Here are some stories making headline news across Nigerian newspapers this week.

1. I’ll do better in my 2nd term if re-elected —Jonathan. All convicted criminals facing execution say a similar thing. Don’t they?
2. I am still PDP member – Gov. Lamido. Yes. Until midnight of February 13, 2015, when you’ll draw your knife.
3. I’ve fulfilled all my promises –Jonathan. Who tells this man to say things like this? I thank him, though. He writes Dr. Damages scripts for me.
4. N350bn spent on South-West roads –Minister. Is he talking about a road from South Africa to West Africa?
5. 'Why I Donated My Life Savings To Buhari' - Kebbi Grandma Speaks. So sweet! This is the triumph of hope over experience.
6. Subsidy on petrol now N1.23 per litre. So these people are still deceiving themselves while they think they’re deceiving Nigerians.
7. PDP steals N100 from every litre of kerosene – Oshiomhole. That’s the worst kind of stealing -stealing from the poor to pamper the rich.
8. Over N30tn stolen under Okonjo-Iweala – Soludo. Come on, if it’s true, America will know… unless they were dumped in American banks.
9. Presidential Poll: How Jonathan Will Beat Buhari In North – PDP. Someone needs chloroquine. This man has malaria.
10. Buhari’s Supporters Are Silly & Unrealistic – Etcetera. I’ve heard this before. Where? Where? Yeah! Used on Obama supporters 2008.
11. Obasanjo laid foundation for corruption in Nigeria –Don. So what did Babangida do? Mixed the cement used?
12. I sacrificed my presidential ambition for Buhari –Tinubu. This man doesn’t get it. Not in this life or the one to come will you smell it.
13. PDP pushed me out because I’m a Christian – Maku replies Mark, Ali. Christian for mouth! Don’t let Oyedepo open the gate of hell for you.




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cr-2GWE0h4M

Funny and stup|d

something is missing here: 1: stealing is not corruption- GEJ. 2: corruption is when 2 unmarried men sleeps together- GEJ.

Why does APC think it's funny to mock GEJ's relationship with God and Christianity in general?