1ST EPISODE]:

When I was 17, I made a vow to leave my parents' harsh canopy. I decided that I would gain my total freedom before my 20th birthday. I had my primary and secondary school education in Ifo Local Government, Ogun State (same town where my parents lived). I also attended a Polytechnic in this same state but in a different Local Government. By the time I was 20, I had virtually spent 20 good solid years living with my parents in the same state.

When it was time for me to go observe my Industrial Training (I.T.), I frankly told my family that I wanted to go continue my life in another state. My father agreed but you know mothers, she didn't agree. I never cared about that though. I had already made up my mind. I didn't ask them for any money or any help whatsoever. I just wanted to inform them that I would be leaving their house anytime from that moment. I had already been to an ICT company in Ibadan to enquire if I could be placed for a 1-Year I.T in their company. I was lucky I got a placement and was even placed on a monthly salary of N10,000 which was unusual as said by the boss of the company. I got free accommodation as well....I was indeed very lucky and blessed. I never wanted to be a tutor or work as a teacher, but after the interview I had with the boss of the ICT company, he made it known to me that I would be good as a tutor in their training school which have been on a recess for a short period of time. So, my job was to bring the school back to life and also maintain it as a tutor throughout my 1-year IT period.

I resumed work at Barachel Computer Systems Limited, Ibadan on the 1st day of July, 2011. Hmmmm....a new beginning in a new state.....coupled with the fact that I had total freedom. I was sooo happy and fulfilled. My family didn'teven know where I worked and lived, but we always kept in touch.

I declared the training school opened after 2 weeks of preparation. My first student was a girl who just passed out from a 'girls ONLY' secondary school. She was brought by her Dad in a Peugeot salon car. Demilade, a humble, pretty, always smiling tall girl who had 'a bright future' - *what my gang in Polytechnic use for small pretty girls who with all indications will be more fashionable and pretty as she grows.* I registered her in that very day and told her to begin lectures the next day. Make I no lie for you....Demilade na one babe wey set diiiieeee. She get all the features I wan make my babe get. But, I never dey sure of her age and character. Demilade became the first girl I had as friend in Ibadan because apart from being my favorite student in the training school, we became very close and sometimes shared great moments together after class. She knew my girlfriend cuz I had one. She didn't have a boyfriend, she was just 16. Damn! This one na child abuse if I toast this babe ooo. 16 years? And me ayam 20, 4 years difference? Haba! E too much.

Demilade was friendly and proved to be a girl a responsible guy would love to have and be very proud of. I got to know some in-depth things about Demilade....she looked like someone who will never have time for boys. You know all these kinda girls who always prove to be very difficult to get by guys. I guess this was as a result of the girls ONLY school she attended. However, I'm also this kinda guy who hates to be turned down by a girl, a small girl for that matter. So, I just had to maintain the teacher-student relationship going on between Demilade and I.

OK! Shey you wan hear? I fell in love with Demilade the day she resumed lectures, but not so deeply. I get babe wey I dey date wey I leave for Ogun State and Demilade sabi her. So, Demilade was a NO-GO area. Though, I really love slim-statured portable babe and oh yeah, with a straight face. And the babe must be loving and caring. Demilade gat it all. She kan sexy join.

Imagine! You guyz didn't even ask for my name. Well, my name is Opemipo. I'm a very funny dude and a jovial individual who's very ambitious but very very playful. People seem to look at me as an "UNSERIOUS, NO AMBITION & CAREFREE" individual. Hehe....I always disappoint them when they see my works and progress. Me no too dey shout.

Emmanuel was a friend who lived close to where I was living, though younger than I am. Emmanuel was only a year older than Demilade. I told him about Demilade and with the way I sounded about her, Emmanuel developed interest in Demilade. Emmanuel asked if she was beautiful, me kan go spoil matter by using my sweet mouth to describe how glorious, adorable and very pretty Demilade was. Then, I showed Emmanuel a picture of Demilade I secretly took at the training school. Before I could retrieve back my words....Emmanuel had fallen in love with Demilade. I had earlier told Emmanuel that I would never have anything to do with any of my female students. And for the fact that I am way older than Demilade, Emmanuel would never think I had feelings for Demilade.

