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Ugly People Dating Site - Jokes Etc - Nairaland

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Ugly People Dating Site by Gabry(f): 3:43am On Sep 18, 2008
Welcome to the Ugly People Dating Service, a free dating service for those of us who aren't beauty queens or tall dark and handsome.

Have you been hit with the ugly stick? Do you have a face only a mother could love? Do your "friends" call you Fugly? Do little children run away screaming when you smile?

Then you've come to the right place. We're here to help you. Because ugly people need love, too!

Re: Ugly People Dating Site by blackspade(m): 3:44am On Sep 18, 2008
rotflmfao! grin grin grin
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Gabry(f): 3:48am On Sep 18, 2008
Member #1
NAME: My Wang

NICKNAME: Ho Chi Min

SEX: Female

AGE: 25

OCCUPATION: Self-employed massage therapist.
(I got a booth in the mall.)

ABOUT MYSELF: Me love you long time.

LIKES: Rice, noodles, chinese food.

DISLIKES: Racial stereotypes.

HOBBIES: Karate. Origami. Folding Kleenex tissues into elaborate contraptions.

LOOKING FOR:
A white guy. They’re so big, if you know what I mean. *wink* No asian guys, please. (Once you go white, you never go back.)

Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Gabry(f): 3:59am On Sep 18, 2008
Member #2
NAME: Ibkaye Spot
(I changed my last name in honor of my childhood dog)

NICKNAME: Veggy Hippie

SEX: Female

AGE: 30

OCCUPATION: Sales clerk in an organic health food store.

ABOUT MYSELF:
I’m a second level vegan. That means I only eat animals who don’t eat meat. I’m a member of PETA and Greenpeace (Save the whales!)

LIKES:
I love animals. I have 17 cats, 8 parakeets, 2 ferrets, and a three-legged, one-eyed, diabetic dog named Lucky.

DISLIKES: People.

HOBBIES:
Feeding my pets. (They’re my soulmates!) Burning down medical laboratories to save a hamster.

LOOKING FOR:
A man who will love me as much as I love my pets.

Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Gabry(f): 7:02am On Sep 18, 2008
Member #3



NAME: Manickal Krakakousky.

NICKNAME: My friends call me Shithead. (I think it’s because I scrub toilets for a living.)

SEX: Yes please. (Haha, that joke never gets old.)

AGE: 29

OCCUPATION: future Rock Star
(Currently working as “domestic engineer” aka janitor, but I practice every day on my Xbox 360.)

ABOUT MYSELF:
When I don’t mop floors, I will dig my booger and place it under my boss's table. At the end of the week, I would make a comparison on which booger is bigger.

LIKES:
Heavy Metal music, Metallica, Iron Maiden. Chicks with tattoos on their foreheads.

DISLIKES:
My mom washing my underwear. I can't help it, I just loveeee the smell of it when it is being kept for 2 weeks in a row. Thats what I call the natural scent of goodness.

HOBBIES: Headbanging, moshpitting.

LOOKING FOR:
Some chick with big boobs and a tattoo on her forehead. As a last resort small boobs are ok, but the tattoo is a must. Filed teeth optional. No thin chicks! Bulimia's are not welcome!

PERSONAL MESSAGE: Do you know that I can eat and chew at the same time?

Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Scopium: 8:17am On Sep 18, 2008
[size=13pt]The second dude is really hot. Is that your boyfriend Gabry?[/size]
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Gabry(f): 8:21am On Sep 18, 2008
Ahhh Ahhh. . . I am the agent and I am not allowed to date my client. For your info, the 2nd dude is a female and its Sista Ibkaye you're talking about.

Anywayz, Scopium, care to date anyone of ma client?  grin
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by jubocycke(m): 8:45am On Sep 18, 2008
gabrywyl u no get work oooooooo
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Gabry(f): 8:52am On Sep 18, 2008
Eh. . . . This is my job. So do you want to date my client or not? angry
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by jmkbond(f): 8:56am On Sep 18, 2008
.walahi,she get work but she never do,beta go meet ur assistance maickal or so,in ur toillet washing business, or else no lunch today,remember no food 4 lazy gabyyy
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Gabry(f): 8:58am On Sep 18, 2008
Na waaaa ohhhh. . . . Are you both jubocycke and jmkbond related to each otha or something?

Mind you ohhh. . . . I own this busoiness by maself so I eat wheneva I want and I be my own boss.

