If you look the world over, you will see many overgrown bachelors, men who are over 40 years of age but are still single. Many of these men are handsome, well to do or even wealthy, yet they are still single and refuse to marry.

I met one such men sometimes ago that was over 40 years of age, when I probed on why he was still single, initially he answered that there was nothing wrong with him, but when I showered him my website and many articles I have written on marriage and relationships, he opened up and told me “MAN I AM SCARED, AM AFRAID TO GET MARRIED”.

Of a truth, he was not alone as there are many like him who are overgrown bachelors who are still single, they are scared and afraid of the responsibilities of getting married. The man has the boldness to declare that the reason why he refused to marry was because he wanted to live long, according to him, women are generally bad and had caused some men to die before their time.

My further probing, I learn t that the young man has had failed relationships more than three times, that was the reason why he had the impression that all women are bad, coupled with the fact that when he was growing up, he had seen his father and mother quarrel many times. In fact, his father died at the age of 62 of heart failure and he suspected that the constant quarrel with his mother was responsible for that.

Yes, when you see young men that came from a broken home, or a home where there were constant quarrel between husband and wife, such men are scared of marriage. That is why you see some scream that “if that is how marriage is like, I rather stay single”. If they should tell you the truth, you will observe that their main reason was FEAR, they were afraid or scared of the huddles associated with marriage.

From my discussion with that man, he told me that more than three times he got serious with ladies, but had to call it a quit with each of the ladies once there was any disagreement with the ladies.

I had to tell him categorically that who he was looking for a slave or a lady who will be a rubber stamp and not a wife. I told him that any lady that he will marry who will accept 100% of his decisions and opinions will never be a good wife.

I am glad to say that after my time with the man, his orientation and opinion about marriage changed and he got married three months latter.
You see, one of the ways to knockout marital fear from any man is to help him see marriage in its true and proper perspectives, to see marriage the way GOD the originator of marriage sees it.

We will look at what the originator of marriage says in Genesis 2 verse 8, And the LORD God said, “it is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a help meet for him.”

In verses 21 – 24 of the same chapter, “And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;

vs 22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

vs 23 And Adam said, “This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man”.

vs 24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

The true perspective and understanding about marriage is what is seen in verse 24 of Genesis “therefore shall a man LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER, AND SHALL CLEAVE UNTO HIS WIFE: AND THEY SHALL BE ONE FLESH.”

Man, you will never run a successful home until you leave your father and mother and cleave to your wife. Men who divorce their wives had never cleaved to their wives. Couples who cleave to each other will never think of divorce because they cleaved to each other, therefore are inseparable.

After leaving your father and mother and cleaving to each other, the next thing is to becoming one flesh. Couples who became one flesh indeed, will never think of divorce because the two are inseparable.

I have never seen a man who is normal that started hitting or beating himself, so when you became one flesh with your wife, you will never raise your hand to hit or beat her.

Equally I have never seen a woman who woke up one day and started abusing herself, in other words, a woman who sees her husband as been one flesh with her, will never open her mouth to abuse him.

What in your own opinion are other things making men afraid to get married?