Take heart sis
Let him go!
Time will definitely heal you

Its difflicult but take heart... All is well... U don wana experience what sickler parent experience... Its a blessing in disguise..

Now Playing; Neyo- So sick.


Op, you just gat to take heart and move forward, take it that God doesn't want you to be a widow with sickling children so early in your life

'He wants someone who is AA'... This should be ur line not his. All thesame thank ur stars he made it easier for you even tho it hurts bt trust me, it's better this way cos IVF & adoption stuff might sound quite cool now bt would av posed a threat to ur marriage eventually. Move on sis..!

cinderellla: Hello,

I've been a guest on nairaland for years, I've been broken and I'm lost...

I'm in my early twenties, a christain and I'm AS (genotyPe). I've been heartbroken once in my life due to my genotyPe, after that incident I always ask for your genotyPe before I know your age.


I met someone and we were childhood friends till we sePerated, he told me he was SS and I immediately rebuked the idea of us dating( not because of he was SS but because I'm AS)..

We maintained our friendshiP but rebuked our courtshiP...Unfortunately, we fell in love and he talked about IVF and PGD. I was hesitant at first but he convinced me (He's a doctor). We talked, Planned and we made our Plans to get married..

I always wanted to confide in my Parents but he made me not too, we even talked about adoPtion incase the IVF fails and I was oPen to it.

I did not care about the rumuors of sicklers, i did not care about having my own biological children.


I loved him beyond it all, beyond his looks, beyond his crises, I loved everything..
He came to my house with his Parents and they accePted, he sent the news around and everything.

He called me last month that he had doubts about my genotyPe and he wants someone that's AA..
We talked about it and he decided to sstick with me, I asked him about 100times and he said he was sure.


Today, he sent a message that he wants to end it all and that he wants someone who is aa .

Isn't it obvious that someone is putting pressure on him not to marry you, probably his parents? They probably were in the dark about your genotype as well and he just told them and they are putting the squeeze on him to drop you. Confront him with this and encourage him to talk about what has made huk change his mind then tell him you've been through the same doubts and you are ready to go through any difficulty with him. Don't just give up, fight for your man!

My sister if ur story is true, then that guy is very heartless and wicked, and does not deserve you. I don't why some men are very insensitive, is he a baby, can't he think!!!, so after meeting with ur parents over his intentions, sends word out, he now decides to chicken out via txt msg, the dude no even get "balls" to say it in front of u, very immature person.

Babe just move on, God might just have saved you from one crisis. Pick up the pieces of ur life and move, don't look back o, no time... God will give you ur partner, and AA for that matter.

^^^^of course, this is the romantic me speaking. Girl are you sure you want to marry an SS? Its tough o. I've seen sicklers in crisis and its not a pretty sight, pretty depressing. Then knowing that they have a greater probability of dying...girl. I dunno. He might actually be doing you a favour o.

He is not a bad Person.. He is a good Person, although he has some challenges.
I just hate myself for not sticking to my initial decision and sometimes, I wonder if I was a Plan B in his life.
I've had men that are AA ask me out but I really loved him.
I always wanted to marry ssomeone I love and understand that's why I chose him.

He convinced me when I had doubts, when I was confused, he exPlained it all.
I'm just sad.

5minsmadness:

Isn't it obvious that someone is putting pressure on him not to marry you, probably his parents? They probably were in the dark about your genotype as well and he just told them and they are putting the squeeze on him to drop you. Confront him with this and encourage him to talk about what has made huk change his mind then tell him you've been through the same doubts and you are ready to go through any difficulty with him. Don't just give up, fight for your man!

Which man? The man no be "man" jare. What I find revulsive is that the man is supposed to be learned, a medical doctor, I mean he should have known what is/should be involved.

He was the one that convinced her, he was not forced to meet the lady's parents, and he made his intentions known. Why get every bodies hope high, and ends up dashing it. OP should just ignore him kpatakpata.

Such a 'funny' twist. Move on dear.

We've told my parents.

He sounds confused but I do not care.