Emmanuel was unaware of my feeling for Demilade. He has never seen Demilade except from the picture I showed him which was not even very clear. He began asking me if he could come visit me at work so he would meet Demilade for the first time and probably have a chat with her.

I invited him over one day. I told Demilade someone would be coming to visit me and at the same time this person would love to see her....she was somehow surprised and curious cuz she just kept asking me who the person was. I calmed her spirit down by narrating everything to her before Emmanuel arrived.

Emmanuel asked her out that very day. After some weeks she said YES to Emmanuel's proposal. I was a lil bit disappointed. According to what I gathered later on, Demilade accepted to be Emmanuel's girlfriend because I put mouth for the matter. So, she respected me that much to become my friend's girlfriend? When me ayam dying to become her guy? How will I cope seeing these two together?

My mind became very heavy and troubled as a result of this issue.

2nd episode coming soon...

Bro tell me, if I no follow this, Which other one I go follow? Abeg ride on joo, d winch in your village no follow you reach the way I dey follow you.

more bullets to your AK47. type fast, I dey this corner on one 3 legs chair, no table, I don't care, dealing wt my popcorn no water.. still don't care..... all I know is Sa continue.

*Grabs 1st seat*
















while waiting for next episode.

it seems interesting ryt? let's continue...

Continuation...

2ND EPISODE]:

I wasn't really happy with the fact that Emmanuel and Demilade were dating. Sincerely, I had sleepless nights thinking of how to break them up. I thought of putting up a fight with Emmanuel. But then, I thought it would be immature of me to do such a thing as I am older than Emmanuel. I blamed myself for not acting fast. I just had to play along and pretend like I was in total support of their union.

Demilade never missed calling me every night to ask how my day went. She had graduated from our training school by this time but she came visiting sometimes just to check on me and her friends who were still our students. Emmanuel got admission into a private University and my prayers to God received utmost attention when Emmanuel started messing up. Demilade started complaining to me of how Emmanuel had stopped calling and giving her necessary attention and when she called him, he sometimes wouldn't even pick up her calls and if he picked he wouldn't respond well.

All these reports kinda made me happy. Abi now, na opportunity be this and I must not misuse it. I would call Emmanuel and act like I wasn't happy with the way he was treating Demilade. And I would also pet Demilade to farabale sey all will be well.....all na scope. All through this period, I wasn't still sure if the feelings I had for Demilade was genuine.

Demilade visited me in my office once in a while. She would come with great gifts. There were times she wouldn't even call to inform me that she was coming. If she came and didn't meet me on seat, I'd meet my gift in office. Demilade discussed almost everything about herself with me. I knew her more than her boyfriend, Emmanuel. It got to a time when Demilade stopped complaining about Emmanuel and I felt maybe she just got tired of Emmanuel's unseriousness. That's a good green light for me to test my faith.

Each time I tried to tell her what I felt for her, my love for my Ogun State girlfriend pulled me back. Demilade had a whole lot of problems securing an admission into higher institution. She wrote exams into over 3 federal universities but luck wasn't on her side. She told me all these. Knowing all these information about her, and with the way we relate with each other, if I don't let her know of my feelings for her, she'd just take me as a brother, I assumed.

The day I called her to tell her what I've been feeling about her, it was then she announced to me that she's gained admission into one of the Federal Universities she wrote their examinations. She didn't sound so good cuz she didn't like the school. It was my duty to make her feel good about the school, of which I did. I encouraged her to go for it even though she wasn't offered the course she desired to study. I spent all my credit talking to her like a special adviser. So, there was no time to confess. Case adjourned.

I left Barachel Computer Systems Limited after spending only 6 months of my supposed 12 months Industrial Training (I.T.). As I've mentioned earlier, I'm a very ambitious man who loves to take daring steps. I became an entrepreneur even without completing my IT year. I began a Home Service Computer Training. It went smoothly for me at the beginning. Later on, things became tough for me. So, I had to level up my services by becoming a software agent for companies. Things somehow became normal again. However, I and Emmanuel still got in touch. As a matter of fact, I sometimes visited him and his elder brother (who's in the same school with him) in their school.

