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For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church - Religion (2) - Nairaland

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Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by Dopeyomi(m): 10:14am On Nov 30, 2014
sonOfLucifer:
I am in church now.



grin sonoflucifer in cHurch


'Kod' forbid baÐt tHing
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by Idyllik(f): 10:14am On Nov 30, 2014
I don't sleep in church

1 Like 1 Share

Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by Warlord3000(m): 10:15am On Nov 30, 2014
Nice
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by Dopeyomi(m): 10:15am On Nov 30, 2014
Idyllik:
I don't sleep in church


It is a lie

Adonbelivit

Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by ellechrystal(f): 10:16am On Nov 30, 2014
Piam
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by Jakeattah(m): 10:18am On Nov 30, 2014
Na 5 hours preaching dey cause am
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by gneisss: 10:19am On Nov 30, 2014
i hardly sleep in church nomata the temptation.. if i can't take it any more i go chill outside for awhile or i go home

1 Like

Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by Jasi7(m): 10:20am On Nov 30, 2014
Lianaluv:
Will comment when I wake up.

dnt tel ure stil sleepin...u havnt commented yet
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by Sanguine(f): 10:20am On Nov 30, 2014
Fortunately, I go to church only in my sleep...

1 Like

Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by onadana: 10:23am On Nov 30, 2014
[color=#006600][/color]
lalasticlala:
Sermon:
For All Those Who Fall Asleep in Church
Acts 20:7-12

Church sleepers beware.

If you think you can get away with sleeping in church then watch out! “A man who went to Church with his wife always fell asleep during the sermon. The wife decided to do something about this and one Sunday she took a long hatpin along with her to poke him with it every time he would doze off. As the preacher got to a part in the sermon where he asked, ‘and who created the universe in six days and rested on the seventh?,’ she poked her husband, who came flying out of the pew and screamed ‘Good God almighty’.”

“A man liked to sleep frequently in church, so the pastor devised a plan. During one service the pastor asked his congregation while the man was sleeping, ‘All who want to go to heaven, please rise.’ Everyone stood up except the sleeper. Then, at the top of his voice, he bellowed, ‘All who wish to go to hell, stand up now!’ Only the sleeper stood up. The sleeper looked around and said, ‘I don’t know what we’re voting on, Reverend, but it looks like you and me are the only ones for it’.”

Have you ever
fallen asleep
in church?

Some folk must really get into their Sunday School lesson because they are so worn out by the time the sermon rolls around that they just can’t help but fall asleep! Or maybe they have worked up such a sweat during the music that they are plumb tuckered out! Perhaps those taking forty winks during the sermon are resting up so they won’t doze off on the long drive home after service. Or they are simply getting ready for the energy they will expend buffet-ing their stomachs at Ryan’s after church.

Please don’t think I’m complaining about folks who fall asleep in church. I understand some people can’t help it. I am convinced that some people fall asleep in church during the sermon because their have a physical ailment. Some folk must have a snooze button attached at the appropriate place so that it is activated everytime the preacher says, “Please turn in your Bibles...”, and sets the alarm off when the preacher says, “Please stand…”!

It doesn’t really bother me when people fall asleep in church. It doesn’t even bother me if they snore during the sermon as long as it sounds like, “AHH-men”!

I confess to you today that I have fallen asleep during a sermon, or two, or twenty. I really haven’t kept track, but I must tell you that I have done something worse than falling asleep during a sermon. I once fell asleep standing up holding a hymnal and singing a congregational song! Were it not for the stiletto elbowing of the person holding the other side of the hymnbook, I might have been awakened by the floor!
Sleeping in church could be a good thing. Did you know if you came to church every Sunday and slept for 20 minutes during the sermon every week, you would have slept over 2 days in only 3 years!

On the other hand, the Bible records several bad things that happened to folks who fell asleep:
• Adam fell asleep
and woke up married and missing a rib!
• Samson fell asleep and woke up bald and beaten!
• Jonah fell asleep in the boat and woke up wet!
• Eutychus fell asleep and woke up dead!


Proverbs 6:10-11
10 A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest--
11 and poverty will come on you like a bandit and scarcity like an armed man.
(NIV)


Acts 20:7-9
7 On the first day of the week we came together to break bread. Paul spoke to the people and, because he intended to leave the next day, kept on talking until midnight.
8 There were many lamps in the upstairs room where we were meeting.
9 Seated in a window was a young man named Eutychus, who was sinking into a deep sleep as Paul talked on and on. When he was sound asleep, he fell to the ground from the third story and was picked up dead.
(NIV)

This passage of scripture is the earliest clear reference to the Christian practice of observing Sunday as a day of worship. The O.T. Jews met on the Sabbath or 7th day of the week, which was Saturday to commemorate the fact that God created the universe & everything in it in 6 days, & then on the 7th day He rested. So to the Jews, Sunday was to be a day of rest & worship. So those Jews who became Christians they continued to observe the Sabbath as well as the first day of the week. Early Christians began to meet on the first day of the week as a weekly celebration of the resurrection of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ from the dead.

Eutychus means “fortunate.” The Latin name for Eutychus is Fortunatus. But Eutychus is not very fortunate on this Sunday night. He definitely didn’t get away with sleeping in church. And this is the only mention of Eutychus in all of Scripture! Imagine looking down on earth from heaven and knowing that the ONLY thing for which you are remembered is that you fell asleep in church. By the way – let that be a warning to any of you who might be thinking of nodding off during today’s sermon…

It is interesting that Eutychus is not only remembered for this, his story mentions him by name.

Luke could have told this story and said, “One day Paul was preaching and going on and on, and someone fell asleep and fell right out of the window.”