He said he is just being real, I wonder if he was fake before.
I blame myself for everything.
The annoying fact is that he is a resiident doctor and he is 10years older than me.
He should be more enlightened.
I blame myself for iit all.

So sorry about all this, please don't blame your self, that's life for you, we win some, we lose some, just trust that there is a reason all this is happening now, u will look back and smile in future and say thank God it went this way. Worry not, someone better will come your way.

5minsmadness:

Isn't it obvious that someone is putting pressure on him not to marry you, probably his parents? They probably were in the dark about your genotype as well and he just told them and they are putting the squeeze on him to drop you. Confront him with this and encourage him to talk about what has made huk change his mind then tell him you've been through the same doubts and you are ready to go through any difficulty with him. Don't just give up, fight for your man!

this is the worst advice you should give to your fellow woman. Don't advice someone else on what you will never do. You didn't bother to think about the health of the children they will bear if they start having kids. That's too bad!

@op,please move on with your life,you will surely meet another man with a better and matching genotype who will love you more.

Always think with your head and hold on to your convictions. Why will he tell you to hide such a serious issue from your parents. That was clue 1. If anything happens to him, who will take over the burden of taking care of your immediate needs! Those same parents. If you cannot be open with your parents about important things on your intending, then you are not looking out for your best interest. But for the other person's interest and this is the result when he decides to leave you. Just move on. Your match in the first place was very very unreasonable

Thank you all.

Hahahahaha my dear you are AS and you want to marry SS....you better consider the break up as a blessing in disguise. I guess you havnt seen when an sS person is having crisis....a vey terrible thing to see

Am also AS lol I ask the "what is your genotype question" after asking your name.

I know how you feel...trust me I do! But the truth is this guy did YOU and himself a big favour...
Cry all you want,look morosely at things but you ve got to move on #eHug

There are alot of AA guys out there, he that is SS know what he has been thru, pls cont wit yr search for mr right, he is just helping u avoid future heart ache, sometimes love alone is not enough, pls move on and always find out genotype b4 gettin close to the opp intimacy

There is nothing bad in marrying ss.
my sister is ss and we did not know until she was 24yrs when she had severe malaria attack prompting blood test. also, ss can be managed but as we all know some pips can take some while others cant. if u marry as u will likely have 1aa, 2as and 1ss but the prob is that all ur children can be either of the 3

My dear take heart because he actually saved you the trauma of caring for sick babies

cinderellla: We've told my parents.

He sounds confused but I do not care.

He said he is just being real, I wonder if he was fake before.
I blame myself for everything.
The annoying fact is that he is a resiident doctor and he is 10years older than me.
He should be more enlightened.
I blame myself for iit all.

don't blame urself........ but thank ur star because he made it easier for the break-up
you don't choose who to fall inlove with, but its ur head that we will tell you who u stay inlove with....

So u fell for him and its time to rise up and move on

My dear, if you love yourself , you should run for your life .

Is this supposed to be an issue? that someone made a very wise decision that is best for the both of you, aren't you supposed to be grateful to him? you should appreciate Gods mercy in your life

nurey: There is nothing bad in marrying ss.
my sister is ss and we did not know until she was 24yrs when she had severe malaria attack prompting blood test. also, ss can be managed but as we all know some pips can take some while others cant. if u marry as u will likely have 1aa, 2as and 1ss but the prob is that all ur children can be either of the 3

Please retest your sister. That's not SS. Either the lab made a mistake or she is SC. Test your sister again in a teaching hospital before she mistakenly gets married to an AS or SS man. I have warned you o, I know what am saying.

It's a good thing you both broke up.The pain for you was that it shouldn't have lasted this long in the first place but it's better for you.All that story about IVF,PGD whatever ain't worth all that trouble.
You really don't wanna know what stress you've been saved from.

5minsmadness:
Please retest your sister. That's not SS. Either the lab made a mistake or she is SC. Test your sister again in a teaching hospital before she mistakenly gets married to an AS or SS man. I have warned you o, I know what am saying.

She is already married to AS and their daughter is SS. No major issues for now and the child is 2yrs plus, but it is hard to get penicillin for the child.