Emmanuel and his elder brother came home for a short break. Desmond was just 2 years older than Emmanuel. In other words, Emmanuel was Demilade's age-mate. When I went to visit Emmanuel in their house....we had a playful argument over the way he had been treating Demilade....Emmanuel revealed tp me that he was no longer interested in Demilade and all he could do was to ignore her calls. I looked straight into his eyes and told him he was joking. Meanwhile, I was having a great party inside me. Desmond asked to know why we were arguing and I explained some things to him. He asked who the Demilade was. I already had many beautiful pictures of Demilade on my phone. I showed him some of Demilade's pictures and his facial expression changed instantly and asked to know more about Demilade. I foolishly told him all he needed to know. Hoping what happened when I talked about Demilade to Emmanuel wouldn't repeat itself this time around.

Demilade began processing her admission. If there were no calls, we would chat on social networks. I had begun giving her some hints about my feelings for her. Demilade, as wise as she was, must have known where I was driving at. Now that she and Emmanuel were no longer together....I was free to say whatever that has been bothering me. As I was about to hit the nail on its head.....something happened.

One faithful afternoon, Demilade called and asked what Emmanuel, Desmond and I were trying to play on her. "A game?", she asked. She told me Desmond whom she never knew existed just asked her out. She claimed Desmond told her that since she was no longer his brother's girlfriend, and they've (Desmond and Demilade) been into each other for some time now, which I felt wasn't true but Desmond wanted a step further by having a relationship. I lost words that afternoon.

When and how did Desmond and Demilade get connected. He said they've been into each other for some time ....how?.....when? She didn't tell me all these. Why would Desmond even ask Demilade out?, her younger brother's ex even if they were friends.

I really can't say what came over me the next day when I went to Desmond's house.....I scatter floor for both of them gidigan.

3rd episode coming on its way.

keep following...

Ride on

now let's continue. am i having readers here?

Akinlex, I must comment ur great effort in writing dis lovely piece. Like seriously? U re a gud story teller, i just dey laff as i dey follow ur tori, dats hw gud u are dude. Keep it up. Following u like kilode.

continue bro.... #dope

Continuation...

3RD EPISODE:

I didn't give Desmond chance for any sort of explanation. I just kept spilling words out of my mouth, coming straight from the bottom of my heart.....I really meant those words:
Me - "How on earth would you have asked your brother's ex-girlfriend out? What motivated you to do so? Desmond, I swear you really bleeped up."

I could see the shock on Emmanuel's face saying - "What dha Bleep? Unbelievable!". I wasn't really fighting Desmond for asking his younger brother's ex out....all was for my interest. Though, both of them had no clue about this.

Emmanuel looked at his elder brother with a squeezed face and then sharply turned to me and said:
Emmanuel - "Ope, sorry which of my ex please?"
Me - "Stupid question. You wanna act like you know nothing about this? Ok. The beautiful story is; your brother here asked Demilade out. He is already in love with your ex-girlfriend"
Emmanuel turned to Desmond who was already feeling ashamed.....Emmanuel was quiet for a while waiting for his brother to say something.
Desmond - "Guy, why you kan dey look me like that na? I toast the babe....no be lie. Na crime?"

Oh my goodness! He was not even moved at all. Surprisingly, Emmanuel began to laugh aloud like what Desmond said ain't bad at all. Desmond continued:
Desmond - "Why are you laughing now? Have you forgotten so quick? When you too go toast my own babe wey I still dey date that time....and you collected that babe from me. I talk? And come to think of it, this babe no be your babe again. So, why e dey pain you?"
Me - "Mogbe! Is this how you guyz throw your girlfriends at each other? Well, if that is the case....Demilade is NOT (I remember stressing that 'NOT' word very well) the kinda girl you'll do such a thing with."
Desmond - "What? What is your own? No be teacher you talk sey you be to this babe? Why you kan dey talk like sey you be her Papa?"

I saw Emmanuel smiling to those words and I was lost for words. How will I make these guys know that I've got great feelings for Demilade?

Desmond stood his ground that he was not gonna stop. He told me he was already in love with Demilade and he was ready to do anything to have her. I tried to explain to him that it's not nice of him to do such a thing with his brother's ex-girlfriend....I made him understand that he has not even met Demilade in his life....I told him he should know Demilade would never say YES because of the fact that she was his younger brother's ex.

