitution their actions will bring upon their late brother's family? Let's put the wife aside. What about his kids? Their nieces and nephews? Do they not matter?

Go to igboland,u will bow. Were I lived during my undergrad yrs,they hd a son(lived in one of those African countries)who just got married. While still honeymooin, the guy died from an accident.
Wife just took in.
Do u know that while mourning her husband in the family house, the same family people went to their flat(hubby rented a flat for her) and cleared everything inside leaving only broom and one kerchief(headtie)?
This was a guy that set up everybody in the family. The poor lady after mournin went back to her father's house.
Heard them arguing later that they didn't know she was pregnant and guess what she gave birth to a boy but I did not set my eyes on her again till I left that place.
Igbo people hv a very very myopic attitude towards wives irrespective of class.
Greed is their undoing.
It took one agrressive woman from my town to stop that rubbish when her husband died leaving her with 3 children and no will.
While mournin,family members were already fighting over her hubby's assets and landed ppty. As soon as she can walk around,she flooded the town with army people(courtesy of her cousin) and locked everybody both MIL. C adults hiding like small children.
It was at that stage that the kinsmen(elders) started begging her to stop,they will settle it.
Not only did she acquire her hubbys ppty back,she made them sign a writn agreement of no interferance else..
Her step empowered women especially widows and b4 u know it, a decree was passed. Let no man ever harrase a widow again in any form. Today, such things r non existing.

good move by the woman,,, yellow

i hoe she sef no go become terror if it happens that her own pikin marries anoda woman

What a woman! Your husband had done all he can for you and you allow fear to take over you.

Your husband died and. It was his brothers that knew before you. Ok


You released documents of trucks and property your husband left with you to them too.

Oh my!


Go get a lawyer, get some army Men, ( not even police), and deal with those guys and make sure they sign a document stating if any thing happens to you or your family, they will sure answer for it.

They will be some the ones protecting you because their life is also in danger.

Ppl dey suffer Sha.

Walai I have this kind of brother in law, na bori camp dem go sleep for the rest of their lives.what a greedy set of family.

You should know even if they signed a pre-nup, this will still happen. Nigerian society is aggressive so most times you have to be aggressive before something works for you.


Woman, go get some army guys, go to bori-camp or any Army barrack(yes, it's not legal but this way will get 99% result) get those guys and recover your husbands property. Even if it means you giving them one of the trucks...do it.

Take it to court, the lawyers go siddon for your matter until your BIL sells off everything.

No be Nigeria again!





Hah

chaircover:



Its not as if its a new thing and they know the types of families that they are married into, so they should be prepared.

Madam CC,
I bet you most times the woman is so 'loved and adored' while the hubby is alive. It is only at his demise that they will bare their fangs.
(This tradition is not really a tradition in my own village, but some greedy people wanted to introduce it.)
My parents brought us up to share with our cousins (as in we even eat from the same plate, wear the same clothes) but when my dad died, the same cousins and uncles started treating us as if we were lepers. Thank God that my mum and my sister were educated while they illiterates. In their presence landed documents and other important papers were removed from the house. And one of my uncles intervened knowing that the same could be meted out to his family if he dies (cos he has only girls).

biolabee: good move by the woman,,, yellow

i hoe she sef no go become terror if it happens that her own pikin marries anoda woman

It won't ever happen again. Its in the town's constitution.
U can do any other thing but u can't touch ur late bro's ppty both wife and assets.

chaircover: YPP then if this is the case, then this is the more reason why these women should not sleep or slumber and eat with all 10 fingers and not get carried away be gele and gucci. They should get something doing in their own names and they should get their husbands to invest in his children.

Its not as if its a new thing and they know the types of families that they are married into, so they should be prepared.

I know that no one likes talking about death and wills but it is fact that one needs to address. The moment people start having children, a will & life insurance need to be in place.

I read about the death of one Eze ndi igbo in lagos that died from awka and what they did to the wife.
A very wealthy and influential man but after his death, the wife was stripped of everyhing.
Yeyecious custom.

I blame women. They will never learn and be wise.
Tomoro another one will start lamenting again.
And these men that encourage this......elders in d church.
Marriage is more than I love u darling. Shine ur eyes wellu wellu

slimyem: I thought these kinda things have long stopped happening especially with educated,enlightened and exposed women..

You thought wrong... the earlier you ladies brag/talk less and take practical steps to secure yourselves in this world, the better for you. Women are still very vulnerable on several fronts, the best way to help yourselves is to admit that you have certain things that do not favour you and work to mitigate them instead of playing "Wonder Woman" especially on the Internet.

I am just surprised the woman seems to have nobody to talk to. Doesnt she have a family or even friends. Well lots of good posts already and people can learn from this story. First of all, women should watch the kind of families they marry into. If possible avoid families where the man has brothers and siters who have nothing doing. They will drag your husband down and create things like this. Who knows whether they killed him sef. Also woman should get interested in what their husband is doing? In this case she was just a home-maker and now she is suffering for it. Also, try have friends, colleagues and people you can talk to. Get something doing so that you can meet other people and exchange ideas.

And men please lets put our houses in order. Any man above 40 should have a "living Will". It is compulsory. Life Insurance is also necessary these days. You need to clearly identify your wife/children as next of kin not some brother or sister. Your brother or sister will take care of their own children first before your own so your wife/kids must be next of kin on all official documents. Infact guys, when you register companies, make your wife a part owner even if she is not involved, make her a director with shares so that her name also features as part owner.

Very unfortunate story, so sad such still happen.

This is one thing I hate about the Igbo culture, why must a widow be subjected to such barbaric and inhumane tradition?, Whenever I hear such a news I just feel too sad.. I remember when my neighbour was killed (he was Yoruba) his kinsmen contributed to the education of his children up to university level, at least they understood that things will not be the same for the wife as it was when the husband was alive.. Where I'm from we don't practice such.. Greedy inlaws.. Useless custom

nbright:
This is one thing I hate about the Igbo culture, why must a widow be subjected to such barbaric and inhumane tradition?,

It's not Igbo culture, because it is not practised in all Igbo villages. It is mainly the culture of those who practice "ila n' ikwu nne". Espessialy people of Old bende....."ndi ogbo"

yellowpawpaw:
It won't ever happen again. Its in the town's constitution.
U can do any other thing but u can't touch ur late bro's ppty both wife and assets.

excellent...

lol @ the uncle who did the right thing cos he has girls only...

One has to be really careful when it comes to culture. What i heard, i dont know how true is that the first son is kind of like a custodian to family property in Igboland. Now, it is very essential for a woman to seek out the best interest of her and her kids. The thing of it is, family may be thinking their brother used their father's money to acquire all these so they are entitled to an equal share. You just have to understand the culture before you marry and protect yourself and kids. Let the man do things for you in your name apart from his, especially if he is the first son. Same thing Ojukwu's wife is facing. He took over all his father's properties and was most likely taking care of his siblings from it. That kind of property, the siblings will never let it go.

Hmm Na wa oo

So sad.