One again I will say this, are you interested in ma client ?
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Jeovy(m): 9:02am On Sep 18, 2008
Gaby,Nice job you got there
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Gabry(f): 9:03am On Sep 18, 2008
Finally you talk some sense around here. grin
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Gabry(f): 9:21am On Sep 18, 2008
People, if you come in here, I assume you are interested in ma clients or you want to be apart of this dating site. angry
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by romsky: 10:46am On Sep 18, 2008
application for d post of finance manager cool
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by newdeal(m): 11:33am On Sep 18, 2008
gabrywyl:

Eh. . . . This is my job. So do you want to date my client or not? angry

Thank God you finally found your job as chairlady of[b] fuglyworld. com[/b] grin
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Scopium: 12:40pm On Sep 18, 2008
gabrywyl:

Ahhh Ahhh. . . I am the agent and I am not allowed to date my client. For your info, the 2nd dude is a female and its Sista Ibkaye you're talking about.

Anywayz, Scopium, care to date anyone of ma client?  grin

[size=13pt]I'm an agent as well so I can't date my clients. I'll go for the agent as well.[/size]
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Scopium: 12:42pm On Sep 18, 2008
[size=13pt]No be only finance manager, . . . . fiancee damager follow join wink[/size]
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by ndumart: 1:04pm On Sep 18, 2008
gabry

I envy ur job oh. Its second to none.

I would be puking everyday if i were in ur shoes(which are rather too big for me)
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by manickal(m): 1:16pm On Sep 18, 2008
GABRYWYL. abeg, please, dont put my name up there. u know i'm too handsome to be on this ya crazy dating site. i aint boasting oh. do u want to spoil show for me? grin . infact, i refuse to belive it was my own manickal u are talking about. i'm sure there's some 1 else who bears that name on nairaland. angry
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Scopium: 6:39pm On Sep 18, 2008
[size=13pt]Ndumart which one you dey envy? The fart part or the date part?[/size]
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by MrInfo1(m): 8:13pm On Sep 18, 2008
Abeg shey clem don apply ?
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by studio43(m): 8:25pm On Sep 18, 2008
wetin u me by that?
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by studio43(m): 8:26pm On Sep 18, 2008
mean* wink
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by MrInfo1(m): 8:54pm On Sep 18, 2008
Just ponderin' undecided
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by jmkbond(f): 11:42pm On Sep 18, 2008
gabby im sure ure not referin to me[jay]cos i 4 don damage u.in ur own interest no 4get ma toilet dt i paid u to wash.ill try to get an EXIT 4 u and info 4rm yaba director* C**********8 so he culd help to make d work faster.and 4 u to return back in good time.so u wudnt keep d guards waitin
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Gabry(f): 1:22am On Sep 19, 2008
romade:

application for d post of finance manager cool

Ok, you're in. Probation for 2 days. Show me what you've got. wink

newdeal:

Thank God you finally found your job as chairlady of[b] fuglyworld. com[/b] grin

Mind you, this is not the only job I got. Dont forget the farting Manager post in the otha thread. smiley

Scopium:

[size=13pt]I'm an agent as well so I can't date my clients. I'll go for the agent as well.[/size]
So you're telling me that you're dating yourself shocked Damn. . . . You betta go get a head check ohhh

ndumart:

gabry

I envy your job oh.

Yes I know I got the best job ever! grin

manickal:

GABRYWYL. abeg, please, don't put my name up there. u know i'm too handsome to be on this ya crazy dating site. i aint boasting oh. do u want to spoil show for me? grin . infact, i refuse to believe it was my own manickal u are talking about. i'm sure there's some 1 else who bears that name on nairaland. angry
HAAAAA!!! I know you be handsome bobo ohhh. . . I have seen your pic. You're damn fine mehn. . . Just pullin your legs in here. grin

Scopium:

[size=13pt]Ndumart which one you dey envy? The fart part or the date part?[/size]
He envy's all of it grin

infobaba:

Abeg shey clem don apply ?

Clem is damn fine so she no fit apply. Since you be ma monkey boy, why dont you apply first? grin

jmkbond:

gabby im sure ure not referin to me[jay]because i 4 don damage u.in your own interest no forget ma toilet dt i paid u to wash.ill try to get an EXIT for you and info from yaba director* C**********8 so he culd help to make d work faster.and for you to return back in good time.so u wudnt keep d guards waitin

Where on earth did I mention you? Ma clients are My Wang, Ibkaye and manickal. Where did you see the word J or jmkbond
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Scopium: 8:31am On Sep 19, 2008
[size=13pt]Gabry you are an agent too, are you dating yourself? undecided undecided[/size]
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Gabry(f): 8:32am On Sep 19, 2008
yes I'm an agent and no, I am not dating myself and not dating otha agents as well.
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Scopium: 9:03am On Sep 19, 2008
[size=13pt]Ok I denounce my agentship so I can date you kiss kiss[/size]
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by Gabry(f): 9:08am On Sep 19, 2008
I fit be nun ohhh. . . Havent you heard? tongue
Re: Ugly People Dating Site by clemcykul(f): 9:17am On Sep 19, 2008
nun sad sad

dont dare be a nun? how can bla bla bla progress now dat ure a nun?

i no like dis o

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