It was as if all my words were like words of inspiration to Desmond cuz he was so adamant....he didn't look like someone who was ready to change his mind. So, I stopped bugging him.....Sleepless nights became the order of the night (so to say) for me.

But, I told Desmond that night that; Demilade that I know would never accept to be his girlfriend.

I became so scared to call Demilade after that afternoon she informed me about Desmond's evil work. She also didn't call me. Even when I see her online, we didn't chat. I was beginning to lose her.....and I hated Desmond for this.

Emmanuel and I became very close and he eventually got to know of my feelings for Demilade. I could remember what he told me one faithful evening when I confessed to him that I was in love with Demilade:
Emmanuel - "I knew there was something behind all these over-protective acts. So, you were really interested in this girl even before I had her as my girlfriend?"
I gave him no reply. Emmanuel continued:
"You know why I lost interest in Demilade? It was because of the intimacy she had with you....she told you almost everything about our relationship. You know her well even more than I do. Everytime she called, she would always say something about you."
I was faking a straight face while Emmanuel said all these words.....
"You know what? Demilade has got feelings for you too. Forget Desmond. We both know he's a jerk. Confess your feelings to Demilade. Don't let it die."

"Yeah, I should"....I thought. But, how e go be if the three of us (Desmond, Emmanuel and I) toast one babe within a year? E no go pure jooorrr. It will even look like we planned it or placed a bet on Demilade. And how me go dey follow these small chickens dey drag one babe? I simply threw the thoughts of ever having a chance to have Demilade out of my mind......but, it wasn't an easy task for me to do.

I didn't know how far about Desmond's activity with Demilade cuz I wouldn't ask him and Demilade and I seem to be on a talking strike. I knew if Demilade had accepted, Desmond would have come brag about it. So, I was still very sure Desmond will only just try but as I've prayed, always fail.

I continued living my lavidaloca life, focusing on my career and business. Always trying my best to put away my feelings for Demilade....each time the thought of calling her or sending her a text (at least to say 'Hi') creeped into my head.....I ignored it.

One particular afternoon, I was at a pharmaceutical company where I went to install a Store Inventory software.....I was having a short break after training some members of staff of the company. I was feeling bored, then I logged on to facebook to check if I could find someone to chat with. I saw Demilade online and the urge to say Hello took over me......I tried to jump over her name each time I scroll up and down my online friends list.....but her name kept screaming 'CHAT WITH ME!!!'. I couldn't resist it....I succumbed and sent her a 'Hello dear'.....I thought she wouldn't reply. She replied even before my message delivered. My face shone sparkles of beautiful lights on receiving her reply. No time to waste. The time to speak has come

Follows

abeg wea episode 4....cnt wait....nice wrt up

Episode four...

readers get ready...

Continuation...

Episode 4...

I didn't even bother to ask how life has been treating her or ask how she was adapting to her new environment; school. I told her: "I've missed you so much". She must have taken that as a friend-to-friend thing cuz the way she responded wasn't really lovely. But that didn't discourage me. What took over my spirit that afternoon was really awesome cuz till date I really can't remember how I began to confess how I'd really wanted her to be mine even before Emmanuel got into the scene....how I had loved her so much when she was still my student.

My people, I talk plenty things oooo....to the extent that I didn't care to read her replies until I had typed and sent everything that was on my mind to her. Then, I got a reply which almost made me cry:
Demilade - "Do you realize you are saying all these to your friend's girlfriend?"

I became paralyzed on the spot....every part of my body started shaking. I couldn't type anything.....even if I could, what do I have to send? When she discovered that I wasn't replying, she said:
"Are you there?"

I typed my reply very slowly like she would know that I really did that:
Me - "Yes, I am. Just that I'm short of words. I don't understand what you meant by my friend's girlfriend"
Demilade - "You don't understand? And why are you short of words?"

I became confused here. Which of my friends would she be talking about? Was it Emmanuel or Desmond? It couldn't be Emmanuel because he had broken up with her long ago. And Desmond.....it couldn't also be him....although, it's been a while since we talked.....he has gone back to school.....or has Demilade eventually agreed to be Desmond's girl? All these questions were becoming too much for me to answer so I decided to ask:
Me - "Which of my friends are you really talking about?"