But nooo. Luke calls him by name.

This is a tragic story! This boy went to church to worship God, and look what happened – he died! How would you feel if this happened to someone in a church service that you were attending? Would you say to yourself that no one could survive a fall from that height? Would you then become angry with God because you knew that the person would not have been dead if he had not been in that church service worshipping God? Some of us would react this way. Probably the boy’s parents and relatives felt this way, and they were very angry with God.

Why didn’t God pinch Eutychus and wake him up before he fell out of the window? Why didn’t God cause someone to notice that Eutychus was in trouble and in a precarious position?


Source: http://www.sermoncentral.com/sermons/for-all-those-who-fall-asleep-in-church-johnny-creasong-sermon-on-examples-of-faith-134427.asp

Semon on the mount. wink
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by smudge2079(m): 10:24am On Nov 30, 2014
I don't sleep in church....no way

1 Like 1 Share

Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by Mustiboy(m): 10:26am On Nov 30, 2014
And you expect me to read all that? *Sighs* how come this yeye fictional story enter frontpage? i'm out of here.
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by darlenese(f): 10:27am On Nov 30, 2014
So long a letter



Will read it tomoro
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by UnknownT: 10:38am On Nov 30, 2014
I travelled to my home town last week. In our local parish, the wardens are well known for waking 'sleepers' by touching them or 'knocking' on the pew if the sleeper is not within reach. So dat day, i sat on d last pew and an old female warden was sitting with us, then she started dozing. I had to do her job on her by knocking on the pew. Over here, d church wardens don't even send the sleepers, and some times i doze off too
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by roufy235(m): 10:42am On Nov 30, 2014
i dont sleep in mosque

1 Like 1 Share

Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by Debbieo(f): 10:43am On Nov 30, 2014
holyboss:
Well, I don sleep in church sad I browse nairaland sexuality section in church tongue tongue
shocked
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by Nobody: 10:44am On Nov 30, 2014
Ok
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by inikamoze(m): 10:45am On Nov 30, 2014
Slept off while reading the long epistle

btw.....I've not gone to church for over 9weeks now...so I cant sleep in church grin grin grin grin
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by ckmayoca: 10:46am On Nov 30, 2014
SeverusSnape:
I hardly slept in church when i was still a churchgoer, It just wasn't ideal for me, the speakers blaring on one's ears wouldn't even allow, also the ever present ushers who always poked those who slept, I always wanted to avoid being poked.

Next time its sleeps not slept
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by SeverusSnape(m): 10:48am On Nov 30, 2014
ckmayoca:


Next time its sleeps not slept
which of the "slept" should i Correct?...I mentioned it twice on my post.
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by Idyvalour(m): 10:50am On Nov 30, 2014
spillyboy14:
1. Sleeping in Church no good. we gree. But OP, those your stories no tally at all. The bible verses too no rhyme.

2. How I no go sleep for church where the preacher dey extra boring? For Instance "no beef intended just sayin ma opinion" When I had no option but to follow my uncle which I was squatting with to Deeper Life, The live sermon by Kumuyi was always extra boring.
That man preaches like he is reading a novel. I gats sleep off.

Wait hold on. Before I go.

This France guy, "we dont sleep in france, we dont know him in france, we dont bla bla bla in france........and so on". Has anyone told you those lines of yours are very wack? If you are trying to create a label for your self? You need to upgrade.

I pray for wisdom upon you.


Out..
the France thing is always funny abeg cool

2 Likes

Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by darlenese(f): 10:50am On Nov 30, 2014
Bro. Didn't u do summary in sch


With such a lenghty write why will some one not sleep, if u are a pastor, u will definitely have a sleeping congregation angry





#DOZING:.......
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by ckmayoca: 10:55am On Nov 30, 2014
SeverusSnape:

which of the "slept" should i Correct?...I mentioned it twice on my post.

Both sir.
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by Nobody: 10:58am On Nov 30, 2014
yuzjet:
Can't cheat nature Jor!
I'll rather not go.

1 Like

Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by SeverusSnape(m): 10:58am On Nov 30, 2014
ckmayoca:


Both sir.
with all due respect sir, you're wrong on this one.
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by ckmayoca: 11:03am On Nov 30, 2014
SeverusSnape:

with all due respect sir, you're wrong on this one.

I am serious . U may confirm with someone close to u. Hardly don't go with past tense.. Its continous tense thing. Usher poking is a continuous action also cos so it goes thus 'I hardly sleep in church'
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by ckmayoca: 11:04am On Nov 30, 2014
SeverusSnape:

with all due respect sir, you're wrong on this one.

I am serious . U may confirm with someone close to u. Hardly don't go with past tense.. Its continous tense thing. Usher poking is a continuous action also cos so it goes thus 'I hardly sleep in church' and not an english teacher but did engineering so I can't force it anyway. Just a hint sha.
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by SeverusSnape(m): 11:09am On Nov 30, 2014
ckmayoca:


I am serious . U may confirm with someone close to u. Hardly don't go with past tense.. Its continous tense thing. Usher poking is a continuous action also cos so it goes thus 'I hardly sleep in church' and not an english teacher but did engineering so I can't force it anyway. Just a hint sha.
Hehehehehe...I get your point, but look in between the lines, you'll see I'm right. Thanks for your concern though.
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by chekasforchekas: 11:26am On Nov 30, 2014
Later abeg am in the church.
Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by Skeelzz(m): 11:28am On Nov 30, 2014
Been living very happily without the need for church... smiley

1 Like

Re: For All Those Who Fall Asleep In Church by KingSolomonI: 11:31am On Nov 30, 2014
How can one wake up dead?

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