Disclaimer: all of this is only a joke John Purcell

Java: USA -- optimistic, powerful, likes to gloss over inconveniences.

C++: UK -- strong and exacting, but not so good at actually finishing things and tends to get overtaken by Java.

Python: The Netherlands. "Hey no problem, let'sh do it guysh!"

Ruby: France. Powerful, stylish and convinced of its own correctness, but somewhat ignored by everyone else.

Assembly language: India. Massive, deep, vitally important but full of problems.

Cobol: Russia. Once very powerful and written with managers in mind; but has ended up losing out.

SQL and PL/SQL: Germany. A solid, reliable workhorse of a language.

Javascript: Italy. Massively influential and loved by everyone, but breaks down easily.

Scala: Hungary. Technically pure and correct, but suffers from an unworkable obsession with grammar that will limit its future success.

C: Norway. Tough and dynamic, but not very exciting.

PHP: Brazil. Full of beauty and flouts itself a lot, but secretly very conservative.

LISP: Iceland. Incredibly clever and well-organised, but icy and remote.

Perl: China. Able to do apparently almost anything, but rather inscrutable.

Swift: Japan. One minute it's nowhere, the next it's everywhere and your mobile phone relies on it.

C#: Switzerland. Beautiful and well thought-out, but expect to pay a lot if you want to get seriously involved.

R: Liechtenstein. Probably really amazing, especially if you're into big numbers, but no-one knows what it actually does.

Awk: North Korea. Stubbornly resists change, and its users appear to be unnaturally fond of it for reasons we can only speculate on.

________ : Nigeria

Add yours..

Machine Language: Nigeria, very difficult to rule (program).

vanen2:
Machine Language: Nigeria, very difficult to rule (program).

#laughs your thought though..

Maven: Nigeria -- Great when everything works together. But so easily corrupted.

Nigeria probably will be SHELL Programming(Bash, tho not a language) :cause it's freaking rough.

Basic = Nigeria..

Erybody knows we suck...

True. Those characters reflect in those nations' colonies. Nigeria, like Britain, get things started but is soon overtaken by South Africa (a U.S colony). The French colonies have potentials but are ignored.
Nigeria: FORTRAN.

All these programming languages like FORTRAN, BASIC SHELL, were once useful and still do in some aspects. Is it that Nigeria is now obsolete?

Knownpal:
All these programming languages like FORTRAN, BASIC SHELL, were once useful and still do in some aspects. Is it that Nigeria is now obsolete?

Yes. With many legacy projects (like Ajaokuta Steel Plant and many others) written in it. Maybe it's struggling back like Fortran90/95, but how successful can it be? Even it's loyals doubt its future.
China - Perl, is moving on and has improved recently (Perl 6) with exciting possibilities for those that love mystery.