My heart raced so quickly as I closed my eyes awaiting her reply....my phone vibrated alerting me of a new message. I slightly opened my eyes and I was taken aback by what I saw.

Akinlex, whatz up nau? Why re u nt updating? Hope all is well? Just checkin on u. Take care.

toykathy: Akinlex, whatz up nau? Why re u nt updating? Hope all is well? Just checkin on u. Take care.

just updated episode four, got a lot of things to do, as a student na, will keep updating...

Oya oya aunty iyanu z waiting o

Aipete2: Oya oya aunty iyanu z waiting o

lol... keep waiting ooo

Thats cute of u. Thz 4d update. More ink 2 ur pen dear.

to keep this thread busy and carry you guys along as the story of demilade, desmond and co is still under writing, let me drop another interesting story.

i will continue with this story about desmond and co later. please bear with me...

this one is titled LAMENTATIONS OF AN UGLY GIRL (part 1)

With my bag and baggage, I bundled myself into a bus going out of Ibadan to school. Buried in my novel, I heard the driver call out “last bus stop” I packed my things off the bus and boarded the bus-shuttle into campus.

As soon as I got to my hostel room and unpacked, I pinged my girls, none of them was in school except Bola, so I decided to go to her place. I then called her

ME: Hello

BOLA: T-lines how far?

ME: I dey ooo, you dey house?

BOLA: Of course, are you coming?

ME: sure

You must have noticed she called me T-lines there. Well, T-lines is the name Liz coined for me. It so happened that Viv went for a modelling audition and dropped my number as her other number. I was called and told that I was picked for the modelling job. Here I was telling my friends:

ME: they don pick me do model ooo!

LIZ: ehn model, na ONWARD u wan model for?

ME: I don’t get you (looking lost)

LIZ: your advert go sweet ooo, Lines, lines and more lines (pointing at my face)

VIV: na me o, my phone’s battery was flat

BOLA: (laughing) Tola lines

LIZ: no ooo T-lines

ME: una no well o

LIZ: T-lines for Onward model

Funny how that name has stuck with me since then.

“This Bola’s hall mate can like to do Aristo ehn”, I thought to myself as I breezed past an ash-coloured car in Bola’s off-k apartment. “Bola ooo” I called out at her door before knocking. “Girlfriend”, she said as she opened this door. Ehn ehn see Bola o, this girl is looking all fresh.

“You have been chopping all your popsy’s money abi see your skin, Ele to clean” I yapped letting my Ibadan ascent get ahead of me in this latter part.

“You don’t look bad either ooo” she replied. We caught up on gist (we don’t gossip anyways) *rolls eyes*munching the spaghetti and sauce she made. “Ehn Ehn, Bola, your hall mate don come nii?” I almost forgot. “No, she hasn’t, why did you ask?”

“Who now has the car I saw outside?” replying her question with another question. I could not believe my ears, Bola brought the car, (don`t get me wrong, not trying to underrate her but she should have told me something at least a hint).

“I just wanted to watch how you’d react,” she answered, dangling the keys. I opened my mouth to say something but I could only mouth a scream. We went outside and trust my Yoruba-bred-self to over-pray for her “Emi a lo, o ni fi gba eyan, won oni kolu e o, Bola” laying stress on the Bola as I sat in the driver’s seat fiddling with the steering wheel. As much as I am happy for her, I am happy for myself too oh! This means doubling of rep, escalation of shakara, rolling with big girl with big toy. We decided not to tell Vivian and Liz just to see their reactions too.

It could take only a surprise like that to make me forget my mission *007 like myself*. I had gone to her place with one aim only: to steal the black pumps I had seen on her DP three days earlier and anything else that catches my fancy knowing that there is always something to steal from a babe who changes her entire wardrobe every semester. Last semester, it was a brown boyfriend jacket

The next Friday when Viv and Liz finally decided to come to school, you should have seen Liz and her melodrama acting like the car was a baby meanwhile Vivian was like “nice, cool” *this girl like to form ehn* (don’t say I told you o).

“What if we all go and unwind before the semester wahala plus I just wash the car for you guys”. Bola asked

“That’s true, no be only wash you gats bath am sef” Liz replied, violently pushing the buttons on the car stereo in a frantic attempt to play music.

