Watching Mike Ozokhome on Channels TV, with his disheveled appearance and desperate mien, I began to wonder what those kidnappers may have done to him and may still be doing.

As he addressed the press, I was struck by the urgency in his voice and the way his eyes shone and darted about like those of a frightened and trapped rat. He read with a fit of violent mental excitement, as if someone wrote that speech for him, perhaps before releasing him and maybe threatened to pick him up again if he fell short in that delivery.

We would never know why the kidnappers choose him. Maybe he was just one unfortunate random pick. We all are in jeopardy after all. Maybe they still hoped he'll release some of those dollars his client, Farouk Lawan allegedly stuffed in his cap. Maybe they were trying to send a clear message that all those who defended our thieving politicians, obtaining all sorts of injunctions that clogged the wheel of justice would be held responsible for the decay in our polity and the attendant poverty and unemployment. The only way to find out would be to ask the Kidnappers and I am not about to volunteer.

Mike Ozokhome looked terrible but when he began to advocate amnesty for kidnappers, his appearance paled in comparison. By the time I was done listening to him, all I could think about was AMNESTY.

When I got to the National hospital for my baby's immunization, the man at the cash point was so uncourteous to all who would not leave their change with him. By the time I left him, I was thinking....perhaps he needs amnesty. On my way back, there was so much chaos at one of the busy roundabouts while some policemen stood idly by. I thought....perhaps they need amnesty. Two men who had bumped into each other's cars were shouting at each other. I just glanced in their direction and thought.....maybe they need amnesty. My son kept crying, distracting me as I drove, insisting I held him and I finally screamed 'do you need amnesty?' when I did that, I paused to wonder if I was also going crazy. Maybe I need amnesty.

Amnesty here we come. Armed robbers, terrorists, kidnappers, corrupt politicians, drug peddlers, corrupt policemen, bad teachers, bad parents, bad clergy, rapists, pedophiles......the list goes on. We are all competing for your attention.

- See more at: http://www.channelkoos.com/index.php/news/5254-amnesty-galore-a-satire-by-nneka-aroh#sthash.pKm7Kkr1.dpuf

Recommended to be read ONLY if you want to have a good laugh about the crossroad we have found ourselves in Nigeria.