1. "We want to thank the president for
bringing Facebook to Nigeria." - Information Minister, Labaran Maku.

2. "You press men, you always say there are no minerals in Kano. We have Coca-Cola, Fanta, Mirinda and the newly invented Sprite." -Barkin Zuwo

3. "Foreign investors should ignore Boko
Haram and invest in Nigeria." - GEJ

4. "I will water your school and fire your
school." - Orji Uzoh

5. "Nigerians, don't panic. Terrorist attack is everywhere ... maybe it is our turn." - GEJ

6. "I will rather kill myself than commit
suicide." - Dame Patience Jonathan

7. "I founded this school for the masses and the school fees is 850,000 naira." - Atiku

8. "Until I see someone eating out of the
gutters before I believe there is poverty in Nigeria." - Umaru Dikko

9. "Telephone is not meant for the poor. " -David Mark

10. "The worth of a child born and bred in Nigeria cannot be compared to that in the United States." - Yakubu Gowon

11. "School is not meant for the poor, only for the rich." - Ikedi Ohakim

12. "At 50, Britain is still battling with King Arthur and the knights of the round table so Nigeria is not doing too badly." - Diezeani Allison- Madueke

13. "Even Jesus Christ cannot conduct a free and fair election in Nigeria." Olusegun Obasanjo

14. "The corp members where
destined to die, nobody can run away from destiny." - Mallam Isa Yaguda, Governor, Bauchi State

15. "On behalf of 20 million naira, I'll donate my family" - Dame Patience Jonathan

16. "We, the PDP did not win
this election, I have gone to church to
confess, I gave them money and they called the result." - Chris Uba

17. "I want to commend the doctors and
nurses for responding to treatment." - DamePatience Jonathan

18. "I can see camera people. Are they going to televise us alive?" - Dame Patience Jonathan?

Aunty dame got me

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