“Let’s meet at my place at say eight” Bola continued.

“We can always trust you to make a late entry, you look good anyways,” Liz said, immediately Vivian stepped in the room filling the air with her scent later that day.

“Leggo, let’s do this” Bola shouted dabbing on lipstick. Looking all decked up, we walked into the VIP section of one of the most exclusive bar/club around campus tailed by the eyes of others at the bar. Bola began to down the drink as soon as she bought the bottle. Soon she and Liz were dancing like witches under anointing while I was uploading pictures on almost every social media I was on.

“Stupid boy”, I said aloud about to type the words in reply to my brother who was teasing me about using my Aristo’s car as DP. Just as I clicked on the track pad, I felt someone tap my shoulder from behind.

“Hello” I heard the owner of the hand say in a rich baritone voice. I turned to look at him but I could not make out the face because of the dim lights in the bar. Before I replied, he continued asking if I would like to dance

“Depending on who is asking?” a little famzing won’t hurt now abi”.

“Who else, me of course” He replied laughing.

“Ok, let’s see” I stretched my neck to reach his ears because of the blaring music from the speakers. I could notice his tiny gold necklace as it glowed in the dark.

Time to finally practice my bathroom dance steps on someone, comfortably Skelewu-ing as Davido’s Skelewu was playing, I saw him smile, He sef try as he was quite a good dancer, we danced through, D’banj’s Raise your glasses and other tunes before Viv came to tell me that it was time to leave. We exchanged BBM pins and God bless GLO, that night we became chatty. His name was Segun, Microbiology department’s social secretary, loves to watch football and meet people.

“Come down ooo” Vivian called me out of cyberspace. “Wait first, na Vivian drive” I thought to myself but was too engrossed in the chat to talk. We chatted about everything from politics to fashion to entertainment before I fell asleep but not before we chose to meet at the cafeteria the next day.

At around 10pm, the following day, I pinged Segun and told him.

Madam Tola Suave - Approaching the cafeteria in a bit, hope you are still coming

A Sage named Sege - Sure, I’ll be there in a sec

Madam Tola suave - Okay already waiting ooo

After typing, I gave myself another once over, I try nah, pulling up the Sasha P look, which is my favourite anyways, with red jacket, white top and black jeans. I entered into the cafeteria after notifying him I was there. Just as I was about rummaging through my bag for my mirror and lipsticks, the red notification light on my BB caught my attention

A Sage named Sege - I can`t find you ooo, What are you wearing?

Madam Tola Suave - Red top

Please note this is not a story written by me.

LAMENTATIONS OF AN UGLY GIRL (part 2)


