The Jonathan Administration
And Its 50 Shades Of Lies By
Karo Orovboni
If there is one thing Nigerians are now
accustomed to, it is the numerous lies and
half-truths that have been told by the
President Goodluck Jonathan
administration. It is no longer strange to
hear officials of this administration lie to
Nigerians. It is so common place that they
now do it at will. This has inevitably come
at a cost; there is massive distrust
between the government and its citizens.
Well, here are the 50 shades of lies told by
the Jonathan-led administration.

1. Movement for the Emancipation of the Niger
Delta (MEND) are not responsible for the October
1st, 2010 Eagles Square bombing.
2. We will complete rehabilitation of all refineries
by March 2013.
3. Palliatives have been created to reduce effect
of the removal of fuel subsidy.
4. We have made plans to construct 6 modular
refineries.
5. The First Lady is not ill; she only went to
Germany to rest.
6. Nigerians are happy with the power situation
in the country.
7. We are generating more than 5,000
megawatts of electricity.
8. We have killed Boko Haram Leader, Shekau.
9. We have rescued all but 8 of the abducted
Chibok girls.
10. We have fixed 25,000km of roads in Nigeria.
11. We are fighting corruption head on.
12. The Nigerian troops tactically maneuvered
to Cameroon.
13. We have the vaccines for Ebola.
14. We have eradicated queues from petrol
stations.
15. Federal Government created 1.2 million jobs
for Nigerians from mining.
16. We have exposed decades of scam in the
management of pensions and fuel subsidy, and
ensured that the culprits are being brought to
book.
17. We have fixed Ore-Shagamu road.
18. We funded the multi-million-naira dam in
Malete, Kwara state.
19. President Jonathan has delivered on his
promises on power (electricity).
20. We have reduced poverty rate by 50 percent.
21. President Jonathan brought Facebook to
Nigeria.
22. The erstwhile governor of the Central Bank
of Nigeria (CBN), Sanusi Lamido Sanusi, could
be responsible for the increase in tempo of Boko
Haram activities.
23. The Jonathan administration executed the
dualization of Benin-Warri road.
24. Okpella Water Scheme project in Edo state
has been completed.
25. Soldiers never flogged innocent Nigerians on
the street under the Jonathan Administration.
26. The Jonathan administration has reduced
maternal mortality rate by 50 per cent.
27. President Jonathan does not interfere with
other arms of the government.
28. No Nigerian territory has been taken over by
Boko Haram
29. In terms of road infrastructure, no
government has done more than this
government.
30. No government has intervened in agriculture
more than this government.
31. The Jonathan administration has done more
in the petroleum sector than any other
administration in the Nigeria.
32. The rail system collapsed in this country
around 1983/1984, the Jonathan administration
is bringing it back.
33. We now live in a Nigeria where elections are
so transparent.
34. President Jonathan brought lasting peace to
Nigeria.
35. All airports in Nigeria have been remodeled.
36. We did not militarize Ekiti election.
37. Bring Back Our Girls Protesters prevented
the Chibok parents from seeing the President.
38. No money was given to the parents of the
abducted Chibok girls when they visited
President Jonathan.
39. Bring Back Our Girls group is a franchise;
they have bank account.
40. We have agreed a cease-fire deal with Boko
Haram.
41. Chibok girls will be released on Monday,
20th of October 2014.
42. There is no report of mutiny in Maimalari
Barracks, Maiduguri.
43. I never said I would not seek a second term
in office.
44. There was no massacre in Baga village.
45. Henry Okah was contracted to kill me.
46. The money Jim Nwobodo stole was not
enough to buy a Peugeot [car].
47. I did not dance in Kano after the first
Nyanya bombing.
48. We have recorded more convictions in this
administration than any other administration.
49. The Ekiti rigging tape is a fabrication.
50. The military has killed Boko Haram leader
Abubakar Shekau, at least three times.
please add yours below...

smsshola:
[s]The Jonathan Administration
And Its 50 Shades Of Lies By
Karo Orovboni
If there is one thing Nigerians are now
accustomed to, it is the numerous lies and
half-truths that have been told by the
President Goodluck Jonathan
administration. It is no longer strange to
hear officials of this administration lie to
Nigerians. It is so common place that they
now do it at will. This has inevitably come
at a cost; there is massive distrust
between the government and its citizens.
Well, here are the 50 shades of lies told by
the Jonathan-led administration.