“Weyrey, olori buruku oshi” I said aloud as I found out that the bastard had deleted me off his BBM. “Hope all is well,” one of the waiters asked in Yoruba. Without uttering a word, I picked up my bag and left. “Before the idiot spoils my day, make I find something do,” I thought to myself, putting my earphone to activate my other brain, the one that does not think at all. The rest of the week seemed really fast and boring as lectures were gradually commencing.
To get the thoughts of Segun who is easier referred to as the bastard off my mind, I decided to cook, yes, cooking is to me as shopping is to most babes, very therapeutic to me, marry me now abi?
“Tope, Tiwa, Tolani” I heard from behind me, on my way to class the following Monday. I turned to see who it was.
“You don’t remember me” he said walking up to me, pausing to let me think.
“Ridwan, the guy you met with Liz at the market on Saturday. Oh, Liz had introduced me to him but I was too busy calculating in my head to give him a thought.
“Oh, don’t mind me jare, memory full” I replied pointing to my head. “The name is Tolani anyways” I continued. We talked as we walked to class parting blocs to my department.
“hey, Tolani, never thought I’d run into you today o” Ridwan said feigning surprise
“Oh” I replied but in my mind, I was like “Oh if I slap you ehn, who do you think you are deceiving?” I had seen him pacing on the corridor of my department floor in the middle of Dr Awho’s class. So he had been waiting for me”. He escorted me to my hostel before he turned back. Over the next few days, he became very stalk-ish bumping into me from every corner, every other time.
“So are you going to your hostel?” He asked. “No, I’m going to the library” I retorted. Sharp babe like me, he would not follow me there.
Astonishingly, he followed me o saying he had planned to go too.
“Omo, dem don Behind up this library o” I said aloud as the guilt of my parents telling me to be a regular library student and not setting foot there in over a session filled my mind. I shrugged it off, picked a random book and sat in a quite crowded place just to discharge him. At least that worked but not for long, about half an hour later, he came to tell me he was leaving then he asked for my phone number. Wait! With all the eyes, it would inhumane to refuse to and I don’t want popularity as the ugly girl forming. The thought of giving him a wrong number came to my mind but since he would still “bump” into me, I gave him the right one and he left immediately.
While I was busy racking my brain on how to finish my assignment, Beyonce’s I was here, my ringtone, I picked and guess who it was, you guessed right, Ridwan asking me if I had gotten to my hostel, like we just got some some. I saved his number and made a mental note not to pick his call again but he kept calling, leaving a message after over ten calls within 2-3days. And the ‘bumping into me’ didn’t stop. He was stalking me.
Truth is I don’t even like the guy, he is not even close to the type I like, I am taller than he is, plus he is skinny too like Kcee(Limpopo)’s trousers, he is not fine and not ugly, he is just there sha. The direct opposite of the tall, fair and handsome with Praiz-like beards, smile like John Legend (with no tattoos ooo). Don’t mind me with all my specifications but if you are anything like that you can drop your twitter handle, I’d mention you after I check the avi nii ooo.
One fateful day like they say in secondary school essays, he called me and told me he wanted to see me (in plain terms). In this school, if a guy tells you in plain terms ‘I want to see you for something important’, it’s either to ask the girl out or preach the word. If it is for the former, it’s a Capital NO but if it is for the latter, God forgive me; he go try, God forgive me again *kneels down*. I kept forming busy but he just wanted to see me at all cost.
Finally, after “bumping into me”for the umpteenth time on one hot afternoon, he sat me down on one of those ever-dirty seat under the tree just outside my faculty. “Thank you for coming with me here, I really appreciate it” he started. He digressed, talking about his course, how he has to write a term paper and all other things that did not sink. All I could think of was leaving that place then he muttered, “It is basically about history and culture degradation in south-west Nigeria, using Egba, Oshogbo, Ibadan or ethnic group as a case study so I thought you wouldn’t mind being photographed for me?”
I did not get it at first so there was about a few seconds of silence before it rang in my brain like a catholic mass bell. He wanted me to take pictures of my face so he could put it in some Ibadan woman from 1940 to present chart. I bolted out the seat and stormed away but not without giving him a piece of my mind. “So you have been stalking me since so I can be your guinea pig. Ah what nonsense, Christ, What are you?” I shouted not minding the people who were focused on me already. “God why? Is it my fault?” I thought to myself as I sank into the seat of the cab taking me out of campus. I needed a break from all of this madness.
As if Bola knew, she hugged me as soon as I showed at her doorstep; the tears that had filled my soul came running straight through my eyes immediately. Amazed, “what happened Tolani” Bola asked. Amidst sobs, I relayed the whole situation; she simply brought a bottle of Baileys that we drank from until I fell asleep.
“Did you say Liz introduced you to the idiot?” Bola asked as I was trying to rinse my face the next morning. I mumbled a yes trying to rinse my mouth too. She called Liz, I just stabbed classes since my eyes had gone sore and by evening, Liz came around, I explained the whole dilemma over again. She explained to us that she did not know him like that much and that they just got talking about ‘keeping up with the Kardashians’ show. She recommended going to shout and warn him, the idea was brushed off as soon as the evil genius Bola came up with an idea. The rest of the night was quite fun has PHCN decided to help us watch some set of films over juice. It was all girls lazing around.
The next Monday, after scrolling through my mentions, DMS and pings, I called him
ME: hello
Ridwan: hey, morning, I’m very sorry for…………..
ME: Don’t worry, I took it wrong, if I am not proud of myself then who will be proud of me?
Ridwan: Maybe it was the way I put it
ME: (cut in again) so when is your term paper due?
Ridwan: Next week Tuesday
ME: so when do we meet for the pictures. Should I take pictures from my phone or should we use a photographer.
Ridwan: Friday, if you don’t mind, the photographer would be better so I can get a vantage view.
ME: Ok till then, Bye.