1. Movement for the Emancipation of the Niger
Delta (MEND) are not responsible for the October
1st, 2010 Eagles Square bombing.
2. We will complete rehabilitation of all refineries
by March 2013.
3. Palliatives have been created to reduce effect
of the removal of fuel subsidy.
4. We have made plans to construct 6 modular
refineries.
5. The First Lady is not ill; she only went to
Germany to rest.
6. Nigerians are happy with the power situation
in the country.
7. We are generating more than 5,000
megawatts of electricity.
8. We have killed Boko Haram Leader, Shekau.
9. We have rescued all but 8 of the abducted
Chibok girls.
10. We have fixed 25,000km of roads in Nigeria.
11. We are fighting corruption head on.
12. The Nigerian troops tactically maneuvered
to Cameroon.
13. We have the vaccines for Ebola.
14. We have eradicated queues from petrol
stations.
15. Federal Government created 1.2 million jobs
for Nigerians from mining.
16. We have exposed decades of scam in the
management of pensions and fuel subsidy, and
ensured that the culprits are being brought to
book.
17. We have fixed Ore-Shagamu road.
18. We funded the multi-million-naira dam in
Malete, Kwara state.
19. President Jonathan has delivered on his
promises on power (electricity).
20. We have reduced poverty rate by 50 percent.
21. President Jonathan brought Facebook to
Nigeria.
22. The erstwhile governor of the Central Bank
of Nigeria (CBN), Sanusi Lamido Sanusi, could
be responsible for the increase in tempo of Boko
Haram activities.
23. The Jonathan administration executed the
dualization of Benin-Warri road.
24. Okpella Water Scheme project in Edo state
has been completed.
25. Soldiers never flogged innocent Nigerians on
the street under the Jonathan Administration.
26. The Jonathan administration has reduced
maternal mortality rate by 50 per cent.
27. President Jonathan does not interfere with
other arms of the government.
28. No Nigerian territory has been taken over by
Boko Haram
29. In terms of road infrastructure, no
government has done more than this
government.
30. No government has intervened in agriculture
more than this government.
31. The Jonathan administration has done more
in the petroleum sector than any other
administration in the Nigeria.
32. The rail system collapsed in this country
around 1983/1984, the Jonathan administration
is bringing it back.
33. We now live in a Nigeria where elections are
so transparent.
34. President Jonathan brought lasting peace to
Nigeria.
35. All airports in Nigeria have been remodeled.
36. We did not militarize Ekiti election.
37. Bring Back Our Girls Protesters prevented
the Chibok parents from seeing the President.
38. No money was given to the parents of the
abducted Chibok girls when they visited
President Jonathan.
39. Bring Back Our Girls group is a franchise;
they have bank account.
40. We have agreed a cease-fire deal with Boko
Haram.
41. Chibok girls will be released on Monday,
20th of October 2014.
42. There is no report of mutiny in Maimalari
Barracks, Maiduguri.
43. I never said I would not seek a second term
in office.
44. There was no massacre in Baga village.
45. Henry Okah was contracted to kill me.
46. The money Jim Nwobodo stole was not
enough to buy a Peugeot [car].
47. I did not dance in Kano after the first
Nyanya bombing.
48. We have recorded more convictions in this
administration than any other administration.
49. The Ekiti rigging tape is a fabrication.
50. The military has killed Boko Haram leader
Abubakar Shekau, at least three times.
please add yours below..[/s].

Rubbish!!!

SeverusSnape:

Rubbish!!!

Dear Tanoid,
U are still runing on windows Jona 0.6, wit processor speed of 26kb Lamb and 1kb memory. Pls upgrade to CHANGE 2015.

Are you sure this list is complete?
how about the one that said PEJ is a graduate?

yuncka:


Dear Tanoid,
U are still runing on windows Jona 0.6, wit processor speed of 26kb Lamb and 1kb memory. Pls upgrade to CHANGE 2015.

Dear Almajiri,
You're still running on Windows Buhari 0.00001 processor speed of 8 bytes and 1 byte memory. Please upgrade to TRANSFORMATION 2019.

SeverusSnape:

Dear nairalanders
I am an Almajiri, still running on Windows Buhari 0.00001 processor speed of 8 bytes and 1 byte memory. Please upgrade me to TRANSFORMATION 2019.

U wish.